执行力：情绪韧性的四大核心素质

FOUR CORE QUALITIES THAT MAKE UP EMOTIONAL FORTITUDE

Bossidy and Charan point out four core qualities that make up emotional fortitude:

(1)Authenticity

(2)Self-awareness

(3)Self-mastery

(4)Humility

Clearly these four qualities should be well-developed by the time an executive reaches a top position within a corporation. However, often one or two of them may appear to be underdeveloped. Leadership development at this level requires the services of a professionally trained executive coach to provide focus and guidance in enhancing these four qualities

1.Authenticity

Authenticity [ ???????????? ]真实性

You're real, not a fake [????]假货.Your outer person is the same as your inner person…Every man builds his world in his own image. He has the power to choose, but no power to escape the necessity of choice.

How one chooses to try to live more authentically depends on their own perspective on authenticity. Like many other popular concepts, different people have different views about authenticity and many people feel very strongly about their own views. Some people might assert that an individual is being authentic if they are being completely honest and participating in the here-and-now, e.g., an honest conversation with a friend, completely focused on cleaning out the garage, etc. There are others who assert that authenticity involves many other features, including, e.g., always being centered with themselves and others, living in a completely integrated fashion with their own values and principles, always feeling complete meaning or sense of purpose in their lives, etc.

2.Self-awareness

Self-awareness自知：Knowing others is wisdom[ ??????]智慧, knowing yourself is enlightenment[???●????????]启迪.

Know thyself [??????●?]你自己... It is the core of authenticity.

Self-awareness gives you the capacity to learn from your mistakes as well as your successes从错误和成功中吸取经验教训. It enables you to keep growing.

【从错误和成功中吸取经验教训】

(1)It all begins with awareness

【https://www.360docs.net/doc/7416339048.html,/awareness/question_tips.htm】

Awareness is the first step in the creation process. As you grow in self awareness, you will better understand why you feel, what you feel and why you behave as you behave. That understanding then gives you the opportunity and freedom to change those things you’d like to change about yourself and create the life you want. Without fully knowing who you are, self acceptance and change become impossible.

Having clarity about who you are and what you want (and why you want it), empowers you to consciously and actively make those wants a reality. Otherwise, you’ll continue to get “caught up” in your own internal dramas and unknown beliefs, allowing unknown thought processes to determine your feelings and actions.

If you think about it, not understanding why you do what you do, and feel what you feel is like going through your life with a stranger's mind. How do you make wise decisions and choices if you don't understand why you want what you want?

It's a difficult and chaotic way to live never knowing what this stranger is going to do next.

When we want good, solid information, we turn to the experts. So, who are you going to turn to for information about yourself? Who's the expert? –You.

Does a friend, a therapist, a minister, your hero, your spouse, your parents know more about you than you? They can't. You live in your skin and mind 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, and 52 weeks a year. Day in and day out, n o one’s closer to you than you! The answers are in th ere, perhaps all you’ve needed to solve your riddles is a useful question.

(2)Using questions to be more self aware

“Let us not look back in anger, nor forward in fear, but around in awareness.”

Questions can help you become more self aware. Are you where you live? Are you your job? Are you what you look like? The answers to these questions are only reflections of who you are to the outside world. But it’s just that, a reflection of your inner self. To go below the surface, the questions need to be more meaningful.

Think of the questions as being in layers. Each level or layer of questioning takes you closer and closer to the “core of your being.”

Example of Layers

What type of people do I enjoy spending time with?

Well...they have to be open-minded people. I really enjoy their company.

Why do I enjoy being with open-minded people?

Because then I can explore lots of different ideas. I enjoy searching for answers. And

if they’re open-minded, the exploration can go anywhere!

What do I mean by “exploration can go anywhere”?

I mean I can investigate all the big questions in life like...Why are we here or where

do emotions come from?

How does being with open-minded people assist me in exploring those questions?

Well...if they’re open-minded they won’t make fun of my ideas.

Why is it important to me that people not make fun of my ideas?

Because it feels like my ideas are..well...me. I don’t like being made fun of.

Why don’t I like being made fun of?

Because then I feel shitty about myself.

Why would I feel shitty about myself if people made fun of me?

Because they’re not accepting me for who I am!

Why do I feel shitty if others don’t accept me for who I am?

Because it means I’m not OK.

H ow does others not accepting me mean I’m not okay?

Hmmmm.... I guess it doesn't have to mean that.

As you can see, the further down in the questioning process you go, the more you can tap into why you do what you do and who you are. It will take time for you to go through all the questions if you keep digging down each layer. Feel free to refer back to this example when answering the questions.

3.Self-mastery

Self-mastery自我控制: When you know yourself, you can master yourself.

You can keep your ego[ ?????]利已主义, 自负in check, take responsibility for your behavior【为自己的行为负责，By Stone】, adapt to change, embrace[????????]拥抱new ideas, and adhere to your standards of integrity [ ?????????? ]正直and honesty under all conditions.

Self-mastery is the key to true self-confidence自信.Self-confident people contribute the most to dialogues【自信的人对对话的贡献最大。By Stone】.

They know they don’t know everything; they are actively curious, and

encourage debate to bring up opposite views and set up the social ambience [ ???????]气氛of learning from others. They can take risks, and relish [ ??●??]意味, 喜欢hiring people who are smarter than themselves.

They know they don’t know everything; they are actively curious, and encourage debate to bring up opposite views and set up the social ambience [ ???????]气氛of learning from others. They can take risks, and relish hiring people who are smarter than themselves.

?12 Step self mastery program

The Melchizedek Synthesis Light Academy

【Source from: https://www.360docs.net/doc/7416339048.html,/12steps.htm】

That great mechanic in they sky

Step 1:

Picture yourself driving a car, which you have used, abused and neglected and then you have a breakdown. Seeing as you think you already know it all, you try everything to get the car started by yourself, running down the battery, poking in the engine, pushing it and eventually kicking the tires in frustration - becoming ever more frustrated in the process!

With the giving up and realizing defeat by admitting to yourself that you can't get it started alone…….. Comes the fi rst feeling of relief and the knowledge that a power greater than self could help.

Step 2:

Calling on the help of a qualified mechanic and trusting in him to get your car started initiates 'belief in a power greater than self'.

Step 3:

Declaring to yourself that you are indeed helpless in your present situation and making a decision to hand your car over to a mechanic brings more relief and a stronger growing connection to a "Power greater than self" - developing faith!

Step 4:

The mechanic has got your car going again and you are on the move. Now you decide to take a good look at your vehicle and make a list of all its faults, defects and good points so that you no longer drive blind or in denial……….

Step 5:

Admitting to yourself and to your mechanic, the way you have abused your car whether it was deliberate or in ignorance causes you to learn from your past mistakes. Suddenly mistakes don't seem like failures, but more like teachers.

Step 6:

You are now wiser and more prepared to have all the necessary repairs carried out regularly before you get into a breakdown situation again.

Step 7:

Learn humility by asking the mechanic for help to carry out all the repairs regularly and remember where grandiosity or knowing it all got you at Step 1!

Step 8:

Consider your friends, family, colleagues and neighbors who have suffered as a result of your bad temper and unreliability due to the noisy, battered, neglected old car.

Step 9:

Apologize.

Step 10

Continue to maintain and service your car daily - learning advanced techniques, which others might consider odd, but that you now know work well and bring peace of mind.

Step 11:

Ask and learn how to be receptive to being guided by those who know more about cars than you do.

Step 12:

Tell other people about the joys of having a good mechanic, someone you can really trust and how pleasant and easy your driving has become.

This twelve-step program is a process of personal transformation in which we are able to change our negative feelings about life into positive feelings. Remember it's not what people say or do to us that hurts us, it's our attitude to what they say and do and so it is with life generally. My own personal experience on working with this 12 step program was that I progressed through four stages of growth on what I now realise is a journey of the soul.

UNCONSCIOUS INCOMPETENCE, which is characterized by our actions under the influence of our obsessions, compulsions and attachments. Here we are very much in 'victim consciousness' taking everything personally; blaming others most of the time and our emotions are negative most of the time. CONSCIOUS INCOMPETENCE which is characterized by the beginnings of reconnection to Spirit, when we discover that our primary obsession, compulsion, addiction or attachment was not the only problem we had. Here we are beginning to connect to higher aspects of self and discover GOD, but we are still fairly negative and blaming in our patterns of behavior.

CONSCIOUS COMPETENCE, which is characterized by continued and consistent efforts to incorporate Spiritual integration into our daily lives. Here we begin to experience self-responsibility and self acceptance. We begin to work through and transform negative emotions into positive feelings with no blaming. By identifying old negative habitual patterning we can substitute more positive patterns.

UNCONSCIOUS COMPETENCE which is characterized by our ability to

practice integrated spirituality and all its principles without thought or effort. This leads to harmony and empowerment, where although we can see external negativity in life around us, we are unaffected by it. Now we are living in positive emotions all the time - this is self mastery.

Moving through Stages 1 to 3 requires humility, self honesty, dedication and commitment to higher ideals and values, a spiritual way of life through learning the process of co-creation. Moving into Stage 4 and staying there requires weeks, months and years of practice, acting 'as if' and devotion during which time eventually practice and actin g as if suddenly becomes being………… Then you are there and you are creating heaven on earth in moment to moment conscious awareness.

1. As an 'apprentice' GOD on the path of Ascension and Initiation, I now fully 100% claim my own personal power and God’s p ower in my life and stop giving my personal power and energy to outside situations, things or people and to the negative ego/fear based separative mind! My personal power and God's Power combined and blended in the service of unconditional Love is an unbeatable team!

2. We acknowledge that by choosing to consciously connect to ourselves and GOD in this way, we can be transformed and restored to wholeness.

3. "God = Man Minus Ego!" We make a commitment to align to this teaching 'consciously' 24 hours per day, seven days a week, no matter who or what or where.

4. As MSLA Light workers we undertake to make in writing an honest and courageous personal scrutiny or insight of ourselves. Further we commit to practicing vigilance that all our energies, words-thoughts-feelings are continually aligned with Christ Consciousness.

5. At the Second Stage of MSLA Energy Mastery we openly share to ourselves and another in the group, our life lessons so far, exposing all our negative patterns and conditioning, as well as our GOD qualities.

6. Transmutation - we are entirely ready and committed to repattern and reprogram positive behaviour patterns using the MSLA Energy Mastery Techniques we have learned.

7. Humility - in deepest humility, we forgive self and others and ask to be forgiven. We learn to practice self-acceptance on a daily basis, again embracing the MSLA Energy Mastery Techniques we have learned.

8. Karmic debts - we list all persons to whom we are aware of having a karmic debt and become willing to redress the balance.

9. We enter the final stage of integrated MSLA Energy Mastery and affirm that we are actively addressing karmic balance with perception and discernment on a daily basis.

10. We commit to being ever vigilant in attaining God Realization by consciously conquering the negative ego and fear based thinking on a moment by moment basis and consciously working towards attaining our 7 Planetary Initiations. 11. MSLA Light workers commit to developing the necessary self discipline to maintain daily conscious alignment to GOD, via prayer, meditation and

recommended MSLA Energy Mastery processes.

12. Having developed MSLA Energy Mastery, as MSLA Light workers, we

pledge to carry this message by example and practice these principles in all our thoughts, words and a ctions…

4.Humility

Humility[ ]谦卑

The more you can contain your ego, the more realistic you are about your problems. …You can learn from at any time.

Humility or humbleness is a quality of being courteously respectful of others. It is the opposite of aggressiveness, arrogance, boastfulness, and vanity. Rather than, "Me first," humility allows us to say, "No, you first, my friend." Humility is the quality that lets us go more than halfway to meet the needs and demands of others.

Friendships and marriages are dissolved over angry words. Resentments divide families and co-workers. Prejudice separates race from race and religion from religion. Reputations are destroyed by malicious gossip. Greed puts enmity between rich and poor. Wars are fought over arrogant assertions.

Humility as a virtue is a major theme of both the Old and New Testaments.

Why do qualities such as courtesy, patience and deference have such a prominent place in the Bible? It is because a demeanor of humility is exactly what is needed to live in peace and harmony with all persons. Humility dissipates anger and heals old wounds. Humility allows us to see the dignity and worth of all God's people. Humility distinguishes the wise leader from the arrogant power-seeker.

Acting with humility does not in any way deny our own self worth. Rather, it affirms the inherent worth of all persons. Some would consider humility to be a

psychological malady that interferes with "success." However, wealth, power

or status gained at the expense of others brings only anxiety -- never peace and

love.

4.1The Humble Demeanor

【Source from: https://www.360docs.net/doc/7416339048.html,/humility.htm】

We should maintain an attitude of deference toward both God and other persons.

Wisdom cannot be found or practiced through arrogance or anger. As servants of God, we must respect all of God's creation, including our fellow human beings.

Do not boast about tomorrow, for you do not know what a day may bring forth. Let another praise you, and not your own mouth; someone else, and not your own lips. (NIV, Proverbs 27:1-2)

When pride comes, then comes dishonor, but with the humble is wisdom. The integrity of the upright will guide them, but the falseness of the treacherous will destroy them. (NAS, Proverbs 11:2-3)

Humility means putting God and other persons ahead of our own selfish interests.

Humility comes with the knowledge that God's creation as a whole transcends our own narrow interests. As with other aspects of wisdom, humility will gain us much more than we sacrifice.

Humility and the fear of the LORD bring wealth and honor and life. (NIV, Proverbs 22:4)

"But the greatest among you shall be your servant. "And whoever exalts himself shall be humbled; and whoever humbles himself shall be exalted. (NAS, Matthew 23:11-12)

And [Jesus] called a child to Himself and set him before them, and said, "Truly I say to you, unless you are converted and become like children, you shall not enter the kingdom of heaven.

"Whoever then humbles himself as this child, he is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.

(NAS, Matthew 18:2-4)

4.2The Golden Rule

Do to others as you would have them do to you.

"If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even 'sinners' love those who love

them. And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even

'sinners' do that. And if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment, what credit is that

to you? Even 'sinners' lend to 'sinners,' expecting to be repaid in full. But love your enemies, do

good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will

be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked.

(NIV, Luke 6:31-35)

The Golden Rule,spoken by Jesus[ ???????]耶稣, is possibly the best

known quote from the Bible圣经, and contains a lot of wisdom in one short

sentence. If we wish to be loved, we must first give love. If we wish to be

respected, we must respect all persons, even those we despise

[????????]轻视. If we wish to be fulfilled in our lives, we must share

generously with others.