幽默英语演讲稿6篇
幽默英语演讲稿6篇Humorous English speech
编订：JinTai College
幽默英语演讲稿6篇
小泰温馨提示：演讲稿是在较为隆重的仪式上和某些公众场合发表的讲话文稿。演讲稿是进行演讲的依据，对演讲内容和形式的规范和提示，体现着演讲的目的和手段，用来交流思想、感情，表达主张、见解；也可以用来介绍自己的学习、工作情况和经验等等；同时具有宣传、鼓动、教育和欣赏等作用，可以把演讲者的观点、主张与思想感情传达给听众以及读者，使他们信服并在思想感情上产生共鸣。本文档根据演讲稿内容要求展开说明，具有实践指导意义，便于学习和使用，本文下载后内容可随意修改调整及打印。
本文简要目录如下：【下载该文档后使用Word打开，按住键盘Ctrl键且鼠标单击目录内容即可跳转到对应篇章】
1、篇章1：幽默英语演讲稿
2、篇章2：幽默英语演讲稿
3、篇章3：幽默英语演讲稿
4、篇章4：幽默英语演讲稿
5、篇章5：幽默英语演讲稿
6、篇章6：幽默英语演讲稿
篇章1:幽默英语演讲稿
love your mother
why are you crying, a young boy asked his mom?
你为什么哭?一个小男孩问他的妈妈.
"because i'm a woman," she told him.
因为我是女人,她告诉他.
"i don't understand," he said.
his mom just hugged him and said,
"and you never will, but that's o.k.".......
妈妈拥抱了他说,"你永远也不会明白,但没关系..."
later the little boy asked his father,
"why does mom seem to cry for no reason?".
后来小男孩问他的父亲"妈妈为什么似乎在无缘无故的哭泣?"
"all women cry for no reason," was all his dad could say......
"所有的女人都会常常没有原因地哭泣",这是他的父亲唯一可以解释的...
the little boy grew up and became a man,
still wondering why women cry.
等到小男孩长大,成了男人的时候,
他仍然奇怪妈妈为什么哭.
finally he put in a call to god and when god got back to him, he asked "god, why do women cry so easily?"
最后他把这件事祷告给上帝,他问"上帝,为什么女人容易哭泣?"
god answered......
"when i made woman,
i decided she had to be special.
i made her shoulders
strong enough to carry
the weight of the world, yet,
made her arms gentle enough to give comfort... "当我创造女人的时候,
我决定把她造的很特别,
我让她的双肩强壮的足以能够承担整个世界,但是,却让她的双臂温柔的足够去安慰他人...
i gave her the inner strength
to endure childbirth
and the rejection
that many times will come
even from her own children.
我给她内在的力量去忍受生产的剧痛,
也让她有勇气承受无数的伤害,
甚至这些伤害有时会来自于自己的孩子...
i gave her a hardness
that allows her
to keep going and take care
of her family and friends,
even when everyone else gives up, through sickness and fatigue without
complaining....
我给她顽强,让她能够不断地前进,
并且照顾自己的家人和朋友,
甚至当每个人都放弃的时候,
她却能够坚强地在疾病和劳累之时毫无怨言...
i gave her the sensitivity to love her children under any and all circumstances. even when her child has hurt her badly....
she has the very special power to make a child's boo-boo feel better and to quell a teenager's anxieties and fears....
我给她内心的敏感,让她在任何环境下都深爱着自己的孩子.甚至在他们深深伤害她的时候．．．
她用那特别的力量，让年幼孩子的在受伤的时候感到安慰，也能够让年轻的子女消除紧张与恐惧．．．
i gave her strength to care for her husband, despite faults
and i fashioned her from his rib to protect his heart....
我给她力量关心她的丈夫，尽管他会犯错．我用男人的
肋骨创造了女人，使女人可以保护男人的心脏．．．
i gave her wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife, but sometimes tests her
strengths and her resolve to stand beside him unfalteringly....
我给她智慧，让她知道一个好丈夫永远不会伤害他的妻子，但有时候会试炼她坚定的永远跟随自己丈夫的能力与决心．for all of this hard work,
i also gave her a tear to shed.
it is hers to use
whenever needed and
it is her only weakness....
when you see her cry,
tell her how much you love her, and all she does for everyone, and even though
she may still cry, you will have made her heart feel good.
因为这些种种的困难，
我也同样赐她流下眼泪，
这是当她在需要时可以使用的，
这是她唯一的软弱之处．．．
当你看到她哭泣的时候，
告诉她你有多么地爱她，
告诉她她为所有人所做的一切，
即使这样她可能还是会哭泣，
但你会使她的心里得到安慰．
she is special!
please send this to women you know, and those with mothers,
sisters, and special women in their lives.
请把这个信息传递给你认识的女人，有母亲，姐妹和特别的女性在他们生命里的人．
but, also send this to men so they will understand about what a wonderful thing a woman is.
each day is a mountain that must be climbed; with courage each step gets easier.
但是，也把这个信息传递给男人，因此他们会明白女人是多么奇妙的被造物．
每一天，生活中都会有必须爬的山，但是勇气会使每一步都更轻松．
love your mother always
and keep her smiling
篇章2:幽默英语演讲稿【按住Ctrl键点此返回目录】
A little kid fell in love with another little kid, a school mate. Sometimes the kids think they fall in love when they have a crush on someone else in the class, when they?re eight or ten years old or something like that. So the eight-year-oldkid came back home and asked his father, “Father, is it expensive to be married?” And the father said, “Yes, son, it is very expensive.” So the son asked, “How much does it cost?” And the father said, “I don?t know, son. I?m still paying.”
有个小孩爱上了另一个小孩，对方是学校的同学。八岁
或十岁左右的孩子有时会迷恋班上某个人，然后就以为自己恋爱了。因此这个八岁的小孩回家问他爸爸：「爸爸，结婚很花钱吗?」爸爸说：「是啊，儿子，非常花钱。」儿子又问：「要花多少钱呢?」爸爸说：「我不知道，儿子，我到现在还一直在付钱啊!」
篇章3:幽默英语演讲稿【按住Ctrl键点此返回目录】
Tom is a little boy, and he is only seven years old.
Once he goes to a cinema. It is the first time for him to do that. He buys a ticket and goes in. But after two or three minutes he comes out, and buys the second ticket and goes in again.
After a few minutes he comes out again and buys the third ticket. Two or three minutes after that he comes out and asks for another ticket.
But a girl asks him,“Why do you buy so many tickets? H ow many friends do you meet?”
“No, I have no friends here, but a big woman always stops me at the door and cuts up my ticket.”
汤姆是个小孩，他才7岁。
当他去电影院的时候。那时他第一次去。他买了张票进去了。但没过两三分钟他就出来了，然后买了第二张票又进去了。
几分钟后他又出来买了第三张票。接着两三分钟后他又出来买票。
一个女的问她，“你为什么要买那么多票啊? 你见到了
几个朋友?"
"没有，我里面没朋友，但是每当我进门的时候一位大
的女人老把我的票给剪了"
篇章4:幽默英语演讲稿【按住Ctrl键点此返回目录】
BUYING A HAT
A lady went to a hat shop to buy a hat. As she
was very fussy, it took her a long time to pick on one. Already at the end of his patience the salesman was afraid that she might change her mind again so he
tried to flatter her: "An excellent choice, madam. You look at least ten years younger with this hat on!" To his dismay, the lady took off her hat at once and said: "I don't want a hat that makes me look ten years older as soon as I take it off. Show me some more hats!"
一位妇女到一家帽子店买帽子。她很挑剔，用了很长时
间才选好了一顶。已经忍耐到极限的售货员害怕她再改变主意，便恭维她："你做了极好的选择，夫人。你戴上这顶帽子看上
去起码年轻十岁!"但令他沮丧的是，这位女士马上摘下了她的
帽子说："我不想要一顶摘下来便使我立刻显得老十岁的帽子。多拿一些帽子给我看看!
篇章5:幽默英语演讲稿【按住Ctrl键点此返回目录】
A Shepherd-boy, who tended his flock not far from a village, used to amuse himself at times in crying out"wolf !wolf!"Twice or thrice his trick
succeeded .The whole village came running out to his assistance when all the return they got was to be laughed at for their pains .At last one day the wolf came indeed .The boy cried out in earnest. But his neighbors, supposing him to be at his old sport, paid no heed to his cries, and the wolf devoured the sheep. So the boy learned, when it was too late, that liars are not believed even when they tell the truth.
一个放羊的孩子在离村子不远的地方放羊。他为了开心
寻乐常喊："狼来了!狼来了!"他的恶作剧有两三次达到了目的。全村的人都跑来帮忙，而他们所得到的回报却是一顿嘲笑，白费了心力。最后，有一天狼真的来了。这个孩子认真地大喊起来。但是他的邻人们却以为他又在耍把戏，谁都不理会他的喊
叫，于是狼把羊吃了。因此这牧童得到了教训：爱说谎的人，甚至在他说真话的时候，也没人相信他，但是他知道得太晚了。篇章6:幽默英语演讲稿【按住Ctrl键点此返回目录】
There was a guy who went into a shop to buy a parrot. There werethree parrots in the shop. One was $5,000; another one, $10,000; and the third one,
$30,000.
The customer asked the owner, “How come this guy is $5,000? That?s so expensive for this kindof parrot.”
The owner said, “Because I have trained him and he can talk.”
So the customer asked him, “How about this guy? What can he do that makes him so expensive?”
The owner said, “Well, apart from talking, he
can also do some amusing actions,like dancing and so on. That?s why he?s so expensive.”
Then the customer said, “How about the third one? What canhe do that makes him so expensive?”
The owner of the shopsaid, “I don?t know. Normally, I have never heard him talk, nor dance, nor whistle, nor sing, nothing at all! But the other two call him …The Boss.?”
有个人到一间商店买鹦鹉。店里有三只鹦鹉，其中一只卖五千元，另一只卖一万元，还有一只卖三万元。
顾客问老板：「为什么这只要卖五千元?这个价钱对这种鹦鹉来说太贵了!」
老板说：「因为我有训练他讲话。」
顾客又问：「那这只呢?他会做什么?为什么要卖这么贵?」老板说：「他除了会说话之外，还会表演一些有趣的动作，好比说跳舞等等，所以才卖这么贵。」
顾客接着又问：「那第三只呢?他会做什么?为什么要卖这么贵?」
老板说：「我不知道。我从没听过他讲话、吹口哨或唱歌，也没看过他跳舞，什么都没有!不过另外两只叫他：『老板!』
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