跨文化交际论文

姓名：张雪儿学号：2013210048

Differences in Family Values between China and America

摘要：随着中国的改革开放，妇女社会地位的提高，中国的家庭观受美国家庭观的影响很大，但中美家庭观的差异仍然很显著。大多数人都认为中国人的家庭意识很强，而美国人在家庭方面更注重个人在家庭中的权利和个人的发展。在中国，女子读大学，工作的情况越来越普遍，中国社会出现了很多女强人，即使有了小孩，依然将自己生活的中心放在工作上，而美国家庭有小孩了之后，女性往往会选择放弃工作，回家带小孩，若孩子长大成人了，她们也可以选择再回去工作。下面我会从不同方面来阐述中美家庭观不同的缘由，并希望人们能正确对待文化之间的差异，取其精华，去其糟粕，同时呼吁更多的女性回归家庭。

This research is about the differences in family values between Chinese families and American families,which is refer to the common families.The families of famous stars and people who own a great deal of fortune are not included.

There is a very famous American TV series called“Desperate Housewives”.The story is about the lives of five housewives who lead lives of quite desperation.When they prepare to give births to babies,they will quit there jobs and choose to be a full-time mother.A typical housewife is called lenet.She is moving up to corporal ladders,but when her doctor announce lenet is pregnant,her husband has an idea.He said,“ why no t quit your job?kids do better with stay-at-home moms,and it would be so much less stressful.”But this is not the case.in fact,lenet’s life has become so hectic.When she drives a car,her boys will act up.They will jump up and down not wearing seat belts.Her boys are so naughty that she is always humiliated in front of whole neighborhood. According to the TV series,being a American housewife is a miserable thing,but the reality is not like that.When I went to a Cafe,I met 2 Americans who have been married.One of them even has 2 children who are both grown-ups.She said It was true that when a woman has a baby,she will quit her job and took care of her child on her own.She believed that in this way her kid would grow better.As a matter of fact,this was not a terrible thing to stay at home and raise a baby.On the contrary,this was the happiest thing in her life and she could feel the sense of achievement.She thought the God created her baby and she shaped her baby’s personality.Besides it,that lady has been married to her husband for about thirty years.they are very royalty to each other and she always said she loved her husband.She is very satisfied with her marital life.It is confirmed in terms of her words that most American families have a exceedingly strong sense of family.Of

course,although a couple get married,they still maintain their respective privacy.they pay respect to each other.When it comes to another American woman I met,she said most young couples in American would leave their previous houses.What’s more,every Christmas she would exchange gift with her husband.And she wanted to have several kids.Then she added it was obvious that if she had a baby,she would choose to give up her job and work at home as a mother.For traditional Chinese family value,if a woman gets married,she must stay at home and everyday she must well-prepare the meal and wait for her husband.Gone are the days when the Chinese women have to be a housewives after hey get married.As the accelerated development of economy and the rise of the social status of women,nowadays,more and more women keep their jobs after they get married,even when they have their own babies.Some women even get back to work after several days they give birth to their babies.Finally,the babies deliver to grandparents to be taken care.There are also some couples who are willing to bear the suffering being apart for the sake of the work.For an American,this is the thing which cannot be accepted if a couple can’t have physical contact for about three https://www.360docs.net/doc/5b7188486.html,ually,Chinese couples tend to know everything to one another.Despite of it,Chinese couples seldom show their love to each other,especially in the public.

First,verbal communication factors into the reason why family value differs between Chinese family and American family.American people are good at express their feelings to their family members.They would like to say“I love you”to their lovers and also their kids.They show their care through their words.And while Chinese people seldom use verbal message to show their love to their family members.The second reason has something to do with nonverbal communication.American people are not only skilled at have a talk with their family members,but they have a lot of body movements as well,such as facial movements,posture,and gesture.In addition,Most Americans like to have physical contact with their family members.For example,family members usually hug and kiss each other when they come back home.However,Chinese people would like to do everything for their family members and consider it is not necessary for their family members to know it.There are some truth there that Chinese members seldom kiss or hug to one another.The third reason is about customs communication.Among many cultures--particularly collective cultures.Gift giving is a common practice.Individualistic western cultures,especially the U.S. Often view these payments as a form

of bribery.Another reason is the different orientation towards activity.American people think self-expression and taking action both are the most important activities,so they try their best to do something and say something in a direct way which is simple and effective to create a warm atmosphere in families.As to Chinese people,they attach great importance to the inner self-development which they think is the most important process.In other words,we can say sometimes Chinese people pretend to be one way on the outside when they are totally different on the inside.There is a tendency that they put a lot of feelings in their heart.For example,Chinese parents love their kids very much.Some of them will be very strict to their young kids which they think is for the kids’ own good.On the contrary,they don’t know how to communicate with their kids,which give a rise to the misunderstanding between these two generations in a family.There is also some relevant to Hofstede’s Dimension of Culture Variability which consists of four parts,individualism and collectivism,high and low power distance,masculinity and femininity,high and low uncertainty avoidance.The first part is individualism and collectivism.American people pay more attention to individualism while Chinese people focus more on collectivism.Even though an American girl and an American boy get married,and even though they have their own babies,and even though couples have their common property, privacy space is also one of the most important thing in their marriage lives.Couples have their common property.Right consciousness in an American family is very strong,It refers that each family members regard themselves as the center rather than the whole family.Everyone can make a decision themselves,Such as love, marriage, family, job, issues about choosing the place to settle to settle. Meanwhile others have no right to interfere.In terms o f children in a family,parents should respect children’s privacy.They can not have access to their kids’ letters and diaries or other private stuffs without their kids’ permission.When it comes to Chinese culture,collectivism seems to be a tradition.And as we all know,China is a socialist state,collectivism has special status in Chinese people’s https://www.360docs.net/doc/5b7188486.html,pared with the interest of a family and the interest of a person,family always comes the first.When the confrontation between the family and an individual occurs,Chinese people will sacrifice their own interest to meet the need of their family interest.Moreover,this kind of behavior is going to be praised by not only the family members,but also relatives and Chinese society.They believe that only if the interest of a family is guaranteed,personal interest will not be infringed.The next part is high power distance and low power distance.American falls under the category of low power

distance.Developing capitalism has a profound impact on American families.Most American ancestors came from Britain and other western European countries.They had a strong desire to get rid of the feudal restriction.They want freedom,equality,and the right of pursue the happiness which has already been written into “Independence of Declaration”.This is the reason why they settled in America.So family rank based family system in Europe does not exist in America.As a result,wealth becomes the weighing standard to the development of a family while family background and inherited status follow the second.In a normal Chinese family,seniors are the authority.young people have to follow their words,otherwise,society will regard them as one of those people who do not respect the elder.Parents have the power to make decisions for their kids and kids usually have to follow the road of their parents’ wishes.Then,The third part,masculinity and femininity, is also concerned with family values.As I mentioned before,American people enjoy highly right of equality and they won’t make compromise with ine quality.If necessary,they will even break their marriage for the right of equality.In ancient Chinese society,masculinity is a privilege for a man.That is to say,in Chinese family,women have to listen to their husbands.If a woman have strong ideas all the time,something may be going on.

We can not deny that both Chinese people and American people value their family in many aspect.As China has a step closer to opening its door,American movies,business and daily life communication have an influence on Chinese people’s family value more or less.Through the research of the differences of family value between Chinese and American,we should view different cultures in an objective way.We should learn to comprehend these differences,tolerate these differences and respect these differences.Despite of it,it is more crucial for us to get the most valuable part of different cultures.Nowadays,the economy of China ranks a lot higher all around the world and the status of women also grows higher.More and more Chinese women do not like to be confined to be housewives.They want to have their own financial incomes and regard work much too important,even more important than their family.Having their own career is a manifestation of equality.To some extent,Americans are very wise to get back home as stay-at-home mothers.Most these mothers are well-educated.That doesn’t mean they have to apply the knowledge to their work but as a precondition to be eligible mothers.Mother is the first teacher in a child’s life.so it is better not s et off on a wrong foot.Although Americans have a strong sense of individualism,family is by no means to be ignored.Although Chinese economy is accelerated

developed,calling for the Chinese women who have babies to return home becomes a urgent issue.A good education gives a child a bright future,and parents play a vital role in education.