创新大学英语预备级第三单元Part Three Intensive Reading

Do you know how to get on with people? Do you ever feel shy？ What situation makes you shy？ Do you sometimes feel as if you don't know how to interest and amuse people and have conversations with them？ Do you search desperately in your head for something to say？ Do people find an excuse to leave you as soon as they can？ Try listening！
Psychologists, counselors and doctors also know that listening is part of their job. If they listen with care and concern the patient may even solve the problem！They are professional listeners. Here is some advice they give. • Show the other person that you are listening. • Look at them. • Smile and nod quite often. • Shake you head or raise your eyebrows if you don't follow what they are saying. • Don't tap your foot because this will show impatience. • Don't look at your watch unless you really have to know the time,（and then you should tell the other person why you need to know the time）。 If you show impatience then the other person will lose the moment of friendship which they are offering.
Some professional listeners give some advice about listening.
Part Three: para13 Main Ideas: A good listener has magic, and is as valuable at a party as a good talker.
心理学家、咨询顾问和医生也都知道聆听是他们工作的一部 分。如果他们关切、用心地倾听病人所想，没准就能解决病 人的问题！他们是专业的倾听者。下面是他们提出的一些建 议： • 让别人感到你在听他们聆听。 • 注视对方。 • 面带微笑，并不时点头。 • 如果没有听懂，可以摇头或者皱皱眉来向对方示意。 • 别用脚敲地板，以免显得不耐烦了。 • 别看手表，除非你确实需要知道时间。看的话也请告知原 因。如果你表现出不耐烦的话，对方也会丧失建立友谊的 热忱。
你知道怎样和人打交道吗? 你感到害羞过吗? 什么场合让你害羞了?你时常感到自己不知 道该怎样引起别人对你的兴趣，不知道该 这样和别人开玩笑，不知道该怎样和他们 交谈吗?你总是绞尽脑汁地想找点话说吗? 有人找借口想尽快离开你吗? 试试聆听！
一天，我的一位邻居在谈论他的孩子 。上 周的一天晚上，我和汉娜坐在一起，她对 我说：“你真是位了不起的母亲!” 我说： “你是突然说这话的吧?” 她说：“哎呀， 尽管你总是很忙，可你总是能够停下干你 手头的活听我说话。”
How to Be a Good Listener When I first went to London as a student I sat alone during parties with my glass of wine. I hoped people would think that someone might come up to me and say, “Excuse me！I hope you won„t mind my coming up to you like this, I don't want to interrupt your thoughts… but really, you are the only interesting looking person in the room！ May I talk to you？”
记住，比起你和你面临的问题与你交谈的 人更乐于谈论他们自己及其自身的问题。 与他们交流时，应尽量设身处地地为对方 考虑，这样使双方更容易找到问题的解决 方法，并有助于你理解不同于自己的观点。
传说中住在桶里的希腊哲学家欧根尼说： “我们人类有两只耳朵，但却只有一张嘴 的原因就是我们不妨多听少说!”
A neighbor of mine talked about her child the other day. “ One evening last week I was sitting with Hannah, and she said to me, „You are a marvelous mum!‟ And I said, „Why do you say that suddenly?‟ And she said, “Well, although you are always busy you always stop what you are doing to listen to me.”
A good listener has magic！ A good listener has the ability to make people feel good， and is as valuable at a party as a good talker. But just listening isn't enough. One should listen intelligently by trying to find out what the other person would really like to commun果你期望说服别人购买你的产品，那 你得迫使对方开口，与你交谈……。而做 到这一点的唯一方法就是停止喋喋不休， 转而倾听。”
“多听少言。”(摘自《哈姆雷特》) 航空公司工作人员要经过培训如何去聆听 抱怨，如果他们能表示出同情，并耐心听 听乘客的问题，那么这些问题就不会那么 严重。
好的听众很有魔力! 好的听众能让人感觉舒 服，派对上，好的听众与好的谈话者同等 重要。但是一味地听是不够的。应明智地 听，并弄懂对方真正想交流的是什么。
Part One: paras1-2 Main Ideas: The author wished somebody would start a conversation with him at
parties, but it never happened.
Part Two: paras3-11 Main Ideas:
To be a good conversationalist, try listening! Be an attentive listener.
Part Three: para12 Main Ideas:
Remember that the people you are talking to are a hundred times more interested in themselves and their problems than they are in you and your problems. When someone shares information with, put yourself in his shoes. Doing this will allow the two of you to discover solutions more easily and will also help you appreciate a perspective different from your own. Diogenes， the Greek philosopher who is supposed to have lived in a barrel，said， “The reason why we have two ears and only one mouth is so that we may listen more and talk less！”
It never happened！ Here is some advice if you would like to be a good conversationalist: Be an attentive listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves. To be interesting， be interested! Ask questions that other people will enjoy answering. Encourage hem to talk about themselves and what they have done.
alone: adv. Without others present单独地， 独自地 e.g. She decided not to go alone. An elderly patient was sitting in her wheelchair alone.
come up to sth./sb. to approach sb. esp. to talk 走近某人 e.g. A man came up to him and asked for a light. When she came up to me after that third seminar I was so shocked and embarrassed that I could barely speak.