笑话一则作文
笑话一则
有三个探险爱好者去了食人族探险，被食人族族长抓住了。食人族族长说：“你们去找十个相同的水果，我就放了你们。”第一个人找了十个苹果回来，食人族族长让他塞到嘴里不然就吃掉他。第一个人塞到第五个时有痛苦的表情，于是被吃了。第二个人拿来十个草莓，塞到第九个的时候笑了，于是又被吃了。
短篇英语笑话10则带翻译
短篇英语笑话10则带翻译 ①Goldfish金鱼 Stan: I won 92 goldfish. Fred: Where are you going to keep them? Stan: In the bathroom 。 Fred: But what will you do when you want to take a bath? Stan: Blindfold（蒙眼睛）them! =================================================================== 斯丹：我赢了92 条金鱼。 弗雷德：你想在哪儿养它们？ 斯丹：浴室。 弗雷德：但是你想洗澡时怎么办？ 斯丹：蒙住它们的眼睛！ ②The Revenge 欺骗的代价 Old Farmer Johnson was dying. The family was standing around his bed. With a low voice he said to his wife: "When I'm dead I want you to marry farmer Jones." Wife: "No, I can't marry anyone after you." Johnson: "But I want you to." Wife: "But why?" Johnson: "Jones once cheated me in a horse deal!" =================================================================== 老农约翰逊就要死了。他的家人都站在床边。他声音低沉地对妻子说：“我死后，我想你嫁给农夫琼斯。” 妻子说：“不，在你死后，我不能嫁给任何人。” 约翰逊：“但我希望你这么做。” 妻子：“为什么？” 约翰逊：“因为琼斯曾在一笔贩马的交易中欺骗了我。” ③I think that I'm a chicken 我想我是一只鸡 Psychiatrist: What's your problem? Patient: I think I'm a chicken. Psychiatrist: How long has this been going on? Patient: Ever since I was an egg! =================================================================== 精神病医师：你哪里不舒服？ 病人：我认为我是一只鸡。 精神病医师：这种情况从什么时候开始的？ 病人：从我还是一只蛋的时候开始。 ④How do I get the gum out我怎么把口香糖取出来 Distributing chewing gum to the passengers, the stewardess explained it was to keep their ears from popping. When the plane landed, one of the passengers rushed up to her and said, "I'm meeting my wife right away. How do I get the gum out from my ears?" =================================================================== 当空中小姐给乘客们发口香糖的时候，她解释说口香糖有助于他们防止耳鸣。飞机着陆后，一位乘客跑到这位空中小姐面前，说道：“ 我马上就要见到我妻子了。我怎么才能把口香糖从耳朵里面取出来呢？”
爆笑笑话作文
爆笑笑话作文 一天深夜，一个年轻女子经过一家精神病院时，突然后面传来“哇”的一声。女子扭头一看，一个一丝不挂的男子正在向她追来。女子吓得拔腿就跑，后面的男人紧追不舍。不好，前面是一条死胡同，女子万念俱灰，跪在地上哭着哀求道:“你愿意干什么就干什么吧，只求你不要杀我。”男子狡黠地笑了笑说：“真的?那现在你开始追我。”有一家疯人院。一天，院长想看看有多少人病好了。就让护士在墙上画了扇大门儿。只见一个个病人都疯了一样的往墙上撞。院长很失望，忽然他看见只有一个病人无动于衷。院长很是高兴，忙跑过去问他：“难道你不想跟他们出去?病人答道：“这帮傻帽，我这儿有钥匙!” 精神病院里，有两位在交谈：“我的小说怎么样?”“不错，就是出场人数太多。”此时护士冲他们嚷道：“嘿，你们俩快把电话簿放回去。” 有一次我问我妈第一份工作是什么。老妈干脆的把另一难题“我是哪来的”给解决了。她的回答：“我以前是卖小孩的，你太丑了，卖都买不掉，只好自己养了。。。” 朋友的儿子读高二，有天晚上打电话给女同学，很不幸被女同学的母亲接到。正为女儿成绩下降的母亲一听是个男生，就非常警惕，很不悦地问道：“你姓什么?”男孩说：“我姓魏。”对方的语气很不客气：“魏什么?”男孩更紧张了，结结巴巴的回答：“我也不知道为什么，我爸爸也姓魏……”
开学换了一个新的化学老师，大家怀着期待的心情等了十几分钟，老师还没到，遂决定翻墙出校网吧打游戏，只见破旧的网吧里面只有一个人，于是上去搭讪：哥们，也出来玩啊。答曰：是啊。然后聊着聊着突然发现他也是逃的化学课，于是问之曰：你也讨厌化学啊，他淡定地回答：工资太少不想教了。 以前爷爷喜欢下棋，下不过邻居大爷，很苦闷，我就想替他报仇。私下找邻居大爷，他说让我，我说不要，打开手机里“象棋大师”，调到专家难度。大爷下一步我摁一步，机器人下一步我学一步。大爷都傻了，连输局，然后我就逃了。后来他居然找我拜师，说我是天才，一边玩手机都这么厉害，都不带想棋步的… 和朋友在qq上聊天：“人生有很多事是无法控制的。”“比如说呢?”“找找呀找呀找朋友，找到一个好朋友，敬个礼，握握手，你是我的好朋友。”“什么意思?”“你能控制住自己在读这段歌词的时候不在心里把它唱出来吗?” 那年头，菊花还是一种花的时候，我在作文里写道“老人的脸笑成了深秋里的一朵菊花”，还被老师当范文念了。那时候的我们是多么单纯啊! 某天就寝熄灯后，某同学心血来潮，站在寝室中间唱歌：“你说你，想要搞，偏偏不带避韵套，现在好，怀孕了，生下孩子你要不要。。。。。”(有需要者请参考张宇的用心良苦)整首歌都被来查房的班主任听到。 日本“最新的美容潮流”,花两个小时在额头注入100毫升生理盐水，然后用拇指持续按额头，由于额头需要-小时才能吸收完注射的盐水，在这段时间，额头将始终保持一个凹陷的深坑，这
七年级下册英语短文带中文翻译(1-12单元)
Unit 1 (sectionB 3a) Dear Student, My name is Bob . I live in Toronto , Canada , and I want a pen pal in China . I think China is a interesting country . I’m 14 years old and my brithday is in November . I can sperk English and a littie Frenth . I have a brother , Paul , and a sister , Sarah . They have pen pals in the United Kingdom and Australia . I like going to the movies with my friends and playing sports . My favorite subject in school is P.E . It’s fun . But I don’t like math. It’s too difficult! Can you wtite to me soon? Bob 亲爱的同学， 我的名字叫鲍勃，我住在加拿大的多伦多。我想在中国找个笔友。我认为中国是个非常有趣的国家。我十四岁，我的生日在九月。我能说英语和一点法语。我有一个哥哥 Paul, 和一个姐姐Sarah。他们在英国和澳大利亚有笔友。我喜 欢和我的朋友们看电影和做运动。在学校我最喜欢的科目是体育。它很有趣。但我不喜欢数学。它太难了。你能尽快给我写信吗 Bob 3b PEN PAL WANTED My name is Tom King . I’m 14 years old and I’m from Australia . I sperk English . I have a brother , Sam , and a sister , Lisa . I play soccer on weekengs . It’s my favorite sport . I like music at school . It’s fun! My favorite movte is The Long Weekend . Do you know it ? It’s an action movie . Please write and tell me about yoursrlf. 征集笔友 我的名字是汤姆~金。我14岁,我来自澳大利亚。我讲英语。我有一个哥哥, 萨姆,和一个妹妹,莉莎。我在周末踢足球，那是我最喜欢的运动。我喜欢学校的音乐课。它是有趣的!我最喜欢的电影是《这个长周末》。你知道它吗?它是一部动作片。 请写信给我,告诉我有关你的一些情况。 Unit 2 (sectionB 3a) Welcome to the Garden District Turn left on First Avenue and enjoy the city’s quiet streets and smail parks . Take a walk through the park on Center Avenue . Across from the park is an old hotel . Next to the hotel is a small house with an interesting garden . This is the benginning of the garden tour. 欢迎来到这个花园区 在第一大街左转并享受这个城市的安静街道和小公园。在中心大道上散步穿过这个公园。在公园对面是一个老旅馆。紧靠这个旅馆旁边是一个带着有趣花园的小房子。开始游历这个花园。
英语幽默笑话故事带翻译
英语幽默笑话故事带翻译 篇一：英语短文笑话(带翻译) 1、How much English can you speak? "Your Honor, I want to bring to your attention how unfair it is for my client to be accused of theft. He arrived in New York City a week ago and barely knew his way around. What's more, he only speaks a few words of English." The judge looked at the defendant and asked, "How much English can you speak?" The defendant looked up and said, "Give me your wallet!" 中文翻译 "法官先生，我的当事人被指控偷窃，这是多么不公正啊。他一周前才来到纽约，几乎不认路。而且，他只会说几个英语单词。" 法官看了看被告，问道："你会说多少英文？" 被告抬起头，说："把你的钱包给我！" 2 A husband, proving to his wife that women talk more than men, showed her a study which indicated that men use on average only 15000 words a day, whereas women use 30000 words a day. She thought about this for a while and then told her husband that women use twice as many words as men because they have to repeat everything they say. He said, "What?" 丈夫给妻子看了一项调查结果，为了向她证明女人比男人啰嗦。研究表明男人平均每天使用15000个字，而女人每天使用30000个。 妻子想了一会儿说，女人每天说的字数是男人的两倍，因为她们必须重复已经说过的话。他问："什么？" 3 Boy: Is this seat empty? Girl: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down. 男孩：这个座位是空的么？ 女孩：是的，如果你坐下，我的座位也将是空的。 4、 "Tom, what's the matter with your brother?" asked the mother in the kitchen. "He's crying." "Oh, nothing, Mum," replied Tom. "I'm eating my cake. He is crying because I won't give him any." "But has he finished his own cake?" "Yes." said Tom. "And he also cried when I was helping him finish that." "汤姆，你弟弟怎么了？" 妈妈在厨房里问。"他在哭。" "没事儿，妈妈，" 汤姆答道。"我在吃我的蛋糕。他哭是因为我不给他吃。" "他已经吃完自己的了么？" "是的。" "我帮他吃完时，他也哭了。"
讲笑话作文
讲笑话作文 作文一：讲笑话 中午，爸爸开车逞着我和妈妈、姜钧杰、汪阿姨去乡下吃饭。到了饭店，我看见许多叔叔和阿姨，只有我和姜钧杰、郭亦城三个小孩，我们分成二个厅，爸爸和叔叔们一个厅，妈妈和阿姨们、小孩一个厅。找好座位后，姜钧杰凑到我和郭亦城之间讲了个笑话：“一个外国老 奶奶到中国来玩，她不小心踩到中国老奶奶的脚，外国老奶奶说sorry，中国老奶奶火冒三丈'我刚洗过澡，头上不可能有馊味，你不胡说八 道啊！'”我们听了大笑起来。在吃饭的时候，有一个胖胖的叔叔到 我们这个厅来了，叔叔问郭亦城：“你爸帮你扎头怎么样？”郭亦城 瞅了一眼叔叔回答：“不怎样，帮我扎得乱七八糟。”叔叔笑着说：“那我帮你扎小辫，我扎得很不错。”她看都没看他：“你要扎帮颜海梅阿姨扎。”我们听了都仰天大笑，叔叔笑着走了。朱阿姨问郭亦城为什 么要扎就帮颜海梅阿姨扎呢，郭亦城看着朱阿姨说：“因为她的头发
比较短。”我们再一次仰天大笑。 作文二：讲笑话 今天吃过晚饭，我们全家一起坐在沙发上休息。妈妈便提仪说：“我们来讲笑话吧”。我和爸爸异口同声的说：“好啊”。 爸爸先讲了一个笑话是：有一个富人给一个农民一张纸条，纸条上写着‘中午牵头牛到我家’。那个农民不识字，但在富人面前装模作样地说：“好，我马上去你家”。笑话说完了，我和妈妈都忍不住哈哈大笑起来。 后面妈妈接着说：“蜘蛛有八条腿，有一天它不小心从树上掉了下来，你们说它还剩几条腿呢？”我抢着答：“还是八条。”妈妈笑着说：“错了错了，还剩七条，因为啊它还有一条腿正拍着胸说；‘唉呀妈呀吓死我了。’还没说完，我和爸爸就笑了起来。 最后轮到我讲：“有只狗向熊求婚，熊不肯答应的说：我才不跟你结婚呢，因为我不想生狗熊，我要和猫结婚，那样生出来的熊猫才珍贵
英语小笑话(带翻译)).
1 Boy: Is this seat empty? Girl: Yes and this one will be if you sit down. 男孩：这个座位是空的么？ 女孩：是的，如果你坐下，我的座位也将是空的。 2，Boy: Can I buy you a drink? Girl: Actually I'd rather have the money. 男孩：我可以给你买杯饮料吗？ 女孩：你不如直接把钱给我得了。 3. My little dog can't read Mrs. Brown: Oh, my dear, I have lost my precious little dog! Mrs. Smith: But you must put an advertisement in the papers! Mrs. Brown: It's no use, my little dog can't read. 我的狗不识字 布朗夫人：哦， 亲爱的，我把珍爱的小狗给丢了！ 史密斯夫人：可是你该在报纸上登广告啊！ 布朗夫人：没有用的，我的小狗不认识字。” 4. 反正我太太明天会来换的 My Wife Will Exchange Them A gentleman walks into a store and asked for a pair of gloves. ″Cloth or leather﹖″ asked the salesperson. ″Makes no difference″replied customer. ″What color﹖″ asked the clerk. ″Any″ he responded. ″Size﹖″ ″Give me whatever you prefer″ the gentleman said slightly exasper ated. ″My wife will be back tomorrow t o exchange them.″ 反正我太太明天会来换的 一位先生走进一家商店要买副手套。 “您是要布的还是皮的？”售货员问。
关于《笑话》的作文4篇
关于《笑话》的作文4篇 笑了一天又一天 实验小学六年二班孙凡迪 暑假前的一个月，我的同学“田大嫂”突然犯病了，一看见我就笑，这可不是笑一次两次了，而是一看见我就前仰后合地没个完。最后我终于忍受不了了，愤怒地吼道：“你为什么一看见我就笑呢？”田大嫂居然边笑边说：“我一看你那囧样我就想笑。”之后又嘻嘻地笑了起来。 从那以后，这个局面就控住不住了，以后不管什么场合，她一看到我脸就笑，到了后来，甚至一听到我的声音就笑，我这下就变成了一个笑话了。在“田大嫂”的影响下，全班所有女生一看见我就笑，我完完全全成了一个天大的笑话！不行，我一定要把这个被嘲笑的局面扭转一下，抵制住这场笑了一天又一天的风波。 于是，第二天上学，我看见我们班的女生硬装出严肃的样子，捧着个大猪肚子脸，就是没有笑模样，可是我这样无非是火上浇油，女生们的笑声越来越大，最后笑得连我也跟着笑了起来，于是你就听吧：哈哈哈……班级里全都是这样的笑声，大家笑了一天又一天…… 就这么笑着，终于笑到放暑假了。离开校园时，我不禁双手合一，默默祈祷起来：苍天啊！大地啊！快点让那场笑
的风波平息吧，我不想再当笑话了！ 教师评语：一个被班级女生嘲笑的男孩，一段儿时的荒唐经历。小作者将自己真实的经历，加上自己内心细腻的感受形成文字，给人一种儿时的纯真回忆。 笑话逃跑记 第三小学四年一班殷浩洋 今天，我写了一上午的作业，写完后，就随手打开了一本笑话书，打开一看，奇怪啊，上面的字怎么都没了？我又打开了一本，字也消失了，太恐怖了，这到底发生了什么？于是，我就想弄个究竟。 我跑到书柜边，又打开一本语文书，发现字迹还在，这么说我的眼睛没有病，书也没有病，可那些笑话书上的字到底怎么没了？这到底是怎么回事呢？ 为了探出个究竟，我又一次打开笑话书，并拿出一个放大镜来到了阳台，想在阳光充足的地方，看一看到底有什么蛛丝马迹？——太奇怪了，借着放大镜的光，我竟然发现几行字正以他们最快速度在逃生，我赶紧拿着滑板去追，一不小心就撞在了墙上，我着急地一边追一边喊道：“别跳，你们跑啥啊？等等我……”这时，只听见前面的一个字说：“哼，后面那人以为自己是打不死的小强呢！都撞成那样了，还在追我们……”“咚”的一声，我很不幸，又撞在了门上，可那些字到底机灵地从门缝逃出去了。我打开门，骑上滑板又
完整20篇初中英语小短文带翻译
1 Dogs People often say that a dog is man's best friend. Over thousands of years, man has taught his dogs to do many kinds of work besides guarding the home. For example, sheepdogs are famous for their ability to control a flock of hundreds of sheep. Dogs have been used to aid disabled people for centuries. A guide dog can lead its blind owner. Nowadays, dogs can be taught to turn on light switches, open refrigerator doors and dial the telephone for their disabled owners. For the majority of people, however, dogs are simply pets and friends for both young and old members of the family. guard 看守,看护sheepdog 牧羊犬flock 群aid 帮助 disabled 残疾人century 世纪guide dog 导盲犬dial 拨majority 大多数 狗 人们总是说狗是人类最好的朋友.几千年来,除了看家外,人类还教会了狗去做许多其他的事,例如,牧羊犬就因其可以控制数百只羊的羊群而出名. 狗用来帮助残疾人已有好几个世纪了.导盲犬可以为盲主人引路.现在,人们还教狗为残疾主人打 开电灯、开冰箱和拨电话.然而,对于大多数人来说,狗只是家里老人和孩子们的宠物和朋友. 2 Detective Work A bank robber stole a lot of money. He was caught and sent to prison, but the money was never found. When he came out of prison, they watched him to see what he would do. Here is the detective, reporting to the inspector. Yes, sir, I found Johnny . I followed him all around the town, but frankly, I couldn't make anything out of what he bought. Here's the list. shirt , heavy crowbar, box of chocolates , shovel, heavy hammer, bunch of flowers .The inspector said, Good. That helps me a lot. Do you remember how we watched him helping his neighbor, old Mrs. Judson to cover her backyard with cement? detective 侦探的侦探robber 强盗,盗贼prison 监狱 inspector 检察官frankly 坦白地,真诚地crowbar 铁撬,撬棒 shovel 铲,铁铲hammer 铁锤,锤子backyard 后院cement 水泥 侦探工作 一个盗贼从银行偷了很多钱.他被抓住送到监狱,但是钱没找到. 我发现了,先生,是的“侦探正向检察官报告：,这不.看他会做什么,他被监视,当他从监狱出来时．强尼?阿米塔基,我跟着他转遍了全镇,但坦白说,我不能从他买的东西中推断出什么.这里是清单.”衬衫、大铁撬、一盒巧克力铁铲、大铁锤、一束花. 检察官说：“好,这对我很有帮助.你还记得我们看到他是怎么帮他的邻居,贾德森老太太用水泥铺院子的吗?” 3 What is Time? （Nursery Rhyme） Time is grain for peasants. Time is wealth for workers.
超简短的5个英文笑话
超简短的5个英文笑话 1. Teacher: whoever answers my next question, can go home.老师：谁能回到我下一个问题，谁就可以回家了。 One boy throws his bag out the window. 一个小男孩把书包扔到窗外。 Teacher: who just threw that?! 老师：谁刚刚把书包扔出去了? Boy: Me! I’m going home now. 男孩：我!我现在要回家了。 2. What dog can jump higher than a building? 什么狗比大楼跳的还高?
Anydog, buildings can't jump! 任何一只狗，大楼又跳不起来。 3. What has a head, a tail, and no body?什么有头、有尾，但是没有身体? A coin! 硬币。 4. What has one eye but cannot see? 什么有一只眼睛，却看不见? A needle. 针。
5. Wife: "How would you describe me?" 妻子：你会怎么形容我呢? Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK." 丈夫：ABCDEFGHIJK. Wife: "What does that mean?" 妻子：那是什么意思? Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot." 丈夫：迷人的、魅力的、可爱的、令人愉悦的、优雅的、时髦的、漂亮的和火辣的。 Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"
英语幽默小故事10篇(带翻译)
英语幽默小故事10篇(带翻译) 线话英语|2016-03-14 17:03:05 英语幽默小故事10篇(带翻译)如下： Midway Tactics Three competing store owners rented adjoining shops in a mall. Observers waited for mayhem to ensue. The retailer on the right put up huge signs saying, "Gigantic Sale!" and "Super Bargains!" The store on the left raised bigger signs proclaiming, "Prices Slashed!" and "Fantastic Discounts!" The owner in the middle then prepared a large sign that simply stated, "ENTRANCE".
中间战术 三个互相争生意的商店老板在一条商业街上租用了毗邻的店铺。旁观者等着瞧好戏。 右边的零售商挂起了巨大的招牌，上书：“大减价!”“特便宜!” 左边的商店挂出了更大的招牌，声称：“大砍价!”“大折扣!” 中间的商人随后准备了一个大招牌，上面只简单地写着：“入口处”。 Very Pleased to Meet You During World War II, a lot of young women in Britain were in the army. Joan Phillips was one of them. She worked in a big camp, and of course met a lot of men, officers and soldiers. One evening she met Captain Humphreys at a dance. He said to her, "I’m going abroad tomorrow, but I‘d be very happy if we could write to each other." Joan agreed, and they wrote for several months. Then his letters stopped, but she received one from another officer, telling her that he had been wounded and was in a certain army hospital in England. Joan went there and said to the matron, "I‘ve come to visit Captain Humphreys." "Only relatives are allowed to visit patients here," the matron said. "Oh, that‘s all right," answered Joan. "I‘m his sister." "I‘m very pleased to meet you," the matron said, "I‘m his mother!" 在第二次世界大战中，有许多年轻的妇女在军营中服役。琼.飞利浦斯是其中之一。她在一个大军营中工作，当然遇到了许多男士，包括军官和士兵。
英语笑话带翻译短一些的
英语笑话带翻译短一些的 篇一：超简短的5个英文笑话 超简短的5个英文笑话1. Teacher: whoever answers my next question, can go home. 老师：谁能回到我下一个问题，谁就可以回家了。 One boy throws his bag out the window. 一个小男孩把书包扔到窗外。 Teacher: who just threw that?! 老师：谁刚刚把书包扔出去了? Boy: Me! I’m going home now. 男孩：我!我现在要回家了。 2. What dog can jump higher than a building? 什么狗比大楼跳的还高? Anydog, buildings can't jump! 任何一只狗，大楼又跳不起来。 3. What has a head, a tail, and no body? 什么有头、有尾，但是没有身体? A coin! 硬币。 4. What has one eye but cannot see? 什么有一只眼睛，却看不见? A needle. 针。 5. Wife: "How would you describe me?" 妻子：你会怎么形容我呢? Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK." 丈夫：ABCDEFGHIJK. Wife: "What does that mean?" 妻子：那是什么意思? Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot." 丈夫：迷人的、魅力的、可爱的、令人愉悦的、优雅的、时髦的、漂亮的和火辣的。 Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?" 妻子：哇，谢谢，但是“IJK”是什么意思呢? Husband: "I'm just kidding!"
简单幽默英语小故事及翻译
1 I Don?t Like Her Bob goes to a new school. One day he comes back, “Bob, do you like your new teacher?” his mother asks.“I don?t like her, Mother. Because first she says that three and three is six, and then she says that two and four is six, too.” 我不喜欢她 鲍勃的去了所新学校。 一天，他回到家，他妈妈问他：“你喜欢你的新老师吗？” “不，我不喜欢她，妈妈。因为她先说3加3等于6，然后她又说2加4等于6.” 2 Ten Candies Mother asks her son, “Jim, if you have ten candies, and you eat four, then how many candles do you have?” “Ten.” Jim says. “Ten？” Mother asks. Yes, Mum. Four candies are in my stomach and six candies are out of my stomach. Four and six is ten, isn?t it right?” 十块糖 妈妈问儿子：“吉姆，如果你有10块糖，吃了4块，那你还有几块糖？”“10块。”吉姆说。
“10块？”妈妈问。 “是的，妈妈。因为4块在我的肚子里面，6块在肚子外面，4加6等于10，不对吗？” 3 Where is the egg? Teacher: Can you make a sentence with the word "egg"? Student: Yes. I ate a piece of cake yesterday. Teacher: Then where is the “egg"? Student: In the cake, sir. 鸡蛋在哪里？ 老师：你能用“鸡蛋”一词造句吗？ 学生：可以。我昨天吃了一块蛋糕。 老师：“鸡蛋”在哪？ 学生：在蛋糕里，先生 4 Count Tomorrow Morning It?s a night. John is looking at the sky. Tom is John?s younger brother. He asks John “What are you doing?” John says, “I?m counting stars.” Tom laughs and says, “It?s really dark now. Why not count them tomorrow morning?” 明天早上数
英文小笑话(带中文翻译)
The mean man's party The notorious cheap skate finally decided to have a party. Explaining to a friend how to find his apartment, he said, "Come up to 5M and ring the doorbell with your elbow. When the door open, push with your foot." "Why use my elbow and foot?" "Well, gosh," was the reply, "You're not coming empty-hangded, are you?吝啬鬼请客 一个出了名的吝啬鬼终于决定要请一次客了。他在向一个朋友解释怎么找到他家时说：“你上到五楼，找中间那个门，然后用你的胳膊肘按门铃。门开了之后，再用你的脚把门推开。” “为什么要用我的肘和脚呢？” “你的双手得拿礼物啊。天哪，你总不会空着手来吧？”吝啬鬼回答。 I think that I'm a chicken Psychiatrist: What's your problem? Patient: I think I'm a chicken. Psychiatrist: How long has this been going on? Patient: Ever since I was an egg! 精神病医师：你哪里不舒服？ 病人：我认为我是一只鸡。 精神病医师：这种情况从什么时候开始的？ 病人：从我还是一只蛋的时候开始。 Who Is the Laziest? Father: Well, Tom, I asked to your teacher today, and now I want to ask you a question. Who is the laziest person in your class? Tom: I don't know, father. Father: Oh, yes, you do! Think! When other boys and girls are doing and writing, who sits in the class and only watches how other people work? Tom: Our teacher, father.
英语笑话100篇【简单易懂英语笑话阅读】
竭诚为您提供优质的服务，优质的文档，谢谢阅读/双击去除 英语笑话100篇【简单易懂英语笑话阅 读】 笑话是民族文化及社会生活中不可缺少的一环,从古至今都拥有广大的受众,深受人们喜爱。这其中的原因,不仅在于笑话能够折射出社会生活中的方方面面,而且在于,笑话可以在说笑中蕴含着人们对于美好生活的期盼和诉求。小编精心收集了简单易懂英语笑话，供大家欣赏学习! 简单易懂英语笑话篇1 Iwasoncetoldbyajapanesestudentthatthisisanoldstory.
onesaturdayafternoonthegrasshopper,thesnail,andthec entipedeweresittingaroundthegrasshopper'shousedrink ingbeer. Theyranoutofbeerbeforetheywerereadytoquitdrinking,s otheydecidedoneofthemshouldgooutformorebeer. Thesnailsaid,"I'dgo,butI'mkindofslow.besides,grassh opper,thisisyourneighborhoodsoyouknowwheretogo." Thegrasshoppersaid,"Idon'tmindgoing,butmyhoppingwil lshakeupthebeerandwe'llgetsprayedeverytimeweopenone ."
sotheydecidedtosendthecentipede;andthegrasshopperex plainedhowtogettothenearestliquorstore. Anhourorsopassedandstillthecentipedehadn'treturned, sothesnailandthegrasshopperdecidedtogolookforhim. Theygotasfarasthethefrontdoorandfoundthecentipedesi ttingthereputtingonhisshoes. submittedbyrodneyA.hoiseth-rothcorporation 简单易懂英语笑话篇2 Thisjokeneverfailstogetalaugh.
2019年英语笑话带翻译简短的
2019年英语笑话带翻译简短的 篇一：短篇英语笑话10则带翻译 短篇英语笑话10则带翻译 ①Goldfish金鱼 Stan:Iwon92goldfish. Fred:Whereareyougoingtokeepthem? Stan:Inthebathroom。 Fred:Butwhatwillyoudowhenyouwanttotakeabath? Stan:Blindfold（蒙眼睛）them! =========================================================== ========斯丹：我赢了92条金鱼。 弗雷德：你想在哪儿养它们？
斯丹：浴室。 弗雷德：但是你想洗澡时怎么办？ 斯丹：蒙住它们的眼睛！ ②TheRevenge欺骗的代价 OldFarmerJohnsonwasdying.Thefamilywasstandingaroundhisbed.W ithalowvoicehesaidtohiswife:"WhenI'mdeadIwantyoutomarryfarm erJones."Wife:"No,Ican'tmarryanyoneafteryou."Johnson:"ButIw antyouto."Wife:"Butwhy?"Johnson:"Jonesoncecheatedmeinahorse deal!" =========================================================== ========老农约翰逊就要死了。他的家人都站在床边。他声音低沉地对妻子说：“我死后，我想你嫁给农夫琼斯。”妻子说：“不，在你死后，我不能嫁给任何人。”约翰逊：“但我希望你这么做。”妻子：“为什么？”约翰逊：“因为琼斯曾在一笔贩马的交易中欺骗了我。”
英语笑话(带中文翻译)
1、How much English can you speak? "Your Honor, I want to bring to your attention how unfair it is for my client to be accused of theft. He arrived in New York City a week ago and barely knew his way around. What's more, he only speaks a few words of English." The judge looked at the defendant and asked, "How much English can you speak?" The defendant looked up and said, "Give me your wallet!" 中文翻译 "法官先生，我的当事人被指控偷窃，这是多么不公正啊。他一周前才来到纽约，几乎不认路。而且，他只会说几个英语单词。" 法官看了看被告，问道："你会说多少英文？" 被告抬起头，说："把你的钱包给我！" 2 A husband, proving to his wife that women talk more than men, showed her a study which indicated that men use on average only 15000 words a day, whereas women use 30000 words a day. She thought about this for a while and then told her husband that women use twice as many words as men because they have to repeat everything they say. He said, "What?" 丈夫给妻子看了一项调查结果，为了向她证明女人比男人啰嗦。研究表明男人平均每天使用15000个字，而女人每天使用30000个。 妻子想了一会儿说，女人每天说的字数是男人的两倍，因为她们必须重复已经说过的话。 他问："什么？" 3 Boy: Is this seat empty? Girl: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down. 男孩：这个座位是空的么？ 女孩：是的，如果你坐下，我的座位也将是空的。 4、 "Tom, what's the matter with your brother?" asked the mother in the kitchen. "He's crying." "Oh, nothing, Mum," replied Tom. "I'm eating my cake. He is crying