幽默英语演讲小短文(2分钟的)[1]1

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[英语演讲小短文幽默的]幽默英语演讲小短文

[英语演讲小短文幽默的]幽默英语演讲小短文幽默不分国界、不分民族。

然而不同国家与民族之间达到幽默共享却绝非易事。

小编整理了幽默的英语演讲小短文，欢迎阅读!幽默的英语演讲小短文篇一没把头发全剪掉啊miles sometime went to the barber’s during working hours to have his hair cut. but this was against the office rules: clerks had to have their hair cut in their own time. while miles was at the barber’s one day, the manager of the office came in by chance to have his own hair cut and sat just beside him.麦尔斯有时在上班时间去理发馆理发，但这是违反办公室规定的：职员只能利用自己的时间理发。

一天，正当麦尔斯理发时，经理碰巧也进来理发，而且就坐在他旁边。

”hello, miles,” the manager said. “i see that you are having your hair cut in office time.””你好，麦尔斯，”经理说。

”我看到你在上班时间理发了。

””yes, sir, i am,” admitted miles calmly. “you see, sir, it grows in office time.””是的，先生。

正是这样。

”麦尔斯平静地承认了。

”可先生，你看，头发是在上班时间长的。

””not all of it,” said the manager at once. “some of it grows in your own time.””不全都是吧，”经理立刻说，”有一些是在你自己的时间里长的。

幽默英语演讲稿范文(共6篇)

篇一：幽默英语演讲稿幽默英语演讲稿love your mother爱你的母亲why are you crying, a young boy asked his mom?你为什么哭?一个小男孩问他的妈妈.because im a woman, she told him.因为我是女人,她告诉他.i dont understand, he said.我不明白.他回答his mom just hugged him and said,and you never will, but thats o.k........妈妈拥抱了他说,你永远也不会明白,但没关系...later the little boy asked his father,why does mom seem to cry for no reason?.后来小男孩问他的父亲妈妈为什么似乎在无缘无故的哭泣?all women cry for no reason, was all his dad could say...... 所有的女人都会常常没有原因地哭泣,这是他的父亲唯一可以解释的...the little boy grew up and became a man,still wondering why women cry.等到小男孩长大,成了男人的时候,他仍然奇怪妈妈为什么哭.finally he put in a call to god and when god got back to him, he asked god, why do women cry so easily?最后他把这件事祷告给上帝,他问上帝,为什么女人容易哭泣?god answered......上帝回答:when i made woman,i decided she had to be special.i made her shouldersstrong enough to carrythe weight of the world, yet,当我创造女人的时候,我决定把她造的很特别,我让她的双肩强壮的足以能够承担整个世界,但是,却让她的双臂温柔的足够去安慰他人...i gave her the inner strengthto endure childbirthand the rejectioneven from her own children.我给她内在的力量去忍受生产的剧痛,也让她有勇气承受无数的伤害,甚至这些伤害有时会来自于自己的孩子...i gave her a hardnessthat allows herto keep going and take careof her family and friends,even when everyone else gives up, through sickness and fatigue without 我给她顽强,让她能够不断地前进,并且照顾自己的家人和朋友,甚至当每个人都放弃的时候,她却能够坚强地在疾病和劳累之时毫无怨言...i gave her the sensitivity to love her children under any and all circumstances. even when her child has hurt her badly....she has the very special power to make a childs boo-boo feel better and to quell a teenagers anxieties and fears....我给她内心的敏感,让她在任何环境下都深爱着自己的孩子.甚至在他们深深伤害她的时候．．．她用那特别的力量，让年幼孩子的在受伤的时候感到安慰，也能够让年轻的子女消除紧张与恐惧．．．i gave her strength to care for her husband, despite faults and i fashioned her from his rib to protect his heart....我给她力量关心她的丈夫，尽管他会犯错．我用男人的肋骨创造了女人，使女人可以保护男人的心脏．．．i gave her wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife, but sometimes tests her strengths and her resolve to stand beside him unfalteringly....我给她智慧，让她知道一个好丈夫永远不会伤害他的妻子，但有时候会试炼她坚定的永远跟随自己丈夫的能力与决心．for all of this hard work,i also gave her a tear to shed.it is hers to usewhenever needed andit is her only weakness....when you see her cry,tell her how much you love her, and all she does for everyone, and even though she may still cry, you will have made her heart feel good.因为这些种种的困难，我也同样赐她流下眼泪，这是当她在需要时可以使用的，这是她唯一的软弱之处．．．当你看到她哭泣的时候，告诉她你有多么地爱她，告诉她她为所有人所做的一切，即使这样她可能还是会哭泣，但你会使她的心里得到安慰．she is special!please send this to women you know, and those with mothers, sisters, and special women in their lives.她是独特的！请把这个信息传递给你认识的女人，有母亲，姐妹和特别的女性在他们生命里的人． but, also send this to men so they will understand about what a wonderful thing a woman is.each day is a mountain that must be climbed; with courage each stepgets easier.但是，也把这个信息传递给男人，因此他们会明白女人是多么奇妙的被造物．每一天，生活中都会有必须爬的山，但是勇气会使每一步都更轻松．love your mother always永远爱你的母亲，and keep her smiling并且使她微笑常在篇二：幽默英语演讲稿幽默英语演讲稿love your mother爱你的母亲why are you crying, a young boy asked his mom?你为什么哭?一个小男孩问他的妈妈.because im a woman, she told him.因为我是女人,她告诉他.i dont understand, he said.我不明白.他回答his mom just hugged him and said,and you never will, but thats o.k........妈妈拥抱了他说,你永远也不会明白,但没关系...later the little boy asked his father,why does mom seem to cry for no reason?.后来小男孩问他的父亲妈妈为什么似乎在无缘无故的哭泣?all women cry for no reason, was all his dad could say...... 所有的女人都会常常没有原因地哭泣,这是他的父亲唯一可以解释的... the little boy grew up and became a man,still wondering why women cry.等到小男孩长大,成了男人的时候,他仍然奇怪妈妈为什么哭.finally he put in a call to god and when god got back to him, he asked god, why do women cry so easily?最后他把这件事祷告给上帝,他问上帝,为什么女人容易哭泣? god answered......上帝回答:when i made woman,i decided she had to be special.i made her shouldersstrong enough to carrythe weight of the world, yet,当我创造女人的时候,我决定把她造的很特别,我让她的双肩强壮的足以能够承担整个世界,但是,却让她的双臂温柔的足够去安慰他人...i gave her the inner strengthto endure childbirthand the rejectioneven from her own children.我给她内在的力量去忍受生产的剧痛,也让她有勇气承受无数的伤害,甚至这些伤害有时会来自于自己的孩子...i gave her a hardnessthat allows herto keep going and take careof her family and friends,even when everyone else gives up, through sickness and fatigue without 我给她顽强,让她能够不断地前进,并且照顾自己的家人和朋友,甚至当每个人都放弃的时候,她却能够坚强地在疾病和劳累之时毫无怨言...i gave her the sensitivity to love her children under any and all circumstances. even when her child has hurt her badly....she has the very special power to make a childs boo-boo feel better and to quell a teenagers anxieties and fears....我给她内心的敏感,让她在任何环境下都深爱着自己的孩子.甚至在他们深深伤害她的时候．．．她用那特别的力量，让年幼孩子的在受伤的时候感到安慰，也能够让年轻的子女消除紧张与恐惧．．．i gave her strength to care for her husband, despite faults and i fashioned her from his rib to protect his heart....我给她力量关心她的丈夫，尽管他会犯错．我用男人的肋骨创造了女人，使女人可以保护男人的心脏．．．i gave her wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife, but sometimes tests her strengths and her resolve to stand beside him unfalteringly....我给她智慧，让她知道一个好丈夫永远不会伤害他的妻子，但有时候会试炼她坚定的永远跟随自己丈夫的能力与决心．for all of this hard work,i also gave her a tear to shed.it is hers to usewhenever needed andit is her only weakness....when you see her cry,tell her how much you love her, and all she does for everyone, and even though she may still cry, you will have made her heart feel good. 因为这些种种的困难，我也同样赐她流下眼泪，这是当她在需要时可以使用的，这是她唯一的软弱之处．．．当你看到她哭泣的时候，告诉她你有多么地爱她，告诉她她为所有人所做的一切，即使这样她可能还是会哭泣，但你会使她的心里得到安慰．she is special!please send this to women you know, and those with mothers, sisters, and special women in their lives.她是独特的！请把这个信息传递给你认识的女人，有母亲，姐妹和特别的女性在他们生命里的人． but, also send this to men so they will understand about what a wonderful thing a woman is.each day is a mountain that must be climbed; with courage each step gets easier.但是，也把这个信息传递给男人，因此他们会明白女人是多么奇妙的被造物．每一天，生活中都会有必须爬的山，但是勇气会使每一步都更轻松． love your mother always永远爱你的母亲，and keep her smiling并且使她微笑常在篇三：新初中幽默英语演讲稿新初中幽默英语演讲稿love your mother爱你的母亲why are you crying, a young boy asked his mom?你为什么哭?一个小男孩问他的妈妈.because im a woman, she told him.因为我是女人,她告诉他.i dont understand, he said.我不明白.他回答his mom just hugged him and said,and you never will, but thats o.k........妈妈拥抱了他说,你永远也不会明白,但没关系...later the little boy asked his father,why does mom seem to cry for no reason?.后来小男孩问他的父亲妈妈为什么似乎在无缘无故的哭泣?all women cry for no reason, was all his dad could say......所有的女人都会常常没有原因地哭泣,这是他的父亲唯一可以解释的...the little boy grew up and became a man,still wondering why women cry.等到小男孩长大,成了男人的时候,他仍然奇怪妈妈为什么哭.finally he put in a call to god and when god got back to him, he asked god, why do women cry so easily?最后他把这件事祷告给上帝,他问上帝,为什么女人容易哭泣?god answered......上帝回答:when i made woman,i decided she had to be special.i made her shouldersstrong enough to carrythe weight of the world, yet,当我创造女人的时候,我决定把她造的很特别,篇四：英语演讲幽默开场白英语演讲幽默开场白作为一个演讲者，我从观众那只得到过两种抱怨：一种是我讲话声音太大了，他们无法入睡；第二种是我讲得时间太长了，他们无法一直清醒。

2分钟幽默英文自我介绍（精选16篇）

2分钟幽默英文自我介绍（精选16篇）2分钟幽默英文自我介绍（精选16篇）当来到的一个陌生的.地方时，我们时常会需要作自我介绍，自我介绍可以拉近我们与陌生人的关系。

如何写出一个与众不同的自我介绍？下面是小编精心整理的2分钟幽默英文自我介绍，希望能够帮助到大家。

2分钟幽默英文自我介绍篇1Hello, my name is xx, it is really a great honor to have this opportunity for a interview, i would like to answer whatever you may raise, and i hope i can make a good performance today, eventually enroll in this prestigious university in september.Now i will introduce mybesides, i have attend several xhold in x, this is our advantage study here, i have taken a tour to some big factory and company. through these i have a deeply understanding of domestic x industry. compared to developed countries such as us, unfortunately, although we have made extraordinary progress since x,our x industry are still underdeveloped, mess, unstable, the situation of employees in this field are awkard. but i have full confidence in a bright future if only our economycan keep the growth pace still. i guess you maybe interested in the reason itch to law, and what is myplan during graduate study life, i would like to tell you that is one of mylifelong goal,i like mymajor x and i wont give up,if i can pursue mymaster degree here i will combine law with myformer education.I am able to work under great pressure. Thanks for the chance.2分钟幽默英文自我介绍篇2Hello, my name is Leo. Im from. Zhengxin school. As you cansee I have a round face and the big eyes. I like music very much. In my spare time, I like take some reading and go shopping. It can make me feel happy. I like chatting with others, because it can help me to know this world. I have lots of friends. All the things in the world are colorful. I love peace and I take proud of my motherland. Thank you!2分钟幽默英文自我介绍篇3Hello,everyone. Now please allow me to do an introduction.My name is Li Lei. Im 14 year old. My birthday is on October 11th. My favourite book is twilight. I really love to read the books about vampires. My hobby is singing. Some people say Im a good singer.My favourite singer is Justin Biber.I think he is a great singer. I love to sing his songs. Besides singing, I love shopping very much. If I have time, I will go shopping with my friends.Im really good at English, if you have any questions, you can ask me, I will do my best to help you.We can be the best friends forever. Thank you.2分钟幽默英文自我介绍篇4I am honored to have the opportunity to stand here for an interview. I hope to show my personal basic situation to my teachers through the interviewMy name is XX, XX years old this year, from XX high school in XX middle school. I worked as a XX job in high school, and students get along very well. My hobby is XX, because XXXX; my extracurricular interest is XX, because XXXX. XXXX. my advantage is my ideal is to become a good XX, because XXXX.If I can be admitted, I will use in the school for three years, hard to learn professional knowledge, practice skills, and strive to the professionals, to continue to higher college, a national community useful person in the future, hope that the examinergave me this opportunity, thank you.2分钟幽默英文自我介绍篇5I am cheerful, and his careful, meticulous work, hard working, down to earth work, there is a strong sense of responsibility, team spirit, but also has a strong ability to work independently, active thinking.Able to skillfully use Windows Office Word, Excel, XXX and other applications, according to the needs of XXX, the completion of the work surface XXXX, XXXX have a good sense of communication skills and strong negotiation skills;Professional advice and product and supplier information in XXXX, the proposed feasibility recommendations, follow XXXX solve the problem; have team spirit, a sense of responsibility, good character, correct thinking; have a certain file management capabilities.2分钟幽默英文自我介绍篇6Good morning everyone,my name is XX,and my english name is XX. Iam 21 years old and iam from (qingdao/XX) . I have very happy family, they were my mother,my father and i. my father is soldier and my mother is doctor .i love them verymuch,we leave very luckly everyday!I have some interests, four example: play piano singsong ang swimming.I have lend so much from them.when i was young, i haved a dream, i was dreaming flying in the sky, so ,i long to work in the plain. then, iam here,i weash you would take me, because iam looking four would, to working four(china easten airlines),nice meeting you again. thank you ! 2分钟幽默英文自我介绍篇7Good morning/afternoon. It is really my honor to have this opportunity for a interview. I hope I can make a goodperformance today.My name is xx. I am 20 years old，born in a little village in Southern Zhejiang. My parents are farmers,and I am the only child. Though not well-to-do，the family always be hopeful. My major is engineering technology. I will graduate in July，20xx. I have some hobbies like listening to music，swimming，and especially seeing western movies. In the passed two years，I have learned some practical skills and gained some major certificates.I paid more attention to learn Engling，and I have passed CET4 in my efforts. I am looking forward to becoming a member of your company . Thankyou!2分钟幽默英文自我介绍篇8Hello, everyone. My name is Kelly. I am friendly and honest.I am good at English and maths. I like surfing the internet,playing computer games, watching TV and traveling. I also like playing table tennis and I am good at it ,too. I often play table tennis with my friends on weekends.And I want to be a famous table tennis player when I grow up. What I like most is to see the seagulls flying freely in the sky so I often go to the sea in summer. My favourite colour is white because I think white is symbolize purity.2分钟幽默英文自我介绍篇9Good morning, my name is jack, it is really a great honor to have this opportunity for an interviepany in September.Noe big factories and companies. Through these I have a deeply understanding of domestic packaging industry. Compared to developed countries, unfortunately, although y can keep the grobine practice etimes I prefer to stay alone, reading, listening to music, but i am not lonely, i like to chat e from Zhe Jiang,and I'm an outgoing girl,I like philosophy and sport.Oh yes,Ihope that I can do something for the Beijing Olympics.If you give me the great chance,I XXXX college.The profession is a calculator multimedia.I am one is bright, optimism, there is the person of responsibility.A fondness for plays basketball, computer, listen to music, etc..Thankful your company gives me this the opportunity of the personal interviepany. I’m 22 years old and in good health. After graduation from XXXXa middle school, I have studied IT for many years. I am a better man.Do pany. I’ll pany. 2分钟幽默英文自我介绍篇10Good morning,my dear classmates and teacher.It's my great honor to introduce myself to you here.My name is XX,I'm from No.X middle school.I'm a XXyear-old boy/gir.Generally speaking, I am a hard e sports.So,I ething neething nee from DLUFL and my major is english special lised in business.Computer, books, films and climbing moutains are my favourite.I have been a class president for nearly 4 years, and I also have been an interpreter at Dalian Garment Fair for tputer is HP, so I have a better e from xxxxxx,the capital of xxxxxxxProvince. I graduated from the xxxxxx department of xxxxxUniversity in July ,20XX.In the past tments in the forum on line.In addition ,during my college years,I parative good command of netputer mand of advance xxxxxx.2分钟幽默英文自我介绍篇11My name is Liyuanyuan. I'm a boy and I am 12 yeas old, there are 4 people in my family. My father is a Chemistry teacher. He teaches chemistry in Zhengxin senior high school.My mother is a Chinese teacher. She teaches Chinese in the university. I have an elder brother; he is a junior middle school student and is preparing for the entrance exam. I'm tall and I havea pair of big eyes. Now, I am in Grade 5, my study is not very good, but I like English, so my English is better than others.I like singing, drawing, playing basketball. I like to read English story books in my free time. Sometimes I surf the Internet and download the English study materials. Because it also enlarges my vocabulary words. I think one day I can master English. Thank you.2分钟幽默英文自我介绍篇12Hello, everyone, my name is JIMMY, I am five.I have white skin and I'm smart. In our kindergarten ,I like to play with children and like our teacher teaching us to recite the “University”.I also like to have a trip with my parents.I have gone to sea islands in Malaysia for two times.I found that if you learn English well, you can make friends and swim with foreign children from different colors.You can also tell your grandmother “ this is called AIRPLANE ”when you get on it.You can say ICECREAM to the salesman when you want to eat it. When you feel sick you can tell the doctor which part of your body is not comfortable.We can also introduce beautiful places in China to foreigners. English is very interesting and useful, please join us to learn English.2分钟幽默英文自我介绍篇13I am a kind, beautiful, lively, cheerful, confident, cute, love the girls a freak, my name is ... to not tell you that I am nine years old, is a "nice little Rose for Emily" oh!I love to laugh, like fixing a pair of pigtail, long a pair of water Lingling small eyes, a silver tongue, big mouth, I like to make friends, whether male or female, and regardless of your results good or bad, and I will be with you happy to play.I can be more loving, singing, dancing, piano, English ... myfavorite is still singing, my strengths a little more like the stars, the biggest thing I like learning, like reading, so I tell stories is oK.I also have drawbacks, is my temper very pungent, in boys, but a tomboy in me, because I hit them at every turn. (But the joke that I have never played them cry.)2分钟幽默英文自我介绍篇14name is Vencent. I’m a boy .I’m nine years old. I’m from Ruian xincheng Experimentation primary school.I’m in Class three Grade four. I’m clever. I’m a good boy. I’m helpful. I often help classmates. My best friend is Caichenglai. He’s nine years old too. We eat play and read together. We learn each other.I like swimming,roller-skating and computer games.I swim everyday，in the summer holiday.I ofen roller-skating on the weekend.I like blue and red .I like the blue sky. I like the red auturm .There are three people in my family. They are my mother my father and I. My mother is thirty-seven years old. She’s an accountant. She likes to go travelling. My father is thirty-seven years old too. He is a teacher. He likes to reed books.2分钟幽默英文自我介绍篇15Hello! My name is xx years old, from xx. In June this year, graduated from xx normal college, major in marketing, I work in the inhua Bookstore outlets, have certain experience to serve their customers.Good English foundation, has acquired the university English level Four certificate, also in foreign trade practice company. I pursue attitude decides everything principle, I believe that as long as get down to every detail, good customer service, through their own unremitting efforts, will be in with excellent performance.I would like to apply for the position of xx in your company.I want to make full use of what I have learned and study and grow here. I hope I can have the opportunity to become colleagues with you2分钟幽默英文自我介绍篇16good morning. my name is chen guangwen, i am going to graduate from qingdao technological university in july, 2009. my major is industrial engineering. this summer i got a (good) opportunity to work at foxconn as a trainee. i practiced what i learnt from the school (my major), i also learnt how to communicate,cooperate to others and work scrupulosity . it was a very important lesson that i could not learnt from the school. may be it sound funny, actually, i apply the idea of industrial engineering in my daily life, i manage my time effectively, i know how to make things work efficiently, i have a very good arrangement ability, i usually have a plan for everything. from life at university, i learn how to balance study and entertainment.。

英文口语2分钟演讲（精选13篇）

英文口语2分钟演讲（精选13篇）英文口语2分钟演讲篇1If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.It hurts to love someone and not be loved in return. But what is more painful is to love someone and never find the courage to let that person know how you feel.英文口语2分钟演讲篇2What is One Breath EnglishDear ladies and gentlemen:Thank you for the warm welcome. It's an honor to be here today. I'm here on a mission. I have an important message. I'm convinced it will change your life. English is everywhere. English is a key to success. We must learn and master it.So many of us study English like hell. So few of us can speak it well. What do you think is the reason? The problem is right here! The problem is remembering. The problem is that we forget what we learn.Luckily , through years of research ,we've created a new way to learn . With this specially designed material and method, we can retain what we learn forever. It's called One Breath English.What is One Breath English? Why shall we learn it, what it all about?First, it's a breakthrough technique. It's easy to remember. It's designed to be memorized. Repeat nine lines like crazy. Speak as fast as you can. Say it within five seconds. It will become second nature. It will be ingrained in your memory. You will remember it for the rest of your life.Second, the material is full of life. It's not boring book English. It's the core essence of daily American speech. The content is uplifting. It's considerate and polite. People will like what you say. You'll gain confidence. You'll communicate better. You'll become a better person.Third, it's fun to learn. It's a five second test. It's just like playing a game. You challenge yourself. You race against the clock. You will improve every time you try. Speak English to yourself day and night. Speak English to everyone around you. It's fun to impress people.Fourth, One Breath English is very healthy. It's a fountain ofyouth. It will make you become younger. What makes people grow old? It's anxiety, stress and loss of hope. Reciting English will cure these problems. Chant it over and over. Say it to yourself again and again. Your anxiety, depression and loneliness will all go away.The bottom line is that One Breath English gets results. It's organized and systematic. This is a great discovery. It's totally revolutionary. It's unprecedented in language learning history. The English revolution is NOW! One Breath English is the way. Let's open our books and begin.英文口语2分钟演讲篇3The footsteps of the 20xx world expo is getting closer and closer to us, civilized and harmonious call is still ringing in my ears. shanghai, china obtained the right to host the world expo 20xx, expo 20xx shanghai china will be a world event, the development of shanghai's new round of golden opportunity, as it is an important embodiment of our national spirit.World expo is a great influence and a long history of international activities, is the largest gathering of human beings. people from around the world gathered in one place display their products and skills, boast of their hometown and motherland. expo set the culmination of human civilization, which has a unique appeal, make you feel surging.World expo is a platform, we are the masters. she put up a platform for us to let the world know us; she built a bridge for us, so we better communicate with the world. this platform may let us display self wantonly. we are the masters here, we have to landlord, let guest experience enthusiasm and happiness.Everyone to contribute for the expo, we are no exception, as a living piece of fertile land in pudong's teachers, we are proudand pride. in the vision of a better tomorrow, we have to do for the world expo will own a wonderful ability, we have through our hands, warm heart and sincerity to practical action to achieve the commitment of shanghai to the world. we should educate the many students: do not throw garbage anywhere, no spitting, no jaywalking … …，hello, thank you frequently mention, let the material on this city with the new york comparable to the spiritual civilization. educate our students to exciting 20xx, willing to shanghai's future by copies of power, if only planted a small tree, participants in the shanghai world expo foreign guests feel: this is a forest city, pollution-free city, ancient and civilized city. better city, better life! until the time of the 20xx expo, then, we want to become a glorious volunteers, to changing our foreign friends in shanghai and china's long history, about our education for the world expo will contribute their efforts.We expect the majority of teachers will be great enthusiasm for the world expo into practical action to meet the world expo, the expo will be a total growth, and the city of development, the development of shanghai devote their efforts to advance hand in hand with shanghai.英文口语2分钟演讲篇4the first time i saw bao was in , the year when thomas and uber cup was held. at that time he was playing against li zongwei, who is also a good player from malaysia. bao beat him. to tell the truth, at first the reason why i liked him was just because i thought he was pretty.*(maybe it is not a suitable word, but i think no better word can describe him, he is really pretty!) from that time, i have focused on him. then gradually, i found that he not only has good appearance, but also has a talent for badminton.he is very tall, about 1.90 meters. he is the tallest one among all the players in the chinese badminton team. in , he is chosen as the flag holder stands for china in the opening ceremony in the 15th asian games held in doha. it was the first time that the badminton players were chosen to take over the special task, before which time, it belonged to the basketball players. it was a great honor. and it also proved that bao was an excellent athlete. we are all proud of him.he began to play badminton when he was at primary school. in , he won his first good medal, which was significant to him, in guangzhou. because of that, he entered the chinese badminton team. as he is as old as lin dan, who is the top one in the world, he is always put into a situation wh(。

幽默搞笑的英语演讲稿范文（通用6篇）

幽默搞笑的英语演讲稿幽默搞笑的英语演讲稿范文（通用6篇）演讲稿是一种实用性比较强的文稿，是为演讲准备的书面材料。

在现在的社会生活中，演讲稿对我们的作用越来越大，那么你有了解过演讲稿吗？以下是小编收集整理的幽默搞笑的.英语演讲稿范文（通用6篇），希望能够帮助到大家。

幽默搞笑的英语演讲稿1Dear teachers and schoolmates:I’m very happy to give a lecture in English here today. The title of speech is I Love English. As everyone knows,English is very important today.It has been used everywhere in the world.It has become the most common language on Internet and for international trade. If we can speak English well,we will have more chance to succeed.Because more and more people have taken notice of it,the number of the people who go to learn English has increased at a high speed. But for myself,I learn English not only because of its importance and its usefulness,but also because of my love for it.When I learn English, I can feel a different way of thinking which gives me more room to touch the world.When I read English novels,I can feel the pleasure from the book which is different from reading the translation.When I speak English, I can feel the confident from my words.When I write English,I can see the beauty which is not the same as our Chinese… I love English,it gives me a colorful dream.I hope I can travel around the world one day. With my good English, I can make friends with many people from different contries.I can see many places of great intrests.I dream that I can go to London,because it is the birth place of English. I also want to use my good English to introduce our great places to the English spoken people,I hopethat they can love our country like us.I know, Rome was not built in a day. I believe that after continuous hard study, one day I can speak English very well. If you want to be loved, you should learn to love and be lovable. So I believe as I love English everyday , it will love me too. I am sure that I will realize my dream one day! Thank you!幽默搞笑的英语演讲稿2Good morning/afternoon!First thing first, I gotta say,wow,its funny thing to be given a chance like that.Trurh be told,I really got a little bit nervous before I stand right here ,so called stage fright.If you look specifically on me .You may find my hands shaking,pretty assembles the guy who suffered from Pakinsons disease,and legs wobbling ,like I caught so-called ball leg. Okay,lets stop going around the bush and get back to my topic today.I really like to talk a funny story I have just heard.A lady called Lucy emigrated to United States several years ago.Her spoken English is not that fluent .And one day,she is just sitting on the couch with his U.S friends Mandy watching Sit-Com.A noise of bump had the attention of Mandy,which led her to go out of the house trying to figure out what had happened.Can you imagine that Mandy go straight out with merely a sweater.So Lucy shouted at her,"Lucy ,turn your clothes on." What suprised her most,beyond her wildest imagination, is that almost all the male in this country took their head out of the window.Admittedly,Lucy made a mistake here .The word spitted means Mandy is totally naked to the reason that male looked out of the window.The right sentence shall be,"put your clothing on."The story inspires you to take a careful look on the vast difference between eastern and western culture.Thats full of it,thank you for your time!幽默搞笑的英语演讲稿3Good evening ,Ladies and Gentlemen:Thank you very much for choosing to come in such a cold night.Today my topic is about choice and process.A research shows that a man has to make 73 choices one day.With so many choices one day, people easily get so confused and afraid of making wrong choice that they hesitate and finally miss the true part of life. In my opinion, the following part is of much more importance than the choice. There is no absolute right or wrong choice but wonderful or boring life, which the process makes the difference.Life is a box of chocolate,you never know what you will get. Forrest Gump made no decision by and for himself but he accomplished great success with his strong will in the process. The process is not the road itself but the attitudes and feelings ,the caution, courage and persistance we have as we encounter new experience and unexpected obstacles. Take myself as an example, I changed my major when I became a postgraduate. After the choice,days have been harsh for me.I cannot understand the new lessons at all. For they are closely related to mathmatics which I learned nothing about before. However wuth the belief that this is the great chance for me to experience new ideas and challenge myself,I persisted. I asked for help from every channel and reorgonized my life. Gradually I could understand some parts and even found maths interesting.Moreover, I learned to act instead of complaining. In retrospect,the choice left no trace in my mind but the happiness and bitterness of the past four months becomes an unforgetable experience in my life.No matter what the choice is, enjoy the process. In the process, your potential will be inspired and new discoveries,improvement and progress will come to you. These are the most beautiful sceneries and only on the way can you see it.These make your life colorful.There is no need and I donnot want to judge whether it right or wrong for me to be here,but I congratulate to myself for I gain and enjoy this fantastic experience. So my dear friends,never worry about your choice and enjoy the process. I am sure you will get something new and intersting tonight after you chose to come here.Thank you!幽默搞笑的英语演讲稿4Mary was an English girl, but she lived in Rome. She was six years old. Last year her mother said to her, “You’re six years old now, Mary, and you’re going to begin going to a school here. You’re going to like it very much, because it’s a nice school.”“Is it an English school” Mary asked.” Yes, it is,” her mother said. Mary went to the school, and enjoyed her lessons. Her mother always took her to school in the morning and brought her home in the afternoon. Last Monday her mother went to the school at 4 o’clock, and Mary ran out of her class. “We’ve got a new girl in our class today, Mummy,” she said. “She’s six years old too, and she’s very nice, but she isn’t English. She’s German.” “Does she speak English” Mary’s mother asked.” No, but she laughs in English,” Mary said happily.幽默搞笑的英语演讲稿5Ladies and Gentlemen , Good afternoon! I68m very glad tostand here and give you a short speech. today my topic is “youth”. I hope you will like it , and found the importance in your youth so that more cherish it.First I want to ask you some questions: 1、Do you know what is youth? 2、 How do you master your youth?YouthYouth is not a time of life, it is a state of mind it is not rosy cheeks , red lips and supple knees, it is a matter of the emotions : it is the freshness it is the freshness of the deep springs of life .Youth means a temperamental predominance of courage over timidity of the appetite , for adventure over the love of ease. This often exists in a man of 60 more than a boy of 20 . Nobody grows old merely by a number of years . We grow old by deserting our ideals.Years wrinkle the skin , but to give up enthusiasm wrinkles the soul . Worry , fear , self –distrust bows the heart and turns the spirit back to dust .Whether 60 of 16 , there is in every human being 67s heart the lure of wonders, the unfailing childlike appetite of what68s next and the joy of the game of living . In the center of your heart and my heart there68s a wireless station : so long as it receives messages of beauty , hope ,cheer, courage and power from men and from the infinite, so long as you are young .When the aerials are down , and your spirit is covered with snows of cynicism and the ice of pessimism, then you are grown old ,even at 20 , but as long as your aerials are up ,to catch waves of optimism , there is hope you may die young at 80.That68s all ! Thank you!幽默搞笑的英语演讲稿6Earn english not only because of its importance and itsusefulness,but also because of my love for it.when i learn english, i can feel a different way of thinking which gives me more room to touch the world.when i read english novels,i can feel the pleasure from the book which is different from reading the translation.when i speak english, i can feel the confident from my words.when i write english,i can see the beauty which is not the same as our chinese...I love english,it gives me a colorful dream.i hope i can travel around the world one day. with my good english, i can make friends with many people from different contries.i can see many places of great intrests.i dream that i can go to london,because it is the birth place of english.I also want to use my good english to introduce our great places to the english spoken people,i hope that they can love our country like us.I know, rome was not built in a day. i believe that after continuous hard study, one day i can speak english very well. if you want to be loved, you should learn to love and be lovable. so i believe as i love english everyday , it will love me too.I am sure that i will realize my dream one day!Thank you!。

简单的英语幽默演讲稿2分钟范文

简单的英语幽默演讲稿2分钟范文演讲，首先要了解听众，注意听众的组成，了解他们的性格、年龄、受教育程度、出生地，分析他们的观点、态度、希望和要求。

掌握这些以后，就可以决定采取什么方式来吸引听众，说服听众，取得好的效果。

下面小编就同大家聊聊关于英语演讲稿，希望有所帮助！简单的英语幽默演讲稿2分钟1Honorable Judges， fellow students：Good afternoon!Recently， ther is a heated debate in our society. The college students are the beneficiaries of a rare privilege， who receive e__ceptional education at e__traordinary places. But will we be able to face the challenge and support ourselves against all odds? Will we be able to better the lives of others? Will we be able to accept the responsibility of building the future of our country?The cynics say the college students are the pampered lost generation， which would cringe at the slightest discomfort. But the cynics are wrong. The college students I see are eagerly learning about how to live independently. We help each other clean the dormitory， go shopping and bargain together， and take part time jobs to supplement our pocket money.The cynics say we care for nothing other than grades; and we neglect the need for character cultivation. But again， the cynics are wrong. We care deeply for each other， we cherish freedom，we treasure justice， and we seek truth. Last week， thousands of my fellow students had their blood type tested in order to make a contribution for the children who suffer from blood cancer.As college students，we are adolescents at the critical turning point in our lives. We all face a fundamental choice：cynicism or faith， each will profoundly impact our future， or even the future of our country. I believe in all my fellow classmates. Though we are still ine__perienced and even a little bit childish. I believe that we have the courage and faith to meet any challenge and take on our responsibilities. We are preparing to assume new responsibilities and tasks，and to use the education we have received to make our world a better place. I believe in our future.thank you!简单的英语幽默演讲稿2分钟2good evening ，ladies and gentlemen：thank you very much for choosing to e in such a cold night。

关于英语笑话对话演讲稿

关于英语笑话对话演讲稿笑话是日常生活中常见的一种幽默。

与一般日常会话不同,笑话刻意违反合作原则,由此衍生出会话含意,并利用会话含意之间的冲突实现其预定功能。

小编精心收集了关于英语笑话对话演讲稿，供大家欣赏学习!关于英语笑话对话演讲稿篇1Henry was from the United States and he had come to London for a holiday.亨利是个美国人，他到伦敦来度假。

One day he was not feeling well, so he went to the clerk at the desk of his hotel and said,"I want to see doctor. Can you give me the name of a good one?"有一天他感到身体不舒服，于是走到旅馆服务台对服务员说:“我想看病，你能给我推荐一位好医生吗?”The clerk looked in a book and then said , "Dr. Kenneth Grey , 61010."服务员查阅了一下本子，然后说:“肯尼思·格雷医生，61010。

"Henry said，"Thank yon very much. Is he expensive?"亨利说:“非常感谢，他收费贵吗?”"Well, "the clerk answered, "he always charges his patients two pounds for their first visit to him, and one pound and 50 pennies for later visits."“喔，”服务员回答说:“他对初诊患者收费两英镑，复诊收费一点五英镑。

幽默英文演讲

幽默英文演讲幽默英文演讲4篇幽默英文演讲1Hi everybody, my name is XXX, and I'm 17 years old.As far as I know, no kid loves studying, and I'm surely not eXceptional to that. ”我喜欢外的其他学科”什么意思? I know English learing is quite important, but I was born lazy and there is no way to change it. My biggest hobby is taking naps in classes, and I really hate being awaken when I'm sound asleep. I would appreciate it if you guys won't wake me up when I fall asleep. Thank you幽默英文演讲2hello everyone!my name is king, a student from college. i am glad to give you a speech about my college. the title of my speech is my college, my home.last september i left my hometown with heavy baggage and after a journey of ten hours, i came to this dream campus with great expectation and excitement.whenever i recall the past days, so many thoughts are flooding in my mind. but what impressed me most is a night when i got a stomachache during the first days. i had to turn to the aunts in charge of our dormitory for help. they were so friendly and warm-hearted. they gave me the pills and reminded me of having more hot water. i recovered soon and i thanked them from the bottom of my heart because they brought me the warmth of home.our college is a famous academic center. the teaching staff are all learned professors. many of them are world-wide known for their wide range of knowledge and charming personality. irespect my teachers! i admire my teachers! i love my teachers! various activities are carried here. they not only bring me happiness but also improve myself. i meet with a lot of classmates and make a large number of friends. when i feel upset, the will give me a hand; when i am happy, i will share with them. the library has a large collection of books and i always lose myself in it. i believe they will benefit me a lot and are to broaden the roads of my future.i love you,college! you are just a place which gives me warmth and strengths! you are my home!幽默英文演讲3Man's life is a process of growing upMan's life is a process of growing up,actually I'm standing here is a growth.If a person's life must constituted by various choices,then I grow up along with these choices.Once I hope I can study in a college in future,however that's passed,as you know I come here,now I wonder what the future holds for (= what will happen to) me.When I come to this school,I told to myself:this my near future,all starts here.Following I will learn to become a man,a integrated man,who has a fine body,can take on important task,has independent thought,an open mind,intensive thought,has the ability to judge right and wrong,has a perfect job.Once my teacher said :” you are not sewing,you are stylist; never forget which you should lay out to people is your tho ught,not craft.” I will put my personality with my interest and ability into my study,during these process I will combine learning with doing.If I can achieve this “future”,I think that I really grow up.And I deeply believe kindred,good-fellowship and love will perfection and happy in the future.How to say future?Maybe it's a nice wish.Lets make up our minds,stick to it and surely wellenjoy our life.幽默英文演讲4good morning everyone.my name is zhang san. today my topic is my college life. i wish i could share my happiness and annoyance i have experienced with you all. four years ago i came into the city of baoding and started my college life in ncepu, the most memorable journey of my life. i was just a shy and little boy that time. all the things seemed fresh to me: new faces, military training, large library and physics lab etc. i breathed the air of college greedily, but to tell the truth, the air in baoding is terrible. it’s really hard to explain my feelings that time: curiousenergeticin one word, i was really happy that time.and now i am going to graduate in july. recalling to the four years, i think i have to talk about one thing-----learning. learn how to study independently, learn how to get along with others, learn to love, learn tooh, there are too much things we have to learn.another relationship in college is friendship. my roommates have lived four years with me. in these years, they forgive my faults, cry with me, laugh with me, play with methey always stand with me and support me, i have learned a lot from them. i love them all and treasure the friendship with them.that’s my college life. i cherish all i have experienced in college. i love you, my college!that’s all, thank you!。

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幽默英语演讲小短文(2分钟的)As food is to the body, so is learning to the mind. Our bodies grow and muscles develop with the intake of adequate nutritious food. Likewise, we should keep learning day by day to maintain our keen mental power and expand our intellectual capacity. Constant learning supplies us with inexhaustible fuel for driving us to sharpen our power of reasoning, analysis, and judgment. Learning incessantly is the surest way to keep pace with the times in the information age, and an infallible warrant of success in times of uncertainty.Once learning stops, vegetation sets in. It is a common fallacy to regard school as the only workshop for the acquisition of knowledge. On the contrary, learning should be a never-ending process, from the cradle to the grave. With the world ever changing so fast, the cease from learning for just a few days will make a person lag behind. What's worse, the animalistic instinct dormant deep in our subconsciousness will come to life, weakening our will to pursue our noble ideal, sapping our determination to sweep away obstacles to our success and strangling our desire for the refinement of our character. Lack of learning will inevitably lead to the stagnation of the mind, or even worse, its fossilization, Therefore, to stay mentally young, we have to take learning as a lifelong career.学习之于心灵，就像食物之于身体一样。

摄取了适量的营养食物，我们的身体得以生长而肌肉得以发达。

同样地，我们应该日复一日不断地学习以保持我们敏锐的心智能力，并扩充我们的智力容量。

不断的学习提供我们用不尽的燃料，来驱使我们磨利我们的推理、分析和判断的能力。

持续的学习是在信息时代中跟时代并驾齐驱的最稳当的方法，也是在变动的世代中成功的可靠保证。

一旦学习停止，单调贫乏的生活就开始了。

视学校为汲取知识的唯一场所是种常见的谬误。

相反地，学习应该是一种无终止的历程，从生到死。

由于世界一直快速地在变动，只要学习停顿数日就将使人落后。

更糟的是，蛰伏在我们潜意识深处的兽性本能就会复活，削弱我们追求高贵理想的意志，弱化我们扫除成功障碍的决心，而且扼杀我们净化我们人格的欲望。

缺少学习将不可避免地导致心灵的停滞，甚至更糟地，使其僵化。

因此，为了保持心理年轻，我们必须将学习当作一生的事业。

2．heavy schoolwork【课业繁重】In my opinion, the schoolwork now being assigned to high school students is too heavy. While it is true that students need to study, they need other things as well if they are to grow into healthy and well-rounded adults. High should be allowed more time for play. Playing is not wasting time, as some think. It gives them physical exercise, and also exercise their imagination. Which tends to be stifled by too much study. Finally, the pressure put on high school students by excessive schoolwork can causeserious stress, which is unhealthy physically and mentally. I do not advocate the elimination of schoolwork. I do think, however, that a reduction of the current heavy load would be beneficial to students and to the society as a whole.我认为目前高中生的课业实在太重了，虽然说学生的确应当念书，但是要想长大成为健全的人，他门还需要一些其它的东西，所以应该给高中生较多从事娱乐的时间。

娱乐并不如某些人所想的，是在浪费时间，它可以让学生锻炼身体，发挥被繁重课业扼杀的想象力。

此外，繁重的课业加诸在高中生身上的压力可能引起严重的情绪紧张，这对身心都有害。

我并非主张废除学校课业，但是我认为减轻目前繁重的课业对于学生和整个社会都是有益的。

3．Time【时间】Lost time is never found again. This is something which I learned very clearly last semester. I spent so much time fooling around that my grades began to suffer. I finally realized that something had to be done. It was time for a change.Now I have a new plan for using my time wisely. I have set my alarm clock ahead half an hour. This will give me a head start on the day. I have also decided to keep a log of what I do and when I do it. Looking back on what I’ve done will give me some ideas on how to reorganize my time.时光一去不复返，这是我上学期清楚学到的教训。

我浪费很多时间四处游荡，以致于我的成绩开始退步。

最后我终于了解到我必须有所作为；该是痛改前非的时候了。

现在我有一个明智运用时间的新方法。

我已将闹钟早拨半小时，这将使我这一天的作息提前开始。

我也决定将我所做的一切及做这些事的时间记录下来。

回顾我所做的事情会启发我如何重新安排我的时间。

4．Work and Play【工作与娱乐】Work and play do not contradict each other; in fact, they complement each other. As the saying goes, "All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy." A life burdened with work leads you nowhere, for you would get tired and bored with your daily routine work. On the other hand, proper recreation will relieve the tension and discomfort of our monotonous life because it offers you various ways to let out your pent-up emotions. What I usually do to relax after school is jogging and seeing movies. Usually I don't spare time for exercise, but I value the physical education class at school. Jogging several rounds in the field certainly relieves the day's pressure. On weekends, I'll catch the morning movie for my visual enjoyment. I feel revived and energetic for another week's work-load.工作与娱乐并不互相冲突，事实上，它们之间的关系还相辅相成。

有句格言说：「整日工作而没有休闲娱乐，会令人变得沉闷乏味。

」被工作重担压得喘不过气来的生活，将使你一事无成，因为你将对一成不变的例行公事感到厌烦。

由另一方面来说，适度的娱乐活动能提供各种管道，来渲泄你被压抑的情绪，减轻单调生活中的紧张与不悦。

放学之后，我最常做的休闲活动，便是慢跑与看电影。

通常我并不特地拨出时间来做运动，但是我很重视学校的体育课。