中西方礼仪文化差异

Five Relationships: ruler-minister, father-son, husband-wife, elder-younger brother and friend-friend. This was explained as“There should be affection between father and son , righteous sense of duty between ruler and minister, division of function between man and wife, stratification between old and young, and good faith between friends.”During the more than two thousand years of the feudal period, the ruling class arrange every thing by this relationships, and then formed a class society. In this kind of society, a minister owes loyalty to his ruler, and a child filial respect to his parent. The result is the humanity is neglected and people have no equality.Different from China, in the Renaissance period of England, people began to emphasize the dignity of human beings and the importance of the present life, they voiced their beliefs that man did not only have the right to enjoy the beauty of their life, but also have the ability to perfect themselves and perform wonders. This is the rudiment of Humanism. People became respect the humanity from then on. And then develop into the ideas of what we always said freedom, democracy. Today, take Americans for instance; the top personal values were self-reliance, hard work, and a tie between achieving success in life, personal achievement, and helping others. Hard work, respect for learning, honesty, and self-reliance were most valued among Chinese people. In terms of social values, the top six for Americans were freedom of expression, personal freedom, rights of the individual, open debate; thinking for oneself, and official accountability. The top six social values for Asian people were maintenance of an orderly society, harmony, accountability of public officials, openness to new ideas, freedom of expression, and respect for authority. This study finds that unlike Americans, East Asians are generally more respectful of authority and prize an orderly society, however in concurrence with the West, Asians honor new ideas, official accountability, and free expression.3.Individualism and CollectivismIndividualism refers to the doctrine that the rights of the individual are the most important ones in a society. Most westerners believe that each person has his own separate identity and personality, which should be recognized and reinforced. Therefore, one cannot comprehensive western and its people without understanding individualism. Only with the cognition of individualism can we understand how westerners conceptualize family, friendships, and privacy. The core of individualism is the pursuit of personal and achievements. It is highly valued, earnestly believes and well appreciated as a fundamental social virtue. In Christianity traditions, individuals are important not only to each other, but also to the society and God. Individualism has been handed down from their ancestors. Therefore, to westerners, individualism is not selfishness but rather virtue. They emphasize individualism so much that they believe that there must be something wrong with someone who fails to demonstrate individualism. That likes the sentence “God helps those who help themselves.”However to Chinese people , the word“individualism”is related to the derogatory meaning as egoism, with represents selfishness in quality andlooseness in discipline. In traditional Chinese beliefs, esp. in Confucianism, collectivism is appreciated. It emphasizes cooperationamong group members and individual success is due to the collective effort of the staff in a unit, an organization or a community. The sacrifice of individual interest for that of the collective is a noble quality eulogized so much by Chinese people that being modest and thoughtful of others are highly praised.4. FamilyWestern families advocate equality. The husband and the wife usually have an equality voice in decision-making, and on certain matters, the children, too, have a vote. Family members are regarded as friend and they should treated equality in daily life. In the western, most old people do not live with their children or relatives. If they have enough money they will buy house or apartments in places where other old people live .If they do not healthy and strong enough to live alone, they would rather live in nursing houses for old people than be taken by their children. Therefore they want to stay young because youth stands for hope and energy, which can help them make some positive changes in life. Moreover, they do not like to grow old because they will not gain honor, respect or attention as old people. Case are different in China, where most Chinese family members tend to live together and the young are supposed to show respect and obedience to old people. Generally, old people receive honor, privilege and satisfaction since people believe that an old person is a wise man full of experience. The typical example is that the oldest person is the most respected not only in the family but also in the neighborhood. Just as Confucianism shows in Five Relations, the young should filial love, obedience and duty to the old in a family, esp. in the relationship between children and parents. For example, the Chinese who have moved abroad usually continue to send money back to their parents as a token of their filial piety. Moreover, many young people still try to live near their parents whenever possible even after they are marriage. Westerners stress individualism in families while Chinese stress coalition, which makes the Chinese family etremely cohesive. Family members depend on each other for support and they are required to show loyalty to the family and bring demonstrated virtuous behavior, then the whole family loses face. The meaning of “face” should view in relation to the gain or loss of the social status of the family, not just of the individual. That is to say that Chinese culture emphasizes the collective quality in the nature of individual’s life and behavior. Generally speaking, the Chinesehave a stronger sense of family honor than westerners.。