英语对话笑话
2023英语讲小笑话,3篇
2023英语讲小笑话,3篇（范例推荐）英语讲的小笑话1雇主和雇员Workman: “Mr. Brown, I should like to ask for a smallrise in my wages.I have just been married."Employer: "Very sorry, my dear man, but I can"t help you. For accidents which happen to our workmen outside the factory we are not responsible."工人：“布朗先生，我想请您给我加一点工资。
我刚刚结了婚。
”雇主：“非常抱歉，老兄，但是我无能为力。
对工人在厂外发生的`事故我们概不负责。
”英语讲的小笑话2第一次开出租车A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the footpath1, and stopped centimetres from a shop window.The driver said, "Look mate, don"t ever do that again. You scared the daylights out of me!" The passenger apologized and said, "I didn"t realize that a little tap would scare you so much." The driver replied, "Sorry, it"s not really your fault. Today is my first day as a cab driver. I"ve been drivinga funeral van for the last 25 years."乘客轻拍了一下出租车司机的肩膀，想问个问题。
英语笑话7篇爆笑笑死人的英语对话
英语笑话7篇爆笑笑死人的英语对话网英语栏目为您精选语言地道的英语爆笑笑话,让你开心学英语。
英语爆笑笑话一：几月走的When Jack bowed to someone, he always did it at lightening speed. You shouldn't wait any longer after he has had his head nod. So he was blamed for no manners. Then some warmhearted men taught him, "When you bow to somebody next time, you can count 'January, February, March. until December. Then you can lift your body up. Thus, the ceremony will be perfect.The next day, he met his uncle, he did as the men told him. The bow was so long that it made his uncle feel surprised and escaped away soon . When Jack looked up, he found his uncle gone . So he asked the passer, "Which month did he go away?"杰克给人鞠躬，飞快地一点头，就算完了。
大家都怪他不懂礼貌。
于是便有好心的人教他说，“下次鞠躬的时候，你就在心里数：正月、二月、……一直数到十二月为止，然后再直起身来。
这样，礼节就周全了。
”第二天，杰克见到他的叔叔，他便如法炮制。
这躬鞠得太久，叔叔吃了一惊，赶紧逃开了。
英语对话小笑话带翻译
英语对话小笑话带翻译笑话是日常生活中常见的现象,被广泛应用于电视剧、电影、小品和其他娱乐节目中。
下面是店铺带来的英语对话小笑话带翻译，欢迎阅读!英语对话小笑话带翻译篇一I'm a letter-carrier 我是邮递员A doctor told his patient there was nothing really the matter with him. "All you requir is more outdoor life, walk two or three miles regularly1 everyday. By the way, what's your business?""I'm a letter-carrier." the patient answered.医生告诉他的病人说他没有什么毛病。
“你现在需要的就是更多的户外生活，天天坚持走二三里路。
顺便问一下，你是干什么工作的?”“我是邮递员。
”病人回答。
英语对话小笑话带翻译篇二How about just one RIB? 一根肋骨怎么样?In the Eden, Adam told the God1: "I'm lonely, I need a company.""Ok," said the God, "I will give you a perfect woman, beautiful smart and gentle. She will cook clean and do everything for you, without any complaint2 and question.""Sounds good," Adam said, "But, to make such a good lady, WHAT is the cost?""One arm and One leg.""OH, expensive!" after thought for a while, Adam asked: "How about just one RIB3?"在天堂里，亚当对上帝说“我太寂寞了，我须要一个人陪我.”“好的”,上帝答到.“我将要给你一个完美的女人，美丽、聪明而且温柔，她将毫无怨言地为你烧饭，为你做一切事情。
英语幽默笑话(优秀10篇)
英语幽默笑话（优秀10篇）英国人有他们独特的英式幽默，他们流传的英语冷笑话让人会心一笑，今天，小编给同学们收集、整理了几则特别有趣的英语冷笑话，希望大家能开心开心，一起来看看吧! 篇一一、The little girl did not like the look of the barking dog.It#39;s all right, said a gentleman, don#39;t be afraid. Don#39;t you know the proverb: Barking dogs don#39;t bite?Ah, yes, answered the little girl. I know the proverb, but does the dog know the proverb, too?一个小女孩非常不喜欢狗狂叫的样子。
“没有关系，”一位先生说，“不用害怕，你知道这条谚语吗：吠狗不咬人。
;”“啊，我是知道，可是狗也知道吗？”二、One student to another: How are your English lessons coming along?Fine. I used to be one who couldn#39;t understand the English men, and now it#39;s the English men who can#39;t understand me.一位学生对另一位说：“你的英语最近学的怎么样？”“很好，我过去不懂英国人说话，可现在是英国人不懂我的话了。
”三、An old lady who was very deaf and who thought everything too dear, went into a shop and asked the shopman:#39; How much this stuff?#39;#39;Seven dollars, Madam, it is very cheap.#39;The lady said, #39;It is too much, give it to me for fourteen.#39;#39;I did not say seventeen dollars, but seven.#39;#39;It is still too much,#39; replie()d the old lady, #39;give it to me for five.#39;一位耳聋并且总是嫌东西太贵的老太太走进一家商店。
20个英语笑话爆笑超短关于情景对话英语笑话
20个英语笑话爆笑超短关于情景对话英语笑话关于情景对话英语笑话篇1这是一个阳光灿烂的晴朗日子，森林里一只小兔子坐在洞穴外，在打字机上敲敲打打。
这时一只散步的狐狸走了过来。
Fo某:"Whatareyouworkingon"狐狸：“你在做什么呢”Rabbit:"Mythei."兔子：“写我的。
”Fo某:"Hmmm.What'itabout"狐狸：“唔，是关于什么的”Rabbit:"Oh,I'mwritingabouthowrabbiteatfo某e."兔子：“噢，我在写兔子是怎样吃掉狐狸的。
”Fo某:"That'ridiculou!Anyfoolknowthatrabbitdon'teatfo某e."狐狸：“你太搞笑了吧!谁都知道兔子不吃狐狸。
”兔子：“兔子当然吃，我能证明的。
跟我来。
”Theybothdiappearintotherabbit'burrow.Afterafewminute,therabb itreturn,alone,tohitypewriterandreumetyping.它们一起消失在兔子的洞穴里，几分钟后只有兔子独自出来了。
它回到打字机前继续敲打。
很快，一只狼走了过来，停下看着兔子奋力工作。
Wolf:"What'thatyou'rewriting"狼：“你在写什么呢”Rabbit:"I'mdoingatheionhowrabbiteatwolve."兔子：“我在写论文，关于兔子如何吃掉狼。
”Wolf:"Youdon'te某pecttogetuchrubbihpublihed,doyou"狼：“你不会指望这种垃圾论文被发表吧!”Rabbit:"Noproblem.Doyouwanttoeewhy"兔子：“能发表，你想知道为什么吗”Therabbitandthewolfgointotheburrow,andagaintherabbitreturnby himelf,afterafewminute,andgoebacktotyping.兔子和狼一起进了洞穴，而兔子又一次独自走了出来。
爆笑英语对话笑话大全
爆笑英语对话笑话大全笑话一般比较短小,喜剧性很强,普遍存在于人们的日常生活中。
笑话的娱乐作用可以减轻人的心理压力,促进身体健康。
小编精心收集了爆笑英语对话笑话，供大家欣赏学习!爆笑英语对话笑话篇1男: This seat empty?(这个座位是空的吧?)女：Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.(是的，如果你坐下，我的座位就是空的。
)【我立马走人】男：Haven''t I seen you some place before?(我好像以前在什么地方见过你?)女：Yes. That''s why I don''t go there anymore.(是的。
这就是为什么我不再去那个地方的原因。
)【我不想和你有任何交集】男：Will you go out with me this Saturday?(这个星期六你想跟我出去吗?)女：Sorry. I''m having a headache this weekend.(抱歉。
这个周末我头疼)【^_^头疼也是可以预约的】男：Can I have your name?(我能知道你的名字吗?)女：Why? Don''t you already have one? (为什么?你不是已经有一个了吗?)男：I''m a photographer. I''ve been looking for a face like yours.(我是摄影师。
我一直在寻找一张像你这样的脸。
)女：I''m a plastic surgeon. I''ve been looking for a face like yours.(我是整形外科医生。
我也一直在寻找一张像你这样的脸。
)【长的真丑】男：I think I could make you very happy.(我想我能让你非常快乐。
英语搞笑笑话6篇
英语搞笑笑话6篇幽默寓于笑话之中，它是笑话的精料，智慧之所在。
笑话是幽默的载体，一个成功的笑话能流传千古。
下面是店铺整理的英语搞笑笑话，欢迎大家阅读!英语搞笑笑话一：How can I get into heaven 我怎么才能上天堂"If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my money to the poor, would I get into heaven?" I asked the children in my Sunday school class."No!" the children all answered."If I cleaned the church everyday, mowed the yard, and kept everything neat and tidy, would I get into heaven?"Again, the answer was, "No!""Well, " I continued, "then how can I get into heaven?"A five-year-old boy shouted out, "You gotta be dead!"“如果我把房子和车卖了，在车库举行义卖, 并把所有的钱给穷人，我能进天堂吗?”我问主日学校的孩子。
孩子们齐声回答：“不能!”“那如果我每天都打扫教堂，给院子的草坪割草，并且把东西都收拾得干净整洁，我会上天堂吗?”回答还是：“不能!”“好吧，”我继续问, “那我要怎样才能升天堂呢?”一个五岁的男孩儿叫道：“你得死了才行!”英语搞笑笑话二：I Want Her to go NutsMrs. Flinders decided to have her portrait painted. She told the artist, "Paint me with diamond earrings, a diamond necklace, emerald bracelets and a ruby pendant.""But you're not wearing any of those things.""I know," said Mrs. Flinders." It's in case I should die beforemy husband. I'm sure he'd remarry right away, and I want her to go nuts looking for the jewelry."福林德斯夫人决定让人给她画肖像。
爆笑英语笑话对话大全
爆笑英语笑话对话大全笑话(анекдот)是民族文化不可或缺的一部分。
透过笑话我们可以看到一个民族的生存环境、生活方式、社会关系和心理特征等等。
小编精心收集了爆笑英语笑话对话，供大家欣赏学习!爆笑英语笑话对话篇1This is a good one to follow the following previously submitted joke.A: What do you call a deer with no eyes?B: No idea. (No Eye Deer.)A: What do you call a dead deer with no eyes?B: Still no idea.爆笑英语笑话对话篇2The Fish NetCan you tell me what fish net is made, Ann?A lot of little holes tied together with strings. replied the little girl.鱼网你能告诉我鱼网是什么做的吗，安? 老师发问道。
把许多小孔用绳子栓在一起就成了鱼网了。
小女孩回答道。
爆笑英语笑话对话篇3The New TeacherGeorge comes from school on the first of September.George, how did you like your new teacher? asked his mother.I didn't like her, Mother, because she said that three and three were six and then she said that two and four were six too.....新老师9月1日，乔治放学回到家里。
乔治，你喜欢你们的新老师吗? 妈妈问。
妈妈，我不喜欢，因为她说3加3得6, 可后来又说2加4也得6。
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爱因斯坦，，被公认为是自伽利略、牛顿以来最伟大的科学家、物理学家，被美国《时代周刊》评选为“世纪伟人”。
查理·卓别林，20世纪著名的英国喜剧演员，现代喜剧电影的奠基者，在世界范围内享有盛誉。
他们这样的两个人在一起会聊什么呢？
Meeting between Einstein and Chaplin
卓别林和爱因斯坦间的搞笑英语对话
爱因斯坦：What I admire most about your art is that's universal. You don't say any word and the whole world understands you!
对于你的艺术，我最惊奇的就是它如此的国际化，你一个字也不说，但是全世界的人都懂得起。
卓别林：True. But your glory is greater! The world admires you while no one understands you!
这个我承认，但是你的荣誉更大，你的东西全世界发的人都懂不起，但他们还是如此敬佩你。
I Have His Ear in My Pocket 他的耳朵在我衣兜里
Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?"
伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。
他妈妈问，“发生了什么事？”
"A kid bit me," replied Ivan.
“一个男孩咬了我一口，”伊凡说。
"Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother.
“再见到他你能认出来吗？”妈妈问。
"I'd know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket."
“他走到哪里我都能认出他，”伊凡说。
“他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢。
”
搞笑对话：Jim’s History Examination 吉姆的历史考试
Uncle: How did Jim do in his history examination?
舅舅：吉姆这孩子历史考得怎么样？
Mother: Oh, not at all well, but there, it wasn't his fault. They asked him things that happened before the poor boy was born.
母亲：唉，糟透了。
可话又说回来，这也不能怪他。
嗨，他们尽问一些这个可怜的孩子出生前的事儿。