小学英语搞笑小故事
英语幽默小故事(共8篇)
英语幽默小故事〔共8篇〕篇1：英语幽默小故事 Don't Pick Up the Money on the GroundAn economist professor and a student are walking down the street when they see a $20 bill lying on the sidewalk in front of them. The student goes to pick up the money but his professor stops him and tells him not to bother.Why not?If it were a real twenty-dollar bill, someone would have picked it up already.Everything that can be invented has been invented.别捡地上的钱一位经济学教授和一名学生正在大街上行走，这时他们看到前面的人行道上躺着一张20美元面值的钞票。
学生走过去准备捡，教授制止了他，告诉他别自寻烦恼。
“为什么不捡?”“假设那是一张真20美元钞票的话，早就有人捡走了。
”“该创造的都已经被创造出来了。
”篇2：英语幽默小故事 The Less You Know, the More Money You MakeTheorem: Engineers and scientists will never make as much money as business executives.Now a rigorous mathematical proof that explains why this is true:Postulate 1: Knowledge is Power.Postulate 2: Time is Money.As every engineer knows, Power=Work/Time. Since Knowledge=Power, and Time=Money, we haveKnowledge=Work/Money. Solving for Money, we get: Money=Work/Knowledge.Thus, as Knowledge approaches zero, Money approaches infinity regardless of the Work done.Conclusion: The less you know, the more money you make.知识越少挣钱越多定理：工程师和科学家永远应当比经济专家挣钱少。
小学生英语笑话故事【三篇】
小学生英语笑话故事【三篇】导读：本文小学生英语笑话故事【三篇】，仅供参考，如果觉得很不错，欢迎点评和分享。
【篇1】It's sunny day in spring. Miss Cat is fishing. Suddenly the fishing rod moves. "Great! Oh, it's so heavy!" Miss Cat says happily.The fish is plucked out of the river. "Oh, a big fish! How big the fish is!" She cheers. But she puts the fish into the river and goes on fishing.At the time Mr. Horse goes by and sees it. "What do you set it free?" He asks. "Because my pot is too small. I can't cook it," Miss Cat says.这是春天里一个阳光明媚的日子，猫小姐在河边钓鱼。
突然鱼竿动了动。
“太棒了！哇，好重啊！”猫小姐高兴地喊着。
鱼被拉出来了。
“啊！一条大鱼！这条大鱼可真大呀！”她欢呼道。
但是她却把鱼放回河里，又继续钓鱼。
这时候马先生路过，看见这一切，就问她：“为什么你把鱼放了？” “因为我的锅太小。
我没办法烧这么大的鱼。
”猫小姐回答说。
【篇2】Three handsome male dogs are walking down the streetwhen they see a beautiful, enticing, female poodle. The three male dogs fall all over themselves in an effort to be the one to reach her first, but end up arriving in front of her at the same time. The males are speechless before her beauty, slobbering on themselves and hoping for just a glance from her in return.Aware of her charms and her obvious effect on the three suitors, she decides to be kind and tells them "The first one who can use the words "liver" and "cheese" together in an imaginative, intelligent sentence can go out with me."The sturdy, muscular black Lab speaks up quickly and says "I love liver and cheese.""Oh, how childish," said the Poodle. "That shows no imagination or intelligence whatsoever."She turned to the tall, shiny Golden Retriever and said, "How well can you do?" "Ummmm...I HATE liver and cheese," blurts the Golden Retriever."My, my," said the Poodle. "I guess it's hopeless. That's just as dumb as the Lab's sentence."She then turns to the last of the three dogs and says, "How about you, little guy?"The last of the three, tiny in stature but big in fame and finesse, is the Taco Bell chihuahua. He gives her a smile, a slywink, turns to the Golden Retriever and the Lab and says...【篇3】A guy is driving around the back woods of Tennessee and he sees a sign in front of a broken down shanty-style house: "Talking Dog For Sale."He rings the bell and the owner appears and tells him the dog is in the back yard. The guy goes into the back yard and sees a nice looking Labrador retriever sitting there. "You talk?" he asks."Yep," the Lab replies.After the guy recovers from the shock of hearing a dog talk, he says "So, what's your story? "The Lab looks up and says, "Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA. In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders; because no one figured a dog would be eaves- dropping. I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running.""But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in.I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals.I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired."The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog. "Ten dollars," the guy says "Ten dollars? This dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?""Because he's a liar. He never did any of that stuff."。
英语幽默小故事10篇
英语幽默小故事10篇在繁忙的学习工作中，阅读一些幽默笑话是我们放松心情的好方式。
下面店铺为大家带来英语幽默小故事共10篇，希望大家喜欢!Three competing store owners rented adjoining shops in a mall. Observers waited for mayhem to ensue.The retailer on the right put up huge signs saying, "Gigantic Sale!" and "Super Bargains!"The store on the left raised bigger signs proclaiming, "Prices Slashed!" and "Fantastic Discounts!"The owner in the middle then prepared a large sign that simply stated, "ENTRANCE".幽默故事翻译：中间战术三个互相争生意的商店老板在一条商业街上租用了毗邻的店铺。
旁观者等着瞧好戏。
右边的零售商挂起了巨大的招牌，上书：“大减价!”“特便宜!”左边的商店挂出了更大的招牌，声称：“大砍价!”“大折扣!”中间的商人随后准备了一个大招牌，上面只简单地写着：“入口处”。
During World War II, a lot of young women in Britain were in the army. Joan Phillips was one of them. She worked in a big camp, and of course met a lot of men, officers and soldiers.One evening she met Captain Humphreys at a dance. He said to her, "I‘m going abroad tomorrow, but I‘d be very happy if we could write to each other." Joan agreed, and they wrote for several months.Then his letters stopped, but she received one from another officer, telling her that he had been wounded and was in a certain army hospital in England.Joan went there and said to the matron, "I‘ve come to visitCaptain Humphreys.""Only relatives are allowed to visit patients here," the matron said."Oh, that‘s all right," answered Joan. "I‘m his sister.""I‘m very pleased to meet you," the matron said, "I‘m his mother!"幽默故事翻译：在第二次世界大战中，有许多年轻的妇女在军营中服役。
小学英语幽默小故事五则
Story 1 I Don’t Like Her故事一我不喜欢她Bob goes to a new school.鲍勃去了所新学校。
One day he comes back, “Bob, do you like your new teacher?” his mother asks.一天，他回到家，他妈妈问他：“你喜欢你的新老师吗？”“I don’t like her, Mother. Because first she says that three and three is six, and then she says that two and four is six, too.”“不，我不喜欢她，妈妈。
因为她先说3加3等于6，然后她又说2加4等于6.”Story 2 Ten Candies故事二十块糖Mother asks her son, “Jim, if you have ten candies, and you eat four, then how many candles do you have?”妈妈问儿子：“吉姆，如果你有10块糖，吃了4块，那你还有几块糖？”“Ten.” Jim says.“10块。
”吉姆说。
“Then,” Mother asks.“10块？”妈妈问。
“Yes, Mum. Four candles are in my stomach and six candies are out of my stomach. Four and six is ten, isn’t it right?”“是的，妈妈。
因为4块在我的肚子里面，6块在肚子外面，4加6等于10，不对吗？”Story 3 Count Tomorrow Morning故事三明天早上数It’s a right. John is looking at the sky.这是一个晚上。
约翰抬头看着天空。
Tom is John’s younger brother. He asks John “What are you doing?”汤姆是约翰的弟弟。
英语爆笑笑话6则带翻译双语阅读
英语爆笑笑话6则带翻译双语阅读笑话是指以一句短语或一个小故事让说话者和听者之间觉得好笑，或是产生幽默感，另外一个行动(动作)型的笑话是以动作影响人的视觉及观感，而感到好笑。
下面一起来看一下一些爆笑英语笑话吧。
In music class, the teacher asked Jack: “Please answer me what the oldest musical instrument is.”音乐课上，老师问杰克：“请回答，世界上最古老的乐器是什么?”Jack answered unhesitatingly: “It is the accordion.”杰克坚定地回答：“是手风琴。
”The teacher asked doubtfully: “Why do you say that it is the accordion, my dear boy?”老师疑惑地问：“为什么是手风琴呢，英语笑话我可爱的孩子?”Jack s aid: “Teacher, don’t you see that the accordion is completely covered by wrinkles.”杰克说：“老师，您没看见手风琴上全是皱纹吗?”最好的解释The Best ExplanationOnce in a physics class, Tom’s teacher asked the students: “When it thunders, why do we see the lightning first, then hear the thunders?”一次物理课上，汤姆的老师问同学们：“当打雷的时候，为什么我们先看到闪电，然后才听到雷声呢?”Tom answered the question very quickly, while his classmates were thinking it hard.当同学们都还在苦思冥想时，英语笑话汤姆很快就答了上来。
儿童英文幽默小故事带翻译
儿童英文幽默小故事带翻译这个世界上有成千上万不可计数的英文故事，它们的风格多样，千变万化，诡异万千，有幽默类型的，有推理类型的也有灵异类型的。
今天为大家奉上儿童英文幽默小故事，时间难得，何不深入了解一下让自己的收获更多呢?儿童英文幽默小故事(一)It Must Be CrowdedA teacher is telling his students, “The moon is very large. Several millions people can live there.”And a boy laughs and says, “It must get crowded when it’s a crescent moon.”一定很拥挤一位告诉学生：“月亮非常大，上面能住几百人。
”一个男孩笑着说：“当月亮变成月牙的时候，住在上面的人该多拥挤啊!”儿童英文幽默小故事(二)I can’t Cook ItIt’s sunny day in spring. Miss Cat is fishing. Suddenly the fishing rod moves. “Great! Oh, it’s so heavy!” Miss Cat says happily.The fish is plucked out of the river. “Oh, a big fish! How big the fish is!” She cheers. But she puts the fish into the river and goes on fishing.At th e time Mr. House goes by and sees it. “What do you set it free?” He asks. “Because my pot is too small. I can’t cook it,” Miss Cat says.我没法煮它这是春天里一个阳光明媚的日子，猫小姐在河边钓鱼。
英语幽默笑话
英语幽默笑话笑话一：一只鸟的英语水平有一只鸟飞到了一家语言学校的窗户上，看到窗户上写着：“免费学习英语，从零开始。
”于是，它翘起了尾巴，挺起了胸脯，然后大声地说道：“Polly wants a cracker!”（小鹦鹉想要个饼干!）这时，里面的老师听到了声音，走过来看窗户，发现了一只鸟。
老师开玩笑说：“你来这里学习英语吗？”鸟点点头。
老师继续说：“那你可以念一句英文的经典名言吗？”鸟听后想了一下，然后顺利地说道：“Early to bed, early to rise, makes abird healthy, wealthy, and wise!”（早睡早起使鸟健康、富有和聪明！）老师忍不住惊讶地说：“哇，你的英语真是棒极了！你是怎么学会的？”鸟笑着回答：“Well, actually I learned English from none other than Polly the Parrot!”（嗯，其实我是从鹦鹉波利那里学的英语！）笑话二：失踪的手机一天晚上，一位英国中学生在回家的路上，不小心将他的手机掉在了路上。
等他发现手机丢了，已经回到家了，于是他告诉他的爸爸发生了什么事情。
爸爸安慰他说：“别担心，我帮你打个电话，看看能不能找到手机。
”于是爸爸打了个电话，手机立刻就响了起来，但是声音却传来的十分奇怪。
爸爸听后说：“嗨，我是XX的爸爸。
你找到了我儿子的手机吗？”手机那头传来一个陌生的声音：“是的，我找到了。
你是他爸爸吗？”爸爸回答：“是的，我是他爸爸。
”手机那头的声音又问：“那你能告诉我他的厕所在哪里吗？我正躲在这儿接你的电话呢！”笑话三：英语课上的问题一天在英语课上，老师问学生们一个问题：“如果今天是过去的昨天，明天是过去的明天，那么今天是星期几？”结果所有的学生都陷入了沉思，似乎没有一个学生能够回答出这个问题。
就在这时，一个学生举手回答道：“老师，今天是星期二。
”老师听后很惊讶地问他：“为什么你认为今天是星期二？”学生回答：“因为我们是星期一上的英语课！”笑话四：一个有趣的对话一位美国人和一位英国人在一家酒吧里坐在一起，开始聊天。
关于英文笑话故事5篇_英语的笑话故事简短
关于英文笑话故事5篇_英语的笑话故事简短关于英文笑话故事5篇关于英文笑话故事篇一alieMom:"Whichbananadoyouwant,Victor"Victor:"Iwantthatoneofthegr eatet."Mom:"Victor,youhouldbepolite,tohavethatlittleone."Victor: "Mom,Imutlietobepolite"妈妈：“你要哪一只香蕉，维克多”维克多：“我要那只最大的。
”妈妈：“维克多，你应该懂礼貌，要那只小的。
”维克多：“妈妈，难道懂礼貌就必须说谎吗”关于英文笑话故事篇二TwoBird两只鸟Teacher:Herearetwobird,oneiawallow,theotheriparrow.Nowwhocantell uwhichiwhichStudent:IcannotpointoutbutIknowtheanwer.Teacher:Plea etellu.Student:Thewallowibeidetheparrowandtheparrowibeidethewall ow.老师：这儿有两只鸟，一只是麻雀。
谁能指出哪只是燕子，哪只是麻雀吗学生：我指不出，但我知道答案。
老师：请说说看。
学生：燕子旁边的就是麻雀，麻雀旁边的就是燕子。
关于英文笑话故事篇三WhoItheLaziet谁最懒Father:Well,Tom,Iakedtoyourteachertoday,andnowIwanttoakyouaqueti on.WhoithelazietperoninyourclaTom:Idon"tknow,father.Father:Oh,ye,youdo!Think!Whenotherboyandgirlaredoingandwriting,whoitinthecla andonlywatchehowotherpeopleworkTom:Ourteacher,father.父亲：哎，汤姆，今天我跟你们老师谈过，现在我想问你个问题。
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Where is the egg?
• Teacher:Can you make a sentence with the word "egg"? • Student:Yes.I ate a piece of cake yesterday. • Teacher:Then where is the “egg"? • Student:In the cake,Sir.
It Must Be Crowded
A teacher is telling his students, “The moon is very large. Several millions people can live there.” And a boy laughs and says, “It must get crowded when it’s a crescent moon.”
那不是我的狗
• 一个妇人走进一家宠物店，看见一只很可 爱的小狗。她问店主：“你的狗咬人吗？” • 店主说：“不，我的狗不咬人。” • 于是这个妇人试着抚摸小狗，可是小狗却 咬了她。“哎哟！”妇人说，“我想你刚 才还说你的狗不咬人。” • 店主人回答说：“那不是我的狗。”
聪明的野兔
• 野兔比利很饿，他找到了一只萝卜。当他 捡起萝卜的时候，狐狸先生正在他的生后， 想吃了他。 “我也饿了。你是我的晚餐， 我要吃了你。”狐狸说。 • 比利很吃惊，但是他并不害怕。他说： “跟我来，我有更好的食物给你。” • 他们来来一口井边。
• “朝这下面看，”比利说， “水里有东 西。”“是什么呀？”狐狸先生好奇地问：“那 是一只有大又费肥的母亲。我们下去把她捉上 来。”比利说着，乘一只水桶下去了。 • “你能把鸡放进桶里里。”狐狸问他：“不行， 这只鸡太大了，”比利说，“下来吧。我们可以 一起把它捉上去。快掉到另一只水桶里吧。” • 狐狸照做了。当他下去的时候，比利就上来了。 “再见。”比利从井里出来时说。而狐狸却出不 来了。
一定很拥挤
• 一位告诉学生：“月亮非常大，上面能住 几百人。” 一个男孩笑着说：“当月亮变成月牙的时 候，住在上面的人该多拥og!
• A woman walks into a pet shop and sees a cute little dog. She asks the shopkeeper, “Does your dog bite?” • The shopkeeper says, “No, my dog does not bit.” • The woman tries to pet the dog and the dog bites her. • “Ouch!” She says, “I thought you said your dog does not bite!” • The shopkeeper replies, “That is not my dog!”
鸡蛋在哪里？
• 老师：你能用“鸡蛋”一词造句吗？ • 学生：可以。我昨天吃了一块蛋糕。 • 老师：“鸡蛋”在哪？ 学生：在蛋糕里，先生