搞笑英语话剧剧本.1doc讲课教案
英语幽默短剧剧本
[标签:标题]篇一：搞笑英语话剧剧本搞笑英语话剧剧本《西门吹雪与叶孤城》搞笑7人剧本《西门吹雪与叶孤城》演员表：西门吹雪、叶孤城、花满楼、king、路人、上官雪儿旁白道具：牛奶两袋，匕首一把，戒子一枚，纸屑若干。
第一幕：决战紫荆城之颠旁白：A quiet village is covered with white snow .Birds are dancing in the cold .A man is walking along the street ,step by step .Wind is coming in silence.Another mysterious man approaches .Y与X相遇．X：oH ,I am sorry to knock you !Y:, Never mind baby.X:Excuse me，who are you on earth? Could you tell me your name?Y:,I won’t change my name! no matter what happens. I’m the most famous——-YeGucheng. Who are you?X:Iamximenchuixue.Y惊讶:Ar, ximenchui xue?the best MartialArts?X:Great, you know me !Today is your dead date!Y抱腿：Please, please……Don’t kill me! Let me go!X:No, I must kill you !Y:I don’t want to be killed. There are a eighty-year-old mother and a three-year old son to be looked after by me!X:No way! Because we are fighting now ! you know ?Y突然站起冷冷的说：Don’t force me!X:Pardon!(Y拿出一袋牛奶)X抢过牛奶:milk, very good ! I like drinking it. How do you know that?Y:please drink it!X喝完牛奶:Thanks,Y:Do you still want to kill me ?X:Sure, must! Milk is milk.Y(恼怒+冷酷):Very good ! very good ! I hope you will not forget what you said!?X:I’m sure I won’t!Y:I must give you a lesson ! If I don’t beat you this time, you’ll never behave properly ! 3-2-1! X捂着肚子，蹲下（做痛苦状）：Oach,Oach !Y大笑：HaHa……the milk is exceed the time limit（一人路过，x起身跑过去）X可怜状: excuse me! Help , help , Where is the washroom?please ,tell me .Y:Oh,I see ,go along this street and turn right when you see a corssing road!X:Thanks,byebye.Y:byebye (以胜利者的语气，转头,看见花满楼)Y:Who are you?H:Hua—man—-lou! Have you seen ximenchuixue?Y:Yes, he was beaten by me and is in “WC”.H惊讶:Now you are the best in the world !Y:You are right !H:Teriffic ! you are the one my king looking for ! do you want join in us? If you follow my king,he will give what you want.Y:Yes,It’s very good.H:Ok, follow me, Let’s go to see my king!第二幕：无间道H:My dearest ! let me introduce yegucheng to you! （指Y）this is yegucheng.K:sit down plese, yegucheng.Y:excuse me,I have a question.will you give me what I want just if I follow you?King:yes,I will.Y:That’s good. Can you give me a MM ?K:of couse.You are the one who has the similar taste with me! Hahaha……Y:of course.美女出场M:hello，帅锅..K: this is shangguanxueer.ok,now let’s have a ritual.H走到Y前，《婚礼进行曲》起，H神甫状:Yegucheng! Do you want to follow my king no matter what happens such as cold headache , poor ,rich?Y: Yes,I do.K: Huamanlou, come . put the ring on his finger!（音乐停）X唱着上:(看到戒指) this ring should be mine!K:But who are you ? why should it belong to you?Y急切: king! Dear king ! I must go now , my brother is looking for me.X冷酷:yegucheng! Come here ! I want to tell you something!Y抱X的腿:old brother ! Forgive me!X:Forgive you? Why ?Y: Once there was a chance before me , I lost it . If the god give me another chance, I’ll tell you “I love you ”, If the remustbea limited period,I hope it is thousand year!X:You shall cheat me ! all you did are wrong ! how can you tell me the lady’s “WC”! Y:I like going lady’s WC .I……I……I think that you like what I like.(Ｙ又拿出一袋牛奶)X:milk?I love you.K:Don’t say that “you love me”. I’ll kill you for you saying dirty word to me !X:What? (侧耳装着听不到) You—kill—-me?come, come…(Ｘ上去抓住K)K:Fuck you. I must kill you!X:How can you kill me? haha……Y:Let me have a try! 3-2-1(X捂着肚子，蹲下)M: oh,what happened?（看着X，做惊吓状）are you ok?（跑到西门吹雪身边）Y :do you want to go to wc?X:Yes,I……I……do.Y:haha, the milk was added 三聚氰胺beyond standards.M: you , stupid , bad behavior ! go away !K; why ? why do you help him ! who actually are you ?M: actually,I’m a spy sended by LuXiaofeng,and I fell in love with ximenchuixue. K惊讶: !you —you—You are X’lover?Y: do you know, you are the first person who cheated me ! I hate you .(轻声说)let me tell you,Ｘwill die.M扑倒在Ｘ的身边：Ｘ,do’t die ,you should be alive ,there are much hope in the future and tomorrow is a good beginning !K:what a moving story ! I was impressed ! Y:life is a progress ,but it is depressed that it can not resume !M: life is a progress ,and it is delight that it needn’t resume !(M忽然将一把匕首插进Y的心脏，Ｋ吓跑.音乐《再见，警察》起)Y痛苦状:I never anticipate you treat me by this ,why?tell me why?(Y死，音乐停)（X咳，H扑到身边，电影《我的父亲母亲》原声音乐起）M: X , oh , no ,you can’t die ,we will go home together .X:go home ! ?M:Tomorrow is another day ! even you have the last second to live ,you should be alive ,not only for me , but for our love.X: promise me,you’ll get on well,and you’ll never let go.M I promise . I will never let go（X死）,M: be alive !yeah , be alive ! be alive without ahendance !篇二：搞笑小学英语小品剧本搞笑小学英语小品剧本《新守株待兔》人物：农夫，兔子A，兔子B，大树。
英语搞笑话剧剧本_1
英语搞笑话剧剧本篇一：搞笑小学英语小品剧本搞笑小学英语小品剧本《新守株待兔》人物：农夫，兔子A，兔子b，大树。
农夫：I’mafarmer.（稍停顿）[走两步]Acoolfarmer.（掏出墨镜戴上）[冷酷地走两步，突然被绊了一跤，继续保持冷酷]eh...whenIwasyong,Istudiedinxu~~~~chuanmiddleschool.so,I’mrichnow！[开始展示名牌，边说边掏]Look！Thisismymodern mobile——nokiawc250！Thisismywatch!Thisismymp3!Thesearemyshoes ——(夸张低沉地)ADIDAs!Thisis…[不经意地掏出一个苹果]oh,sorry.[扔掉苹果]It’sthis![从怀里掏出痒痒挠]Doyouknowwhat’sthis？痒痒挠？nonono~~Youareout!!It’smymodern——锄头~！！[看下表]Itistimetodosomefarming！[开始弯下腰做出锄地的动作]树：I’matree!Icandomanythings!Icansing![做出疯狂摇滚歌手的动作，哼哼哈西！！！]Icandance![跳四小天鹅]oh?Therecomesarabbit![引导观众看兔子A)。
树站回后台]兔子A：oK,I’marabbit.nowI’mjustwalkingaroundhere.[农夫继续锄地，边锄边上场，突然看见前面有个兔子]农夫：（惊喜地）Lunch！[扔掉痒痒挠]Iwillcatchit！[偷偷摸摸地跟到兔子后面走][农夫跟在兔子后面。
两个人走啊走。
兔子突然回头。
农夫假装看手表。
两人继续走。
兔子回头。
农夫假装看天气。
两人继续走。
兔子回头。
农夫假装打手机。
两人继续走，兔子回头。
这次农夫冷酷地把枪口对准了兔子。
]兔子A：wahhhh~!（吓一跳）whatdoyouwant?农夫：huh…！Iwillkilluforlunch!兔子A：wah~~~~~~[兔子跑，躲到树后面，农夫追到树前]农夫：where~togo?haha
二人用版本Scene1（At Salesman’s home）N: In a dark dirty house, there lived a small, dirty salesman. He always makes unhealthy candies and sells them to the students. He has a lot of money now. But how does he make the candies? Oh, xu …… He is coming!S: Hello, do you know me? No? Oh, let me tell you .I’m the famous candy salesman at the school gate. My candies are very popular,(展示)，I don’t know why. The foolish students always come here. I’ll b e a boss soon! Candy, money, candy, money……Oops! It’s time to make candies now.(看表)First, put the flour on the table.Then, water, sugar, flour.(边说边做)Now press, press……Oh, my dirty hands! Never mind! Just do it!(满不在意的神情)Press, press……Oh, my god!Never mind! Just do it!Press, press, the children will not know it , it’s OK,hehehe……Now let me cut it into pieces加旁白1人属于4人用）白雪公主与七个小矮人 Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs 英文短剧本旁白：Once upon a time, there was a queen. She had a pretty daughter named Snow White. Soon after the child was born, the queen died. The queen married another queen. The stepmother was very jealous. She dressed Snow White in rags and forced her to do the housework all day and all night, such as sweep and mop the floor, do some cleaning, carry water and so on.白雪：( Sweep and mop the floor, do some cleaning, carry water and so on.)皇后：I’m the new queen. I’m very beautiful. you see. If anyone is more beautiful than me, I’ll kill her. I have a magic mirror. If I want to know something, It will tell me surely.Now, mirror, mirror, come here!魔镜：Yes, I’m coming. Your Majesty! What do you want to know?皇后：Mirror, mirror, on the wall.Who is the fairest of the all?魔镜：Yes. Your Majesty! You are the fairest of all, I think.But there is a young lady. She is as white as snow, as red as rose and as black as ebony.She is much more beautiful than you.皇后：She is much more beautiful than me?Who is she? Tell me quickly.四人用版本Global warmingA．Class begins, good afternoon everyone.B．C. D ：Good afternoon, teacher.A. First, I will ask you a question: What is the serious problem nowadays ?B. I think it’s the problem of environment pollution.A. It’s related to our correct answer. But it isn’t correct one.B. Is it the problem of population increasing?A. No.C. Oh. I got it. It’s global warming.A. Right! Global warming is one of the serious problems nowadays. Because……B. Teacher. I have a question. It was very cold indeed this winter. I think it’s global cooling!A. You got the wrong concept. Global warming doesn’t only mean that the weather is getting hot, but also mean that the weather is out of control. So it will be sometimes very cold.B. Teacher. What causes “ global warming”?C. I know. Now people drive too many cars and the exhaust gases discharged by the cars and lorries pollute the air and also destroy the nature. It causes global warming.A. You are right. Do you know what will happen with the global warming?B. Yes. The ices in South Pole are going to be melted and at the time, many islands will be gradually flooded with water. Human will have no places to live.C. Surely, we don’t want that will happen.A. What sould we do to stop “Global warming”?B. I think we can protect the environment from ourselves. We can plant treesC. When we are protecting the environment, we are saving ourselves.A. Ok. Students, we can’t only speak but not do later . Let us go planting tre es.D. Oh, teacher! Tomorrow is March the twelfth, it’s tree-planting day!A. Yes! Now all of you know the importance of protecting the environment. B．C．D．Let us do our best to stop “Global warming” and make our earth a lovely homeland!A. That is good . I hope you all will be succeeded in protecting the environment. Now the class is over bye-bye students!B.C.D. good bye. Teacher.（4人版本）Narration: Carrie, Cici and Wing are co-worker of a company. This day they are talking in the office.Ca: Bingo! I finally finish this case. It is really tough! I have not slept well for almost a week.Wing:Me too .I always get so busy in this season. I have drunk three cups of coffee in order to keep awake.Ci: Our boss must be enjoying his holiday in Fiji very much. What do you think he will feel when he comes back to see our case?Ca:Of course he will feel surprised and give each of us a promotion. Wing: Come on, he is a devil, how could he do this to us? Anyway, we should award ourselves for these days hard work!Ca: You are right. Let’s pig out on junk food!Wing: I have stayed in China for a whole year and I miss my hometown. I miss German food!Ca: so do I .how much I love French food!Ci: I have not eaten German or French food before. Do you have any recommendation?Ca: If you visit France or go to a French restaurant, snails, cheese, and goose liver and red wine are the best choices.Wing: You also can’t miss the famous German sausage, ham and blue checse Ci: They all sound yummy. But do you know what Chinese eat when they miss their families?Wing&Ca: NoCi: The answer is dumplings!Ca:Well ,I heard that before though I haven’t tasted .Wing: Can you make dumplings, CiCi? Would you make some for us? I have been longing for dumplings for a long time.Ci: Aha, it is as easy as a pie for me .what about coming to my house tonight? We can make dumplings together. I will teach you how to cook it.Ca: Great! That is fantastic. Then it will be the first time to make and eat dumplingsWing: Very good idea! We could busy some basic ingredient at the suppermarket after work.Ci: Sure.We need flour, yeast, pork, cabbages, vinegar, sauce and ginger. (The three colleagues had their shopping and now they are in CiCi’s house)CiCiours some pour on the table and sai d:”Carrie, can you fetch some water here?”Ca: sure, here you are .what s next?Ci:Ci:we have to mix the flour yeast and water together .be careful ,don’t add too much water.Ca: Okay, I’m kneeing the dough repentedly.it is becoming and softer Wing: Yeah, I am cutting the pork into many small pieces, and then I will add several spoons of oil in it .shall I blend them?CiCi: Yes, make sure they blend well. A bit salt and a spoon of vinegar are needed, too.(an hour later)Ca: Yes, the dumplings are prepared .lets start!CiCi: Wait! I remember well that you all miss the food from your hometown.Look, what are these?Ca: Wow! Cheese! Where did you get it? And my favorite red wine. Wing: God. Those are sausage and ham, I can’t believe it!CiCi: Haha, it is a big surprise, isn’t it? Now ,we are got all three countries’ food ready.Ca: So it is a complete big meal.Wing: An unforgettable banquet in my life. Let’s cheers!Ca, Ci, Wing: Cheers!。
5人搞笑英语话剧剧本(英语学习).doc
5人搞笑英语话剧剧本（英语学习）5人搞笑英语话剧剧本Today’s Yang bailao and Huang Shiren ———编剧：方彦龙Character:：杨白劳Y, 喜儿X，王大春（喜儿男朋友）D，王大婶（王大春的母亲）W, 穆仁智（黄的管家）M，黄世仁HPart 1:In 杨白劳’home旁白：(“喜洋洋”背景音乐起)---New Year’s Eve,Xi’er is talking with her boyfriend on the phone, suddenly ,doorbell sounded.（叮咚！叮咚……）喜: Oh! ok! Someone is knock at the door! So I have to hung up!Bye!（开门）杨: 喜儿! 喜儿! What’s this喜: Oh! computer!(高兴地看笔记本)That’s a Laptop!杨: Ha ha! Today I’m able to buy a computer! Next year, I will plan to buy a car!喜: Really Buys a carGreat!杨: Ok, now we will go out ,are you ready喜: Ha ha,I’m ready ok and waiting for you to come back!（门铃再次响起）Oh,I think there must be Aunt Wang and Dacun coming.(开门,)王婶, 大春, 杨, 喜(四人齐声贺道)Happy New Year!hah(喜儿和大春去一边嘻嘻哈哈，窃窃私语不知所言)王婶:（走到杨白劳跟前）Mr Yang,I heard Dachun said, going to jump the disco dancing after dinner.Right杨:Right,What do you think王婶:I’m gald to,oh,are you prepared to go out杨: Sure!.王婶: Ok,go(问杨白劳)杨: Let’s go,(朝喜儿他俩那边喊)Xi’er,Dachun,go!(四人出门下)Part 2: In Huang Shiren’home黄: (黄世仁上台，气势汹汹地说)Hello,everyone!Do you know Huang ShirenTt’s me! Ha ha……But today is not yestady!You see Mu Renzhi coming!穆:（穆仁智走上来）Mr Huang , give me a litte,ok黄: Not! I wouldn’t give you,because I haven’t money!(不耐烦的样子)穆: New Year coming,My wages, a year--（哀求着）黄: Really does not have!穆:（拉着黄的手说）You are so kind in my eyes,can you give me litte money,ok黄: No way,what’s moreYang Bailao has not return the money to me, what can I do for you(无奈的样子)穆: You might ask for him!黄:Asking himI think he couldn’t give me!穆:Why He has contracted the farm, and made many money!黄:I know! But,he——穆:(打断黄的话)Tries!Ok黄: (想了想)Ok! You go together with me!穆: Let’s go! (两人出门下)Part 3: In enlightens the hall旁白: Yang Bailao, Xi’er, Dachun and Aunt Wang finished eating dinner and tojump the disco dancing.(迪斯科音乐起，四人在舞台上狂欢着)（一会儿，杨的电话响了,他走到前台接电话）杨:This is Yang Bailao, please speaking! ... oh... oh!--王婶:（王大婶看见，向杨走过来）Who’s that杨:Huang Shiren, he said he coming here immediately.喜：(停止跳舞，朝这边问)Huang Shiren Is all right（杨白老点头示对）大春: Nothing! We would take them away if they appeared!杨, 喜, D, W: Ha ha (四人继续跳舞)（黄世仁和穆仁智一前一后的东张西望地从下面走上台前）黄: Oh! Everyone，Happy New Year!（大家看了看，没人理睬）杨:（杨朝黄走了过去）The same to you!(音乐停，其他人也走了过来)黄: (和杨握手)Recently alright杨: Fina, but if you ask the money that’s wrong!（自己先坐下，示意让黄世仁坐，这时大春用脚把凳子往后一勾了下，黄坐到地上了，尴尬的看看大家）大春:Oh, I resemble see to have the dirty thing, but not,sits down!黄: (朝杨白老问)Who is this（穆仁智扶黄起来）杨:He is Wang Dachun,Xi’er’s boyfriend.黄:(打量大春说)Are you Xi’er’s boyfriend大春:Yes! (喊道)Is not my that is you黄:No,no!you!(胆怯的坐下)杨:What’s the mater黄:I’m sorry, but, today is the last of the year!en—Debt is--- 杨:(打断黄的话) Does not have!黄: I know you are good man, give a litte,ok(乞求的样子) 杨: No matter what you said to,nothing!黄（抱住杨白老的腿哀求到）Mr Yang ,a litte,just a litte…… 杨: No money,only a life have!黄: just a litte……杨:(很无情地说) No money,only a life have!黄: （无助地向四处环顾）En----大春: (不耐烦地说)You have not heard Does not have!黄:（朝喜儿望去）Miss, you help us!help us !ok(哀求着)王婶:（和喜儿站一块的王大婶说）What you want to do大春:Boils!Go out!（语气非常强烈）( 杨白劳推开黄,喜儿，王大春，王大婶赶黄世仁和穆仁智走)穆:（拉着杨白老的手求到）Do not expel me go, I want to leave,from now, I do for you ,I cound drive---杨: (排了排穆仁智)Ha ha, nice!ok! (穆仁智和所有的人都赶黄世仁出门)黄:（冲穆仁智喊道)Mu Renzhi! Mu Renzhi!Do you know you is my housekeep穆:No!Go out!(全部下)5人搞笑英语话剧剧本。
最搞笑的英文滑稽表演剧本
The bankScene: The manager’s office in a bankCharacters: Miss D. Posit, the bank managerMonica, Miss Posit’s secretaryMr. Moore, a customerA bank robberMiss Posit is sitting at her desk. The robber comes in suddenlyRobber: Nobody move!Posit: Of course, I am professional. When I am working, I never move around.Robber: Read this.Posit: “Three tomatoes, four eggs and two cans of Coca-Cola.” Y ou can get out, turn right, there is a Wal-mart. Y ou will get what you want there.Robber: Oh, thanks.(The robber turns back and goes out.)Monica brings Mr. Moore in.Monica: Mr. Moore.Miss Posit: Good morning, Mr. Moore.Mr. Moore: Good morning.Miss Posit: Thank you, Monica.Monica leaves the office.Miss Posit: Do sit down, Mr. Moore.Mr. Moore: Thank you.He sits down.Miss Posit: Now, Mr. Moore, the situation is like this. Y ou account is overdrawn.￥10,000 overdrawn.Mr. Moore: Oh, good.He takes out his credit cards and shows them to the manager.Miss Posit: Mr. Moore, Mr. Moore, if you use your credit cards, you’ll be overdrawn more, Mr. Moore.The robber comes back again with a bag of grocery at hand.Robber: Nobody move!Miss Posit: Can I help you?Robber: That’s better. Y ou-Mr. Moore: Me?Robber: Y es. Read this.He gives Mr. Moore a note.Mr. Moore: Oh. OK. Er… (Reading) “Three tomatoes, four eggs…”Robber: No, no, no. The other side this time.Mr. Moore: Oh, sorry. Er…(Reading) “Give me all your…honey, or I’ll kiss you.”Robber: Not kiss-kill!Mr. Moore: Oh. Er…Miss Posit. I think this is for you.He gives the note to Miss Posit.Miss Posit: (Reading) “Give me all your money, or I’ll kill you.” I see. Would you sit down for a moment?Robber: Sit down?Miss Posit: Yes. I am very busy at the moment. Please sit over there.Robber: But-Miss Posit: I’ll be with you in a moment.The robber sits down.Miss Posit: Now, Mr. Moore. Y ou spend twice as much as you earn.Mr. Moore: But I earn ￥5000 a month.Robber: Excuse me!Miss Posit: Yes!Robber: I make ￥50,000 a month.Miss Posit: Really? Would you like to sit here?Robber: Thank you.Miss Posit: Mr. Moore, would you sit over there for a moment.The robber and Mr. Moore change places.Miss Posit: Tell me… where do you keep this money?Robber: Here, in this bag.He puts a large bag full of money on the desk.Miss Posit: Oh, oh, yes. V ery nice. Um…would you like to open an account, Mr…?Robber: Robber.Miss Posit: Well, just excuse me one moment, Mr. Robber. I’ll ask Monica to get the necessary papers.Robber: Certainly.Miss Posit leaves the office.Mr. Moore: Excuse me…Robber: Y es?Mr. Moore: Y ou make ￥50,000 a month.Robber: Y es.Mr. Moore: How do you do it?Robber: I rob banks.Mr. Moore: Oh, I see. Y ou rob banks and steal the money.Robber: Y es.Mr. Moore: How do you do it?Robber: It’s easy. First, you need a mask.Mr. Moore: Oh, nice, I have got one.Robber: Well, then you take a gun-Mr. Moore: I haven’t got a gun.Robber: Oh…well, borrow mine.Mr. Moore: Thank you very much.Robber: Y ou take a gun and you take a note.Mr. Moore: Oh, yes, the note. That’s very good. I like that. (Reading) “Three tomatoes, four eggs-”Robber: The other side!Mr. Moore: Oh yes. (Reading) “Give me all you honey, or I’ll kiss you!”Robber: “Money” and “kill”!Mr. Moore: Oh, yes.Robber: Y ou wear a mask, take the note, go into the bank, and put the note on the bank manager’s desk.Mr. Moore: Is that all?Robber: Y es.Mr. Moore: I see.Monica comes back with papers.Monica: Ah, yes. Now, Mr. Robber-Mr. Moore: Give me all your honey…money, or I’ll kiss…kill you.Monica: (Scared) Money, Mr. Moore? Certainly. Take this bag.She gives Mr. Moore the robber’s bag.Mr. Moore: Oh, thank you. That was easy.Robber: Y es, but-Monica: Mr. Moore, your account is still ￥10,000 overdrawn.Mr. Moore: Oh, yes. Well…um…Here you are.He gives here ￥10,000 from the robber’s bag.Mr. Moore: ￥1000, ￥2000, ￥3000, ￥4000-Robber: But…but…Monica: Thank you. Mr. Moore.Mr. Moore: Goodbye.Mr. Moore leaves.Miss Posit: Now, Mr. Robber, here is your account…Robber: But…But…But…Monica: Mr. Robber, Mr. VIP, Here is my telephone number, My name is Monica…Robber: Just a minute! I think something’s gone wrong. Hey, you! Come back! Bring back my money-and my gun! Come back!He runs after Mr. Moore.Monica: Hey, don’t forget to call me.。
《英语话剧搞笑版灰姑娘1》优秀教案
白:Long ago, there ived a gir Her mother had died and her father had married again,Hi new wife had two daugter The are o bad a their mother The e the , homorou, and ong hair gir for m on----转身,指向王子,handome, trong, ta, and brave!王子做害羞状众女士:How ive! How handome! 做陶醉状,冲向前,将王子团团围住此时,飞出一女,持扇“杀出一条血路”王子与灰姑娘共舞,突然手机铃声响起王子:Whoe e bac quic!Or ou’ change bac!开始敲钟灰姑娘:Oh, I mut go!慌忙中跑,掉了一只鞋王子检起鞋,追:Wait! You forget give me ou name, and ou e to Cinderea ‘ home 两姐站在门口,花痴状:Oh, the ing, he i o handome! He i o coo!士兵拿着鞋: hoe! ------Oh, it i m hoe!士兵夺过鞋,递给大姐: You firt!大姐拿过鞋,却怎么也穿不进去士兵: Sto hoe抢过鞋,试穿,费了九牛二虎之力终于穿上,走开来走几步，绊倒二姐: ****, too ma!甩掉鞋,蹲下揉脚,鞋飞到灰姑娘身上继母怒吼: Wh are ou here Bac to itchen! Wah the dihe!士兵: Wait! Ever gir mut tr !继母: She i drit! It i coudn’t be her!灰姑娘默,轻松的穿上了鞋（同时）王子欢呼:Oh, it fit! I found ou !王子和灰姑娘拥在一起，转圈，舞曲响起，两人共舞旁白 :The arried The ived hai ever after!。
初中英语搞笑话剧剧本
初中英语搞笑话剧剧本第一幕开场白旁白：Long long ago there lived a beautiful princess, and there is a big family. But the hostess died. Her son is handsome and goodness. Her husband married another wife. The stepmotheris very cruel to the son. One day their King will hold a ball and choose a prince for his daughter.B: Girls in the other side look at me, look at me, look at me …I am David, handsome and cool. I try my best to loose my weight for this ball. This is my photo three days ago.C: I am rich and humor. Look at my snow-white teeth, because I use the famous toothpaste---Peer.A: Oh, Can I go to the ball?B and C: No!B: Look at yourself. The clothes are so bad and dirty.C: Yes, yes.B: Your hair …（用手拨几下）C: What a mass!B: Your faceC: Black and dirty, you seemed like a frog.（B拿出青蛙的.照片）B: How can you go to meet the beautiful princess?Stepmother: OK, children, let’s go!C: Mum, what about him?Stepmother: You, just stay at home to do some housework.A: But, Mum, I want to go there.Stepmother: Oh, OK.B and C: Mum, why do you take him? Don’t you think he will loose our face?Finally, they go without A.第二幕仙女下凡A: Why Why Why I can’t go to join that ball.Fairy: Ahh, my poor child! What things make you so sad?A: The beautiful princess will held a ball, but mystepmot her and my brothers don’t let me go there.Fairy: My good boy, let me help you. (拿出一套礼服)A:（喜出望外，准备去参加舞会。
英语幽默短剧剧本
英语幽默短剧剧本篇一：两个英语幽默短剧剧本The Pocket Money英语幽默短剧剧本The Pocket MoneyScene1（At Salesman’s home）N: In a dark dirty house, there lived a small, dirty salesman. He always makes unhealthy candies and sells them to the students. He has a lot of money now. But how does he make the candies? Oh, xu ……He is coming!S: Hello, do you know me? No? Oh, let me tell you .I’m the famous candy salesman at the school gate. My candies are very popular,(展示)，I don’t know why. The foolish students always come here. I’ll be a boss soon! Candy, money, candy, money……Oops! It’s time to make candies now.(看表)First, put the flour on the table.Then, water, sugar, flour.(边说边做)Now press, press……Oh, my dirty hands! Never mind! Just do it!(满不在意的神情)Press, press……Oh, my god!Never mind! Just do it!Press, press, the children will not know it , it’s OK,hehehe……Now let me cut it into pieces!另一个白雪公主与七个小矮人Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs 英文短剧本旁白：Once upon a time, there was a queen. She had a pretty daughter named Snow White. Soon after the child was born, the queen died. The queen married another queen. The stepmother was very jealous. She dressed Snow White in rags and forced her to do the housework all day and all night, such as sweep and mop the floor, do some cleaning, carry water and so on.白雪：( Sweep and mop the floor, do some cleaning, carry water and so on.) 皇后：I’m the new queen. I’m very beautiful. you see. If anyone is more beautiful than me, I’ll kill her. I have a magic mirror. If I want to know something, It will tell me surely.Now, mirror, mirror, come here! 魔镜：Yes, I’m coming. Your Majesty! What do you want to know?皇后：Mirror, mirror, on the wall.Who is the fairest of the all?魔镜：Yes. Your Majesty! You are the fairest of all, I think.But there is a young lady. She is as white as snow, as red as rose and as black as ebony.She is much more beautiful than you.皇后：She is much more beautiful than me?Who is she? Tell me quickly.篇二：搞笑英语话剧剧本搞笑英语话剧剧本《西门吹雪与叶孤城》搞笑7人剧本《西门吹雪与叶孤城》演员表：西门吹雪、叶孤城、花满楼、king、路人、上官雪儿旁白道具：牛奶两袋，匕首一把，戒子一枚，纸屑若干。
搞笑英语话剧剧本
搞笑英语话剧剧本《西门吹雪与叶孤城》搞笑7人剧本《西门吹雪与叶孤城》演员表：西门吹雪叶孤城花满楼king路人上官雪儿旁白道具：牛奶两袋，匕首一把，戒子一枚，纸屑若干。
第一幕：决战紫荆城之颠旁白：A quiet village is covered with white snow .Birds are dancing in the cold .A man is walking along the street ,step by step .Wind is coming in silence.Another mysterious man approaches .Y与X相遇．X：oH ,I am sorry to knock you !Y:, Never mind baby.X:Excuse me，who are you on earth? Could you tell me your name?Y:,I won’t change my name! no matter what happens. I’m the most famous——-YeGucheng.Who are you?X:Iamximenchuixue.Y惊讶:Ar, ximenchui xue?the best MartialArts?X:Great, you know me !Today is your dead date!Y抱腿：Please, please…… Don’t kill me! Let me go!X:No, I must kill you !Y:I don’t want to be killed. There are a eighty-year-old mother and a three-year old son tobe looked after by me!X:No way! Because we are fighting now ! you know ?Y突然站起冷冷的说：Don’t force me!X:Pardon!(Y拿出一袋牛奶)X抢过牛奶:milk, very good ! I like drinking it. How do you know that?Y:please drink it!X喝完牛奶:Thanks,Y:Do you still want to kill me ?X:Sure, must! Milk is milk.Y(恼怒+冷酷):Very good ! very good ! I hope you will not forget what you said!?X:I’m sure I won’t!Y:I must give you a lesson ! If I don’t beat you this time, you’ll never behave properly !3-2-1!X捂着肚子，蹲下（做痛苦状）：Oach,Oach !Y大笑：HaHa……the milk is exceed the time limit（一人路过，x起身跑过去）X可怜状: excuse me! Help , help , Where is the washroom?please ,tell me .Y:Oh,I see ,go along this street and turn right when you see a corssing road!X:Thanks,byebye.Y:byebye (以胜利者的语气，转头,看见花满楼)Y:Who are you?H:Hua—man—-lou! Have you seen ximenchuixue?Y:Yes, he was beaten by me and is in “WC” .H惊讶:Now you are the best in the world !Y:You are right !H:Teriffic ! you are the one my king looking for ! do you want join in us? If you follow myking,he will give what you want.Y:Yes,It’s very good.H:Ok, follow me, Let’s go to see my king!第二幕：无间道H:My dearest ! let me introduce yegucheng to you! （指Y）this is yegucheng.K:sit down plese, yegucheng.Y:excuse me,I have a question.will you give me what I want just if I follow you?King:yes,I will.Y:That’s good. Can you give me a MM ?K:of couse.You are the one who has the similar taste with me! Hahaha……Y:of course.美女出场M:hello，帅锅..K: this is shangguanxueer.ok,now let’s have a ritual.H走到Y前，《婚礼进行曲》起，H神甫状:Yegucheng! Do you want to follow my king no matter what happens such as cold headache , poor ,rich?Y: Yes,I do.K: Huamanlou, come . put the ring on his finger!（音乐停）X唱着上:(看到戒指) this ring should be mine!K:But who are you ? why should it belong to you?Y急切: king! Dear king ! I must go now , my brother is looking for me.X冷酷:yegucheng! Come here ! I want to tell you something!Y抱X的腿:old brother ! Forgive me!X:Forgive you? Why ?Y: Once there was a chance before me , I lost it . If the god give me another chance, I’ll tell you “ I love you ” , If the remustbea limited period,I hope it is thousand year!X:You shall cheat me ! all you did are wrong ! how can you tell me the lady’s“WC”!Y:I like going lady’s WC .I……I……I think that you like what I like.(Ｙ又拿出一袋牛奶)X:milk?I love you.K:Don’t say that “you love me”. I’ll kill you for you saying dirty word to me !X:What? (侧耳装着听不到) You—kill—-me?come, come…(Ｘ上去抓住K)K:Fuck you. I must kill you!X:How can you kill me? haha……Y:Let me have a try! 3-2-1(X捂着肚子，蹲下)M: oh,what happened?（看着X，做惊吓状）are you ok?（跑到西门吹雪身边）Y :do you want to go to wc?X:Yes,I……I…… do.Y:haha, the milk was added 三聚氰胺beyond standards. M: you , stupid , bad behavior ! go away !K; why ? why do you help him ! who actually are you ?M: actually,I’m a spy sended by LuXiaofeng,and I fell in love with ximenchuixue.K惊讶: !you—you—You are X’lover?Y: do you know, you are the first person who cheated me ! I hate you .(轻声说)let me tellyou,Ｘwill die.M扑倒在Ｘ的身边：Ｘ,do’t die ,you shou ld be alive ,there are much hope in the future and tomorrow is a good beginning !K:what a moving story ! I was impressed !Y:life is a progress ,but it is depressed that it can not resume !M: life is a progress ,and it is delight that it needn’t resume !(M忽然将一把匕首插进Y的心脏，Ｋ吓跑.音乐《再见，警察》起)Y痛苦状:I never anticipate you treat me by this ,why?tell me why?(Y死，音乐停)（X咳，H扑到身边，电影《我的父亲母亲》原声音乐起）M: X , oh , no ,you can’t die ,we will go home together .X:go home ! ?M:Tomorrow is another day ! even you have the last second to live ,you should be alive ,not only for me , but for our love.X: promise me,you’ll get on well,and you’ll never let go.M I promise . I will never let go（X死）,M: be alive !yeah , be alive ! be alive without ahendance !。
英语小品 话剧 剧本 面试PPT课件
第4页/共13页
• 丁:To be,or not to be,it's a question! I'm glad to see you,my dear princess. 丁:或者不做,这是一个问题!我很高兴看到你,我亲爱的王子。 甲:Oh, it's really a big surprise,so what's your name? 甲:哦,这是一个非常大的惊喜,所以你叫什么名字? 丁:My name? Oh, wait a minute. Do you know Trish Regan?,eh..,it's ok,then how about Robin Meade? And Melissa Theuriau? You know nothing, how can you sit in here. 丁:我的名字?哦,等一下。你知道崔西里根?嗯. .,没关系,那么罗宾米 德?,和梅丽莎Theuriau ?你什么都不知道,你怎么坐在这里。
• 丁:好吧,听着,一首诗,我已经找到了我最好的 爱,我却没有珍惜。当我失去她时,我很遗憾。 它是世界上最痛苦。如果上帝能给我一次机 会,我会对她说的话“我爱你”!
第7页/共13页
• 甲:oh, I can't stand, show you the door, • 甲：哦,我受不了,你走吧, • 丁:If there is a time limit, I hope, it is 10 thousand years. • 丁:如果有一个期限,我希望它是 1万年。 • 甲:oh, it's really a terrible ,awful, horrible day,why it is
- 1、下载文档前请自行甄别文档内容的完整性，平台不提供额外的编辑、内容补充、找答案等附加服务。
- 2、"仅部分预览"的文档,不可在线预览部分如存在完整性等问题,可反馈申请退款(可完整预览的文档不适用该条件!)。
- 3、如文档侵犯您的权益，请联系客服反馈,我们会尽快为您处理(人工客服工作时间：9:00-18:30)。
搞笑英语话剧剧本《荆珂刺秦王》旁白(Aside )/介绍（Introduction）： Long ago there was a crazy country, in this crazy country there were some crazy people, trying to show the crazy history by crazy ways. Mr Jingke was the most famous sword搞笑英语话剧剧本《荆珂刺秦王》旁白(Aside )/介绍（Introduction）： Long ago there was a crazy country, in this crazy country there were some crazy people, trying to show the crazy history by crazy ways. Mr Jingke was the most famous swordsman 剑客and was sent to kill king of Qing, “Yingzheng”. But finally he failed. Do you want to know what happened at that time? Okay, next show will tell you the truth.Action I太子丹（上，掏出镜子梳头，做自恋状）：Mirror, mirror, tell me, who is the most pretty man in the world? (画外音：It’s you, Prince Dan! 太子丹高兴状) Thank u mirror! （面对观众）I’m Prince Dan, the magic mirror said I am the most attractive man in the world. But Ying Zheng is a jealous guy, I feel he will kill me if mirror told him the truth. I am so scared. So what can I do? (向幕里大叫) Where is my minister?阿三(毕恭毕敬) : Honey, I am coming.太子丹：I’ve told you again and again that you should call me “my most beautiful、graceful 、handsome、charming、cute、smart and dearest Prince Dan”!阿三：Sure, honey! I have a good idea. We can find a hero to kill YingZheng~~~（作杀状）太子：Oh yeah~~~. What is the most expensive commodity in this century? Talent!（二十一世纪最需要的是什么，人才！然后拍阿三肩膀，做赞许状） Good idea! But who is the right candidate?阿三：After screening I have two promising persons on hand. One is Miss LiMoChou, the other is Mr JinKe. Tomorrow they will PK for the NO1 killer of the world.太子：Well, show me the winner as soon as possible, OK?阿三：Yes.Action II（《十面埋伏》中刘德华&金成武决斗时的音乐）荆轲Are you Li mochou?李莫愁Yes.荆轲OK. I’m Jingke, you know, I will let you know I am the king of the killers’ world.李莫愁Are you challenging me?荆轲Off course! 耸耸肩表示同意莫愁Come on!音乐起两人冲上前来“人在江湖漂啊，哪有不挨刀啊，一刀砍死你啊，两刀砍死你啊。
”李莫愁倒地荆轲大笑李莫愁痛苦状：What happened? Why aren’t you hurt?荆轲: We don't need any reason to win a person. Don't we? Do we? （赢一个人需要理由么，不需要么，需要么？）李莫愁：Momma always said: "Life is like a box of chocolates, Mochou. You never know what you're gonna get." I got it, Momma is right.轲再次大笑太子丹上（抱拳）：How are you?荆柯：Fine, thank you, and you?太子丹：Oh my God! Could you give me an innovative answer to “How are you”?荆柯：Sure!太子丹：How are you?荆柯：Fine, thank you, and your wife?太子丹晕倒荆柯：Hey, man, I’m kidding!太子丹：Oh, I’m kidding too!（毕恭毕敬）May I have your name card, please?荆轲从兜里掏出一卷纸，上面写着：To be or not to be, that's a question.阿三：Hero，we need your help.荆柯：I am busy now!太子丹：You can get a lot of money.荆柯：I am very busy now!阿三：IC, ID, IQ card?荆柯：I am very very busy now!阿三(手指上场的美女，激动状): Look! She is the most beautiful girl in the world. If you say O.K., she is yours.荆柯（流口水）：I have to say she is a very sexy and beautiful girl, but TCM is my only love!阿三：What? What’s the TCM?荆柯; Hey, guy! You look so smart but why you didn’t know TCM? Any of them can give you the answer.阿三：Excuse me? What’s the TCM?观众甲：TCM - Traditional Chinese MM .太子丹：I must show you the trump card. Ladies and gentlemen, this is Lipton Slimming tea. It is a brand new product of Unilever China.荆柯（激动）：Slimming减食疗法 tea! I have dreamed of it for thousands of times. My wife always threatens to leave me if I couldn’t reduce my weight.阿三：You want? Speak up if you want! Why do you keep silent? Why are you looking at me? Although your eyes are full of sincerity, I’m very glad, you still have to speak up. Take it! Do you really like? Really?你不是真的想要吧？难道你真的想要吗……荆柯(诚恳状) Just tell me what should I do? I will do anything for you.太子丹与阿三（撞胯，击掌）Yeah!Action Ш（《大话西游》主题曲响起）荆珂挽着妻子，太子丹,阿三在后.阿三：Hero, we have already reached Yishui River.荆珂：Just stop here, please. Farewell, my friends太子丹：I will miss you, baby.（太子丹，阿三下。
停顿。
《泰坦尼克号》主题曲起，荆轲与妻子做Jack和rose 在船头的经典造型，忽然荆轲看到一个美女——此时一个中国古典美女经过，向荆轲抛媚眼，并抛下定情手绢。
荆轲高兴的盯着美女看，妻子发觉不对，扭过头来。
）荆珂（急忙收敛）：Darling, I love you.妻子：I love you! You mean more to me than anything in this whole world!（《肖申克的救赎》）荆珂(流泪) ：I love you more. In spite of you and me and the whole silly world going to pieces around us, I love you. (哪怕是世界末日我都会爱着你，选自《飘》)妻子：Well. Be a man, just do it! I will be right here waiting for you.荆珂（欲走还留，执子之手又曰）：Sweetheart! You must do me this honor... promise me you will survive... that you will never give up... no matter what happens... no matter how hopeless... promise me now, and never let go of that promise（泰坦尼克号沉船时，Jack对Rose的倾诉）.妻子:"I promise."荆轲:"Never let go. “妻子:"I promise. I will never let go, Jack. I'll never let go."（荆轲的发音和jack很像，所以加了一些《泰坦尼克号》的台词。