2023年最新的英语幽默小故事10篇

合集下载

英语幽默小故事(共8篇)

英语幽默小故事(共8篇)

英语幽默小故事〔共8篇〕篇1:英语幽默小故事 Don't Pick Up the Money on the GroundAn economist professor and a student are walking down the street when they see a $20 bill lying on the sidewalk in front of them. The student goes to pick up the money but his professor stops him and tells him not to bother.Why not?If it were a real twenty-dollar bill, someone would have picked it up already.Everything that can be invented has been invented.别捡地上的钱一位经济学教授和一名学生正在大街上行走,这时他们看到前面的人行道上躺着一张20美元面值的钞票。

学生走过去准备捡,教授制止了他,告诉他别自寻烦恼。

“为什么不捡?”“假设那是一张真20美元钞票的话,早就有人捡走了。

”“该创造的都已经被创造出来了。

”篇2:英语幽默小故事 The Less You Know, the More Money You MakeTheorem: Engineers and scientists will never make as much money as business executives.Now a rigorous mathematical proof that explains why this is true:Postulate 1: Knowledge is Power.Postulate 2: Time is Money.As every engineer knows, Power=Work/Time. Since Knowledge=Power, and Time=Money, we haveKnowledge=Work/Money. Solving for Money, we get: Money=Work/Knowledge.Thus, as Knowledge approaches zero, Money approaches infinity regardless of the Work done.Conclusion: The less you know, the more money you make.知识越少挣钱越多定理:工程师和科学家永远应当比经济专家挣钱少。

幽默英语小故事16篇笑死人的

幽默英语小故事16篇笑死人的

幽默英语小故事16篇笑死人的导读:我根据大家的需要整理了一份关于《幽默英语小故事16篇笑死人的》的内容,具体内容:在小学英语教学期间,英语小故事能够为学生的学习提供良好的背景。

幽默英语小故事有哪些呢?本文是我整理的幽默英语小故事16篇,欢迎阅读。

幽默英语小故事1.Be Carefu...在小学英语教学期间,英语小故事能够为学生的学习提供良好的背景。

幽默英语小故事有哪些呢?本文是我整理的幽默英语小故事16篇,欢迎阅读。

幽默英语小故事1.Be Careful What You Wish ForA couple had been married for 25 years and were celebrating their 60th birthdays, which fell on the same day.During the celebration a fairy appeared and said that because they had been such a loving couple for all 25 years, she would give them one wish each.The wife wanted to travel around the world. The fairy waved her hand, and Boom! She had the tickets in her hand.Next, it was the husbands turn. He paused for a moment, then said shyly, "Well, Id like to have a woman 30 years younger than me."The fairy picked up her wand, and Boom! He was ninety.慎重许愿一对结婚25周年的夫妻在庆祝他们六十岁的生日。

英语幽默小故事

英语幽默小故事

英语幽默小故事故事1:The Mischievous ParrotOne day, a man named John went to a pet shop to buy a parrot. The shopkeeper showed him a beautiful parrot, which could speak many languages. Impressed, John decided to take it home.However, as soon as John reached home, he realized that the parrot was quite mischievous. It would imitate John's voice and play pranks on him. The parrot would hide his keys, steal his wallet, and even mimic his wife's voice to confuse him.Despite the trouble, John found the parrot's antics amusing and couldn't help but laugh. He decided to name the parrot Charlie, as it perfectly suited its cheeky personality.One day, John's friend came to visit. Charlie, being the clever parrot he was, decided to have some fun. As John and his friend sat down to chat, Charlie imitated their voices and pretended to have a conversation, switching back and forth between their voices flawlessly. John's friend was astonishedand couldn't figure out how both of them were speaking at the same time.Soon, Charlie realized that his prank had gone too far. He feared that John's friend would get upset or angry, so he quickly revealed his trick by saying, \。

英语幽默小故事10篇

英语幽默小故事10篇

英语幽默小故事10篇在繁忙的学习工作中,阅读一些幽默笑话是我们放松心情的好方式。

下面店铺为大家带来英语幽默小故事共10篇,希望大家喜欢!Three competing store owners rented adjoining shops in a mall. Observers waited for mayhem to ensue.The retailer on the right put up huge signs saying, "Gigantic Sale!" and "Super Bargains!"The store on the left raised bigger signs proclaiming, "Prices Slashed!" and "Fantastic Discounts!"The owner in the middle then prepared a large sign that simply stated, "ENTRANCE".幽默故事翻译:中间战术三个互相争生意的商店老板在一条商业街上租用了毗邻的店铺。

旁观者等着瞧好戏。

右边的零售商挂起了巨大的招牌,上书:“大减价!”“特便宜!”左边的商店挂出了更大的招牌,声称:“大砍价!”“大折扣!”中间的商人随后准备了一个大招牌,上面只简单地写着:“入口处”。

During World War II, a lot of young women in Britain were in the army. Joan Phillips was one of them. She worked in a big camp, and of course met a lot of men, officers and soldiers.One evening she met Captain Humphreys at a dance. He said to her, "I‘m going abroad tomorrow, but I‘d be very happy if we could write to each other." Joan agreed, and they wrote for several months.Then his letters stopped, but she received one from another officer, telling her that he had been wounded and was in a certain army hospital in England.Joan went there and said to the matron, "I‘ve come to visitCaptain Humphreys.""Only relatives are allowed to visit patients here," the matron said."Oh, that‘s all right," answered Joan. "I‘m his sister.""I‘m very pleased to meet you," the matron said, "I‘m his mother!"幽默故事翻译:在第二次世界大战中,有许多年轻的妇女在军营中服役。

英语幽默短故事带翻译

英语幽默短故事带翻译
Translation:
聪明的理发师
很久以前,在一个小村庄,有一位非常受欢迎的理发师,因为他的机智和幽默。一天,有个人来他的理发店理发。理发师给他刮胡子的时候,他们开始聊天。那个人提到他第二天要去罗马。理发师开玩笑地回答说:“在罗马小心点。那里的理发师很糟糕,他们会让你的脸上到处都是划痕和伤痕!”那个人笑了笑,付了钱,然后走了。
"Because he's a liar. He didn't do any of that stuff."
Translation:
会说话的狗
一个人看到房子前面的牌子上写着:“出售会说话的狗。”他按了门铃,主人告诉他狗在后院。那人走进后院,问狗:“你会说话吗?”
“是的,”狗回答说。
“那么,你有什么故事?”
Title: Funny Short Stories in English with Translation
English幽默短故事带翻译
1. The Clever Barber
Long ago, in a small village, there was a barber who was very popular for his wit and humor. One day, a man came to his shop for a shave. As the barber was giving him a shave, they started chatting. The man mentioned that he was going to Rome the next day. The barber jokingly replied, "Be careful in Rome. They have terrible barbers there, they will leave your face full of cuts and bruises!" The man laughed and paid for his shave, then left.

英语幽默笑话

英语幽默笑话

英语幽默笑话笑话一:一只鸟的英语水平有一只鸟飞到了一家语言学校的窗户上,看到窗户上写着:“免费学习英语,从零开始。

”于是,它翘起了尾巴,挺起了胸脯,然后大声地说道:“Polly wants a cracker!”(小鹦鹉想要个饼干!)这时,里面的老师听到了声音,走过来看窗户,发现了一只鸟。

老师开玩笑说:“你来这里学习英语吗?”鸟点点头。

老师继续说:“那你可以念一句英文的经典名言吗?”鸟听后想了一下,然后顺利地说道:“Early to bed, early to rise, makes abird healthy, wealthy, and wise!”(早睡早起使鸟健康、富有和聪明!)老师忍不住惊讶地说:“哇,你的英语真是棒极了!你是怎么学会的?”鸟笑着回答:“Well, actually I learned English from none other than Polly the Parrot!”(嗯,其实我是从鹦鹉波利那里学的英语!)笑话二:失踪的手机一天晚上,一位英国中学生在回家的路上,不小心将他的手机掉在了路上。

等他发现手机丢了,已经回到家了,于是他告诉他的爸爸发生了什么事情。

爸爸安慰他说:“别担心,我帮你打个电话,看看能不能找到手机。

”于是爸爸打了个电话,手机立刻就响了起来,但是声音却传来的十分奇怪。

爸爸听后说:“嗨,我是XX的爸爸。

你找到了我儿子的手机吗?”手机那头传来一个陌生的声音:“是的,我找到了。

你是他爸爸吗?”爸爸回答:“是的,我是他爸爸。

”手机那头的声音又问:“那你能告诉我他的厕所在哪里吗?我正躲在这儿接你的电话呢!”笑话三:英语课上的问题一天在英语课上,老师问学生们一个问题:“如果今天是过去的昨天,明天是过去的明天,那么今天是星期几?”结果所有的学生都陷入了沉思,似乎没有一个学生能够回答出这个问题。

就在这时,一个学生举手回答道:“老师,今天是星期二。

”老师听后很惊讶地问他:“为什么你认为今天是星期二?”学生回答:“因为我们是星期一上的英语课!”笑话四:一个有趣的对话一位美国人和一位英国人在一家酒吧里坐在一起,开始聊天。

简短的英语笑话带翻译

简短的英语笑话带翻译

简短的英语笑话带翻译篇一:短篇英语笑话10则带翻译短篇英语笑话10则带翻译① Goldfish金鱼Stan: I won 92 goldfish. Fred: Where are you going to keep them? Stan: In the bathroom 。

Fred: But what will you do when you want to take a bath? Stan: Blindfold(蒙眼睛)them! =================================================================== 斯丹:我赢了92 条金鱼。

弗雷德:你想在哪儿养它们?斯丹:浴室。

弗雷德:但是你想洗澡时怎么办?斯丹:蒙住它们的眼睛!② The Revenge 欺骗的代价欺骗的代价Old Farmer Johnson was dying. The family was standing around his bed. With a low voice he said to his wife: "When I'm dead I want you to marry farmer Jones." Wife: "No, I can't marry anyone a er you." Johnson: "But I want you to." Wife: "But why?" Johnson: "Jones once cheated me in a horse deal!" =================================================================== 老农约翰逊就要死了。

他的家人都站在床边。

英语幽默笑话(优秀10篇)

英语幽默笑话(优秀10篇)

英语幽默笑话(优秀10篇)英国人有他们独特的英式幽默,他们流传的英语冷笑话让人会心一笑,今天,小编给同学们收集、整理了几则特别有趣的英语冷笑话,希望大家能开心开心,一起来看看吧! 篇一一、The little girl did not like the look of the barking dog.It#39;s all right, said a gentleman, don#39;t be afraid. Don#39;t you know the proverb: Barking dogs don#39;t bite?Ah, yes, answered the little girl. I know the proverb, but does the dog know the proverb, too?一个小女孩非常不喜欢狗狂叫的样子。

“没有关系,”一位先生说,“不用害怕,你知道这条谚语吗:吠狗不咬人。

;”“啊,我是知道,可是狗也知道吗?”二、One student to another: How are your English lessons coming along?Fine. I used to be one who couldn#39;t understand the English men, and now it#39;s the English men who can#39;t understand me.一位学生对另一位说:“你的英语最近学的怎么样?”“很好,我过去不懂英国人说话,可现在是英国人不懂我的话了。

”三、An old lady who was very deaf and who thought everything too dear, went into a shop and asked the shopman:#39; How much this stuff?#39;#39;Seven dollars, Madam, it is very cheap.#39;The lady said, #39;It is too much, give it to me for fourteen.#39;#39;I did not say seventeen dollars, but seven.#39;#39;It is still too much,#39; replie()d the old lady, #39;give it to me for five.#39;一位耳聋并且总是嫌东西太贵的老太太走进一家商店。

  1. 1、下载文档前请自行甄别文档内容的完整性,平台不提供额外的编辑、内容补充、找答案等附加服务。
  2. 2、"仅部分预览"的文档,不可在线预览部分如存在完整性等问题,可反馈申请退款(可完整预览的文档不适用该条件!)。
  3. 3、如文档侵犯您的权益,请联系客服反馈,我们会尽快为您处理(人工客服工作时间:9:00-18:30)。

2023年最新的英语幽默小故事10篇1Mr. Jones had a few days’ holiday, so he said, “I’m going to go to the mountains by train.” He put on his best clothes, took a small bag, went to the station and got on the train. He had a beautiful hat, and he often put his head out of the window during the trip and looked at the mountains. But the wind pulled his hat off.Mr. Jones quickly took his old bag and threw that out of the window too.The other people in the carriage laughed. “Is your bag going to bring your beautiful hat back” they ask ed.“No,” Mr. Jones answered, “but there’s no name and no addressin my hat, and there’s a name and address on the bag. Someone’s going to find both of them near each other, and he’s going to send me the bag and the hat.”琼斯先生有几天的假期,所以他说,“我要去山上的火车。

”他穿上他最好的衣服,拿了一个小袋子,去了火车站,上了火车。

他有一顶漂亮的帽子,他经常把他的头伸出车窗去看山。

但是风把他的帽子。

琼斯先生很快把他的旧袋子,把它扔出窗外。

车厢里的人都笑了。

“难道你的包会把你的漂亮的帽子带回来吗?“他们问。

“不,”琼斯先生回答说,“但是没有名字和地址在我的帽子上,并且有一个名字和地址的包。

有人会发现它们,并且他将我的包和帽子给我。

”2An old lady went out shopping last Tuesday. She came to a bank and saw a car near the door. A man got out of it and went into the bank. She looked into the car. The keys were in the lock.The old lady took the keys and followed the man into the bank.The man took a gun out of his pocket and said to the clerk, “Give me all the money.”But the old lady did not see this. She went to the man, put the keys in his hand and said, “Young man, you’re stupid! Never leave your keys in your car: someone’s going to steal it!”The man looked at the old woman for a few seconds. Then he looked at the clerk—and then he took his keys, ran out of the bank, got into his car and drove away quickly, without any money.一位老太太出去购物上周二。

她来到银行,看见一辆汽车门附近。

一个男人走出来,进了银行。

她看着车。

钥匙在锁。

老太太把钥匙跟着那人进了银行。

那个男人从口袋里掏出一把枪,对店员说,“给我所有的钱。

”不过老太太不见。

她去的人,把钥匙放在他手上,说,“年轻人,你是愚蠢的!永远不会离开你的车钥匙:有人去偷!“男人看着老太太几秒钟。

然后他看着clerk-and 然后他把他的钥匙,跑到银行,上了他的车,很快开走了,没有任何的钱。

”3Mary was an English girl, but she lived in Rome. She was six years old. Last year her mother said to her, “You’re six years old now, Mary, and you’re going to begin going to a school here. You’re going to like it very much, because it’s a nice school.”“Is it an English school” Mary asked.“Yes, it is,” her mother said.Mary went to the school, and enjoyed her lessons. Her mother always took her to school in the morning and brought her home in the afternoon. Last Monday her mother went to the school at 4 o’clock, and Mary ran out of her class.“We’ve got a new girl in our class today, Mummy,” she said. “She’s six years old too, and she’s very nice, but she isn’t English. She’s German.”“Does she speak English” Mary’s mother asked.“No, but she laughs in English,” Mary said happily.玛丽是一个英国女孩,但她住在罗马。

她六岁。

去年她妈妈对她说,“你六岁了,玛丽,你要开始去学校吗。

你会很喜欢它,因为它是一个很好的学校。

”“这是一个英语学校?“玛丽问。

“是的,是的,”她母亲说。

玛丽去学校,享受她的课。

她的母亲经常带她到学校在上午和下午接她回家。

上周一她妈妈去学校在四点的时候,玛丽跑到她的课。

“我们已经有了一个新的女孩在我们班今天,妈妈,”她说。

“她六岁了,而且她很漂亮,但她不是英国人。

她是德国人。

”她会说英语吗?“玛丽的妈妈问。

“不,但她笑着说英语,”玛丽高兴地说。

4Mrs. Jones did not have a husband, but she had two sons. They were big, strong boys, but they were lazy. On Saturdays they did not go to school, and then their mother always said, “Please cut the grass in the garden this afternoon, boys.” The boys did not like it, but they always did it.Then somebody gave one of the boys a magazine, and they saw a picture of a beautiful lawn-mower in it. There was a seat on it, and there was a woman on the seat.The boy took the picture to his mother and brother and said to them, “Look, that woman’s sitting on the lawn-mower and driving it and cutting the grass. W e want one of those.”“One of those lawn-mowers” his mother asked. “No,” the boy said. “We want one of those women. Then she can cut grass every week.”琼斯太太没有丈夫,但她有两个儿子。

他们是大的,强壮的男孩,但是他们很懒惰。

在星期六他们不去上学,然后他们的妈妈总是说,“请把花园里的草今天下午,男孩。

”男孩们不喜欢它,但他们总是这样做。

于是有人给了一个男孩杂志,他们看到了一幅美丽的割草机,在它。

有一个座位上,有一个女人,在座位上。

那男孩把照片传到自己的母亲和弟弟,对他们说,“看,那女的坐在草坪割草机和驾驶它和割草。

我们想要的。

”“其中一个剪草机?“他的妈妈问。

“不,”男孩说。

“我们想要一个这样的女人。

然后她每星期可割的草。

”5One of Harry’s feet was bigger and the other. “I can never find boots and shoes for my feet,” he said to his friend Dick.“Why don’t you go to a shoemaker” Dick said. “A good one can make you the right shoes.”“I’ve never been to a shoemaker,” Harry said. “Aren’t they very expensive”“No,” Dick said,“some of them aren’t. There’s a good on e in our village, and he’s quite cheap. Here’s his address.” He wrote something on a piece of paper and gave it to Harry.Harry went to the shoemaker in Dick’s village a few days later, and the shoemaker made him some shoes.Harry went to the shop again a week later and looked at the shoes. Then he said to the shoemaker angrily, “You’re a silly man! I said, ‘Make one shoe bigger than the other,’ but you’ve made one smaller than the other!”哈利的一个更大的脚。

相关文档
最新文档