英语笑话-音乐天才

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一分钟笑话才艺小学生

一分钟笑话才艺小学生

一分钟笑话才艺小学生一分钟笑话才艺小学生笑话一:数学小天才从前有个小学生,他非常擅长数学。

一天,老师上课让同学们做一个难题,但是没有一个同学会做。

就在大家束手无策的时候,这个数学小天才举手说他知道答案。

老师非常惊讶,嘴里咕哝着:“这孩子怎么样能这么聪明呢?”小天才微笑着说:“因为这是我昨晚梦里的作业啊!”笑话二:英语天才有一天,小明在英语老师面前展示他的才艺。

老师让他用一分钟时间用英文解释“水”。

小明立刻挺直了腰杆,手舞足蹈地说:“Water就是H2O!”老师愣住了,满脸茫然地问:“那你还有一分钟时间怎么办?”小明深思熟虑地回答:“再解释一遍。

”笑话三:瞎子参观动物园一群瞎子去动物园参观。

在大象面前,一个瞎子摸着大象的腿,高兴地大叫:“我摸到一只大柱子!”另一个瞎子蹭上去摸到大象的鼻子,兴奋地说:“哇!这个柱子还有两条胡须!”第三个瞎子摸到大象的耳朵,惊讶地喊道:“不对!这不是柱子!这是大帆布!”笑话四:笨笨的小明小明是一个很聪明的小学生,但有时候也会做一些很蠢的事情。

一天,他从家里跑进教室,高兴地告诉大家:“我昨晚梦到了一只会说话的乌鸦!”同学们都好奇地问:“那它说了什么?”小明竖起了两根手指头,得意地说:“它说了‘嘎嘎’!”同学们都哭笑不得。

笑话五:天才篮球小王子小明是校篮球队的队长,他凭借着出色的篮球技术一直是大家的榜样。

有一天,他的队友们都围在一起讨论下一场比赛的战术。

小明耐心地聆听,突然他灵机一动地提醒大家:“我们还是先把球放进对方的篮筐里吧!”全场顿时陷入了欢笑。

笑话六:模仿大师小芳是一位模仿大师,在学校的表演中一度成为全校的焦点。

一天,她决定模仿一只鸽子。

她鼓起胸膛,摆出了标志性的鸽子姿势,然后开始缓缓地行走,忽然她停下了脚步,面露疑惑地问:“喂,你们听到鸽子飞翔的声音了吗?”全场爆发出了阵阵笑声。

笑话七:师生糗事有一天,小明的老师在上课的时候走神了,不小心把话题扯到了自己。

她讲到:“小时候我不喜欢上学,总是想方设法逃学。

读英文的笑话

读英文的笑话

读英文的笑话笑话1:Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent!笑话2:Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!笑话3:I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised.笑话4:I bought shoes from a drug dealer once. I don't know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!笑话5:I asked the librarian if she had any books on paranoia. She whispered, "They're right behind you!"笑话6:Why don't skeletons fight each other? They don't have the guts!笑话7:Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!笑话8:I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.笑话9:I saw a wino eating grapes. I told him, "You have to wait!"笑话10:I couldn't quite remember how to throw a boomerang, but eventually, it came back to me.笑话11:Why don't eggs tell jokes? They might crack up!笑话12:What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!笑话13:My friend told me that I should be more optimistic. I said, "Okay, I'm positive!"笑话14:I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.笑话15:Did you hear about the mathematician who's afraid of negative numbers? He will stop at nothing to avoid them!笑话16:Why don't calculators go to the beach? Because they can't handle the waves!笑话17:What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!笑话18:I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.笑话19:I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.笑话20:Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!笑话21:I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.笑话22:What did one wall say to the other wall? I'll meet you at the corner!笑话23:Why do bees have sticky hair? Because they use honeycombs!笑话24:I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.笑话25:Why did the math book look sad? Because it had too many problems!笑话26:What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!笑话27:Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!笑话28:I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.笑话29:What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!笑话30:Why don't calculators go to the beach? Because they can't handle the waves!以上是30个英文笑话的集合,希望你能通过阅读它们,享受一段愉快的时光并大笑一番!笑话的目的是为了带给我们快乐和轻松,让我们忘记生活中的压力和烦恼。

聪明人才懂的15个英语笑话

聪明人才懂的15个英语笑话

聪明人才懂的15个英语笑话聪明人才懂的15个英语笑话能否get到笑点,也是判断聪明与否的'标志,下面是店铺整理的聪明人才懂的15个英语笑话,大家看懂了么?更多消息请关注应届毕业生网。

The smarter you are, the more you find funny.So it's no surprise that smart folks from the higher echelons of every discipline have their own in-jokes.But surely their knowledge isn't so specialized that you couldn't enjoy their jokes as well? Redditors recently took turns sharing their own favorite intellectual jokes and we've gathered our favorites here.Instead of going to medical school, getting a linguistics degree, and brushing up on your art history, just check out this cheat sheet for our favorite "smart" jokes.-A photon is going through airport security. The TSA agent asks if he has any luggage. The photon says, "No, I'm traveling light."It's funny because: "Traveling light" is a turn of phrase used to indicate traveling without much (or any) luggage. In science, a photon is a particle of light (almost always moving).It's on this list because: Air travel, amirite?!-Pretentious? Moi?It's funny because: Only a pretentious person whose daily life doesn't require French would actually say "moi" and mean it.It's in this list because: Clocking in at two words, it's the shortest joke in the English language.-A logician's wife is having a baby. The doctor immediately hands the newborn to the dad. The wife says, "Is it a boy or agirl?" The logician says, "Yes."It's funny because: Processing that question through Boolean logic, "yes" is technically correct. How would you answer if the question were "Is it a boy AND a girl?"It's on this list because: Logicians don't get enough love.-How can you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber? Ask them to pronounce "unionized."It's funny because: A more labor-conscious plumber would pronounce the word as "yoon-yun-ized." A chemist would probably say "un-eye-on-ized."It's on this list because: What other joke can simultaneously address the removal of charged particles from an atom as well as the organization of workers trying to achieve shared goals?-Two women walk into a bar and talk about the Bechdel test.It's funny because: The Bechdel test is a measure of gender equality in the media. A piece of media is considered to pass the test if it includes at least two women who talk to each other about something besides men. This joke passes the test.It's on this list because: The media is self-referential.-Heard about that new band called 1023 MB? They haven't had any gigs yet.It's funny because: A gigabyte is a measure of data equal to 1,024 MB. As you can see the band is only 1,023 MB, they haven't had any "gigs" yet.It's on this list because: A lot of people probably thought one GB is a nice round 1,000 MB.-Heisenberg was speeding down the highway. A cop pulls him over and says "Do you have any idea how fast you were going back there?" Heisenberg says, "No, but I knew where I was."It's funny because: Werner Heisenberg was a German physicist and one of the key figures in quantum theory. His famous "Heisenberg Uncertainty Principal" states that we can know either where a quantum particle is or how fast it's moving, but it's impossibleto know both at the same time.It's on this list because: Heisenberg's life was amazing. Seriously.-C, Eb, and G walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry, no minors."It's funny because: C, Eb, and G are the musical notes that constitute a C minor chord.It's on this list because: The relationship between a major chord and its relative minor is pretty cool.First Law of Thermodynamics: You can't win. Second Law of Thermodynamics: You can't break even. Third Law of Thermodynamics: You can't stop playing.It's funny because: It's an absolute reductionist take on the real laws of thermodynamics, and the language is such that it implies life isn't worth living. In plainterms, the laws of thermodynamics are: energy can't be created or destroyed, things tend to move from order to disorder, and the lower the temperature drops, the more disorderly things become.It's in this list because: It's actually an accurate take on thermodynamics.-If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.It's funny because: You were expecting the word "problem," but the joke-teller replaced it with "precipitate," which is the solid that forms in a solution of liquid after a chemical reaction has taken place.It's on this list because: Chemists are hard enough to understand as it is. Now you have a slight edge.-A linguistics professor says during a lecture that, "In English, a double negative forms a positive. But in some languages, such as Russian, a double negative is still a negative. However, in no language in the world can a double positive form a negative." But then a voice from the back of the room piped up, "Yeah, right."It's funny because: "Yeah" and "right" are technically affirmative words, but put these two positives together and you get an ultra-sarcastic, "Yeah, right."It's on this list because: It's totally true.-This is the sort of English up with which I will not put.It's funny because: This phrase, with varying versions often attributed to Winston Churchill, is a response to the famous rule in English that a sentence isn't supposed to end in a preposition. In constructing the sentence this way, the speaker is technically correct, but it's an incredibly awkward way to communicate.It's on this list because: Language is complicated. Let's mock it.-How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb?A fish.It's funny because: Surrealism is an movement all about creating weird illogical art. As this joke makes no sense, it is itself a surrealist work.It's on this list because: Banana.-Knock knock. Who's there? Knock knock. Who's there? Knock knock. Who's there? Knock knock. Who's there? Philip Glass.It's funny because: Philip Glass is an American composer whose music is often described as minimalist and repetitive.It's on this list because: You've very likely seen a few movies he scored.-What does a dyslexic, agnostic, insomniac do at night? He stays up wondering if there really is a dog.It's funny because: This poor afflicted soul's dyslexia has caused him to confuse "God" with "dog." His agnosticism forces him to wrestle with "dog's" existence. And his insomnia has him losing sleep over it.It's on this list because: You never know someone's struggle.【聪明人才懂的15个英语笑话】。

英语爆笑笑话6则带翻译双语阅读

英语爆笑笑话6则带翻译双语阅读

英语爆笑笑话6则带翻译双语阅读笑话是指以一句短语或一个小故事让说话者和听者之间觉得好笑,或是产生幽默感,另外一个行动(动作)型的笑话是以动作影响人的视觉及观感,而感到好笑。

下面一起来看一下一些爆笑英语笑话吧。

In music class, the teacher asked Jack: “Please answer me what the oldest musical instrument is.”音乐课上,老师问杰克:“请回答,世界上最古老的乐器是什么?”Jack answered unhesitatingly: “It is the accordion.”杰克坚定地回答:“是手风琴。

”The teacher asked doubtfully: “Why do you say that it is the accordion, my dear boy?”老师疑惑地问:“为什么是手风琴呢,英语笑话我可爱的孩子?”Jack s aid: “Teacher, don’t you see that the accordion is completely covered by wrinkles.”杰克说:“老师,您没看见手风琴上全是皱纹吗?”最好的解释The Best ExplanationOnce in a physics class, Tom’s teacher asked the students: “When it thunders, why do we see the lightning first, then hear the thunders?”一次物理课上,汤姆的老师问同学们:“当打雷的时候,为什么我们先看到闪电,然后才听到雷声呢?”Tom answered the question very quickly, while his classmates were thinking it hard.当同学们都还在苦思冥想时,英语笑话汤姆很快就答了上来。

名人英语笑话带翻译

名人英语笑话带翻译

名人英语笑话带翻译Celebrity English Jokes 名人英语笑话。

1. Why did Adele cross the road? To say hello from the other side. 。

为什么Adele要穿过马路?为了从另一边说声你好。

2. Why did Taylor Swift go to the dentist? To get her new single, "Teeth", cleaned. 。

为什么Taylor Swift去看牙医?为了让她的新单曲《Teeth》更干净。

3. What did Justin Bieber say when he got a haircut? "Sorry". 。

当Justin Bieber理发时,他说了什么?“对不起”。

4. Why did Beyonce go to the bank? To cash her "checks,checks, checks, checks, checks". 。

为什么Beyonce去银行?为了兑现她的“支票,支票,支票,支票,支票”。

5. Why did Ed Sheeran quit Twitter? He couldn't keep up with the "Shape of You" memes. 。

为什么Ed Sheeran退出Twitter?他跟不上“Shape of You”梗。

6. Why did Lady Gaga go to the store? To buy some "Poker Face" cards. 。

为什么Lady Gaga去商店?为了买一些“Poker Face”卡牌。

7. What did Drake say when he saw a spider? "I'm upset". 。

超简短的英文笑话

超简短的英文笑话

超简短的英文笑话超简短的英文笑话(精选5篇)超简短的英文笑话1On the way home after watching a ballet performance, the kindergarten teacher asked her students what they thought of it. The smallest girl in the class said she wished the dancers were taller so that they would not have to stand on their toes all the time.在观看完芭蕾舞表演回家的路上,幼儿园老师问学生的观后感。

班上最小的女孩说,她希望舞蹈演员可以长得更高一点儿,那么他们就不用整天踮着脚尖了。

超简短的英文笑话2Professor: When is your birthday?Kid: May 30.Professor: Which year?Kid: Every year.教授:你的生日是什么时候?孩子:5月30日。

教授:哪一年?孩子:每年都是。

超简短的英文笑话3Before the final examination, T om told his mother, "Mom, I had a dream last night that Id passed todays exam.""Dont trust dreams, dear. It is said what you experience in dreams usually turns out to be the opposite." Mother replied."Then I do hope Ill fail the other subjects in my dream tonight," Tom said.在期末考试之前,汤姆告诉他的母亲:“妈妈,我昨天晚上做了一个梦,梦见我通过了今天的考试。

英语幽默小笑话100个

英语幽默小笑话100个

英语幽默小笑话100个笑话是一种能够带给人快乐,平添生活乐趣的文凭形式,以其机智、幽默、搞笑的特点,深受人们喜爱。

英语幽默小笑话就是一种给人带来快乐的黑色幽默渐层,也是美国人的一大特色文化。

以下是100个英语幽默小笑话:1、A: What did the fish say when it hit the wall?B: Dam!2、Q: What did the policeman say to his belly?A: Freeze!3、Q: Where do you find a dog with no legs?A: Right where you left it.4、Q: What did the tie say to the hat?A: You go on a head, and I hang around.5、Q: Why did the vampire go to the orthodontist?A: He wanted to improve his bite.6、Q: What did the fish say when it swam into a wall?A: Dam!7、Q: What did the tree say to autumn?A: Leaf me alone.8、Q: What did the paper say to the pencil?A: Write on me!9、Q: What did the monster say when he swallowed a clown?A: You taste funny.10、Q: Why don scientists trust atoms?A: Because they make up everything.11、Q: How do you make a tissue dance?A: You put a little boogie in it.12、Q: What do you call a bear with no teeth?A: A gummy bear.13、Q: What did the elephant say to the birthday cake? A: Nothing, it just gave it a big hug.14、Q: Why don vampires like going to parties?A: They don like to get sucked into conversations.15、Q: What did the bee say when it hit the window?A: Oh, buzz off!16、Q: Why did the scarecrow get promoted?A: Because he was outstanding in his field.17、Q: What did the barrel say to the other barrel?A: We can stand each other!18、Q: How do you make a hoodie laugh?A: Tell it a joke hoodie-style.19、Q: What did the duck say when he bought lipstick? A: Put it on my bill.20、Q: What do you call a bear with no teeth?A: A gummy bear.21、Q: why don astronauts play cards in space?A: Because they float away!22、Q: How do you make an octopus laugh?A: With ten-tickles.23、Q: What did the sheep say to the shepherd?A: Nothing, it just baa-ed.24、Q: What did the judge say when the skunk walked into the courtroom?A: Odor in the court!25、Q: What did the calculator say to the math book?A: You can count on me!26、Q: What did the helium balloon say to the air?A: Nothing, it just let out a little squeak.27、Q: What did the computer say when it crashed?A: Hey, I having a bad day!28、Q: What did the 0 say to the 8?A: Nice belt!29、Q: What did the paperclip say to the magnet?A: I find you very attractive.30、Q: What did the silverware say to the plate?A: You complete me!31、Q: What did the pirate say when he turned 80?A: Aye matey!32、Q: What did the light bulb say to the switch?A: You turn me on!33、Q: What did the big chimney say to the small chimney? A: You too young to smoke!34、Q: What did the clock say to the other clock?A: Don worry, I right behind you.35、Q: What did the bee say to the flower?A: I here to pollenate!36、Q: What did the teacher say to the pencil?A: You looking sharp!37、Q: What did the hamburger say to the hotdog?A: We make a great pair!38、Q: What did the rain say to the dirt?A: Let go make some mud pies!39、Q: What did the calculator say to the math book?A: You can count on me!40、Q: What did the fish say when it hit the wall?A: Dam!41、Q: What did the elephant say to the birthday cake? A: Nothing, it just gave it a big hug!42、Q: What did the cowboy say when he lost his horse? A: Howdy, saddle-less!43、Q: What did the alien say to the dad?A: Take me to your leader!44、Q: What did the hurricane say to the palm tree?A: Hold on to your leaves!45、Q: What did the bee say to the flower?A: I here to pollenate!46、Q: What did the carrot say to the rabbit?A: Let go for a hop!47、Q: What did the teacher say to the pencil?A: You looking sharp!48、Q: What did the rock say to the cliff?A: Hang in there!49、Q: What did the letter say to the envelope?A: Let stick together!50、Q: What did the mama bee say to her lazy bee?A: Wake up and Bee productive!51、Q: What did the cowboy say when he lost his horse? A: Howdy, saddle-less!52、Q: What did the egg say to the frying pan?A: You crack me up!53、Q: What did the key say to the lock?A: It so nice to see you again!54、Q: What did the snail say to the turtle?A: Hurry up!55、Q: What did the cowboy say to the cactus?A: How it hanging?56、Q: What did the doctor say to the patient?A: Take two aspirin and call me in the morning.57、Q: What did the bicycle say to the car?A: You may be faster, but I more fun!58、Q: What did the two antennas say to each other? A: You look good, girl!59、Q: What did the octopus say to the philosopher? A: I think, therefore I am eight!60、Q: What did the big hand say to the little hand? A: Let get to work!61、Q: What did the tomato say to the other tomato? A: You looking a little red today.62、Q: What did the duck say to the waiter?A: Put it on my bill.63、Q: What did the bee say to the flower?A: I here to pollenate!A: Bee yourself!65、Q: What did the bird say to the worm?A: Worm your way out!66、Q: What did the fish say to the whale?A: You a big fish in a small pond.67、Q: What did the paper say to the pencil?A: Write on me!68、Q: What did the teapot say to the cup?A: Time for a cup of tea!69、Q: What did the bee say to the flower?A: Buzz off!70、Q: What did the noodle say to the other noodle? A: Let have a pasta party!71、Q: What did the alarm clock say to the bed?A: Time to wake up!72、Q: What did the tree say to the wind?A: Leaf me alone!73、Q: What did the tree say to the other tree?A: What a re-leaf!74、Q: What did the fish say when it hit the wall? A: Dam!A: You looking sharp!76、Q: What did the calculator say to the math book?A: Let work it out!77、Q: What did the bird say to the worm?A: Wanna come out and play?78、Q: What did the elephant say to the mouse?A: You so tiny!79、Q: What did the bee say to the other bee?A: Let make honey!80、Q: What did the bee say to the flower?A: Smell me!81、Q: What did the frog say to the fly?A: Time for dinner!82、Q: What did the pizza say to the oven?A: Let get cooking!83、Q: What did the fish say when it saw a boat?A: That a big hook!84、Q: What did the elephant say when he saw the mouse? A: That tiny!85、Q: What did the skeleton say to the other skeleton? A: We have a lot in common!86、Q: What did the ball say to the other ball?A: Let play catch!87、Q: What did the bee say to the flower?A: Bee mine!88、Q: What did the ice cream cone say to the other ice cream cone?A: Let have a scoop!89、Q: What did the tree say to the axe?A: Chop chop!90、Q: What did the pencil say to the eraser?A: Let work it out!91、Q: What did the horse say when it tripped?A: Neigh!92、Q: What did the scarecrow say when it got promoted? A: I outstanding in my field!93、Q: What did the pelican say to the other pelican? A: Let go for a dive!94、Q: What did the bee say to the other bee?A: Hey, bee-friend!95、Q: What did the bee say to the flower?A: Let make honey!96、Q: What did the lightbulb say to the switch?A: You turn me on!97、Q: What did the firefly say to the other firefly? A: Let light up the night!98、Q: What did the bee say to the flower?A: Smell me!99、Q: What did the spider say to the fly?A: You in my web now!100、Q: What did the bee say to the beekeeper?A: Let me out of this hive!从上述100个英语幽默小笑话可以看出,英语幽默小笑话涵盖了生活中的各种场景,不论是小动物、植物、机械还是自然现象,都能以机智、幽默、搞笑的方式进行描述。

学习简单的英文笑话

学习简单的英文笑话

学习简单的英文笑话英语作为一门国际语言,对于日常交流和职场发展都有着重要的作用。

除了学习英文的正式语言和用法,学习一些简单的英文笑话也是很有趣和有助于提高英语水平的方式。

下面将分享一些简单的英文笑话,希望能给大家带来欢乐和学习的动力。

1. Why did the scarecrow win an award?Because he was outstanding in his field!为什么稻草人获得了奖项?因为他在自己的领域表现出色!2. I used to play piano by ear.Now I use my hands.以前我靠听力弹钢琴。

现在我靠双手弹。

3. Why don't scientists trust atoms?Because they make up everything!为什么科学家不相信原子?因为它们构成了一切!4. How do you organize a space party?You just planet!怎样才能办一个太空派对?你只要把行星安排好!5. What did one wall say to the other wall?I'll meet you at the corner!一堵墙对另一堵墙说什么?我将在拐角处与你会面!6. Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?It was two-tired!自行车为什么不能独立站立?因为它累了!7. What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it just let out a little wine!被踩到的葡萄说了什么?什么都没有,它只是流出了一点葡萄酒!8. What did one ocean say to the other ocean?Nothing, they just waved!一个海洋对另一个海洋说什么?什么都没有,它们只是挥手示意!这些简单的英文笑话不仅语言简洁幽默,而且可以帮助我们理解英语中的双关语和幽默元素。

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