幽默的翻译,翻译的幽默

幽默的翻译，翻译的幽默

泛瑞翻译

想让幽默突破不同语言文字的隔阂，翻译者需要语言天赋和文学造诣，更重要的是，要有持之以恒的热情。

去年，澳大利亚某电视台的新闻主持人在翻译帮助下采访一名宗教领袖。为了活跃气氛，他以一个自以为高明的笑话作为开场白：“ 您走进比萨店，问：… 能为我做个比萨吗? 什么配料都要有。? ( Can you make me one with everything?)”不料对方目光呆滞、满脸茫然，让主持人在上万观众面前很是尴尬。这件事告诉我们，幽默翻译常有词不达意的风险。(译注：对以英语为母语的人来说，“Canyou make me one with everything?”有另一重意思：“可不可以让我天人合一?”显然，这位宗教领袖不谙此理)

过度解释往往适得其反

普林斯顿大学比较文学系法语教授戴维·贝洛斯说：“法国人很喜欢伍迪·艾伦的书，部分是因为翻译的创造性劳动，部分是因为运气。”他说，自己在会上没听到以“两个翻译走进一个酒吧”开头的、专门调侃三流翻译的笑话，但翻译不认真肯定会让你丢脸。

在新书《你耳朵里有条鱼吗：翻译及万物的意义》(Is That a Fish in Your

Ear?Translation and the Meaning of Everything)中，贝洛斯提到：跨语言传递幽默的秘诀在于：抛下完全忠实于原文的条条框框，努力找到跟源语言的效果一样的词句。只要把握这个标准，很多简单的妙语，从病态的到荒唐的，并不像以往理解的那么难翻译。

回复斯堪的那维亚国家的译者们关于“Negra Modelo”和“stomachstapling”等词语的翻译问题时，该书作者耐心地说：“没什么比过度解释对笑话的破坏更甚”。

理解作者才能事半功倍

若把时钟拨回几十年前，翻译如《邮差总按两次铃》(The Postman Always Rings)、《四个火枪手》(The Four Musketeers)这些古典色彩浓厚的书名时，忠于原文还算比较容易，如今，翻译那些俏皮前卫的可就难多了。出路似乎只有一条，那就是让故事有感染力。

然而，正如任何杰出的喜剧演员都懂得，直白的笑话并不等于喜剧的上品那样，要重新打造出马克·吐温和狄更斯那种魅力悠长的幽默感，比在平日闲聊时插科打诨更难。为了真正使读者笑得喷饭，你必须首先深入原作者的内心，然后才能召唤出轻松欢乐的氛围。

曾把《让你的家人穿上灯芯绒和牛仔布》带到巴西的文学家塞尔吉奥·弗拉克斯曼，在早期的草稿中一度不得要领，无论如何也没法再现原文的戏剧性。直到听了原作者戴维·赛达瑞斯在电台的讲座，弗拉克斯曼才“悟出了真味”，发明了巴西版的塞达瑞斯式幽默，用葡萄牙语告诉人们：“无情的幽默，也可以展示微笑的毒牙”。

“让自己在工作中笑出声”

在现实世界里，翻译人员当然有自由发挥的余地。前总统吉米·卡特访问波兰期间就因此吃过亏：某个“二把刀”翻译把他的一句奉承话译成了“我从肉体上渴望波兰人(I desire the Poles carnally)。”此后不久，卡特去日本某大学演讲时提及一则轶闻，听众席里马上爆发出雷鸣般的笑声。事后，当他问翻译，这个普通的笑话为何引发了那么不寻常的回应时，对方一板一眼地回答：“我告诉听众，…卡特总统正在讲有趣的故事，大家快点笑啊!?”

认真地说，怎样才能让幽默突破不同语言文字的隔阂呢?

专门翻译波斯文学的皇后学院英语系副教授罗杰·谢答拉特表示：“我们都在谈论各国同行彼此理解之艰难。你得成为艺术家，而且只从事能有所发现的工作。”也有与会者指出，最好的译者是从最热情的读者中来的。希腊文翻译家米尔西尼·加纳就说：“我感到，当译者在工作中笑出声的时候，幽默便能够传达出去了。”

但谁也不能否认，无论译者如何努力，相同的幽默故事，对跨文化背景的受众的感染力总归是有限的。

精编新CET6段落翻译(汉译英)练习及答案

精编新CET6段落翻译（汉译英）练习题每日一练，快速提高英语水平！第1篇练习时间：年月日耗时：分污染已成为问题，因为在当今人口越来越多，社会越来越工业化的世界上，人类正在污染他们居住的环境。许多科学家认为人类最大的错误是把发展和进步等同起来。现在人们以怀疑的态度看待“发展性”的产业，因为它们的副作用会破坏环境，破坏各种生命之间的关系。人口的增长导致对世界上有限的空气、水和土地的需求不断增长。伴随着人口增长的是越来越多的人渴望更高的生活水平。于是对电、水和商品的更大需求必然造成有更多的废物要处理。这个问题已经引起人们对生物及其环境的日益关注。许多人认为，人类没有尽快地解决这一问题，却只顾谋求私利，以致于到了无可挽救的地步以后才充分认识到这种兵贵神速。第2篇练习时间：年月日耗时：分人们对智力所指的有那些不同表现看法比较一致，而对这些表现如何进行解释和分类，意见就不那么一致了。但人们一般认为智力高的人在处理问题时能抓住要点，善于区分，能进行逻辑推理，和利用语言和数学符号。智力测试只能很粗地衡量孩子的学习能力，尤其是学习学校要求的东西的能力。智力测试并不能衡量一个人的个性，社会适应力，耐力性，劳动技能，或艺术才能。人们不认为能做到这些，当初也不是为这些目的设计的。批评智力测试不能做到这一些，就如同批评温度计不能测风速一样。既然对智力的评估是相对而言的，那么我们必须确保，在对我们的对像进行比较时，我们所使用的尺度能提供“有效的”或“公正的”比较。第3篇练习时间：年月日耗时：分目前全国有39所大学开设地理学位课程，但我从未看到广告上有招聘地理专业的大学毕业生的好工作。或是不是只有我一个人怀疑他们将回到学校教另一批学生的地理，而这些学生将来又去教更多的学生的地理？现在只有10所大学开设航天工程学位课程，考虑到飞机制造业一直在裁员的速度，还是这样做好。另一方面，由于缺少医生，全国的医院急诊室不得不纷纷关门。为什么？因为大学的医学院只能为申请攻读学位的一半人提供名额。对我说，来，时机已经成熟，就业部和教育部应当和名大学携手起来，改革我们的教育制度，使之更珍惜地使用学校的人才资源，学生的刻苦勤奋精神。而现在这些人才和努力都浪费在无人感兴趣的文凭和学位上。第4篇练习时间：年月日耗时：分在竞争的法则下，上万人的雇主不得不实行一些最严厉的节约措施，其中节约给工人报酬的那部分占很大一部分。社会为这个法则付出的代价如同为低廉的舒适条件和奢侈品付出的代价一样是巨大的。但带来的好处超过了代价，因为正是这个法则，我们才有了了不起的物质进步，其结果是生活水平的提高。但是，不管这个法则是好是坏，我们无法回避，对任何建议替代它的新东西，其作用我们是不敢肯定的，虽然这个法则有时对个人来说可能很残

段落翻译英文

1.China—US relationship is one of the most important bilateral relations in the world.Before China and the United States established diplomatic ties,the two countries often found themselves to be changing accusations and abuses.But that didn’t settle anything .Since the establishment of diplomatic ties,particularly since China’s accession to the WTO,the exchanges between China and the United States have become increasingly close and we have carried out frequent dialogues of various forms at all levels.While we did have a fair amount of bitter argument ,both of us had actually benefited from such exchanges.What has happened shows that to maintain long—term dialogue between our two big countries not only benefits the Chinese and American people,but also serves peace and development of the world. 2.The Summer Palace is regarded as the best—preserved imperial garden in the world,and is the largest of its kind in modern—day China.Situated in the northwestern outskirts of Beijing,the palace occupies an area of 290 hectares and consists mainly of Longevity Hill and Kunming Lack.In December 1998,UNESCO included the Summer Palace on its World Heritage List.It declared the Summer Palace an “outstanding expression of the creative art of Chinese Landscape Garden Design,incorporation the works of humankind and nature in a harmonious whole. 3.The Tang Dynasty,with its capital at Chang’an(present—day Xi’an),which at the time was the most populous city in the world,is generally regarded as a high point in Chinese civilization—equal to ,or surpassing that of ,the earlier Han Dynasty—a golden age of cosmopolitan culture .Its territory,acquired through the military campaigns of its early rulers,rivaled that of the Han Dynasty.In two censuses of the 7th and 8th centuries ,the Tang records estimated the population by number of registered households at about 500 million people. 4.This year marks the tenth anniversary of China’s accession to the WTO.During the decade,China’s average tariff level has dropped from 1 5.3 percent to 9.8 percent,which has reached or surpassed the WTO requirements for developing countries.In recent years ,China has developed its economy with focus on stabilizing prices ,adjusting the economic structure ,ensuring people’s well—being ,and promoting harmony.China maintains a balance between achieving steady and fast economic growth,adjusting the economic structure and managing inflation expectation.Continued steady and fast growth in China will serve the interest of global economic growth. 5.A key focus is expansion of domestic demand.Here China enjoys one great advantage :its 1.3bn people are keen to work hand in pursuit of a better life and make up a huge domestic market.We will expand consumer demand through initiatives such as the promotion of the IT sector through the expansion of broadband and 4G licences.While focusing on consumption,we will keep a reasonable scale of investment with priority given to energy conservation,environmental protection,railway projects in the central and western regions,and municipal facilities.

浅议英汉翻译中的幽默翻译

浅议英汉翻译中的幽默翻译【摘要】美国作家马克?吐温是著名的幽默大师，其文笔犀利，语言幽默，本文尝试用不同的方法来翻译其作品中不同类型的幽默语句，力求达到“形神兼备”的效果。【关键词】马克?吐温；翻译；普通幽默；文化幽默；直译；补偿策略；形神兼备汉语中原本无“幽默”一词，林语堂先生把“humor”翻译成“幽默”，此译将音、意合一，表达恰到好处。鲁迅先生曾说过：“中华民族是不善幽默的民族”，而西方人大多擅长幽默。在西方社交中，没有幽默感的人，会被认为乏味无趣，甚至不受欢迎。鉴于国人与欧美人在幽默感方面存在差异，在跨文化交际中幽默的领会与翻译就显得尤为重要。诚然，幽默翻译存在着种种困难，有时让人感觉真的是只可意会，不可言传。幽默翻译要做到“形神兼备”确实很困难。何为“形”？我们可以理解为保持其幽默形式或传递其幽默元素；何为“神”？我们可以理解为其中蕴含的真实信息。日常生活中，有些幽默可能是纯粹为了逗乐或博笑，那我们就要传递其幽默元素，让目的语读者能体会到其幽默所在甚至为之发笑。但有些幽默可能就不是纯粹为了逗乐或博笑，而是以一种轻

松的形式来引发读者深刻的思考，让人掩卷深思笑声背后的东西。那我们翻译此类幽默时首先要传递其信息内容，其次才是传递的其幽默元素。幽默总体可分为言语幽默和非言语幽默两大类，此处我们讨论的是言语幽默的翻译，而我们又可将言语幽默分为普通幽默、文化幽默和语言幽默。如何翻译这三类幽默呢？笔者认为普通幽默翻译相对要容易些，一般采取直译的方法便可达到“形神兼备”的效果；文化幽默和语言幽默翻译相对较难，在直译难以奏效的情况下，笔者建议采取补偿策略或归化策略。一、马克?吐温作品中的普通幽默翻译马克?吐温作品中的幽默语句俯拾皆是，例如： “We were as happy as we were poor，or as poor as we were happy――phrase it to suit yourself”.[1] “我们有多贫穷就有多开心，或者说我们有多开心就有多贫穷――随你怎么说”。此处，“贫穷”与“开心”形成了鲜明的对比，我们不也经常说“穷开心”嘛，多么的异曲同工！ “The sight of a tailor-shop gave me a sharp longing to discard my rags，and to dress myself decently once more. Could I afford it？No；I had nothing in the world but a million pounds”.[2]

英语幽默笑话带翻译新精编版

英语幽默笑话带翻译新 GE GROUP system office room 【GEIHUA16H-GEIHUA GEIHUA8Q8-

英语幽默笑话带翻译 1:A man was hit by a cab in the street. He was brought to the hospital. His wife who was standing up by his bed, said to the doctor: "I think that he is very ill." "I am afraid that he is dead." said the doctor, Hearing this, the man moved his head and said: "I'm not dead. I'm still alive." "Be quiet, "said the wife. "the doctor knows better than you!" 医生懂得多一个男人在街上被出租车撞倒送进了医院.他的妻子站在他的床前对医生说:"我想他伤得很厉害."医生说:"我怕他已经死了."听到医生的话,这个男人转动着头说:"我没死,我还活着."妻子说:"安静,医生比你懂得多." 2:You can't go without me The bus is very crowded. A man tries to get on, but no one gives way to him. "Hey, let me get on the bus." the man shouts. "It's too crowded. You'd better take the next bus." a passenger says to him. "But you can't go without me. I'm the driver." the man says. 没有我你们走不了公共汽车上很拥挤.一位男士想上车,但是没有人给他让路.

四级段落翻译训练答案

假日经济的现象表明：中国消费者的消费观正在发生巨大变化。根据统计数据，中国消费者的消费需求正在从基本生活必需品转向对休闲、舒适和个人发展的需求。同时，中国人的消费观在蓬勃发展的假日经济中正变得成熟。因此产品结构应做相应调整，来适应社会的发展。另一方面，服务质量要改善以满足人们提高生活质量的要求。 The phenomenon of holiday economy shows that Chinese people’s consumption concept is undertaking great changes. According to statistics, the demands of Chinese consumers are shifting from the basic necessities of life to leisure, comfort and personal development.Meanwhile, Chinese consumption concepts are getting mature along with the thriving holiday economy.Therefore, the structure of products should be adjusted accordingly to adapt to social development. On the other hand, services should be improved to satisfy people’s demand for an improved quality of life. 今晚，我们很高兴在北京大学在此接待我们的老朋友格林博士和夫人。我代表学校的全体师生员工，向格林博士和夫人以及其他新西兰贵宾，表示热烈的欢迎。我相信格林博士这次对我校的访问必将为进一步加强两校的友好合作关系作出重要的贡献。明天贵宾们将要赴南京和上海访问，我预祝大家一路顺风。 It gives us great pleasure to play host tonight to our old friends：Dr. and Mrs. Green in Beijing.On behalf of the faculty, students and staff of the university, I wish to extend our warm welcome to Dr. and Mrs. Green and other distinguished New Zealand guests. I am convinced that Dr. Green’s current visit to our university will surely make an important contribution to further strengthening the friendly relations and cooperation between our two universities.Our distinguished guests will leave for Nanjing and Shanghai tomorrow. I wish you all a pleasant journey. 中国的传统节庆膳食是节日必不可少的伴侣。例如，我国的端午节(the Dragon Boat Festival)是纪念古代诗人屈原的日子。那一天，人们通常要赛龙舟、吃粽子(zongzi)。中秋节是观赏满月的日子。圆圆的月亮象征着圆满，象征着家庭团聚。因此，中秋节的特制食品是一种圆形的月饼。春节是中国的农历新年(the Chinese lunar New Year)，除了常见的肉类、海鲜之外，人们还要按各自的地方习俗烹制传统食物，如饺子。 Traditional Chinese holiday meals are indispensable to some festivals.For example, the Dragon Boat Festival is a day established in memory of the ancient poet Qu Yuan and people usually hold dragon boat races and eat zongzi, or rice dumpling on that day.The Mid-autumn Festival is an occasion for viewing the full moon. The round moon is a symbol of completeness and family reunion. The special food of the day is yuebing, a round cake known as the mooncake.The Spring Festival is the Chinese lunar New Year’s holiday. Besides the popular meat and seafood, people cook traditional food, for example, Jiaozi, according to regional customs. 端午节，又叫龙舟节，是为了纪念爱国诗人屈原。屈原是一位忠诚和受人敬仰的大臣（minister）,他给国家带来了和平和繁荣。但最后因为受到诽谤（vilify）而最终投河自尽。人们撑船到他自尽的地方，抛下粽子，希望鱼儿吃粽子，不要吃屈原的身躯。几千年来，端午节的特色在于吃粽子（glutinous dumplings）和赛龙舟，尤其是在一些河湖密布的南方省份。 The Duanwu Festival, also called the Dragon Boat Festival, is to commemorate the patriotic poet Qu Yuan. Qu Yuan was a loyal and highly esteemed minister, who brought peace and prosperity to the state but ended up drowning himself in a river as a result of being vilified. People got to the spot by boat and cast glutinous dumplings into the water, hoping that the fishes ate the dumplings instead of Qu Yuan’s body. For thousands of years, the festival has been marked by glutinous dumplings and dragon boat races, especially in the southern provinces where there are many rivers and lakes.

英语幽默小故事10篇(带翻译)

英语幽默小故事10篇(带翻译) 线话英语|2016-03-14 17:03:05 英语幽默小故事10篇(带翻译)如下： Midway Tactics Three competing store owners rented adjoining shops in a mall. Observers waited for mayhem to ensue. The retailer on the right put up huge signs saying, "Gigantic Sale!" and "Super Bargains!" The store on the left raised bigger signs proclaiming, "Prices Slashed!" and "Fantastic Discounts!" The owner in the middle then prepared a large sign that simply stated, "ENTRANCE".

中间战术三个互相争生意的商店老板在一条商业街上租用了毗邻的店铺。旁观者等着瞧好戏。右边的零售商挂起了巨大的招牌，上书：“大减价!”“特便宜!” 左边的商店挂出了更大的招牌，声称：“大砍价!”“大折扣!” 中间的商人随后准备了一个大招牌，上面只简单地写着：“入口处”。 Very Pleased to Meet You During World War II, a lot of young women in Britain were in the army. Joan Phillips was one of them. She worked in a big camp, and of course met a lot of men, officers and soldiers. One evening she met Captain Humphreys at a dance. He said to her, "I’m going abroad tomorrow, but I‘d be very happy if we could write to each other." Joan agreed, and they wrote for several months. Then his letters stopped, but she received one from another officer, telling her that he had been wounded and was in a certain army hospital in England. Joan went there and said to the matron, "I‘ve come to visit Captain Humphreys." "Only relatives are allowed to visit patients here," the matron said. "Oh, that‘s all right," answered Joan. "I‘m his sister." "I‘m very pleased to meet you," the matron said, "I‘m his mother!" 在第二次世界大战中，有许多年轻的妇女在军营中服役。琼.飞利浦斯是其中之一。她在一个大军营中工作，当然遇到了许多男士，包括军官和士兵。

超搞笑翻译笑死不偿命

超搞笑翻译笑死不偿命 1．we two who and who？咱俩谁跟谁阿 2．how are you ? how old are you? 怎么是你，怎么老是你？ 3．you don't bird me,I don't bird you 你不鸟我，我也不鸟你 4．you have seed I will give you some color to see see,brothers ！together up ！你有种，我要给你点颜色瞧瞧，兄弟们，一起上！ 5．hello everybody!if you have something to say,then say!if you have nothing to say,go ho me!! 有事起奏，无事退朝 6．you me you me 彼此彼此 7．You Give Me Stop!! 你给我站住！ 8．know is know noknow is noknow 知之为知之，不知为不知... 9．WATCH SISTER 表妹 10．dragon born dragon,chicken born chicken,mouse' son can make hole!! 龙生龙，凤生凤，老鼠的儿子大地洞 11．American Chinese not enough 美中不足 12．one car come one car go ,two car pengpeng,people die 车祸现场描述 13．heart flower angry open

心花怒放 14．go past no mistake past 走过路过，不要错过 15．小明：I am sorry! 老外：I am sorry too! 小明：I am sorry three! 老外：What are you sorry for? 小明：I am sorry five! 16．If you want money,I have no;if you want life,I have one! 要钱没有，要命一条 17．I call Li old big. toyear 25. 我叫李老大，今年25。 18．you have two down son。你有两下子。 19．as far as you go to die 有多远，死多远！！！！ 20．I give you face you don''t wanna face,you lose you face ,I turn my face 给你脸你不要脸，你丢脸，我翻脸

段落翻译答案(1)

参考答案 1. Originated from Beijing some 200 years ago during the Qing Dynasty, Beijing Opera is a performing art that embraces opera performance, singing, music, dancing and martial arts. Since Mei Lanfang, the grand master of Peking Opera, visited Japan in 1919, it has become more and more popular with people all over the world. Peking Opera House of Beijing has been invited to perform in many countries and highly appreciated by foreign audiences. The performance has made an outstanding contribution to Sino-foreign cultural exchange and to the promotion of friendly association of peoples in the world. 解析：第一句中的起源于200年前清朝时期的北京可提前翻译，用过去分词作状语的结构，既符合英语的表达习惯，有突出后面主句的含义。此外，汉语的“的”字句可以转换为英语的定语从句，因此主句可以简化成“集---于一体的表演艺术”时，翻译时把“表演艺术”提前，把“的”字句转化为that 引导的定语从句。“集---于一体”可以理解为“包含”，不必逐字翻译。 2. The Mid-Autumn Festival, which falls on the 15th day of the eighth lunar month, is one of the traditional festivals in China. According to Chinese lunar calendar, the 15th day of the eighth month is the exact midst of autumn, so it is called the Mid-Autumn Festival. The Festival is an evening celebration (名词短语代替动词被动句，避免与前句的被动句重复)when families gather together to light lanterns, eat moon cakes and appreciate the round moon. On that night, the moon appears to be at its roundest and brightest. The full moon is a symbol for family reunion, which is why that day is also known as the Festival of Reunion. Like other traditional festivals, the Mid-Autumn Festival also has a long history, evolved gradually with the passage of time.用with的伴随结构增译“随着时间流逝”这层含义。

英语段落翻译

The patient-physician interaction proceeds through many pases of clinical reasoning and decision making . The interaction begins with an elucidation of complaints or concerns , followed by inquiries or physical examination , ordering of diagnostic tests , integration of clinical findings with the test results , understanding of the risks and benefits of the possible courses of action , and careful consultation with the patient and family to develop future plans . Physicians increasingly can call on a growing literature of evidence-based medicine to guide the process so that benefit is maximized , while respecting individual variations among different patients. 医患沟通贯穿于临床推论和临床决策的各个阶段.医患沟通始于主诉的阐述或关心的表达,并以越来越精确的方式,通过学问或评估得以继续,这一过程通常需要仔细的病史(采集)和体格检查,安排诊断性实验,并使实验结果与临床发现一体化,以及对可能所采取行动的风险和好处的理解，与病人及其家庭之间细致的商讨以产生将来的计划。医生越来越（趋于）访问日益增多的循证医学文献去指导这个过程，以使取得最大的收益，同时对于不同的病人充分考虑个体的不同变化。 Chapter 8 第四段 Fourth , cognitive impairment increases in prominence as people age. Cognitive impairment is a risk factor for a wide range of adverse outcomes ,including falls , immobilization , dependency , institutionalization , and mortality . Cognitive impairment complicates diagosis and requires additional care giving to ensure safety . Chapter 21 第六段 A new device for visualizing the entire gastrointestinal mucosa consists of a small camera in an ingestable capsule that transmits images to receivers attached to the patient~s abdomen diagnostic yield of capsule enteroscopy is not yet clear,but this approach may potentially visualize segments of the small bowel that were previously inaccessible . No therapeutic maneuvers are possible with the device.

幽默趣味搞笑英语口语趣味翻译

幽默趣味搞笑英语口语趣味翻译集团文件发布号：（9816-UATWW-MWUB-WUNN-INNUL-DQQTY-

幽默趣味搞笑英语口语大全 ●Behind every successful man, there is a woman. And behind ev ery unsuccessful man, there are two. 每个成功男人的背后, 都有一个女人. 每个不成功男人的背后, 都有两个。 ●Money is not everything. There's Mastercard & Visa. 钞票不是万能的，有时还需要信用卡。 ● One should love animals. They are so tasty. 每个人都应该热爱动物，因为它们很好吃。 ● Save water. Shower with your girlfriend. 要节约用水，尽量和女友一起洗澡。 ●Every man should marry. After all, happiness is not the only thing in life. 再快乐的单身汉迟早也会结婚，幸福不是永久的嘛。 ●The wise never marry, And when they marry they become otherwise. 聪明人都是未婚的，结婚的人很难再聪明起来。 ●Success is a relative term. It brings so many relatives. 成功是一个相关名词，他会给你带来很多不相关的亲戚（联系）。 ●Love is photogenic. It needs darkness to develop. 爱情就象照片，需要大量的暗房时间来培养。

短篇英语笑话10则带翻译

短篇英语笑话10则带翻译 ①Goldfish金鱼 Stan: I won 92 goldfish. Fred: Where are you going to keep them? Stan: In the bathroom 。 Fred: But what will you do when you want to take a bath? Stan: Blindfold（蒙眼睛）them! =================================================================== 斯丹：我赢了92 条金鱼。弗雷德：你想在哪儿养它们？斯丹：浴室。弗雷德：但是你想洗澡时怎么办？斯丹：蒙住它们的眼睛！ ②The Revenge 欺骗的代价 Old Farmer Johnson was dying. The family was standing around his bed. With a low voice he said to his wife: "When I'm dead I want you to marry farmer Jones." Wife: "No, I can't marry anyone after you." Johnson: "But I want you to." Wife: "But why?" Johnson: "Jones once cheated me in a horse deal!" =================================================================== 老农约翰逊就要死了。他的家人都站在床边。他声音低沉地对妻子说：“我死后，我想你嫁给农夫琼斯。” 妻子说：“不，在你死后，我不能嫁给任何人。” 约翰逊：“但我希望你这么做。” 妻子：“为什么？” 约翰逊：“因为琼斯曾在一笔贩马的交易中欺骗了我。” ③I think that I'm a chicken 我想我是一只鸡 Psychiatrist: What's your problem? Patient: I think I'm a chicken. Psychiatrist: How long has this been going on? Patient: Ever since I was an egg! =================================================================== 精神病医师：你哪里不舒服？病人：我认为我是一只鸡。精神病医师：这种情况从什么时候开始的？病人：从我还是一只蛋的时候开始。 ④How do I get the gum out我怎么把口香糖取出来 Distributing chewing gum to the passengers, the stewardess explained it was to keep their ears from popping. When the plane landed, one of the passengers rushed up to her and said, "I'm meeting my wife right away. How do I get the gum out from my ears?" =================================================================== 当空中小姐给乘客们发口香糖的时候，她解释说口香糖有助于他们防止耳鸣。飞机着陆后，一位乘客跑到这位空中小姐面前，说道：“ 我马上就要见到我妻子了。我怎么才能把口香糖从耳朵里面取出来呢？”