英语幽默小故事
2023年最新的英语幽默小故事10篇

2023年最新的英语幽默小故事10篇1Mr. Jones had a few days’ holiday, so he said, “I’m going to go to the mountains by train.” He put on his best clothes, took a small bag, went to the station and got on the train. He had a beautiful hat, and he often put his head out of the window during the trip and looked at the mountains. But the wind pulled his hat off.Mr. Jones quickly took his old bag and threw that out of the window too.The other people in the carriage laughed. “Is your bag going to bring your beautiful hat back” they ask ed.“No,” Mr. Jones answered, “but there’s no name and no addressin my hat, and there’s a name and address on the bag. Someone’s going to find both of them near each other, and he’s going to send me the bag and the hat.”琼斯先生有几天的假期,所以他说,“我要去山上的火车。
”他穿上他最好的衣服,拿了一个小袋子,去了火车站,上了火车。
他有一顶漂亮的帽子,他经常把他的头伸出车窗去看山。
英语幽默小故事6篇

1、Good use of cry 哭的妙用The parents with their three-year-old son went to see film.When they walked into the cinema, the attendant said to them,“you’ll have to go out if your son cries. But we’ll refundyou the tickets.” About half an hour later, the husbandasked his wife, “What do you think of the film?”“I’ve never seen such a boring film.” His wife answered.“It’s not worth seeing.”“I don’t think much of it, either.” The husband said.“Wake the child up and let him cry.”一对夫妇带着他们3岁的儿子去看电影。
进电影院时,服务员对他们说:“如果你们的儿子哭了,你们就得出去。
不过我们会给你们退票的。
”大约半个小时以后,丈夫对妻子说:“你觉得这电影怎么样?”“我从没看过这么没劲的电影。
”妻子回答说,“真不值得看。
”“我也不喜欢看。
”丈夫说:“叫醒孩子,让他哭。
”2、What a Smart Wife家有笨妻A newly married woman was sitting on a chair,looking vexed, when her husband came home."What's up? Why do you look so troubled?"the husband asked. The woman replied,"I'm so sorry. I was ironing your new suit andburned a hole in your trousers." And the man said,"That's all right. I have another pair that is exactly the same.""Thank God you do. I used it to mend this pair,"the wife responded.有一个刚结婚的太太,坐在椅子那边,看起来很懊恼,她先生回家看到她这个样子,就问:‘嗨,你怎么啦?为什么看起来这么懊恼呢?’太太说:‘很抱歉,你那件新做的西装裤被我烫坏了,烫成一个洞了。
英语幽默小故事

英语幽默小故事英语幽默小故事(Humorous English Stories)英语幽默小故事是指那些融入了幽默元素的,令人发笑的、趣味横生的故事。
这些故事往往可以轻松地让人们放松心情,以轻鬆愉快的方式学习英语,增强学习兴趣,提高英语水平。
以下是一些英语幽默小故事,欢迎各位读者阅读。
故事一:The Blind Man and the Fish一条盲鱼夹在一群鱼中间游,在它身旁的一位失明男子问:“鱼啊,你好吗?”“我很好,谢谢您,”鱼回答道:“你想知道其他鱼怎么样吗?”故事二:The Clever Chef旅馆的厨师在晚饭时,上了一盘煮熟的翅膀,但是所有的客人都觉得味道不对。
客人们投诉后,厨师想要一试,品尝后失声惊叫,原来厨师把旅馆老板的卡特车修理的机油加到翅膀里面煮,虽然味道奇特,但确实是高效率的“润滑油”。
故事三:The Secret to Happiness一个医生告诉一个病人,如果他想保持健康和幸福,就应该每天早晨起床时,抱住自己,唱一首赞美之歌,“我就是我,我很棒!”病人试着练习后,很快恢复了健康,找到了幸福。
故事四:The Wise Monkey一个猴子在树上看着一个两个人争吵,最终分不清谁对谁错。
于是这只猴子提议:“为什么不让我来当调解人呢?我将一半的苹果给你,另一半给你,以此来解决这个问题。
”一个人高兴地把自己那半苹果递给了猴子,而另一个人也高兴地接下了自己的那半苹果。
于是猴子便坐下来自己吃了整个苹果。
故事五:The Onions有个瞎眼老人走进了一家餐馆,要了一碗洋葱汤,一口一口地喝着,接下来餐馆里的每个人都一个一个传染性地开了哭泣。
老人停下来,问:“这是怎么回事?”餐馆老板笑着回答:“你切的洋葱让大家哭了出来。
”以上是一些英语幽默小故事,希望这些故事为大家带来欢乐和帮助。
通过这些小故事,人们可以轻松愉快地掌握和学习英语,从而更快地提高英语水平。
20个英语笑话爆笑超短 [有关英语笑话故事带翻译]
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20个英语笑话爆笑超短 [有关英语笑话故事带翻译]英语笑话作为一种城市化的民间口头创作体裁,是一种重要的交际手段。
本文是有关英语笑话故事带翻译,希望对大家有帮助!Two old friends got together after many years and soon fell to discussing their husbands' faults."We've been married fifteen years," one woman said, "and every night after dinner my husband always complains about the food.""How terrible!" exclaimed the other. "Does it bother you?""Why should it bother me?" her friend replied. "if he can't only stand his own cooking?"现代生活两个老朋友分别多年之后又见面了,很快就开始谈起各自丈夫的缺点。
“我们结婚十五年了,”一个妇女说道,“每天晚饭后,我丈夫总要抱怨饭菜。
”“真可恶!”另一个惊呼道。
“难道你不烦吗?”“我烦什么?”她的朋友答道。
“他不过是忍受不了自己的烹调技术。
”When a group of women got on the car, every seat was already occupied. The conductor noticed a man who seemed to be asleep,and fearing he might miss his stop, he nudged him and said: "Wake up, sir!""I wasn't asleep," the man answered."Not asleep? But you had your eyes closed.""I know. I just hate to look at ladies standing up beside me in a crowded car."我没有睡着当一群妇女上车之后,车上的座位全都被占满了。
英语幽默小故事三篇

英语幽默小故事三篇英语幽默小故事(1)Midway TacticsThree competing store owners rented adjoining shops in a mall. Observers waited for mayhem to ensue.The retailer on the right put up huge signs saying, "Gigantic Sale!" and "Super Bargains!"The store on the left raised bigger signs proclaiming, "Prices Slashed!" and "Fantastic Discounts!"The owner in the middle then prepared a large sign that simply stated, "ENTRANCE".中间战术三个互相争生意的商店老板在一条商业街上租用了毗邻的店铺。
旁观者等着瞧好戏。
右边的零售商挂起了巨大的招牌,上书:“大减价!”“特便宜!”左边的商店挂出了更大的招牌,声称:“大砍价!”“大折扣!”中间的商人随后准备了一个大招牌,上面只简单地写着:“入口处”。
英语幽默小故事(2)Five Months OlderThe Second World War had begun, and John wanted to join the army, but he was only 16 years old, and boys were allowed to join only if they were over 18. So when the army doctor examined him, he said that he was 18.But John‘s brother had joined the army a few days before,and the same doctor had examined him too. This doctor remembered the older boy‘s family name, so when he sawJohn‘s papers, he was surprised."How old are you?" he said."Eighteen, sir," said John."But your brother was eighteen, too," said the doctor. "Are you twins?""Oh, no, sir," said John, and his face went red. "My brother is five months older than I am."大五个月第二次世界大战开始了,约翰想参军,可他只有十六岁,当时规定男孩到十八岁才能入伍。
英语幽默小故事带翻译

安妮:亲爱的,一点也不,不管是谁留给你钱,我都会爱你。
故事三:The Blind Man(盲人)
A blind man walks into a store with his seeing-eye dog. All of a sudden, he picks up the leash and begins swinging the dog over his head.
经理跑过去问那个男人,“你在干什么?!”
盲人回答,“我只是想看看周围。”
故事四:The Art of Conversation(交谈的艺术)
Teacher: “Can anyone give me three points of similarity between a giraffe and a refrigerator?”
英语幽默小故事带翻译
故事一:The Interview(面试)
John went for an interview at a big company. After the interview, the HR manager said, “You are very suitable for the job. But I'm afraid you won't be able to start until Monday.”
The manager runs up to the man and asks, “What are you doing?!”
The blind man responds, “Just looking around.”
翻译:一个盲人带着导盲犬走进一家商店。突然间,他抓起狗的牵引绳开始把狗甩到头顶上。
三分钟英语幽默小故事三篇

【导语】⼀些幽默的英语故事,能提⾼我们阅读英语的兴趣,从⽽提⾼英语的阅读能⼒。
下⾯是⽆忧考分享的三分钟英语幽默⼩故事三篇。
欢迎阅读参考! 三分钟英语幽默⼩故事篇⼀ 推理a fourth-grade teacher was diving her pupils a lesson in logic.”here is the situation,"she said.”a man is standing up in a boat in the middle of a river,fishing. he loses his balance,falls in, and begins splashing and yelling for help.his wife hears the commotion, knows he can't swim, and runs down to the bank. why do you think she ran to the bank?"⼩学四年级的教师在给学⽣们讲逻辑学。
“有这样⼀种情况。
”她说:“⼀个男⼈站在河中⼼的⼀条船上钓鱼。
他突然失去重⼼,掉进了⽔⾥。
于是,他开始挣扎并呼喊救命。
他的妻⼦听到了他的喊声,知道他不会游泳,所以她就急忙跑向bank。
请你们告诉我这是为什么?”a girl raised her hand and asked, "to draw out all of his savings?"⼀个⼥学⽣举起⼿答道:“是不是去取他的存钱?” 三分钟英语幽默⼩故事篇⼆ 训兽童a boy of about ten was sitting on a city bus with a briefcase on his lap. periodically the youngster would whisper into his coat.a woman passenger caught his eye with a quizzical look and,in response,the boy produced a small white mouse from his shirt pocket.”he's just a baby."explained the youngster. "his parents are in here. "opening his briefcase,he brought forth a pair of slightly larger. white mice from among a dozen or so that scurried around inside. by this time several other passengers had formed an audience, and the boy patiently explained his interest in mice,how to take care of them, their eating habits, their different personalities and so on.⼀位⼗岁的男孩腿上放着会⽂箱,正坐在⼀辆城市公共汽车上。
英语幽默小故事10篇

英语幽默小故事10篇(带翻译)如下:Midway TacticsThree competing store owners rented adjoining shops in a mall. Observers waited for mayhem to ensue.The retailer on the right put up huge signs saying, "Gigantic Sale!" and "Super Bargains!"The store on the left raised bigger signs proclaiming, "Prices Slashed!" and "Fantastic Discounts!"The owner in the middle then prepared a large sign that simply stated, "ENTRANCE".中间战术三个互相争生意的商店老板在一条商业街上租用了毗邻的店铺。
旁观者等着瞧好戏。
右边的零售商挂起了巨大的招牌,上书:“大减价!”“特便宜!”左边的商店挂出了更大的招牌,声称:“大砍价!”“大折扣!”中间的商人随后准备了一个大招牌,上面只简单地写着:“入口处”。
V ery Pleased to Meet YouDuring World War II, a lot of young women in Britain were in the army. Joan Phillips was one of them. She worked in a big camp, and of course met a lot of men, officers and soldiers.One evening she met Captain Humphreys at a dance. He said to her, "I‘m going abroad tomorrow, but I‘d be very happy if we could write to each other." Joan agreed, and they wrote for several months.Then his letters stopped, but she received one from another officer, telling her that he had been wounded and was in a certain army hospital in England.Joan went there and said to the matron, "I‘ve come to visit Captain Humphreys.""Only relatives are allowed to visit patients here," the matron said."Oh, that‘s all right," answered Joan. "I‘m his sister.""I‘m very pleased to meet you," the matron said, "I‘m his mother!"在第二次世界大战中,有许多年轻的妇女在军营中服役。
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英语幽默小故事1、New DiscoveryA hillbilly was visiting the big city for the first time. Entering an office building, he saw a pudgy older woman step into a small room. The doors closed, lights flashed, and after a while the door slid open and a beautiful youngmodel stepped off the elevator.Blinking in amazement, the hillbilly drawled, "I shouldhave brought my wife!"新发现一个乡下人第一次到大城市游逛。
他走进一座大楼,看见一个岁数很大的矮胖女人迈进一个小房间。
房间的门随后关上,有几个灯在闪亮。
一会儿,门开了,电梯里走出一位年青漂亮的女模特。
乡下人惊奇地眨着眼睛,慢吞吞地说:“我应该把我的老婆带来!”hillbillyn. 乡下人,乡巴佬.pudgyadj.矮胖的,矮而粗的drawlvt, vi慢吞吞地说;拉长语调地说2、Always Thirsty"I had an operation," said a man to his friend, "and the doctor left a sponge in me.""That's terrible!" said the friend. "Got any pain?""No, but I am always thirsty!"总感到口渴一个男人对他的朋友说:“我动了一次手术,手术后医生把一块海绵忘在我的身体里了。
”“真是太糟糕了!”朋友说道:“你觉得疼吗?”“不疼,可是我总感到口渴。
”He WonTommy: How is your little brother, Johnny? Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself.Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen?Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won.他赢了汤姆:约翰尼,你小弟弟好吗?约翰尼:他害病卧床了。
他受了伤。
汤姆:真糟糕,怎么回事儿?约翰尼:我们做游戏,看谁能把身子探出窗外最远,他赢了。
I Have His Ear in My PocketIvan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?""A kid bit me," replied Ivan."Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother."I'd know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket."他的耳朵在我衣兜里伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。
他妈妈问,“发生了什么事?”“一个男孩咬了我一口,”伊凡说。
“再见到他你能认出来吗?”妈妈问。
“他走到哪里我都能认出他,”伊凡说。
“他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢。
”A Good BoyLittle Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?""I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered."You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?""She is the one who sells the candy."好孩子小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。
“昨天给你的钱干什么了?”“我给了一个可怜的老太婆,”他回答说。
“你真是个好孩子,”妈妈骄傲地说。
“再给你两分钱。
可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢?”“她是个卖糖果的。
”DrunkOne day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk.""But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!"醉酒一天,父亲与小儿子一道回家。
这个孩子正处于那种对什么事都很感兴趣的年龄,老是有提不完的问题。
他向父亲发问道:“爸爸,‘醉’字是什么意思?” “唔,孩子,”父亲回答说,“你瞧那儿站着两个警察。
如果我把他们看成了四个,那么我就算醉了。
” “可是,爸爸,”孩子说,“那儿只有一个警察呀!”HospitalityThe hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-pie without any cheese. The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest's plate. The visitor smiled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said: "You must have better eyes than your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese?" "In the rat-trap, sir," replied the boy.好客由于客人在吃苹果馅饼时,家里没有奶酪了,于是女主人向大家表示歉意。
这家的小男孩悄悄地离开了屋子。
过了一会儿,他拿着一片奶酪回到房间,把奶酪放在客人的盘子里。
客人微笑着把奶酪放进嘴里说:“孩子,你的眼睛就是比你妈妈的好。
你在哪里找到的奶酪?” “在捕鼠夹上,先生。
”那小男孩说。
英语小笑话上个星期五我穿了一件Adidas 的衣服去打球, 一个老美看到就笑我说, "Do youknow what does it mean? It means All Day I Dream About Sex.我整天都在想著性, 缩写正好是Adidas) " 我正惊讶他怎么反应这么快, 联想力这么丰富时,旁边的一个老美帮我解围, 他说, 有一个很著名的合唱团Korn, 他们的招牌歌之一就是A.D.I.D.A.S, (All day I dream about sex)所以呢,这个典故可是很多老美都耳熟能详的喔! 下次就换你去取笑老美了.A man goes to church and starts talking to God. He says: "God, what is a million dollars to you?" and God says: "A penny", then the man says: "God, what is a million years to you?" and God says: "a second", then the man says: "God, can I have a penny?" and God says "In a second"一男子进入教堂和上帝对话.他问:"主啊, 一百万美元对你意味着多少?"上帝回答:"一便士."男子又问:"且话偻蚰昴?"上帝说:"一秒钟."最后男子请求道:"上帝,我能得到一便士吗?"上帝回答:"过一秒钟."1,Two birlsTeacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which?Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer.Teacher: Please tell us.Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.两只鸟老师:这儿有两只鸟,一只是麻雀。
谁能指出哪只是燕子,哪只是麻雀吗?学生:我指不出,但我知道答案。
老师:请说说看。
学生:燕子旁边的就是麻雀,麻雀旁边的就是燕子。
2. The Fish Net"Can you tell me what fish net is made, Ann?""A lot of little holes tied together with strings." replied the little girl.鱼网"你能告诉我鱼网是什么做的吗,安?" 老师发问道。