生活大爆炸第三季 03

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生活大爆炸第三季剧本(英文版)S3E8

Big Bang Theory TranscriptsS3E08 – The Adhesive Duck DeficiencyScene: A camp site.Howard: How much time do we have?Leonard: Uh, t-minus five hours, 37 minutes to onset of meteor shower.Raj:Okay, our position is 34.48 degrees north, 118.31 west. That means the azimuth should be 168.22 degrees relative to magnetic north with an elevation of 49.93.Howard: Anything yet?Leonard: Uh, we have a signal, but there’s no frame lock.Howard: Hang on, how about now?Raj: We did it. We have the west coast feed of HBO. Howard: Ooh, Real Sex.Raj:Big deal. Every time I watch that show it’s old women putting condoms on cucumbers.Howard: Alright, let’s see what’s on the east coast feed.Leonard: Oh, hey. Dune.Raj:Not a great movie, but look at that beautiful desert.Leonard: Too bad Sheldon couldn’t come with us. Raj: Yes, it’s not the same without him. (They all laugh)Howard:Oh, this sucks, I’m switching back to Real Sex.Scene: The apartment.Sheldon:Sheldon’s log, stardate 63345.3. While my colleagues are off observing the Leonid meteor shower, I have remained behind to complete my paper on the decays of highly excited massive string states. Although my research is going well I do miss the warmth of human companionship. (He laughs)Credits sequence.Scene: The apartment.Sheldon: And good evening to you, Siam Palace. This is Sheldon Cooper. Yeah, I’m going to be dining alone this evening, so I’ll be reducing my usual order. I’d like to start with one quarter of the assorted appetizers plate and, uh, one half of the golden treasure for two. Oh, for heaven’s sake, in the mid-18th century, King Rama IV of Siam divided a huge empire amongst the colonial powers of Europe in order to preserve his throne. Surely, you, his cultural descendant, can handle pad thai and dumplings.Penny(voice off): Sheldon help!Sheldon: I need to go, but you keep in mind that my sharply worded comments on recently took down a local muffin store. (At Penny’s door, knock, knock, knock) Penny. (Knock, knock, knock) Penny. (Knock, knock, knock) Penny..Penny: Come in! Hurry!Sheldon: Penny?Penny:I’m back here.Sheldon: (At Penny’s bedroom door, knock, knock, knock) Penny. (Knock, knock, knock) Penny. (Knock, knock, knock) Penny..Penny: Oh, for god’s sakes, I’m in the bathroo m! Sheldon: Shall I come back at a better time? Penny: Get in here! Hurry! Don’t you dare knock. Sheldon: Hello.Penny: I slipped in the shower, and I think I dislocated my shoulder.Sheldon: Not surprising. You have no safety mat or adhesive stickers to allow for purchase on a surface with a low coefficient of static friction.Penny: What?Sheldon: Tubs are slippery.Penny: I know. I slipped.Sheldon: I have a series of whimsical duck stickers on the bottom of my tub.Penny: Yeah, okay, whatever. Will you just turn the water off and help me up?Sheldon: They’re holding umbrellas.Penny: What?Sheldon: The ducks in my tub.Penny: Uh-huh.Sheldon: They’re whimsical because ducks have neither the need for, nor the ability to use umbrellas. Penny: Oh, my god. I got to go to the emergency room.Sheldon:Well, assuming you’re correct that your right humerus is no longer seated in the glenoid socket, I would certainly think so.Penny: Okay, can you drive me?Sheldon: I don’t drive.Penny: Well, I can’t drive!Sheldon: Well, it seems we’ve reached an impasse.Penny: Ow.Sheldon:But I could call you a cab or an ambulance.Penny:No, no, no, I can’t wait that long, you got to help me, please.Sheldon: All right. Let it never be said that Sheldon Lee Cooper ignored the pleas of a damsel in distress.Penny:No one’s saying that. Let’s go.Sheldon:Well, it does seem rather ironic that for want of 99-cent adhesive ducks, we both might die in a fiery car crash.Scene: The camp site.Leonard: I wish Penny didn’t have to wo rk, she loves camping.Raj:Yeah, that would have been great. You and Penny having sex in the tent while I sit out here and watch Howard hump a cactus.Howard:Okay, the best I can tell, there are eight other campsites nearby. Mostly science nerds like us, but just over yon ridge are two not unattractive middle school teachers who reek of desperation. Raj: Wow. Wonderful. How old are they? Howard: Oh I don’t know, 50, 55.Raj: Oh, menopause, nature’s birth control. Leonard: Come on, you guys can’t be that h ard up. Howard: I am.Raj: Yeah, me, too.Howard: Look, they gave me homemade cookies. Leonard: Of course, they did. That’s what grandmothers do.Raj: So, what are we waiting for?Howard: Relax, I said we’d stop by a little later after they have their nap.Raj: Good idea. They’ll be refreshed.Howard: Cookie?Raj: Y eah, thank you. Mmmm.Leonard: Mmmm, not bad.Raj:Yeah, very tasty. Well, so tell me more about these teachers.Howard: Not much to tell. They had a VW Microbus and were wearing tie-dyed Grateful Dead shirts. Raj: Huh. Mmm. Good cookies.Scene: Penny’s bedroom.Sheldon:I see no organizational system in here whatsoever. Which panties do you wear on Mondays?Penny: I don’t need panties, I just need shorts and a shirt.Sheldon:My mother always told me one should wear clean underpants in case one is in an accident.Penny: One was already in an accident. Sheldon: That doesn’t mean one won’t be in another, especially if I’m driving.Penny: Clothes, Sheldon. I need clothes! Sheldon: Okay, here.Penny: Seriously? Those shorts with that top? Sheldon: All right.Penny:No… No… Oh, that’s cute.Sheldon:We should have you checked for a concussion.Penny: Okay, now, you got to help me put these on. Sheldon: All right.Penny: But don’t look.Sheldon: Don’t l ook?Penny:I don’t want you to see me naked. Sheldon:Oh. Well, that’s understandable. You may be interested to know that a prohibition against looking is well established in heroic mythology. Uh, Lot and his wife, Perseus and Medusa, Orpheus and Eurydice.Penny: Yeah, great.Sheldon: They always look. It never ends well. Penny: Ok, now you gotta help me get my arm into the sleeve.Sheldon: Ok.Penny: Is that my arm?Sheldon: It doesn’t feel like an arm.Penny: Then, maybe you should let it go. Sheldon: All righty.Scene: The camp site.Leonard:Stars are pretty, aren’t they?Howard:Up above the world so high, like little diamonds in the sky.Raj: That’s beautiful, dude. You should… You should write that down before someone steals it. Howard: So, when do the meteors get here?Raj: The meteors don’t get here, the earth is moving into their path.Leonard: I can feel it. I can feel the earth moving. It’s moving too fast. Raj, slow it down.Raj:Okay, how’s that?Leonard: Better. Thanks.Howard: Stars are pre tty, aren’t they?Leonard:What’s so funny?Raj:It’s your American accent. Everything you say sounds stupid. (With an American accent) Stars are pretty, aren’t they?Scene: Penny’s car.Sheldon: For the record, I should let you know this is my first time driving an actual motor vehicle. Penny: You have your learner’s permit, right? Sheldon:Yes, and I have logged a considerable number of hours on a simulator.Penny: Good.Sheldon:Didn’t work out well.Penny: All right, can we please go?Sheldon: One mome nt. According to my driver’s ed book, a side mirror is properly adjusted when a portion of the is driver’s door handle is visible in the lower right corner. There’s the handle. Oh, no, too far, bringing it back. Optimized. Now, where is the switch to adjust the passenger side mirror? Penny: It’s right there.Sheldon: Where is the passenger side mirror? Penny: In a parking lot in Hollywood. Now, can we please go?Sheldon: Yes. As soon as I adjust my seat. Whee! Oh, dear. I’m going to have to start again.Scene: The camp site.Raj:If I could speak the language of rabbits, they would be amazed, and I would be their king. Leonard: I hate my name. It has nerd in it. Len nerd.Howard: I lost my virginity to my cousin Jeanie. Raj: I would be kind to my rabbit subjects. At first. Leonard:You know what’s a cool name? Angelo. That has angel and jell-o in it.Howard: It was my Uncle Murray’s funeral. We were all back at my Aunt Barbara’s house. Our eyes locked over the pickled herring. We never meant for it to happen.Raj: One day, I hold a great ball for the President of France, but the rabbits, they hate me and don’t come. I am embarrassed, so I eat all the lettuce in the world and make them watch.Leonard: People could call me Angie. Yo, Angie, how’s it goin’?Howard:To this day, I can’t look at pickled herring without being aroused and ashamed. Oh, cousin Jeanie.Scene: Penny’s car.Penny: Could you please drive a little faster? Sheldon:Oh, I think we’re going sufficiently fast. What’s that?Penny: Nothing. The engine does that sometimes. Sheldon:That can’t be nothing, the check engine light is on. We need to find a service station. Penny: No. The light has been on since I bought the car.Sheldon:All the more reason to consult with a mechanic before it explodes.Penny:It’s not going to explode, just keep driving. Warp speed ahead, Mr. Spock.Sheldon: Mr. Spock did not pilot the Enterprise. He was the science officer, and I guarantee you that if he ever saw the Enterprise’s check engine light blinking, he would pull the ship over immediately. Penny: Oh, god, I’m gonna lose the arm. Sheldon: Oh, oh, red light, release accelerator and slowly apply the brake. Nailed it. While we have a moment, may I ask you a question?Penny: What?Sheldon: Why do you have the Chinese character for soup tattooed on your right buttock?Penny: It’s not soup, it’s courage.Sheldon: No, it isn’t. But I suppose it does take courage to demonstrate that kind of commitment to soup.Penny:How did you see it? You said you wouldn’t look.Sheldon:Sorry. As I told you, the hero always peeks.Scene: The camp site.Howard: Anything?Leonard: No. That was the last pudding cup. Howard: No! What about Slim Jims?Leonard: That’s what he used to eat his pudding, remember?Raj: Right! That was so good! Sweety and meaty at the same time.Howard: Wait. Wait, wait. So you’re saying we’re out of food?Leonard: The only thing in here are blue ice packs.Raj:I know they’re poison, but they look like big,yummy otter pops.Leonard: Oh, god, I am so hungry.Howard:Me too. Check and see if we have any more pudding.Leonard: Okay.Scene: The hospital waiting room.Sheldon:All right, there’s no need to bark at me. According to the inexplicably irritable nurse behind the desk, you’ll be seen after the man who claims to be having a heart attack, but appears to be well enough to play Doodle Jump on his iPhone. We have to fill these out. Describe illness or injury. Penny: I dislocated my shoulder.Sheldon: All right. And how did the accident occur? Penny: You ready know that.Sheldon: Cause of accident, lack of adhesive ducks. Okay, medical history. Have you ever been diagnosed with diabetes?Penny: No.Sheldon: Kidney disease?Penny: No.Sheldon: Migraines?Penny: Getting one.Sheldon: Are you currently pregnant?Penny: No.Sheldon: Are you sure? You look a bit puffy. Penny: Change migraine to yes.Sheldon: When was your last menstrual period? Penny: Oh, next question.Sheldon:I’ll put, in progress. Okay, moving to psychiatric disorders, list all major behavioural diagnoses, e.g. depression, anxiety, etcetera. Penny: Oh, my god, what the hell does this have to do with my stupid shoulder?Sheldon: Episodes of sub psychotic rage. Penny: Ass.Sheldon:Possible Tourette’s. All right, moles, lesions or other skin conditions. Soup tattoo on right buttock.Penny:Hey, Sheldon, Sheldon, look, I am scared and in a lot of pain. Could you please just take a break from being you for just a minute and try being, I don’t know, comforting?Sheldon:I’m sorry. There, there. Everything’s going to be fine. Sheldon’s here.Penny: Thanks. That’s much better.Scene: The camp site.Raj: Oh, I’m so hungry!Leonard: Will you shut up? We’re all hungry. Howard:Okay, our objective is the boy scout campsite to the east. Easy target. Big doughy scout master, couple of cubs, most webelos.Leonard: What kind of score are we looking at? Howard:Hot dogs, buns, s’mores, I mean, it’s a freaking 7-11.Leonard: All right, everyone grab flashlights. Howard: Oh, my god, could it be? Yes! My mother put an I love you brisket in my backpack. Leonard: Quick, get forks.Howard:You don’t need forks. It’s so tender, it falls apart in your hands.Raj: He’s right.Leonard: I feel like we’re forgetting something important.Raj: Me, too. But what? (Behind them, the meteor shower has begun)Howard:Maybe a tupperware bowl of roasted potatoes and carrots?Leonard and Raj together: Yes! Yes!Scene: Penny’s apartment.Sheldon: Now remember, you were given powerful pain medication and a muscle relaxer, so, uh, don’t operate heavy machinery. Try not to choke on your own drool.Penny:Wait. You have to help me get into bed. Sheldon has to get me into bed. Bet you never thought I’d say that.Sheldon:Yes. The charm of your drug addled candour knows no bounds.Penny: You kn ow, people think you’re this weird robot man who’s so annoying all the time, and you totally are, but then it’s like that movie Wall-E at the end. You’re so full of love, and you can save a plant and get fat people out of the floaty chairs. Sheldon:That’s a fairly laboured metaphor, but I appreciate the sentiment behind it.Penny:Sing “Soft Kitty” to me.Sheldon:“Soft Kitty” is for when you’re sick. You’re not sick.Penny: Injured and drugged is a kind of sick. Sheldon (singing): Soft kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur…Penny: Wait, wait. Let’s sing it as a round. I’ll start. Soft kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur… See that’s where you come in. I’ll start over. Soft kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur… I’ve got all night, Sheldon. Soft kitty, war m kitty… (Sheldon joins in with the round) little ball of fur, happy kitty, sleepy kitty, purr, purr, purr.Scene: The camp site. Raj is telling a ghost story with the torch on his face.Raj: …And the next morning when he woke up, he rolled over and reali zed… duh-duh-duh! …she was his cousin.Howard:That’s still not funny.Raj(imitating him): That’s still not funny.Howard: And she was my second cousin.Raj (imitating him): And she was my second cousin. Howard: You’re a real douche.Raj: Who cares? You slept with your cousin.。

生活大爆炸第三季剧本(英文版)S3E20

Big Bang Theory TranscriptsS3E20 – The Spaghetti CatalystScene: The lobby.Penny: Oh, damn, they cancelled my Visa. Oh, yay, a new MasterCard!Sheldon: Uh-oh.Penny: What?Sheldon: I was going to get my mail.Penny: Okay. Are, are you hoping to get it telepathically?Sheldon: I think you mean telekinetically. And no, I just wasn’t sure of the proper protocol now that you and Leonard are no longer having coitus.Penny: God, can we please just say no longer seeing each other?Sheldon: Well, we could if it were true. But as you live in the same building, you see each other all the time. The variable which has changed is the coitus.Penny: Okay, here’s the protocol, you and I are still friends, and you stop saying coitus.Sheldon: Good, good. I’m glad we’re still friends.Penny: Really?Sheldon: Oh, yes. It was a lot of work to accommodate you in my life. I’d hate for that effort to have been in vain.Penny: Right.Sheldon: Just to be clear do I have to stop saying coitus with everyone or just you?Penny: Everyone.Sheldon: Harsh terms. But all right, I’ll just substitute intercourse.Penny: Great.Sheldon: Or fornication. Yeah. But that has judgmental overtones, so I’ll hold that in reserve.Penny: So, how you been?Sheldon: Well, my existence is a continuum, so I’ve been what I am at each point in the implied time period. Penny: You’re just coitusing with me, aren’t you?Sheldon: Bazinga.Penny: Mmm. How’s Leonard doing?Sheldon: He seems all right. Although he does spend a disturbing amount of time looking at photographs of you and smelling the pillow you slept on. Oh, but now that I think of it, he asked me not to tell you that. Penny: I’ll pretend I didn’t hear it.Sheldon: I’d rather you pretend I didn’t say it. I see you bought Mama Italia marinara spaghe tti sauce. Penny: Yep.Sheldon: That’s the sauce my mother uses. She likes cooking Italian because according to her, that’s what the Romans made Jesus eat.Penny: Interesting. I’ll have to have you over for spaghetti some night.Sheldon: I’m hungry now.Penny: Oh. Um, okay. Why don’t you give me an hour and come over?Sheldon: Will you cut up hot dogs into little chunks and mix them in with the sauce?Penny: I don’t have hot dogs.Sheldon: Oh, it’s all right, I do. Oh! You’re in for what my mother calls a r eal Eye-talian treat. (Enters apartment).Leonard: Hey, where you been?Sheldon: I was talking with Penny.Howard: What’s wrong with you? You can’t hang out with your roommate’s ex. That’s totally uncool.Leonard: No, no, it’s fine. I don’t care. I’m over it.Raj: Yeah, he’s over it, that’s why he’s been whining all day about trying to invent that memory-wiper gizmo from Men in Black.Sheldon: Is he making any progress? Because I’d like to erase Ben Affleck as Daredevil.Howard: So would Ben Affleck. The po int is, in a situation like this you got to pick sides. You’re either on Team Leonard or Team Penny.Sheldon: Which one picks last?Howard: What?Sheldon: Well, usually I’m on the team that picks last. Unless there’s a kid in a wheelchair.Leonard: Sheldon, I got you your tangerine chicken. I hope you’re hungry.Sheldon: Well, of course I’m hungry. And as I have no plans to eat with any other team, I will consume my tangerine chicken with the appropriate gusto. Mm, mm, mm!Leonard: Okay.Sheldon: Just out of curiosity, do we still have hot dogs?Leonard: I don’t know. Why?Sheldon: Just making dinner conversation. Go, Team Leonard!Credits sequenceScene: A few moments later.Howard: Oh, God, this is good.Raj: Let me ask you a question. Do you believe you’re going to go to hell for eating sweet and sour pork? Howard: Jews don’t have hell. We have acid reflux.Leonard: Do you want the last dumpling, Sheldon?Sheldon: Certainly. It’s not like I have to moderate my food intake because I’m planning on eating ag ain very shortly. Mm, mm, mm!Leonard: So, you guys want to do something tonight?Howard: Nah, I can’t. I got to pick up my mom from her water aerobics class. 18 overweight women flapping their arm fat in a swimming pool. Looks like the manatee tank at Sea World.Leonard: What about you, Raj?Raj: Oh, there it is, now that you don’t have a girlfriend, you want to hang out with me again.Leonard: I never stopped hanging out with you.Raj: Oh, please, we all know I’m the friend you call when you have no other options. If we were the Justice League, I’d be Aquaman.Howard: I wish you were Aquaman. Then I could send you to scoop my mom out of the old lady tank. Sheldon: Excuse me, I’m thirsty, so I’m going to go to the refrigerator and get myself a refreshing be verage. Leonard:You know what? I’ll just spend the evening alone.Raj: What, suddenly I’m not good enough for you?Sheldon: Ah, I do so love beverages. Now I think I’ll take my after-dinner walk.Leonard: Since when do you take after-dinner walks?Howard: Yeah, since when do you take walks?Sheldon: I read a study online that walking after a meal not only aids in digestion, but increases serotonin, and you know me, if there’s one thing I like more than a refreshing beverage, it’s serotonin. Bye-bye. Howard: Hold on. I’ll walk down with you.Sheldon: Oh, that’s not necessary. You can go first.Howard: Or we could go together.Sheldon: I can’t think of a reason why not.Howard: Let’s go.Sheldon: Hold on. Nope, no reason.Raj: I’ve missed you.Scene: The lobby.Sheldon: All right, say hello to your mother for me.Howard: Okay.Sheldon: What?Howard: You said you were going for a walk.Sheldon: I didn’t say outside.Howard:So what, you’re just gonna walk up and down the stairs?Sheldon: No, of course not. That would be odd and suspicious behavior.Woman’s voice: Here Bubbles. Here boy.Howard: Which way are you going?Sheldon: Which way are you going?Howard: I parked my scooter down the block.Sheldon:I’m going the other way. Bye.Howard: Bye. Actually, I’m this way. Do I smell hot dogs?Sheldon: No. I mean, I have no idea what you smell.Howard: I definitely smell raw hot dog.Sheldon:Perhaps you’re getting a brain tumour.Howard: All right, have a nice walk.Sheldon: I shall. Have a nice scoot.Howard: You might want to stand back. I’m sitting on top of 13 horses here.Sheldon: Oh. Hello, doggie. Nice doggie. I bet you think you smell hot dogs. Look, a cat!Scene: Penny’s apartment.Sheldon:(Knock, knock, knock) Penny, (knock, knock, knock) Penny. (Long pause, knock, knock, knock) Penny.(Penny opens door. A dishevelled Sheldon is holding up one hot dog.) Here. I had to trade the others for my life.Scene: The apartment.Raj: Hey, Leonard?Leonard: Yeah?Raj:I haven’t had sex in a year.Leonard: Where you going with this, Raj?Raj:Don’t flatter yourself, dude. I want to go out and meet a woman.Leonard: So, go.Raj: Well, I need a wingman. I don’t want to come off like a lonely loser.Leonard: And you think my presence will help with that?Raj: Well, I d o. Next to you, I’ll look like a catch.Leonard: I’m not going out tonight, Raj.Raj: All right. Would you mind if I went to your room and downloaded some Asian pornography? Leonard: Very much.Raj: Doesn’t have to be Asian.Leonard:Don’t worry. You’ll me et a girl someday.Raj:No, I won’t.Leonard: Yes, you will, and she’ll be beautiful, and kind and sexy and funny and everything you ever wanted in a woman.Raj: You really think so?Leonard: I do, and you’ll fall hopelessly in love and give her your heart. And she’ll take it and grind it into pathetic, little pieces.Raj:But we’ll have sex first, right?Scene: Penny’s apartment.Sheldon: Mmm, mmm, mmm. That’s Eye-talian.Penny: So, um, was Leonard okay with you coming over?Sheldon: Oh, yes. In fact, he said, I’m fine, I don’t care. And he in no way said it in a manner which would lead one to believe that he was covering up feelings of anguish and betrayal.Penny: Well, good.Sheldon:I’m also pleased to report that he’s all cried out over you.Penny: He’s been crying?Sheldon: Oh, I believe that was something else I wasn’t supposed to mention.Penny: Oh, God, I feel terrible.Sheldon: Do you have a stomach ache, too?Penny: No. Why, do you?Sheldon: No.Penny: Why did you ask if I had one, too?Sheldon: Just making polite dinner conversation. Your turn.Penny: All right. So, what’s new in your life?Sheldon: Well, my new shoes are not made for running.Penny: Have you been running?Sheldon:No. It’s just a suspicion I have. Mmm, mmm, mmm.Penny: I’m so gla d you like it.Sheldon: I do. Leonard never cooks for me.Penny:Well, maybe that’s ’cause Leonard can’t cook.Sheldon:You can’t cook and you made me this.Penny:Whatever. Ooh, I’m gonna get the cheesecake out of the fridge.Sheldon:Oh, Lord, I’m in Jew ish hell.Scene: The apartment.Raj:Look at this. Do you think she’s really doing that or is it PhotoShop?Leonard: I’m pretty sure Martha Stewart never got naked with a room full of big, fat Japanese guys.Raj:You don’t know that. Prison changes people.Leonard: Hey, where you been?Sheldon: I told you, walking.Leonard: For an hour and a half?Sheldon: I got lost.Leonard: How could you get lost? Your phone has GPS.Sheldon: Satellites are down. Solar flares.Raj: There are no solar flares right now.Sheldon: Yes, there are.Raj: Dude, I’m an astrophysicist. If there were solar flares, I’d be all up in it.Sheldon:I’m sorry. I misspoke. What I meant to say was my battery died.Leonard: What the hell was that about?Raj:I don’t know. Do you think this is really Hillary Clinton doing it with Oprah?Leonard: Oh, we really need to get you a girl.Scene: Leonard’s bedroom. Leonard is asleep.Sheldon: (Knock, knock, knock) Leonard, (knock, knock, knock) Leonard, (knock, knock, knock) Leonard. Leonard: Oh, just come in!Sheldon: Thanks for seeing me on such short notice.Leonard: What do you want, Sheldon?Sheldon:Maybe this isn’t a good time.Leonard: Tell me why you woke me up or I swear to God I will kill you.Sheldon: Do you really think death threats are an appropriate way to begin this conversation? Sometimes your lack of social skills astonishes me.Leonard: What do you want?Sheldon: You may want to sit down.Leonard:I’m in bed!Sheldon: Point taken. You may want to sit up.Leonard: Sheldon!Sheldon:I’ve been seeing Penny behind your back.Leonard: Okay, when you say seeing Penny, what exactly does that mean?Sheldon: We had dinner last night. She made me spaghetti with little hot dogs cut up in it. Well, little hot dog. I gave up the other five hot dogs to a real dog. A real, big dog. A hell hound. Tangential to the primary story. How about I circle back to it?Leonard: Fine. Why did you have dinner with Penny?Sheldon: I told you, she made spaghetti with little hot dogs. I like spaghetti with little hot dogs.Leonard: Then why did you have Chinese food with us?Sheldon:I didn’t want to upset you. Howard made it very clear that my allegiance should be to male comrades before women who sell their bodies for money.Leonard: Is it possible he said Bros before Hos?Sheldon: Yes, but I rephrased it to avoid offending the hos.Leonard: Sheldon, I don’t care if you want to be friends with Penny.Sheldon: Oh. Well, so the emotional turmoil that’s been keeping me from achieving REM sleep was entirely unjustified?Leonard: Yes.Sheldon: Well then as my meemaw would say, looks like we butchered a pig, but nobody wanted bacon. Leonard: I guess not.Sheldon: And now, as promised, the tangent. Sheldon and the Hell Hound, or How I Lost My Hot Dogs.Scene: The laundry room.Penny: Oh, um, I, I can come back.Leonard: D-don’t be silly. We’re neighbours, we’re going to run into each other, may as well get used to it. Penny: Yeah, I guess you’re right.Leonard: You used to it yet?Penny: Nope.Leonard: Me neither. Oh, Sheldon seemed think that I would be upset about you hanging out with him. But I just want you to know it’s fine.Penny: Oh, oh, good, because, um, his mother called me.Leonard: His mother?Penny: Yeah, she wants me to take him shopping for sheets and towels.Leonard: I was going to do that.Penny: Oh, well, then you, you do it.Leonard:No, I don’t want to do it. You can do it.Penny: Okay, you can take him for shoes.Leonard: I just took him for shoes.Penny: Well, all I know is he says they hurt his feet.Leonard:Fine. I’ll take him for shoes next Saturday.Penny: Oh, no, no, no, a bunch of us from work are going to Disneyland next Saturday and Sheldon wants to come.Leonard: Y ou’re taking him to Disneyland?Penny: Well, he heard me making plans on the phone. Was I going to say no?Leonard:All right. But let me know if you’re going to stuff him with junk food. I don’t want to bring home a nice dinner for him and see it go to waste.Penny: We’re going to Disneyland. He’s going to eat junk food.Leonard: Al l I’m saying is give me a heads-up.Penny: Okay, whatever.Leonard:And don’t let him go on Space Mountain after he eats. He’ll say he can handle it, but I promise you’ll end up with churro puke on your shoes.Penny: All right, got it. Is there anything else?Leonard:Yeah, don’t let Goofy near him. He’ll have nightmares and I’ll have to deal with it.Penny: What’s the problem with Goofy?Leonard: Wish I knew. He’s fine with Pluto.Scene: The apartment.Raj: Hey, do you think the elastic woman in The Incredibles needs to use birth control or can she just be a diaphragm?Howard: Well, that’s it. We’re officially out of things to talk about.Penny:We’re home.Leonard: It’s ten o’clock, where have you been?Sheldon: We stayed for the California Adventure water show. It was pure Disney magic.Leonard: I was going to see that with him.Penny: How was I supposed to know that?Sheldon:It’s all right. I’ll see it again with you.Leonard: And I have food here. You said you were going to call.Penny: I know, I know.Sheldon: I can still eat.Penny: No, you already threw up once. Go put on your PJs and brush your teeth.Sheldon:Okay, but just don’t fightLeonard: We’re not fighting.Penny: Just go.Leonard: Aren’t you going to thank Penny for taking you to Disneylan d?Sheldon: Thank you, Penny.Penny:You’re welcome, sweetie.Leonard: Want a cup of coffee?Penny: Oh, um, I should probably get going.Leonard:Come on. It’s just a cup of coffee.Penny: Yep, okay.Howard (to Raj, who has whispered to him): Oh, yeah, the whole thing seems a little twisted to me, too. Leonard: What am I smelling?Penny: Sheldon’s churro on my shoes.Scene: Sheldon’s bedroom.Penny:He’s such an angel when he’s asleep.Leonard: Yeah. Shame he has to wake up.Penny: I think we can do it.Leonard:Smother Sheldon in his sleep? Wouldn’t that be wrong?Penny: No, be friends. You and me.Leonard: Oh. Sure. Absolutely.Penny:Good. I’m glad.Leonard: Here’s an idea. I’m just throwing it out there, friends who have sex. Penny: Good night, Leonard.Leonard:Kidding. Just a couple of friends goofin’ around.Sheldon(in his sleep): No, Goofy, no.。

生活大爆炸第三季S3E16 中英文对照剧本

[《星球大战V》主题曲]"The Imperial March"您能行行好把衬衫给关了吗Would you please turn your shirt off?那怎么行What?我的闪亮出场需要恢宏的背景音乐I'm giving myself dramatic entrance music.这样人们才会崇拜并畏惧我People will know I'm awesome and to be feared.确实Right.世上最惊悚的事莫过于There's nothing more awesome and frightening than a man 有音乐从一个男人的咪咪间喷薄而出who's got music blasting from between his nipples.斯图亚特忙啥呢Hey,Stuart,what's going on?你可能需要在谷歌日历上记下了Well,you might want to mark your Google calendars.斯坦·李周四来这里开签名会Stan Lee is coming to do a signing on Thursday.他的自传出续集了吗Did he finally write a sequel to his autobiography?我就知道80来岁的人照样老当益壮I'm sure ages79through87were just action-packed.没就是普通的漫画签名罢了No,just a regular comic signing.我叔叔是他的皮肤科医生My uncle is his dermatologist斯坦·李因此卖个面子给他and Stan's doing him a favor.你告诉我这些干嘛啊你Oh,I don't want to know that!这下好了我怎么可能一边和斯坦·李讨论How can I possibly discuss with Stan Lee用银质冲浪板the scientific foundations for interstellar flight来星际飞行的科学依据on a silver surfboard一边逐行扫描他的脸when part of my brain will be scanning his face以寻找皮肤传染病的蛛丝马迹for signs of contagious skin disease?斯坦·李没有皮肤传染病Stan Lee does not have a contagious skin disease.一边去你又不是斯图亚特的叔叔Well,look who thinks he's Stuart's uncle now.难以置信我们要见到斯坦·李了Can't believe it.We're going to meet Stan Lee![《变形金刚》中大黄蜂播放过的歌曲]"I'm So Excited"我错了我不该教他跳这舞的I'm sad to say I taught him those moves.我实在无法取舍I can't decicide究竟让斯坦·李把名字签在whether I want Stan Lee to autograph托尔第一次出场的《神秘之旅》83期上my Journey into Mystery83,first appearance of Thor还是签在《神奇四侠》第五本上or my Fantastic Four number five,死亡博士的处女秀first appearance of Dr.Doom.[Jeopardy智力竞赛节目思考时的音乐节目的主题曲] (Jeopardy theme song playing)阿莱克斯(Jeopardy的主持)我选的答案是Alex,I'm going to go with what is...你是个傻帽you're a dumbass?我决定让斯坦·李把名签在I've decided I'm going to have Mr.Lee sign my copy这个月的《蝙蝠侠》上of this month's Batman.有病吧你That's crazy.蝙蝠侠又不是斯坦·李的作品[竞争对手]Stan Lee had nothing to do with Batman.对啊所以其他人不会让他签这个Yes,which is why no one else will ask him to sign one,于是我就会拥有一件and I will be the possessor of虽然怪异但独一无二的稀世珍宝a unique,albeit confusing,artifact,我从此就和那群芸芸which will set me apart漫画迷不再是一个级别的了from hoi polloi of comic book fandom.这点子不错That's a great idea.我也让他签《蝙蝠侠》去I'm going to get him to sign a Batman as well.你对独一无二这个词很难理解么What is it about the word"unique"you don't understand?靠手被纸片划破了Damn,paper cut.被纸割伤最痛苦了Nothing worse than a paper cut.你忘了割礼吧[犹太儿童切除包皮的仪式]Well,obviously you don't remember your circumcision.上面抽屉里有新孢霉素和创口贴There's Neosporin and Band-Aids in my top desk drawer.这些东西不是该放在卫生间里吗Why don't you keep that stuff in the bathroom?卫生间里有还有厨房里He does.And in the kitchen.还有车里再加上他口袋里And in the car.And in his pocket.没错但我口袋里的可不给别人用Yeah,but the ones in my pocket are mine.-嗨-嘿-Hi!-Hey.猜猜看Guess who's going to be周四谁会去漫画店at the comic bookstore on Thursday?呃给点提示吧Um...can you give me a hint?斯坦·李Stan Lee.噢斯坦利Um...Stanley...斯坦利·图奇?[著名演员]Stanley...Stanley Tucci?不是No.是斯坦·李No,Stan...Lee.哦斯坦·李嘛Oh,oh,Stan Lee!不错嘛Cool!你根本不知道他是谁吧You have no idea who he is,do you?谁说的我当然知道Of course I do.你是我生命中的重要的一部分You're an important part of my life我自然会爱屋及乌啦and I pay attention to the things you are interested in.是嘛好啊Oh,good.好极了Good.那你说说斯坦·李是谁So,who's Stan Lee?星际迷航里的Um...he was on Star Trek.猜错了Nope.-那就星球大战-又错-Star Wars?-No.呃斯坦·李Um...uh,Stan Lee.我知道了Ooh,he was in those是你喜欢的傻帽功夫片里的goofy kung fu movies you love so much?那是李小龙That's Bruce Lee.啊哦Oh.那这是小龙的书呆子哥哥斯坦?So,is this Bruce Lee's nerdy brother,Stan?谢尔顿你抽屉怎么有那么多Sheldon,why do you have all these unopened没拆封的薪水支票paychecks in your desk?因为我想买的东西Because most of the things I'm planning to buy市面上基本上都没有haven't been invented yet.这儿得有好几千块了吧There-there must be thousands of dollars here.你干嘛不存银行里Why don't you put it in the bank?鬼才相信银行I don't trust banks.我坚信如果有一天机器人奋起反抗了I believe that when the robots rise up,自动取款机肯定是起义军领袖ATMs will lead the charge.这儿还有一封You've also got something帕萨迪纳市法院寄来的东西from the Pasadena Municipal Court.肯定又是回信来鄙视我Undoubtedly another snide response之前寄去的几封信里to my repeated letters complaining投诉了法院门口的旗子that the flags in front of the courthouse次序是错误的are flying in the wrong order.按照从左到右的顺序From left to right,it's supposed to be应该先是联邦旗州旗federal,state,最后才轮到帕萨迪纳市旗and then city of Pasadena.打断一下你为此寄了好几封信过去I'm sorry.You sent more than one letter about that?它们看着太碍眼了It bothers me.谢尔顿这是封传票Sheldon,this is a summons.什么的传票A summons for what?信上说你在玛格大道闯了红灯Looks like you ran a red light M Margo Avenue时间是11月16号晚上9点半at9:30p.m.on November16.你被路边的摄像头拍下来了They got you on a traffic camera.挺上镜嘛Nice picture.11月16号November16?佩妮那不就是你在浴缸里摔倒Penny,that's the evening you fell in your bathtub然后我不得不带你去看急诊的那晚吗and I had to drive you to the emergency room.不是No,it isn't.就是Yes,it is.就不是No,it isn't.佩妮我记得很清楚Penny,I have an eidetic memory.而且摄像头也拍下了你在副驾驶位置上Also,that's a picture of you in the passenger seat托着你那脱臼的肩膀holding your dislocated shoulder.才不是呢Mmm,no,it isn't.好吧那为啥传票上违反交规的Okay,then why is a summons for a traffic violation是你的车而且挂着你的车牌committed in your car,bearing your license plates,却寄来我这儿了coming to me?好吧他们给我发了传票Okay,look,they sent me the ticket.我告诉他们当时并不是我开的车I told them I wasn't driving然后他们逼问我"除了你还有谁"and they were all,"If it wasn't you,who was it?"于是你就把我出卖了So you betrayed me?才没有No!这哪是出卖It wasn't a betrayal.我只不过表示"我的驾照已经没分好扣了"It was more of a"I can't afford any more points on my license."我已经不得不I already have to buy my insurance去开曼群岛上买车险了from this place in the Cayman Islands.但我之所以开你的车还不是因为But the only reason I was driving your car你当时可怜兮兮的我才伸出援手was because you were in distress and I was rescuing you.是啊是啊你看现在你有张照片记录英勇的一天Yea yea.Look at you.you have a photo to remember that heroic day.没什么大不了的It's not that big a deal.你只要周四去法院You just go down to the court on Thursday交罚金就行and you pay the fine.我才不去交罚金I'm not going to pay a fine.那就说明我有罪That would imply I'm guilty.你确实有罪You are guilty.[《法律与秩序》的主题曲]这个我喜欢That one I liked.我是无罪的I am not guilty.我只有实习驾照I only have a learner's permit.佩妮教我的Penny was the teacher.转黄灯时她就说"快快快"When the light turned yellow she said"Go,go,go."于是我就"开开开"So I went,went,went.谢尔顿对不起Sheldon,I'm sorry.我会还你罚金的钱I'll be happy to reimburse you for the fine.只要我能参演一部电影You know,as soon as I get a part in a movie或者自己拍个电视剧or my own TV series.不用你还因为我不会交的You don't need to reimburse me because I'm not paying.周四那天我会去法院On Thursday,I will have my day in court正义会得到伸张and justice will be done.我现在就着手准备辩护In fact,I'm going to begin preparing my defense right now.他坐定牢了Okay,he's going to jail.对哦Oh,that's right.周四是斯坦·李签名日Thursday is Stan Lee Day.看到你做的好事了吧Now you see what you've done?就因为你我们都见不到斯坦·李了Because of you,we're all going to miss Stan Lee.你说"都"是什么意思What do you mean"all?"你们是我朋友啊Well,you're my friends.你们要站在我旁边支持我You'll be standing by my side,supporting me,为我提供案例feeding me legal precedents,你们上身要是够壮and if you had the upper body strength,我胜诉时可以把我搁肩膀上扛出去carrying me out on your shoulders when I'm victorious.这个嘛不行Yeah,okay.No.你是说我为自己辩护时Are you saying that you will not stand beside me你不会来站在我身边吗as I plead my case?是这个意思That's what I'm saying.霍华德Howard?斯坦·李法庭上的你Uh,Stan Lee,or you in court.要是《苏菲的选择》有这么简单Uh,if this was Sophie's Choice电影就不会那么长了不行it would've been a much shorter movie.No.拉杰Raj?你会来吧You'll be there,won't you?那好吧All right,then.我所谓的朋友都抛弃了我My so-called friends have forsaken me.看来只剩我和目击证人了So,I guess it'll just be me and my eyewitness.晕死Oh,balls.请着装得体一点Please try to wear something appropriate.要是法官只顾着想It won't help my case你屁股上'美味多汁'的意思if the judge is busy trying to read the word"Juicy"对我的案子没好处scrawled across your buttocks.佩妮Penny.佩妮Penny.佩妮Penny.节奏不对That's just wrong.好了走吧All right,let's go.等一下Wait,hold on.去法院之前Before we get to the courthouse,我想看一下你的演技I'd like to call on your skills as an actress.这是什么What is this?我冒昧地I've taken the liberty为你起草了出庭作证的剧本of scripting your appearance on the witness stand面对现实你有点我行我素because,let's face it,you're somewhat of a loose cannon.别担心都是用你的方言写的{\c it's written in your vernacular.我们排练一下如何So shall we rehearse?我有得选吗Do I have a choice?你当然有选择权Well,of course you have a choice.虽然我们生活在宿命里Although we live in a deterministic universe,但每个人都有自由选择的权力each individual has free will.给我坐下Now,sit down.请你回忆下I call your attention11月16日发生的事to the events of November16.你记得那天吗Do you remember that date?废话我记得"Darn tootin',I do.请法官原谅我家乡内布拉斯加"If the court will excuse my homespun,粗俗简朴的语言corn-fed Nebraskan turn of phrase."很好继续Excellent.Go on.我记得那天"The reason that date is,like,而且铭记在我的脑子里"so totally fixed in my memory是因为我有幸目睹了"is that I had the privilege to be witness毕生从未见过的英勇行为to one of the most heroic acts I've ever seen in,like,ever."谁的英勇行为"And who performed that heroic act?"您的啊阁下"Why,you did,sir.您谢尔顿·库珀博士"You.Dr.Sheldon Cooper.而且我想说我很荣幸认识您And may I add,it is a privilege to know you."不必称赞我"There's no need for compliments.法庭只看重事实This court is only interested in the facts."但感觉很荣幸能认识您啊也是个事实啊"But it is a fact that it's a privilege to know you.真的Totally."一滴泪从我面颊流下A teardrop rolls down my cheek?!纯属建议Only a suggestion.喉咙哽咽一下也可以A catch in your throat would work just as well.但我感觉"But it is a fact很荣幸能认识您啊也是个事实啊"that it's a privilege to know you.真的Totally."你还是穿"美味多汁"的裤子吧Maybe you should put on your"Juicy"pants again.去交罚金Pay the cashier.谢尔顿·库珀Sheldon Cooper.早上好法官大人Good morning,Your Honor.我是谢尔顿·库珀博士Dr.Sheldon Cooper自我辩护appearing in pro se.也就是说代表我自己That is to say,representing himself.我知道什么意思I know what it means.我读过法律学校I went to law school.结果却在审理交通法庭And yet you wound up in traffic court.不管怎样Anyway,法官允许的话if it would please the court,我想做个开庭陈述I'd like to begin with an opening statement.法官会建议你简短点The court would advise you to make it quick,因为法官早上吃了可能馊了的玉米煎饼as the court had a dicey-looking breakfast burrito this morning 而且刚吃了易蒙停(止泻药)and just took an Imodium.快速的开场陈述A quick opening statement.如同一个挤奶凳Like a milking stool,本案有三个my case rests on立足点three legs.我要论证的是I will demonstrate我在驾驶过程中受到一个女人的误导that I was improperly instructed in driving这个女人缺乏社会上by a woman whose lack of respect for society 对反社会界定的基本认识borders on the sociopathic.我要争辩的是I will argue紧急情况下的法律原理that the emergency met the legal doctrine是需要即合法[拉丁文]of quod est necessarium est licitum--也就是需要即合法that which is necessary is legal.但首先But first,我要提出第六条修正案[美国权利法案]I will raise a Sixth Amendment issue.我无法与控方对峙I'm unable to confront my accuser,因为控方是一台非人类机器a non-human entity,to wit,也就是摄像机a camera.所以综上所述So,to sum up:错误指导{\c加上"需要即合法"的原理{\c还有第六条修正案Sixth Amendment.我的挤奶凳辨述完毕My milk stool is complete.佩服佩服Impressive.谢谢Thank you.罪名成立Guilty.去付钱吧Pay the cashier.我反对I object.你这是在无视法律You're completely ignoring the law.不我遵守法律No,I'm following the law.只是在无视你I'm ignoring you.是吗Really?提醒你一下我可是业内顶尖人士I would point out that I am at the top of my profession,你却坐在桌子后面过家家while you preside over the kiddy table of yours.库珀博士我给你个机会为你最后的言论道歉Dr.Cooper,before I find you in contempt不然我要视你为蔑视法庭and throw you in jail,I'm going to give you a chance把你扔进监狱to apologize for that last remark.我可是个科学家I am a scientist.我才不会为陈述事实而道歉I never apologize for the truth.那是我的位置That's my spot.我等不及要问斯坦·李I can't wait to ask Stan Lee为什么他笔下每个角色的姓和名why he insists on giving all his characters first and last names 开头字母都是一样的that start with the same letter.[以下均为惊奇漫画人物]得了你这是何必Oh,come on.Why would you do that?分别出自《绿巨人》和《神奇四侠》布鲁斯·班纳里德·理查Bruce Banner,Reed Richards,分别出自《神奇四侠》和《怪谈故事》后者为惊奇的系列漫画苏珊·斯汤斯蒂芬·史催博士Sue Storm,Stephen Strange,分别出自《蜘蛛侠》和《神奇四侠》奥拓·八爪博士和银影侠Otto Octavius,Silver Surfer,出自《蜘蛛侠》彼得·帕克还有最夸张的Peter Parker,oh,and worst of all,出自《神奇的蜘蛛侠》小约翰·约拿·詹姆森J.Jonah Jameson,Jr.好吧我要插在你前面Okay,I'm cutting.免得斯坦·李被你惹毛了我遭殃I'm not gonna talk to Stan Lee after you cheese him off.《蜘蛛侠》的主题音乐铃声嗨Hey.谢尔顿进了监狱Sheldon's in jail.啥谢尔顿进了监狱?!Sheldon's in jail?!被你说中了You called it.-怎么搞的-你觉得呢-For what?-What do you think?就是他平时一贯的找抽风格For doing the same crap he always does,只不过法官不吃这一套except to a judge.他不道歉就出不来He has to stay in there until he apologizes.那就让他道歉啊So tell him to apologize.多谢提醒莱纳德Oh,gee,thanks,Leonard.你以为我没想过吗That didn't occur to me.如果他五点前还不道歉If he doesn't apologize by5:00,就得在监狱里过夜了he is going to spend the night in jail.哦不真是糟糕Oh,no,that's terrible.哇队伍动了挂了回见Ooh,the line's moving.Got to go.Bye.有人吗Excuse me?狱卒在吗Excuse me,jailor?咋了What?我要上厕所I need to use the restroom.在那边自便Knock yourself out.这算是马桶?That's the toilet?不然你以为是许愿池吗Well,it ain't a wishing well.请转告法官我准备向他道歉Please tell the judge I'm ready to apologize.看啊Look at that."致吾友莱纳德"To my friend,Leonard.惊奇漫画的一个系列后改称Loners独行侠斯坦·李"From Stan Lee,Excelsior!"牛逼Awesome.我上面写的是"致吾友霍华德"Mine says,"To my friend,Howard.独行侠斯坦·李From Stan Lee,Excelsior!"我上面写的是"致拉杰斯坦·李"Mine says,"To Raj,from Stan Lee."因为你纠结他的角色名把他惹毛了That's'cause you pissed him off about his character names.搞毛Hey,前者是惊奇漫画虚拟组织S.H.I.E.L.D成员后者出自《蜘蛛侠》我还没提达姆弹头杜甘和绿魔I didn't even mention Dum Dum Dugan or Green Goblin,分别出自《夜魔侠》和《钢铁侠》马特·默多克和小辣椒波兹Matt Murdock,Pepper Potts,末日博士[出自《神奇四侠》]Victor V on Doom,还有最夸张的oh,and worst of all,惊奇漫画的长篇幽默系列米莉模特Millie the Model.我们回来了We're home.伙计情况如何Oh,hey,buddy.How'd it go?你明明都知道了还问个屁You know very well how it went.是啊但我们想听你亲口说Yeah,but we all want to hear it from you.我被判有罪还被罚了533美元I was found guilty and fined$533.我会写张支票给你I'm going to write you a check for that.只要你答应我藏在抽屉里As long as you promise to put it in your drawer别去兑换就和其他那些东西一样and never cash it,like the others.我还没有驾照I also now have three points但上面已经被扣了三点on a driver's license I do not yet possess,还被迫道了个冤枉歉and I was forced to issue an undeserved apology,只因为我拒绝在一群犯人面前simply because I refuse to urinate就着个不锈钢尿盆排尿in a stainless steel bowl in front of criminals.再加上你错过了和斯坦·李见面Plus,you didn't get to meet Stan Lee.好了别刺激他了霍华德Okay,that's enough,Howard.这可怜虫够难受的了The poor guy's had a tough time.一个下午都待在监狱He had to spend the entire afternoon in jail还穿成这幅德行wearing that suit.说得对You're right,所以我们也别提在亲笔签名后so it would be cruel to mention他带斯图尔特和咱一起去吃了意式冰淇淋that after he finished signing autographs,这就太残酷了Stanley took Stuart and us out for gelato.你们和斯坦·李共进意式冰淇淋?You had gelato with Stan Lee?他还允许我们叫他斯坦He said we could call him Stan.除了拉杰Except for Raj.你这下满意了吧佩妮Well,I hope you're satisfied,Penny.今天我所遭受的磨难You are responsible这全都是你的错for all the evil that has be fallen me today.-好吧我知道...-我还没说完呢-Okay,I realize that...-Not finished.都是因为你It is because of you害得我有了犯罪记录that I now have a criminal record,还因为你害得我and it is because of you that I missed out错过了和斯坦·李共进意式冰淇淋on having gelato with Stan Lee.-好吧也许以后还有机会...-不可能了-Okay,maybe you'll have another chance to have...-No,no.再也没有这种机会和斯坦·李一起共进意式冰淇淋了I will never have another chance to have gelato with Stan Lee 因为这种机会because opportunities to have和斯坦·李一起共进意式冰淇淋一生只有一次gelato with Stan Lee come but once in a lifetime.手起笔落The Moving Finger writes,白纸黑字再难改[出自《鲁拜集》]and having writ,moves on他刚是朝我竖中指了吗Did he just somehow give me the finger?可不只是手指Not just the finger.还挥起了小手The moving finger.你好斯图尔特Hey,Stuart.你好佩妮Oh,hey,Penny.-怎么了-没什么-What's going on?-Nothing.我正准备打烊然后出发I'm just getting ready to close up and...head out.真好晚上有安排Cool.Got any fun plans?对今晚有重大安排Oh,yeah.Big night tonight.跟只猫一起共享金枪鱼罐头Gonna share a can of tuna with the cat.真好Oh,nice.那甚至不是我的猫Not even my cat.我就喂喂它I just feed it.有几晚它甚至都不会出现Some nights it doesn't even show up.好吧Oh,okay.我希望Well,I was hoping,um,你能帮我个忙you could do me a favor.义不容辞说吧Sure,yeah,name it.这次谢尔顿没见上斯坦·李我得负一定责任Well,I'm kind of responsible for Sheldon missing Stan Lee,我真的很想弥补他and I really want to make it up to him.所以希望你能给我他的电话So I was hoping you could give me his phone number也许我能安排他们见个面so maybe I can arrange for them to meet.抱歉我没他电话Oh,I'm sorry,I don't have his phone number.该死Damn.好吧谢了All right.Thank you.等等Wait.我有他地址I have his address.真的Really?太好了Great!但不能告诉你But I can't give it to you.那你为什么要提这茬Then why did you tell me you had it?我不知道这不聊天嘛I don't know.Just chatting.别这样看着我You're looking at a guy我已经可怜到连流浪猫who could very well get stood up都可能放我鸽子by a stray cat tonight.抱歉斯图尔特I'm sorry,Stuart.不管怎样谢了Thanks anyway.等等Wait.怎么了Yeah?不如我们做笔交易Maybe we can make a deal.什么交易What kind of deal?我告诉你地址I will give you the address你就陪我去参加我表妹的婚礼if you go to my cousin's wedding with me.你这是在逼我跟你约会You're extorting a date out of me?我没其他办法I kind of have to.这次要结婚的这个表妹The cousin who's getting married就是以前经常陪我参加别人婚礼的那个is the cousin I usually go to weddings with.我能带上莱纳德吗Can I bring Leonard?当然随便吧Sure.What the hell.成交Deal.告诉别人他是你表哥就行We'll tell people he's your cousin.这是斯坦·李家的大门This is Stan Lee's front door.越过斯坦·李家马路的石头We were on Stan Lee's curb,走过斯坦·李经常走过的路then we were on Stan Lee's walk,终于来到了斯坦·李家大门外and now we're at Stan Lee's front door.对Yup.天哪你按了斯坦·李家门铃Oh,Lord,you just rang Stan Lee's doorbell.就站在斯坦·李家门外At Stan Lee's house.我们就要进去跟斯坦·李共享牛奶和点心We're about to go in and have milk and cookies with Stan Lee.亲爱的我不确定他是否会招待我们点心Okay,sweetie,I don't know if we're gonna have cookies,还是直接问候了事or he's just gonna say hi,还是会怎么着所以让我来跟他谈...or really what's gonna happen,so just let me talk,and...哪位Yeah?你就是斯坦·李吗Are you Stan Lee?见鬼Oh,damn.你好我叫佩妮这位是我朋友谢尔顿Hi.I'm Penny.This is my friend,Sheldon.她现在不是我朋友We're not friends at the moment.鉴于此刻形势Depends on how this goes.好吧总之Right,right.Anyway,谢尔顿是您的超级粉丝他原打算Sheldon here is a huge fan of yours,and he was supposed那天去漫画书店参加您的见面会to meet you the other day at the comic book store,可惜最后进了监狱but he kind of ended up in jail.了解你们真以为I see.And you thought这样不请自来就能随便敲我家门you'd just come over to my house uninvited?你说过我们是受邀来的You said we were invited.不不我只说我邀请你Oh,no,no,I said I'm inviting you跟我一起去斯坦·李家to come with me to Stan Lee's house.你们这些自称粉丝的真是不可思议You know,you fan boys are unbelievable.真以为只要自己高兴随时都能按我家门铃Do you think you can just ring my doorbell any time you want?既然这样干嘛不索性进门来I mean,why don't you just come on in跟我一起看湖人队比赛好了and watch the Lakers game with me?我不是很爱好体育Well,I'm not much of a sports fan,不过感谢邀请but thank you.我很抱歉I'm sorry.他不是很懂什么叫讽刺He doesn't really understand sarcasm.好吧我动点真格的他就会懂了Well,I'll give him something he'll understand.琼妮快报警Joanie,call the police!很高兴见到你Nice to meet you.《神奇四侠》《夜魔侠》Fantastic Four,Daredevil,《无敌钢铁超人》Invincible Iron Man,分别为《钢铁侠》《蜘蛛侠》中角色快乐霍根蜥蜴博士Happy Hogan,Curt Connors...你能不能消停会Would you just let it go?Fin Fang Foom是《钢铁侠》中一条龙的形象还有最糟糕的非凡龙And worst of all,Fin Fang Foom.你去哪了Hey,where've you been?我告诉你们我去哪了I'll tell you where I've been.你们或许跟斯坦·李一起吃了冰激凌You boys may have had gelato with Stan Lee还得了他亲笔签名的漫画and gotten autographed comics,我可是亲自进了他家but I saw the inside of his house还得到了他亲笔签名的禁制令申请状and got an autographed application for a restraining order.赞Sweet.还有我还能再见到他等听证会的时候Plus,I get to hang out with him again at the hearing.下次我还能如法炮制This is going to look great hanging nextLeonard Nimoy史波克扮演者去要伦纳德·尼莫伊签名的禁制令to my restraining order from Leonard Nimoy.。

生活大爆炸The Big Bang Theory 第三季中英剧本第4集

一切都好Okay-dokay.每次看这部电影我都很困惑This movie baffles me every time we watch it. 什么意思What do you mean?指南说得一清二楚The instructions are very clear:午夜后别喂魔怪"don't feed the gremlins after midnight."别弄湿魔怪"don't get the gremlins wet."这能有多难How hard is that?伙计们好啊Hi,guys.好啊亲爱的Hi,honey.好Hey.都已经是"亲爱的"啦Ooh,we're "honey" now,are we?对自从他们发展至肉体关系Yes. Since their relationship become carnal,佩妮就升级了对他的爱称Penny has upgraded his designated term of endearment,跟她称为"甜心"的人区分Thus distinguishing him from those she calls "sweetie,"通常为了略微消减隐含的讽刺之意Usually in an attempt to soften a thinly-veiled insult.别这么无聊"甜心"You're boring people,"sweetie".但有时她就是赤裸裸的讽刺Although,sometimes,she omits the veil entirely.你们在干什么So,what are you guys doing?庆祝哥伦布发现美洲纪念日Celebrating Columbus day.我们在看《七宝奇谋》《小魔怪》《少年福尔摩斯》We're watching goonies,gremlins and young sherlock holmes. 都是克里斯·哥伦布的作品They're all written by Chris Columbus.好啊Okay.那你们感恩节看什么What do you watch on thanksgiving?游行The parade.这倒是提醒了我Oh,you know,that reminds me--我通常回内布拉斯加过感恩节I usually go back to Nebraska for thanksgiving, 但今年取消了But this year they're calling it off,因为我哥哥被人告了On account of my brother's trial.为什么What's he on trial for?只是个误会Oh,just a big misunderstanding.你应该会喜欢我哥哥You know,you'd actually like my brother.他也算是个化学家He's kind of a chemist.既然我今年在这里过感恩节Anyway,I was thinking I'd have thanksgiving here,你们都要来And you are all invited.我会去的Oh. I'll be there.你是用蔓越橘果冻Will you be serving cranberry jelly还是蔓越橘酱招待客人Or cranberry sauce?估计两个都有I guess I could serve both.估计貌似你对这方面不在行You guess? You don't seem to have much of a handle on this. 佩妮我很想参加但每年Yeah,I really wish I could,Penny,but every year,我妈都请所有亲戚过来My mother has all the relatives over and cooks up做传说中的鸡胸鱼Her famous tur-briska-fil.鸡脯鱼?Tur-briska-fil?火鸡包胸脯肉杂胸脯肉里包鱼丸Turkey stuffed with a brisket stuffed with gefilte fish.没听起来那么好吃It's not as good as it sounds.拉杰你呢Raj,what about you?他通常都去我家过节对吧Oh,he usually comes to my house. Right,pal?好啦今年不逼你All right,this year,you don't have to吃鸡脯鱼啦Eat the tur-briska-fil.我根本不嚼I don't even chew it.直接当药丸吞I swallow it like pills.拉杰怎么了So,what's going on with Raj?好消息是Well,the good news is,我对我妈的鸡脯鱼没意见He has no problem with my mother's tur-brka-fil. 真不敢相信继续说Hard to believe,but go on.坏消息是他要被驱逐出境了The bad news is,he says he'getting deported.他要被驱逐出境What do you mean,是什么意思He's getting deported?意思是美国政府I believe it means that the U.S. Government要驱赶他离开本国Is going to expel him from the country.他要么回印度老家He could then either return to his native india,要么移居接受他的国家Emigrate to another country that's willing to accept him, 或者去公海当个无国籍海盗Or wander the high seas as a stateless pirate.要是我我就选海盗Personally,I'd choose pirate.佩妮你能不能先出去Penny,would you mind stepping outside我们才能和他谈谈So we can speak to him?Fine.但他也该改改不敢跟女生说话的毛病了But the man really needs to work on his girl issues.这也是考虑做海盗的理由Another reason to consider life of piracy.即使是今天海盗仍是男性职业Even today,I unrstand that's an all-male profession.好了她走了Okay,she's go.对不起我失态了Sorry. I lost my cool.怎么回事So,what's going on?事情是这样的Okay,here's the deal:六个月前我的实验Six months ago,my research testing测试海王星物体的成分The predicted composition of trans-neptunian objects 宣告失败Ran into a dead end.So?我的签证只有在大学任聘才有用So,my visa's only good as long as i employ to the university. 如果他们发现我的实验一无所获And when they find out that I've got squat,他们就会裁掉我They're going to cut me off.而且我说的一无所获是一丁点都没有By the way,when I say squat,I mean diddly-squat.我倒是希望有那么一丁点收获I wish I had squat.等等那你过去6个月都在做什么So,wait,what have you been doing for the past six months? 收收邮件啦You know,checking e-mail,更新FACEBOOK页面啦Updating my facebook status,搞搞维基词条啦Messing up wikipedia entries.你们知道吗Hey,do you know netflixNETFLIX现在允许客户端下载电影了Lets you stream movies on your computer now?这么说你一直都拿大学的薪水And you've continued to take the university's money 蒙混过日子Under false pretenses?你这个天体物理学家也太没职业道德了Highly unethical for an astrophysicist.不过倒是很适合海盗Although practically mandatory for a pirate.我不想回印度I don't want to go back to india.印度又热又吵人又多It's hot and loud,and there's so many people.你们不知道到处都是人You have no idea-- they're everywhere.伙计们动动脑子Okay,guys,think.怎么才能让拉杰留下来How do we keep Raj in the country?另找一份工作不就行了Why doesn't he just get another job?你问我有什么用What are you asking me for?我哪知道你能不能说话I don't know if you can talk now or not. 牛肉Oh,beef...我会很想念你的I'm going to miss you so much.知道吗孟买的麦当劳Do you know,at the mumbai Mcdonald's, 没有巨无霸You can't get a big mac?只有鸡肉大君麦香堡All you can get is a chicken maharaja mac. 而特制酱料And the special sauce--咖喱相信我在印度Curry-- which,in india,believe you me,咖喱一点也不特别Is really not that special.别担心能找到工作的Don't worry,you'll find another job.我先练习一下Yeah,let me start practicing for it."要薯条和大君麦香堡吗""do you want fries with maharaja mac?"好啊莱纳德Hi,Leonard.好啊拉杰Hello,Raj.你好谢尔顿Hello，Sheldon.不好意思虽然我还不善长解读面部表情Forgive me,as you know,I'm no adept at reading facial cues, 但我想试一试But I'm going to take a stab here:你不是在伤心就是在反胃中You're either sad or nauseated.-我是伤心-我正准备说伤心的- I'm sad. - I was going to say sad.不知道怎么的我犹豫了I don't know why I hedged.你在吃什么What are you eating?曲管通心粉配牛肉酱和番茄酱Elbow macaroni with ground hamburger and tomato sauce. 噢牛肉通心粉Oh,beefaroni.我最怀念的就会是你了I think I'll miss you most of all.我一直对这事儿有些疑惑I've always been a little confused about this.为什么印度教不准吃牛肉Why don't hindus eat beef?我们相信牛就是神We believe cows are gods.学术上说并不准确Not technically.在印度教中牛被认为长的像神In hinduism,cattle are thought to be like god.不需要你教我自家的文化谢尔顿Do not tell me about my own culture,Sheldon!就我现在的心情老子会揪你出去的In the mood I'm in,I'll take you out--我向牛发誓I swear to cow!对不起I'm sorry.我也是Me,too.我只是我有点激动了I'm just... I'm a little on edge.可以理解Understandle.你的整个人生仿佛崩溃了Your entire life seems to be crumbling around you, 你的未来充其量也只能说惨淡无光And your future appears bleak at best.谢谢Thank you.而且你在印度教和牛的问题上是错的And you're wrong about hinduism and cows.拉杰你猜怎么着Hey,Raj,guess what.拉夫林教授正招募人员加入Professor Laughlin is looking for someone to join 恒星进化科研小组The stellar evolution research team.真的吗那太棒了You-you're kidding! That's fantastic!那你还在等什么打电话预约面试啊What are you waiting for? Call him and set up an interview. 现在就打I'm on it.这叫高兴对吗That's happy,right?-没错-搞定- Yeah. - Nailed it.库萨帕里博士请进Dr. Koothrappali,come on in.我很惊讶你居然想加入I was surprised to hear you were interested我们这个小团队In joining our little team.放弃那些海王星外星体了是吗Giving up on those trans-neptunian objects,are we?不不那是个很有前景的领域No,no,it's a very promising area.如果条件理想我愿意花数年在这课题上In a perfect world,I'd spend several more years on it.但我却不能放弃这个机会But I just couldn't pass up the opportunity与您共同研究这个令人无比兴奋To work with you on your tremendously exciting 且还未最终定论的假设上And not yet conclusively disproved hypothesis. 说的太精彩了Splendid.请坐Uh,please sit down.要来一杯雪利酒吗Can I offer you a Sherry?现在还为时过早不是吗It's a little early,isn't it?我们不在比邻星上[很暗的恒星意指还早]Not on Proxima Centauri.说的太好了That's very good.非常有趣但如果你不介意的话Jolly amusing,but if you don't mind,把我那杯留到泰坦星日落之时[土卫六日落晚]I'll hold off until suet on Titan.说的好Well done.我预感你将会I have a feeling you're going很好的融入这个团队的库萨帕里博士To fit in just fine,Dr. Koothrappali.谢谢称赞先生Thank you,sir.不好意思I'm sorry.我来晚了吗Am I late?不不时间正好No,no,no. Right on time.库萨帕里博士请允许我向你介绍Dr. Koothrappali,may I present来自麻省理工的麦思彤博士Dr. Millstone from MIT.她将领导我们的数据分析小组She'll be heading up our data analysis team. 很高兴认识你库萨帕里博士It's nice to meet you,Dr. Koothrappali.我读了您关于柯伊伯带物体大小分布的文章I read your paper on Kuiper Belt object size distribution. 我非常喜欢I really enjoy it.您是如何修正选择偏差的呢How did you correct for the selection bias?我进行了模拟测试Well,I ran a simulation that allowed me令我可以修正观测效率To correct for the observational efficiency.这实在是太牛了That's just fascinating.谢谢Thank you.你想在我的热水浴池里了解更多细节吗Would you like to hear more about it in my hot tub?那我们什么时候开始呢So,when do I start?你没得到工作是什么意思What do you mean you didn't get the job?你怎么可能得不到How could you not get it?你知道的他是英国人我是印度人{\c I'm indian.自甘地之后他们就对我们不大友好了Ever since Gandhi,they haven't liked us very much.等等你是说他对你有种族歧视Wait,are you saying that he discriminated against you? 因为我们应该提出控告Because we should file a complaint.可以是可以That's okay.已经有人来控告了A complaint's been filed.好了玩完了So,that's it.那是我最后的希望That was my last hope.我要被驱除出境了I'm going to be deported,狼狈地回到家里Sent home in disgrace,被我表亲桑杰冷嘲热讽Exposed to the sardonic barb of my cousin Sanjay.或许你们知道他的马甲Or,as you may know him,是AT&T的客服人员戴夫Dave from at&t customer service.我会很想你的I'm really going to miss you.你会来印度探望我吗Will you come visit me india?天那个貌似要17小时的飞机吧Gee,that's,like,a 17-hour flight.要不我们在中点相见How about I meet you halfway?中点是在离日本海岸线600英里的地方Halfway is 600 miles off the coast of japan. 干脆这样我们视频吧Tell you what,we'll Skype.先生们Gentlemen.-嗨-拉杰- Hey. - Raj,你得到了拉夫林教授的工作吗Did you get a job with Professor Laughlin?-没有-我猜也是- No. - I assumed as much.但别害怕But never fear.就像是无数的动作片里面Like the subordinate male protagonist那些次要男主角In countless action movies在影片放到一半时消失那样Who disappears half way through the second reel, 我现在回来拯救世界I have returned to save the day.奇怪了Odd.他通常都是在欢呼声中回归的Usually,he's met by cheers.不论如何我正想着探索Anyway,I was thinking about exploring超弦理论在The string theory implications暗物质湮灭时所放出的伽玛射线中的含义Of gamma rays from dark matter annihilations,我突然间发现我能利用And it occurred to me that I could benefit--打扰一下谢尔顿Excuse me,Sheldon.通常需要浪费多少卷胶片才能让次要的男主角How many reels before the subordine male protagonist 说到重点上Gets to s point?不好意思如果你没有为我的出场欢呼I'm sorry-- if you didn't cheer at my entrance,那你现在提出你的假设也为时已晚了It's too late to buy into the premise.不管怎么说我从系主任那里Anyway,I got some extra money获得了多余的资金From the head of the department,而拉杰可以来给我打工And Raj can come work for me.你想让我与你共事You want me to work with you?是给我打工For me.你今后在工作的时候You're going to have to listen必须要更仔细的听清我的话More careful when you're on the job.好吧但是可别搞错了Ay,uh,please don't take this the wrong way,我情愿在乳头上别张纸But I'd rather swim buck-naked across the Ganges 赤条条地游过恒河With a paper cut on my nipple抑或是染上病毒痛苦而挣扎着死掉And die a slow,agonizing death也不要和你一起工作From a viral infection than work with you.是为我工作For me.谢尔顿你在忙吗Sheldon,are you busy?这不废话么Of course I'm busy.那要我等你吗Shall I wait?当然了Yes,please能为你效劳吗How may I help you?我重新考虑了你提出的合作建议I've reconsidered your offer to let me work with you. 是为我工作For me是是为你工作Yes,for you.我接受但有几个条件I do,however,have a few conditions.首先任何情况下First,at all times,你都得把我看作同事平等对待I am to be treated as a colleague and an equal.其次在所有发表物上Second,my contributions shall noted都应注明我的名字和贡献In all published material.第三绝不许你在我面前And third,you are never allowed to lecture me挑剔我的印度教或印度文化On hinduism or my Indian culture.真令我感到钦佩拉杰I'm impressed,Raj.你提得条件中肯而合理Those are very cogent and reasonable conditions.谢谢Thank you.我统统拒绝I reject them all.那我就毫无选择了Then you leave me no choice.只能接受这份工作I accept the job.真抱歉我想你大概搞错了I'm sorry,I believe you've misunderstood.我才不是请你来工作I'm not giving you the job.我只是给你一个机会来应征I'm simply affording you the opportunity to apply for it. 坐下吧我们先来面试{\c we'll get started with the interview.靠你开玩笑吗Wha... You're kidding!请坐Please.好吧all right.好吧...So...你就穿这个来面试吗That's what you wear to an interview?行行好吧哥们我们可是多年的老友啊Come on,dude,we've been friends for years. 哇开始套近乎了吗Oh,pulling strings,are we?谢尔顿看在老天爷的份上别逼我求你Sheldon,for god's sakes,don't make me beg. 逗你玩!Bazinga!你是我经典实用笑话You've fallen victim的第N个受害者To another one of my classic practical jokes.我现在可是老板你敢说我的笑话不好笑?I'm your boss now. You may want to laugh at that. 二人世界的感觉真棒不是吗Ah,this is nice having the place to ourselves,isn't it? 唔唔Uh-huh.拉杰正和谢尔顿一起工作Now that raj is working for sheldon,我就不用开车载他了I don't have to chauffeur him around anymore.更重要的是他们工作到这么晚plus,yeah,with them working late so much,我们就能过二人世界了We get some privacy.嗯哼Mm-hmm.想来点儿刺激的吗Hey,want to get a little crazy?你想怎样What are you thinking?我们在谢尔顿的专座上狠狠干一场Let's slide over to sheldon's spot and make out.你可真是放荡You are a dirty girl.天啊他怎么知道Oh,god,how did he know?你们好啊Hello.嗨霍华德Hi,howard.我打扰你们了吗Am I interrupting?是有一点Little bit,yeah.我应该先打个电话来Guess I should have called.说得也是Yeah,maybe.今晚我通常都和拉杰一起Tonight's the night I usually go line dancing 去帕拉米诺跳排排舞With raj at the palomino.然后呢Uh-huh.但他现在却要和谢尔顿一起工作But he's working with sheldon.我们知道Yes,we know.要我走吗Want me to leave?也无所谓啦You know,whatever.那好我就在这消磨一会儿好了Okay,I guess I can hang for a little while.在看什么呢So what are we watching?哇欲望都市Sex and the city. Yikes.别换台我喜欢这部电影Hey,I happen to love this mie.好那就看吧Fine,let's watch it.好像我们的经期同步了哈Maybe all our periods will synchronize.好我们现在要设计一个实验All right,we're going to be designing an experiment以观察由于宇宙暗物质的碰撞To look for the annihilation spectrum而产生的光谱湮灭现象Resulting from dark matter collisions in space. 哇暗物质耶Ooh,dark matter.那我们最好带个手电筒We better bring a flashlight.开玩笑而已I was making a joke.我才是老板I'm the boss.只有我能开玩笑I make the jokes.抱歉你来吧Sorry go ahead and make your joke.现在有时间开玩笑吗This is not the time for joking.我们可是正儿八经地在做研究We're doing serious research,需要完全高度集中精神Which requires complete and utter focus.好那就全力开工吧All right,let's buckle down and work.("虎视眈眈" 电影洛奇主题曲幸存者乐队演奏) ("eye of the tiger" by survivor playing)-谢尔顿-咋了-Sheldon. -What?有脑残片么I need an aspirin.在头个抽屉里Top desk drawer.-谢了-好了吗-Thank you. -Alright?-是-很好-Yes. -Good.真是有趣That was fun.谢谢Thank you.莱纳德亲亲我们每一次嘿咻完Leonard,honey,you don't have to say thank you 你不用都说谢谢Every time we have sex.噢好Oh. Okay.明天你如果在信箱里看到张卡片Tomorrow you're going to get a card in the mail. 扔了它就是Just throw it away.两位早上好啊(爱尔兰腔)Top o' the mornin'o ya!你在这干嘛What are you doing here?平时星期天我都是和拉杰一起Well,usually,on Sundays,I go with raj去农贸市场骗骗嬉皮小妞To scam on hippie chicks at the farmers market, 但他还在谢尔顿那里工作But he's still working with sheldon,所以我想还是到这来So I thought I'd come over here给你们做一些炒鸡蛋和意大利香肠And make you guys scrambled eggs and salami. 最适合刚缠绵过的情侣It's the perfect meal for apres l'amour.噢杀了我吧Oh,kill me.顺便无意中听到你最后那猛地一下By the way,I couldn't help overhearing your big finish. 真有你的啊莱纳德Bravo,leonard.瞧如果我说杀了我的时候你杀了我See,if you had killed me when I said "kill me,"我就不会听到了I wouldn't have had to hear that.你们有何打算What do you guys think?想去看个日场演出吗Wanna take in a matinee,还是去溜旱冰Maybe go rollerblading,去上节健身踏板课程Catch a step class?-你倒是做点什么呢-好吧- Do something. - Okay.霍华德我们得谈谈Um,Howard,we need talk.好啊怎么了福尔摩斯Sure. wats up,Holmes?你得明白Uh... Please understand不是我们不想你呆在这儿That it's not that we don't want you around,但我和佩妮偶尔也需要...But Penny and I occasionally need some...独处一会儿Alone time.我明白了我当电灯泡了I-I get it,I'm the third wheel.抱歉我早该明白的Sorry,I should have seen that.我这就走I'll get out of your way.还有那些鸡蛋... 快趁热吃吧You're gonna want to eat those eggs while they're still hot. 谢谢Thank you.冰箱里还有熏鲑鱼和奶油芝士There's lox and cream cheese in the fridge.百吉饼在烤箱里我正在加热The bagels are in the oven.I was warming them up.太好了That's great.我就去跟我妈呆着好了反正一直都很好玩的I'm just going to hang out with my mother.That's always fun. 很好Good.我们是不是太坏了Are we terrible people?我不知道I don't know.那你想让我怎么办What do you want me to do?去追他吧带他回来{\c bring him back.你确定Are you sure?-对-好吧- Yeah. - Okay.霍华德回来吧Howard come back.你们还真让我担心了那么一会儿Oh,you guys had me scared for a minute.不对不对No,no,no,no!据我们对本次对撞的预测这个比率远远过低了That rate is much too low from what we'd expect from this collision. 你到底明不明白Do you understand我们在讨论的是暗物质在外层空间的对撞We're talking about Dark Matter colliding in outer space?我当然明白Of course I understand.你算哪根葱来跟我讨论外层空间And who are you to tell me about outer space?我是天体物理学家I'm the astrophysicist.天体就意味着外太空"astro" means "space"天体是指星星"astro" means "star"好吧这么跟你说吧Okay,well,let me just tell you,如果这会儿是用我的母语在跟你争论If we having this argument in my native language 我早就把你杀得片甲不留I'd be kicking your butt.英语本来就是你的母语English is your native language.好吧这个让你说对了但这边你确实错了Okay,you got me there,but you're wrong about this! 错误和幻想还是有微妙区别的There is a fine line between wrong and visionary.不幸的是想看我出错除非你做梦Unfortunately you have to be a visionary to see it. 我的天你还真以为蹦到你脑子里的My god,you think that every thought每一个想法一定都是真金不怕火炼的That comes out of your head is pure gold.我告诉你Well,let me tell you something.你有些想法它就是一堆粪球Some of those thoughts are pure caca.粪球Caca就是一坨屎It means "doo-doo."够了All right!首先库萨帕里博士First of all,Dr. Koothrappali,我当初提议你跟我共事的时候...When I first proposed that you work with me..这么说我是跟你共事咯Aha! So I am working with you.在此语境下"跟我共事"就是指"为我做事"In this context,"with me" means for me."好吧在此语境下...Ah,well,in this context...你说我错了证明给我看If I'm wrong,prove it.好吧Okay.这里我们推导出了暗物质粒子的质量Here's where we derive the mass of the Dark Matter particle. 不不No,no,no.你对它原子量的表述是错误的You've misstated the atomic weight of the target.-让我说完-你这是在毁了我的研究- Let me finish. - You're defacing my work.不对我是在修正你的研究I'm not defacing it,I'm fixing it.-把白板擦给我-不要- Give me the eraser. - No.我说了把白板擦给我I said give it to me.有本事就来拿Come and get it.好吧Fine.上帝啊Oh,lord.库萨帕里博士Dr. Koothrappali,我以你上级的身份禁止你在我的白板上写字As your superior,I forbid you from writing on my board! 你才不是我的上级You are not my superior.从各方面看我都占优势I am in every way.是吗Oh,yeah?这个你能做到吗Can you do this?很高兴与您共事Nice working with you.抱歉说错了是为您做事I'm sorry-- for you.拉杰Raj...拉杰拉杰Raj... Raj...我很忙I'm busy.忙什么Doing what?好吧你说得很清楚了All right,you've made your point. 你来干什么谢尔顿What do you want,Sheldon?我仔细看了板上的内容I looked over the board结果证明你是对的And it turns out you were right.-这么说你错了-我可没这么说- So you were wrong. - I didn't say that.这是唯一合乎逻辑的推理That's the only logical inference.尽管如此反正我没说过Nevertheless,I didn't say it.总之我想请你回来帮我做事Anyway,I would like you to come back and work for me. 是帮你做事还是跟你共事For you or with you?在此语境下"帮我做事"也指"跟我共事"In this coext "for me" could mean "with me."好吧但我有几个条件All right,but I have some conditions.-我一概拒绝-我接受这份工作- I reject them all. - I'll take the job.周一见See you Monday.等等你得载我回家Wait,you have to drive me home.-你怎么来的-走路来的- How did you get here? - I walked.-那就再走回去-不行- So walk home. - I can't.外面有条大狗...There's a big dog outside...回家路上我们可以开始想想On the way home,we can start thinking为500GeV的粒子优化探测器的办法About methods of optimizing the detector for 500 GeV particles 好吧All right.。

生活大爆炸S3学习笔记

s03e01 The Electric Can Opener Fluctuation1.普通级词汇sass：vt. 对…出言不逊,说无礼的话effusive：adj. 流出的,感情奔放的luau：n. (常伴有文娱节目的)夏威夷式宴会toga：n. (古罗马)宽外袍,罗马主题plummeting：adj. 骤然下降,像铅球那样急速垂直下降般obnoxious：adj. 可憎的,不愉快的dictator：n. 独裁者Dickensian：adj. 如同狄更斯笔下的人物那样自私、消沉repentance：n. 悔改Mush：int. 走!,前进!trouper：n. 演员,老练演员buoy：n. 救生圈vt. 使浮起;鼓舞,激励trajectory：n. 轨道detour：n. 绕路,迂回blunder：n. 大错scathing：adj. 严厉的,尖刻的doozy：n. 非常好或非常糟糕的东西heathen：n. 异教徒turtleneck：n. 高领tumbleweeds：n. 风滚草red-eye：n. 通宵航班demon：n. 魔鬼2.爆炸级词汇post hoc ergo propter hoc：[拉丁语]发生于其后者必然是其结果(指一种普通的逻辑上的谬误，即后此谬误) Vulcan：瓦肯人(from the Star Trek),相信大家都不陌生了,Spock那群人,耳朵尖尖,听力好,有如葫芦娃里二娃的顺风耳(字幕组真是油菜)cosmological constant：宇宙常数,含宇宙常数项的场方程是R_uv-1/2*R*g_uv+L*g_uv=κ*T_uv,其中L代表宇宙常数,其物理意义是宇宙真空场。

L*g_uv为宇宙常数项。

R_uv为里契张量,代表空间的弯曲状况。

T_uv 为能量-动量张量,代表物质分布和运动状况。

g_uv为度规,κ为系数,可由低速的牛顿理论来确定。

"_"后字母为下标。

生活大爆炸3

生活大爆炸3
《生活大爆炸》是一部以科学家们的日常生活为主要题材的美国情景喜剧。

第三季在2009年9月21日首播，共23集。

故事还是围绕四位天才科学家莱纳德、谢耳朵、霍华德和拉杰的生活展开，他们已经成为众人眼中的科学怪人，四个人的个性各异，他们身处不同的爱情、职业、友谊等问题中。

在这一季中，我们看到了莱纳德试图与前女友斯蒂芬妮复合的努力，谢耳朵与女友布兰妮的分手和复合，霍华德在妻子伯纳黛特的帮助下逃离了空间站的险境，拉杰遇到了自闭症女孩莎拉时面临的困惑。

这一季也展现了众多著名科学家和名人客串出演，包括肯·詹金斯和斯蒂芬·霍金等。

整个故事情节新颖，对人物性格及爱情观等进行了深入解析，另外还涉及到社交网络、动画、游戏等领域的话题。

这一季的高潮部分是谢耳朵与布兰妮的分手，这是因为谢耳朵的分手技巧不够出色。

他向朋友求助后学会了一些方法，但最终还是因为他的本性问题导致了分手。

这场分手让观众看到了爱情的复杂性和不确定性。

总之，这一季的《生活大爆炸》融合了科技、文化、爱情等多种元素，给观众带来了轻松有趣和难忘的感受！。

生活大爆炸第三季剧本(英文版)S3E13

Big Bang Theory TranscriptsS3E13 – The Bozeman ReactionScene: A Chinese restaurant.Howard: Boy, seems like forever since the four of us have been out to eat, you know? Just the guys. Raj: Oh, God! Yes, we get it. You have a girlfriend now.Howard: A little jealous, are we?Raj: No, I’m not jealous. All right, I’d kill a hobo if it’ll get me laid. Now, can we order?Sheldon: Oh, dear Lord, they re-did the menu.Leonard: So what? It’s the same food.Sheldon:Oh, is it? Look at this. General Tso’s Chicken is no longer listed under specialties. It’s now under chicken.Raj: So?Sheldon: Y es, General Tso.Raj: Not Tso the chicken, so the question. So?Sheldon: So, why is it no longer a specialty? Did the chef lose confidence in the dish or himself? And look over here, shrimp in mobster sauce. What is mobster sauce?Leonard:It’s obviously a typo.Sheldon: Perhaps. Perhaps this restaurant’s now a front for organized crime. For all we know, the mobster sauce contains actual chunks of deceased mobsters.Raj: No, no, no, no, I think it just means it’s the kind of sauce that mobsters like.Howard: It doesn’t mean any of that! It’s a typo.Leonard:You know what? Let’s just get a pizza.Sheldon: Good idea. We’ll go to Corleone’s.Howard: Sure, no mobsters thereScene: The stairwell.Sheldon: You know, the more I think about it, the mobster sauce couldn’t possibly contain chunks of mobster.Leonard: And why is that?Sheldon: It was listed under seafood.Leonard: What if they were mobsters who slept with the fishes?Sheldon: Leonard, are we having a serious conversation or not?Leonard (noticing their door has been broken open): What the…?Sheldon: The TV is gone.Leonard: So are our laptops.Sheldon: Oh God, oh God, oh, God! It’s all right. They didn’t take my comic books.Credits sequence.Scene: The apartment.Sheldon: They took our TV, two laptops, four external hard-drives, our PS2, our PS3, our X-Box, our X-Box 360, our classic Nintendo, our Super Nintendo, our Nintendo 64 and our Wii.Leonard: We like games.Sheldon: Right, games. They took Halo 1, Halo 2, Halo 3, Call of Duty 1, Call of Duty 2, Call of Duty 3, Rock Band, Rock Band 2, Final Fantasy 1 thru 9, The Legend of Zelda, The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time, The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess, Super Mario Brothers, Super Mario Galaxy, Mario and Sonic at the Winter Olympics and Ms. Pacman.Policeman: Assorted video games.Sheldon: When does the CSI team get here?Policeman: What?Sheldon: In anticipation of their arrival, I’ve bagged some evidence. O ne of the thieves had the audacity to quench his thirst while ransacking our home. You should be able to pull some good prints off this. And now, here are my prints so you can rule me out as a suspect.Leonard: What about me?Sheldon: I’m sorry, Leonard. It’s too early to discount the possibility of this being an inside job.Leonard: Would I be completely out of line to ask you to shoot him?Policeman: I’d be happy to put him under a 72-hour psychiatric hold.Sheldon:I’m not crazy. My mother had me tested.Policeman:We’re done here. Call this number, and we’ll fax you a copy of the report so you can submit it to your insurance company.Sheldon:I’m sorry, that’s the end of your inquiry?Policeman: Do you have any more information that might be relevant?Sheldon: Oh, my goodness. Where do I begin? For instance, my laptop contained four out of the five gedanken experiments necessary for a cogent restatement of the quantum measurement problem. Leonard: How is that going to help them?Sheldon:Well, they could monitor scientific publications and see if anyone posts such a cogent restatement in the next couple of months. If so, the authors are most likely in possession of my stolen laptop.Policeman: Good night, fellas. Come on, Bochco.Leonard: What are we supposed to do now?Sheldon: The only thing we can do. Watch TV on our phones until the criminals return and bludgeon us to death in our sleep.Leonard:Does that mean you’ve ruled me out as a suspect?Sheldon: Oh, how I wish I could.Scene: Sheldon’s bedroom. Sheldon is restless. He gets up and checks the door is locked. He then moves his chest of drawers in front of the door. Goes back to bed.Sheldon: I do not have to urinate. I am the master of my own bladder. Drat.Scene: Penny’s apartment.Penny:I can’t believe it. If I hadn’t been working the dinner shift, I would’ve runright into the robbers.Leonard: Hey, there’s no reason for you to be scared.Penny:I’m not scared. I would’ve gone all Nebraska on their asses.Sheldon:(Knock, knock, knock) Leonard and Penny. (Knock, knock, knock) Leonard and Penny. (Knock, knock, knock) Leonard and Penny.Leonard: Hand me the bat.Sheldon: We just had a major crime in the building, and you open the door without asking who it is? Penny:It won’t happen again, what’s up?Sheldon: Nothing. Just wanted to see if you were both okay.Leonard: We’re fine, Sheldon.Sheldon: All right, then. Good night.Penny: Good night. That was weird, even for him.Leonard: Mm-hmm.Sheldon:(Knock, knock, knock) Leonard and Penny. (Knock, knock, knock) Leonard and Penny. (Knock,knock, knock) Leonard and Penny.Penny: Who is it?Sheldon: Sheldon. Sheldon Cooper.Penny: Yes?Sheldon: May I come in?Penny: Yeah.Sheldon:I see you’re drinking wine.Leonard:Yes, we are. And we’re about to go to bed.Sheldon: Uh-huh.Penny: Sheldon, do you want to sleep here tonight?Sheldon:Oh, as small as Leonard is, I don’t think the two of you’d be comfortable on the couch. Leonard: What do you want?Sheldon:It’s not what I want, it’s what evolution wants. Human beings are primates. Primates have evolved to live in groups, both for protection and support.Leonard:But you don’t like other people.Sheldon:I do tonight. It’s scary over there.Leonard:It’s getting scary here, too.Scene: The apartment. Sheldon is drawing picture clues on his whiteboard.Penny: Um… three little kittens? Three little pigs? God, I don’t know. Star Wars?Leonard: Did we win? Can we go to bed?Sheldon: Good Lord, I could not have made this easier. Hydrogen atom, H, plus pigs minus pea, Higgs. Bow, General Zod trapped in the Phantom Zone. Bow-zone. Pear. Tickle. Pear-tickle. Higgs Boson Particle. How could you not get that?Leonard:He’s right, Penny. It’s all there.Penny:Look, Sheldon, sweetie, I know you’re feeling insecure, but we’ve really got to go to sleep. Sheldon:All right. I’ll take the first watch and wake you at 0400.Leonard: Great. Good night.Penny: Wait, wait, what’s 0400?Leonard: 4am.Penny: That’s, like, in 45 minutes.Leonard: Just keep walking. (Sheldon checks door then puts TV on his phone)Woman on TV:It’s quiet out there.Man on TV: Maybe a little too quiet.Woman on TV: Where are you going?Man on TV: Just gonna take a look around outside.Sheldon: Bad idea.Woman on TV:No, Jim, don’t open the door!Sheldon: Listen to her, Jim.Man on TV: Don’t worry, there’s no one out here. (Sound of woman screaming. Sheldon nods, and turns off TV. Walks down to Leonard’s room.)Sheldon:(Knock, knock, knock) Leonard and Penny! (Knock, knock, knock) Leonard and Penny! (Knock, knock, knock) Leonard and Penny!Leonard: Who is it?Scene: Outside the apartment.Howard: All right, we’ve got a titanium dead bolt and a reinforced jamb controlled by a state-of-the-art electronic access system.Sheldon: What if they cut the power?Raj: There’s a 200-watt uninterruptible backup power supply.Sheldon: What if someone steals my keys?Raj: There are independent voice and fingerprint scanners.Sheldon: What if someone kidnaps me, forces me to record my voice, and then cuts off my thumb? Leonard: I’ll send them a basket of muffins.Howard: Now, inside, we’ve got motion detectors, infrared sensors, and cameras connected to a server running state-of-the-art facial recognition software.Leonard: Where did you get all this stuff?Howard: I got a buddy over at the Department of Defence.Leonard: He just gave it to you?Howard:I’m sure he would have if I had asked. Ironically, their security isn’t all that good.Penny (entering): Raj, your car is blocking me… (A wire net falls on her, while a computer voice repeats the words “Intruder Alert”) What the hell?Leonard: Sorry, let me help you.Sheldon:Wonderful security system if we’re attacked by a school of tuna.Howard: Don’t worry, the net’s going to be electrified. Picture her on the floor, spasming uncontrollably. Sheldon: Better.Scene: Sheldon’s bedroom.Sheldon: Sheldon’s journal. Security system in place. However, sleep continues to elude me. I’ve seen the underbelly of Pasadena, this so-called City of Roses, and it haunts me. Ah, the injustice, I lie here awake, tormented, while out there evil lurks, probably playing Donkey Kong on my classic Nintendo. (Hears a noise. Goes to check, then panics and climbs out window onto ledge.) Oh, dear. I am the master of my own bladder. (Crawls al ong to Leonard’s window, where Leonard and Penny are inside being intimate. Knock, knock, knock) Leonard and Penny. (Knock, knock, knock) Leonard and Penny.(Knock, knock, knock) Leonard and Penny.Penny: Oh, my…Leonard: God, Sheldon. What the hell are you doing out there?Sheldon: I heard a noise.Leonard: It was us. We knocked over a lamp.Sheldon: Why would you knock over a lamp?Leonard:We were going to have…Penny:He doesn’t need to know what we were doing, Leonard.Sheldon:Oh! No, she’s right, I don’t need to know what you were doing. Carry on. (Starts to climb back out of window)Leonard: What are you doing? Use the door.Sheldon:Good thinking. Perhaps I’ll check the perimeter and make some warm milk.Leonard: Great, you do that.Sheldon: Would you like me to bring you some warm milk?Leonard:I’m lactose intolerant.Sheldon:And you don’t wish to alarm me with any more loud noises, very thoughtful. Warm milk, Penny? Penny: No, thanks.Sheldon: Fine. Good night to you, sir. Miss.Leonard: Sorry about that.Penny: Ugh, what can you do? Here. (From outside there is the sound of the net falling and computer voice saying “Intruder alert.” Then Sheldon screaming. They run out to find Sheldon convulsing under the net.) Leonard: Looks like Wolowitz got the net electrified.Penny: Sheldon, are you okay?Sheldon:I’m fine. Although I’m no longer the master of my own bladder.Scene: The apartment.Sheldon: My new computer came with Windows 7. Windows 7 is much more user-friendly than Windows Vista. I don’t like that.Leonard: Don’t you think looking for a new city to live in is a bit of an overreaction?Sheldon:Our apartment was broken into, our security system tried to kill me, and as a result, I’m leaving Pasadena forever. Tell me how that’s overreacting.Penny:Come on, Sheldon, you can’t move. Don’t you need to stay in one place so the mother ship can find you when it returns?Sheldon:Oh, if that were only true. Unfortunately, as I’m earthbound for the foreseeable future, I need to find a location that’s more hospitable than the mean streets of Pasadena. Like Enid, Oklahoma. Low crime rate and high-speed Internet connectivity, but no model train shops. Sorry, Enid.Penny: Is he quitting his job at the university?Leonard:Oh, no, he’s going to telecommute. Everybody’s really excited about it.Sheldon:All right. Boone, North Carolina. Every summer since 1952, Boone has hosted an outdoor amphitheater portrayal of the life and times of its namesake, Dan’l Boone. Sounds like something that would attract the wrong crowd. Penny, you’re from Nebraska, correct?Penny: Born and raised. (Sheldon crosses Nebraska off his map)Scene: Sheldon’s bedroom. Sheldon is packing.Sheldon: It will take me a few days to get settled. After I do, I will e-mail you detailed PDFs containing diagrams and instructions that will guide you through packing and shipping the rest of my possessions to Bozeman, Montana. In the meantime, please forward my mail.Leonard: Any place specific or just the Bozeman, Montana Loony Bin?Sheldon: I sense you’re making a joke, but Bozeman does have a comedy club called The Loony Bin, so do not forward my mail there.Howard:Oh, come on. So you were the victim of a crime. That’s part of life. When my great- grandfather first came to this country, he put all his hopes and dreams into this little butcher shop he ran on the Lower East Side of New York. You know what happened? Every customer who walked into that butcher shop and asked for a pound of liver, got ripped off. But, those people moved on, and so should you.Sheldon: I am moving on. I’m going to be a Bozite.Leonard: They call themselves Bozites?Sheldon:They should. It’s one of the first things I plan to bring up upon arrival.Penny: Sheldon, I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I’m going to miss you.Sheldon:Please, Penny, as you know, I’m not comfortable with prolonged good-byes and maudlin displays of emotion, so I prepared a short video.Sheldon on laptop screen: Greetings. As you know, I’m not comfortable with prolonged good-byes and maudlin displays of emotion, so I prepared this short video. The four of you are three of my closest friends and one treasured acquaintance. Though I cannot state categorically that my life will be diminished by not having you in it, I am comfortable if you choose to believe that. Since you intend to remain in this lawless metropolitan area, statistics suggest that you will succumb to tragic and gruesome ends before we meet again. Live long and prosper.Penny:Sheldon, that’s so… (Turns to find he has gone.)Sheldon (entering again): You might want to lock the door behind me. This isn’t Bozeman.Howard (after Raj whispers to him): How the hell do I know who’s the friend and who’s the acquaintance?Scene: Bozeman, Montana bus depot.Sheldon: That is a bracing cold, an invigorating cold. Lord, is it cold!Man: Help you with your bags, sir?Sheldon: Thank you, fellow Bozite. And may I say, you are the living embodiment of all the promises made by our lovely town’s Chamber of Commerce. (Man picks up bags and starts running.) Wait! Wait! Excuse me! (At ticket desk) One ticket to Pasadena, California, please.Scene: The apartment. Sheldon enters.Howard:Hey, look who’s back!Sheldon: Interesting. The acquaintance is the first to greet me.。

生活大爆炸第三季(美剧)

基本信息中文名: 生活大爆炸[1]第三季美剧《生活大爆炸第三季》海报酷优网提供英文名称: The Big Bang Theory Season3版本: [双语字幕][][RMVB+HR-HDTV]电视台: 美国CBS电视台首播时间: 2009年演员: Johnny Galecki ... Leonard Hofstadter (18 episodes, 2007-2008)Jim Parsons ... Sheldon Cooper (18 episodes, 2007-2008)Kaley Cuoco ... Penny (18 episodes,2007-2008)Simon Helberg ... Howard Wolowitz (18 episodes, 2007-2008)Kunal Nayyar ... Rajnesh Koothrappali / ... (18 episodes, 2007-2008)地区: 美国语言: 英语剧情介绍（译自CBS官方新闻发布稿）这是一部以"科学天才" 为背景的情景喜剧，这倒非常罕见。

主人公Leonard (Johnny Galecki,生活大爆炸第三季剧照(5张) "Roseanne") 和Sheldon (Jim Parsons "Judging Amy")是一对好朋友，他们的智商绝对高人一等，因为他们对量子物理学理论可以倒背如流，无论你问他们什么问题，都难不倒他们。

但是说到日常生活，这两个不修边幅的男孩就彻底没了脾气－－生活中柴米油盐这些看似简单的事情，却让他们有迷失在太空里一样的感觉，他们所掌握的那些科学原理在这里根本没有用武之地。

直到有一天……隔壁搬来一位美貌性感的女孩Penny (Kaley Cuoco, "8 SimpleRules...")，顿时吸引了两人的目光。

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00:03:17,210 --> 00:03:18,810生活大爆炸第三季第三集200:00:01,380 --> 00:00:04,720今晚我要出去心情大好I'm going out tonight, I'm feelin' alright300:00:04,810 --> 00:00:08,800我要好好爽一下Gonna let it all hang out400:00:09,050 --> 00:00:12,840放声歌唱升三个八度Wanna make some noise, really raise my voice500:00:13,010 --> 00:00:16,880耶我要大唱大叫Y eah, I wanna scream and shout600:00:16,880 --> 00:00:20,420滴滴啦啦De-de-de, de-de-de-de-de, uh700:00:20,630 --> 00:00:24,130不早安谢尔顿和我一起跳舞吧No.. Morning, Sheldon. Come dance with me.800:00:25,900 --> 00:00:27,370不要No.900:00:27,430 --> 00:00:29,940干嘛不要Why not?00:00:29,990 --> 00:00:32,440佩妮我支持"多个世界"理论Penny, while I subscribe to1100:00:32,510 --> 00:00:34,940这个理论表明The "many worlds" theory which pots the existence1200:00:34,990 --> 00:00:36,540在无限个宇宙中存在着Of an infinite number of sheldons1300:00:36,610 --> 00:00:38,210无限个谢尔顿In an infinite number of universes,1400:00:38,280 --> 00:00:41,630我向你保证其中没一个"我"是在跳舞的I assure you that in none of them am I dancing.1500:00:42,220 --> 00:00:45,950那这些"你"里有没有幽默一点的Are you fun in any of them?1600:00:46,020 --> 00:00:46,870根据推算The math would suggest1700:00:46,950 --> 00:00:49,640其中有几个"我"是糖娃娃That in a few I'm a clown made of candy.1800:00:50,940 --> 00:00:52,600但是绝不跳舞But I don't dance.1900:00:53,450 --> 00:00:54,880行吧来点法式吐司不Alright, want some French toast?2000:00:54,910 --> 00:00:56,980今天是燕麦粥日It's oatmeal day.2100:00:57,050 --> 00:01:01,450这样吧下个法式吐司日我给你煮燕麦粥Tell you what, next French toast day, I'll make you oatmeal.2200:01:01,520 --> 00:01:05,150神啊你还要在这赖到法式吐司日啊Dear lord, are you still going to be here on French toast day?2300:01:09,330 --> 00:01:10,580早啊Morning.2400:01:10,610 --> 00:01:11,560莱纳德你看啊Look, Leonard,2500:01:11,610 --> 00:01:13,500佩妮烤了法式吐司Penny made French toast.2600:01:13,560 --> 00:01:15,900抱歉我还没给她你的用餐日程表Sorry I haven't given her your schedule yet.2700:01:15,950 --> 00:01:17,530那是个iCal[Apple电子日程表]下载啊It's an iCal download.2800:01:17,580 --> 00:01:19,270她可以直接下到手机里的She can put it right in her phone.2900:01:19,340 --> 00:01:20,990而且我想咱们说好了的And I thought we agreed3000:01:21,010 --> 00:01:23,590你们只在她那儿行房事That you'd have your conjugal visits in her apartment.3100:01:23,670 --> 00:01:26,510是说好了但是现在是特殊情况We did, but there were extenuating circumstances.3200:01:26,590 --> 00:01:27,580我明白了I see.3300:01:27,630 --> 00:01:29,040她浑身的傻气Did her abysmal housekeeping skills3400:01:29,100 --> 00:01:30,880终于被她那盖世的家务活能力打压下去了是吗Finally trump her perkiness?3500:01:32,220 --> 00:01:37,090不是她的床有点散架了No, her bed kind of... Broke.3600:01:37,150 --> 00:01:39,420这是不太可能的That doesn't seem likely.3700:01:39,490 --> 00:01:41,740她的床的构造很结实Her bed's of sturdy construction.3800:01:41,810 --> 00:01:42,630就算多承重一个Even the addition of a second3900:01:42,680 --> 00:01:45,310正常体型的人类也不会引致其床架松动的Normal size human being wouldn't cause a structural failure,4000:01:45,400 --> 00:01:47,950更别提像你这样的小雏形人了Much less a homunculus such as yourself.4100:01:49,270 --> 00:01:50,620小雏形人A homunculus?4200:01:50,700 --> 00:01:54,040功能健全的迷你型人类Perfectly formed miniature human being.4300:01:54,120 --> 00:01:58,440你这我的小宝贝雏形人Oh, you're my little homunculus.4400:01:58,510 --> 00:02:00,010别这样Don't do that.4500:02:00,580 --> 00:02:03,220抱歉好啦谁要普通糖浆谁要肉桂糖浆呀Sorry. Okay, who wants syrup and who wants cinnamon sugar?4600:02:03,220 --> 00:02:04,400我要燕麦粥I want oatmeal.4700:02:04,470 --> 00:02:05,570行啊Y es, well4800:02:05,600 --> 00:02:08,280我想要个室友不是大混蛋的男朋友I want a boyfriend whose roommate isn't a giant pain in the ass.4900:02:08,750 --> 00:02:11,080这个愿望很快就能实现了I'm sure that will happen soon enough.5000:02:11,770 --> 00:02:14,590但我还是要燕麦粥But in the meantime, I still want oatmeal.5100:02:15,160 --> 00:02:16,790得了我投降Y ou know what, I give up.5200:02:16,860 --> 00:02:17,990怎么会有他这种人He's impossible.5300:02:17,990 --> 00:02:20,850怎么会没有我就是存在的I can't be impossible, I exist.00:02:20,910 --> 00:02:22,700我相信你想说的是I believe what you meant to say is,5500:02:22,750 --> 00:02:25,230"我投降这种人几乎是不存在的""I give up, he's improbable."5600:02:30,810 --> 00:02:32,890谢尔顿你真得换个方式Sheldon, you really need to find a better way5700:02:32,980 --> 00:02:34,140和佩妮相处了Of dealing with penny.5800:02:34,140 --> 00:02:35,380那我该怎么做What am I supposed to do--5900:02:35,450 --> 00:02:37,180在礼拜一吃法式吐司吗Eat french toast on a Monday?6000:02:37,230 --> 00:02:39,880这种情况才是不存在的Now, that would be impossible.6100:02:40,450 --> 00:02:42,570我只是说你想抓苍蝇的话得用蜂蜜I'm just saying, you can catch more flies with honey6200:02:42,600 --> 00:02:43,770而不是醋Than with vinegar.6300:02:43,840 --> 00:02:45,890你用粪粪还能抓更多呢Y ou can catch even more flies with manure.6400:02:45,960 --> 00:02:47,260你到底想说什么What's your point?6500:02:47,320 --> 00:02:48,890这个...It's a...6600:02:53,280 --> 00:02:55,700天还挺香的呢Boy, that does smell good.6700:02:55,770 --> 00:02:57,150太遗憾了今儿就是礼拜一Too bad it's Monday.6800:03:25,510 --> 00:03:28,220我们经理基姆去休产假了Okay, Kim the night manager went on maternity leave6900:03:28,310 --> 00:03:29,940她老公叫桑迪And her husband's name is Sandy, right?7000:03:30,010 --> 00:03:31,210然后So get this--7100:03:31,280 --> 00:03:33,500顶她班的是一个叫桑迪的女人Her replacement is a woman named Sandy7200:03:33,560 --> 00:03:35,870而她老公叫基姆Whose husband's name is Kim.7300:03:39,020 --> 00:03:41,290-哇啊-是啊- Wow! - I know!7400:03:41,350 --> 00:03:43,150这什么概率哦What are the odds?7500:03:43,160 --> 00:03:44,210很好算嘛Easily calculable.7600:03:44,290 --> 00:03:46,130先找到几对双方都取中性名字的We begin by identifying a set of married couples7700:03:46,190 --> 00:03:47,530已婚夫妇With unisex names.7800:03:47,580 --> 00:03:48,910然后剔除那些不适合We then eliminate those unqualified7900:03:49,000 --> 00:03:49,630从事餐饮工作的For restaurant work--8000:03:49,700 --> 00:03:52,230比如说年老的坐牢的残疾的The aged, the imprisoned and the limbless, for example,8100:03:52,230 --> 00:03:54,420-再然后就-谢尔顿- Next we look at... - Sheldon--8200:03:54,500 --> 00:03:56,090这是一个奇妙的巧合It's an amazing coincidence.8300:03:56,170 --> 00:03:57,640就这样了行吗Can we leave it at that?8400:03:57,710 --> 00:04:00,840对不起I'm sorry.8500:04:01,010 --> 00:04:05,340喔佩妮你们奶酪蛋糕工厂就好像是巫婆们开的Ooh, Penny. It's as if the cheese-cake factory is run by witches.8600:04:08,450 --> 00:04:12,420喔谢尔顿别以为我不会揍你Ooh, Sheldon, it's as if you don't think I'll punch you.8700:04:13,490 --> 00:04:15,860行啦你俩别吵了Come on, you guys, let it go.8800:04:15,910 --> 00:04:17,040哼随便吧Fine, whatever.8900:04:17,120 --> 00:04:19,530你吃完了吗Are you finished?9000:04:19,580 --> 00:04:20,990谢了Well, thank you.9100:04:21,050 --> 00:04:22,910多么体贴How thoughtful.9200:04:23,000 --> 00:04:24,910你要吃巧克力吗Would you like a chocolate?9300:04:25,000 --> 00:04:26,880好啊Um, yeah, sure.9400:04:29,790 --> 00:04:31,590多谢啦Thanks.9500:04:33,010 --> 00:04:35,940这算什么What was that?9600:04:36,010 --> 00:04:38,730你让我对佩妮好点的Y ou said be nice to Penny.9700:04:38,810 --> 00:04:40,510我觉得给别人喂巧克力I believe offering chocolate to someone00:04:40,560 --> 00:04:42,780能够符合"好"的定义Falls within the definition of nice.9900:04:42,850 --> 00:04:44,200没错It does.10000:04:44,270 --> 00:04:46,870但就我观察你这人不符合But in my experience, you don't.10100:04:46,940 --> 00:04:50,490何瑞修宇宙间无奇不有There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio,10200:04:50,560 --> 00:04:52,480不是你的哲学全能梦想得到的[<哈姆雷特>第一幕;第五景]Than are dreamt of in your philosophy10300:04:52,540 --> 00:04:54,230这才是你嘛Now that's you10400:04:54,280 --> 00:04:56,450讨厌而且让人难以忍受Obnoxious and insufferable.10500:05:02,840 --> 00:05:05,590日居者们你们好啊What's going on, day dwellers?10600:05:05,660 --> 00:05:10,540KISS[美重金属乐队]粉丝团也废除了"不许问不许说"[美军处理同性恋旧政策]吗Oh, man, did the kiss army repeal "don't ask, don't tell"?10700:05:10,610 --> 00:05:11,750不是No.10800:05:11,800 --> 00:05:14,910我和拉杰要去好莱坞的哥特夜总会Raj and I are going to a goth club in Hollywood10900:05:14,970 --> 00:05:16,950和夜猫子一起玩儿To hang with the night people.11000:05:17,970 --> 00:05:19,350有人想一起去吗Anybody want to come along?11100:05:19,420 --> 00:05:21,960你真要这样上街吗Oh, wow, you're actually going out like that?11200:05:22,020 --> 00:05:23,510不不No, no.11300:05:23,590 --> 00:05:25,310我要这样上街I'm going out like this...11400:05:27,530 --> 00:05:29,480霍华德你做了些什么Howard, what did you do?11500:05:29,560 --> 00:05:31,010这叫纹身袖They're called tattoo sleeves.11600:05:31,080 --> 00:05:32,130看Look.11700:05:34,190 --> 00:05:35,440我在网上买的拉杰也买了一身I go them online! Raj got a set, too..11800:05:39,640 --> 00:05:40,820帅死了是吧Fantastic, right?11900:05:40,910 --> 00:05:43,030穿上它就能和前卫女孩Put them on, have hot sex with some freaky girl12000:05:43,110 --> 00:05:45,030发生韵事脱下他With her business pierced, take them off,12100:05:45,110 --> 00:05:47,610我依旧是个恪礼守节的犹太人I can still be buried in a jewish cemetery.12200:05:48,780 --> 00:05:50,120知道吗Y ou know, I've always wanted12300:05:50,200 --> 00:05:51,320我一直都想去哥特夜总会To go to a goth nightclub.12400:05:51,370 --> 00:05:52,320真的吗Really?12500:05:52,370 --> 00:05:53,590才怪呢Bazinga!12600:05:55,060 --> 00:05:59,160没有人能察觉到我的玩笑对吧None of you ever see my practical jokes coming, do you?12700:05:59,210 --> 00:06:01,090你们俩去吗Okay, how about you two?12800:06:01,160 --> 00:06:03,710我还带了几个纹身袖Look, I've got some extra tatoo sleeves.12900:06:03,800 --> 00:06:05,830你带那么多干什么Why are you carrying extras?13000:06:05,900 --> 00:06:08,840万一被哪个女人的乳环刮破了好有个替换呀In case I snag one on someone's nipple ring.13100:06:08,900 --> 00:06:11,440我们就不去了Uh, yeah, I think we'll pass.13200:06:11,510 --> 00:06:16,510你现在就得"妻管严"了吗Oh, is the missus speaking for the couple now?13300:06:16,580 --> 00:06:19,610这件事肯定她说了算In this case, you bet she is.13400:06:21,850 --> 00:06:24,400是啊她很强势他受压迫Y es, she's pushy, and yes, he's whipped,13500:06:24,490 --> 00:06:28,240但是不能这么说But that's not the expression.13600:06:29,740 --> 00:06:32,160快走我要去沃尔格林药店Come on, I want to stop at walgreens13700:06:32,240 --> 00:06:34,030再多买几支眼线笔And pick up some more eyeliner.13800:06:37,180 --> 00:06:41,200他们在夜总会要被揍了They're gonna get beaten up at that club.13900:06:41,270 --> 00:06:44,400我看他们在药店就会被揍They're gonna get beaten up at walgreens.14000:06:47,890 --> 00:06:48,980抱歉谢尔顿Oh, sorry, Sheldon.14100:06:49,040 --> 00:06:50,380我差点坐在你的专座上I almost sat in your spot.14200:06:50,440 --> 00:06:53,230是吗我都没注意Did you? I didn't notice.14300:06:53,310 --> 00:06:55,180给你块巧克力吧Have a chocolate.14400:06:56,220 --> 00:06:58,180谢谢Thank you.14500:07:10,730 --> 00:07:15,000我觉得我们很适合这里I think we're fitting quite nicely.14600:07:15,070 --> 00:07:18,070要是你不喝低度啤酒就更好了It did help if you weren't drinking light beer.14700:07:18,120 --> 00:07:21,260喝伏特加和蔓越莓果汁就显得比我更有哥特风格吗What's so gothic about vodka and cranberry juice?14800:07:21,340 --> 00:07:23,880是啊这看起来像在饮血Hello? It looks like blood.14900:07:23,930 --> 00:07:25,750你没去看我发给你的Did you even read the "wiki how" link15000:07:25,800 --> 00:07:27,460手把手学哥特风格的WikiHow链接吗I sent you on being goth?15100:07:27,550 --> 00:07:30,130没我自己的东西还看不玩呢No, I'm behind on my wiki-reading.15200:07:30,220 --> 00:07:32,940我正在读约翰·格里沙姆[法律惊悚小说《掮客》作者] I'm kind of on a John Grisham kick right now.15300:07:33,020 --> 00:07:34,020什么What?15400:07:34,020 --> 00:07:36,050我看完了《绝对机密》I finished reading The Pelican Brief15500:07:36,090 --> 00:07:38,530我太喜欢了已经完全身临其境了And loved it so much, I dived right into the client.15600:07:38,590 --> 00:07:39,560他本身就是个律师He was a lawyer himself,15700:07:39,590 --> 00:07:43,260所以他的小说内容的准确性和娱乐性都很强So his novels are accurate as well as entertaining.15800:07:43,610 --> 00:07:49,070要记住我们是浪荡子暗夜之子Just remember we are lost boys, children of the night.15900:07:49,120 --> 00:07:51,570好的浪荡子暗夜之子Great. Lost boys, children of the night.16000:07:51,620 --> 00:07:52,790明白了Got it.16100:07:52,870 --> 00:07:56,630能帮忙把小吃递过来吗Can you pass the chex mix please?16200:07:57,910 --> 00:07:59,210谢谢Thank you.16300:08:02,180 --> 00:08:05,180我们是浪荡子We are lost boys.16400:08:05,250 --> 00:08:08,300是吗Good for you.16500:08:08,390 --> 00:08:11,590其实我比他更放浪I'm actually much more lost than he is.16600:08:13,480 --> 00:08:14,730纹身不错Nice ink.16700:08:14,730 --> 00:08:16,650谢谢Thanks.16800:08:16,700 --> 00:08:18,310能请两位小姐喝点东西吗Can we buy you ladies a drink?16900:08:19,370 --> 00:08:20,750两杯低度啤酒Two light beers.17000:08:20,820 --> 00:08:23,600低度啤酒吗"WiliHow"该把这个写进去Light beers. "Wiki how" about that?17100:08:25,320 --> 00:08:26,610你们叫什么What's your names?17200:08:26,660 --> 00:08:29,110-我叫霍华德拉杰-我是贝萨妮-I'm Howard. Raj. -I'm Bethany.17300:08:29,160 --> 00:08:30,540很高兴见到你贝萨妮Nice to meet you, Bethany.17400:08:30,610 --> 00:08:31,710很高兴Y es, very nice.17500:08:31,780 --> 00:08:33,210我也是Nice to meet you, too.17600:08:33,280 --> 00:08:35,080我叫莎拉I'm Sarah.17700:08:35,130 --> 00:08:36,920反正也没人关心Not that anyone cares.17800:08:39,900 --> 00:08:44,010两位小姐喜欢看约翰·格里沙姆的小说吗Do either of you ladies enjoy the novels of John Grisham?17900:08:53,100 --> 00:08:55,450这动画片叫什么来着What's this cartoon called again?18000:08:55,520 --> 00:08:59,170恶魔武士Oshikuru: Demon samurai.18100:08:59,240 --> 00:09:00,820恶魔武士不是动画片Demon it's not a cartoon.18200:09:00,910 --> 00:09:03,130是动漫It'anime.18300:09:03,190 --> 00:09:04,440动漫Anime.18400:09:04,510 --> 00:09:07,200高中时有个女生叫安娜·梅(Anime和Anna May谐音) Y ou know, I knew a girl in high school named Anna May.18500:09:07,280 --> 00:09:10,780安娜·梅·弗莱彻Anna May Fletcher.18600:09:10,780 --> 00:09:13,840她天生单鼻孔She was born with one nostril.18700:09:13,920 --> 00:09:15,910她后来的整鼻手术很失败Then she had this bad nose job18800:09:15,970 --> 00:09:17,910最后竟然弄成了三个鼻孔And basically wound up with three.18900:09:23,110 --> 00:09:26,320你现在经常混在这儿了Y ou're here a lot now.19000:09:26,380 --> 00:09:28,330我话太多了吗Oh, am I talking too much?19100:09:28,390 --> 00:09:29,440抱歉我不说了I'm sorry. Zip.19200:09:29,500 --> 00:09:30,570谢谢Thank you.19300:09:30,640 --> 00:09:32,910吃块巧克力吧Chocolate?19400:09:32,970 --> 00:09:35,310好的Y es please.19500:09:40,450 --> 00:09:42,670基姆你好Oh. Hey, Kim.19600:09:44,990 --> 00:09:46,040请你稍等一下Y ou know what,hold on.19700:09:46,120 --> 00:09:47,800我到楼道里去接电话Let me take this in the hall.19800:09:56,460 --> 00:09:59,130你绝对想不到他们找谁来接替你的工作Y ou'll never guess who they got to replace you at work.19900:10:00,670 --> 00:10:04,140我知道你在干什么了Okay, I know what you're doing.20000:10:04,200 --> 00:10:05,610真的吗Really?20100:10:05,670 --> 00:10:08,590你在用巧克力做正面教法Y es, you're ung chocolates as positive reinforcement20200:10:08,660 --> 00:10:12,060对你认为良好的行为进行奖励For what you consider correct behavior.20300:10:13,930 --> 00:10:15,920真聪明V ery good.20400:10:16,920 --> 00:10:17,880来块巧克力吗Chocole?20500:10:17,950 --> 00:10:20,970我不想要什么巧克力No, I don't want any chocolate!20600:10:23,220 --> 00:10:23,730谢尔顿Sheldon,20700:10:23,740 --> 00:10:28,730你不能拿我女朋友当实验鼠一样对待Y ou can't train my girlfend like a lab rat.20800:10:28,730 --> 00:10:31,630事实证明我可以Actually, it turns out I can.20900:10:31,630 --> 00:10:34,570你不应该这么做well, you shouldn't.21000:10:34,640 --> 00:10:36,700莱纳德就是没法让你满意是吧There's just no pleasing you, is there, Leonard?21100:10:36,790 --> 00:10:37,920你不满意Y ou weren't happy21200:10:38,010 --> 00:10:39,910我之前那样对她With my previous approach to dealing with her,21300:10:39,960 --> 00:10:42,680所以我决定根据桑代克和B.F.斯金纳的理论So I decided to employ operant conditioning techniques,21400:10:42,740 --> 00:10:44,910采取操作性条件反射的办法Building on the works of thorndike and B.F. Skinner.21500:10:44,980 --> 00:10:46,460下周的这个时候By this time next week,21600:10:46,550 --> 00:10:48,850我相信我能让她从水池里一跃而出I believe I can have her jumping out of a pool,21700:10:48,920 --> 00:10:51,750用鼻子平衡塑料气球Balancing a beach ball on her nose21800:10:51,820 --> 00:10:55,090不行这一套必须打住No, this has to stop now.21900:10:55,160 --> 00:10:59,280我不是真的建议让她从水池里跳出来I'm not suggesting we really make her jump out of a pool.22000:10:59,360 --> 00:11:01,190我以为你该听出了我的"才怪了"I thought the "bazinga" was implied.22100:11:01,260 --> 00:11:04,360咱们不过是调整她个性We're just tweaking her personality.22200:11:04,430 --> 00:11:06,600用另一种说法就是把那些粗糙表面磨磨光Sanding off the rough edges, if you will.22300:11:06,670 --> 00:11:08,820不行你不能磨佩妮No. Y ou're not sanding Penny.22400:11:08,870 --> 00:11:12,270你是说不许我使用Are you saying that I am forbidden22500:11:12,320 --> 00:11:15,320能让改进我们生活的From applying a harmless, scientifically valid protocol22600:11:15,410 --> 00:11:16,980无害的科学有效的正常手段That will make our lives better?22700:11:17,040 --> 00:11:19,980是的我不许Y es. Y ou're forbidden.22800:11:23,050 --> 00:11:24,220坏莱纳德Bad Leonard.22900:11:33,100 --> 00:11:34,970那你们俩是做什么的So, what do you guys do?23000:11:35,020 --> 00:11:37,270就是些哥特东西喽Oh, you know, goth stuff.23100:11:37,320 --> 00:11:39,190哥特杂志喽哥特音乐喽Goth magazines, goth music.23200:11:39,260 --> 00:11:40,830哥特食品喽Goth food.23300:11:41,580 --> 00:11:43,010什么哥特食品What's goth food?23400:11:44,280 --> 00:11:47,030呃黑焦三文鱼?Uh. Blackened salmon?23500:11:48,650 --> 00:11:51,320不是我是问你们的工作No, I meant what do you do for jobs?23600:11:51,370 --> 00:11:53,040我们是科学家Oh, we're scientists.23700:11:53,120 --> 00:11:55,430当然是黑科学的Y eah, you know, the dark sciences.23800:11:55,490 --> 00:11:57,340什么是黑科学What are the dark sciences?23900:11:57,430 --> 00:11:58,590我们We...24000:11:58,660 --> 00:12:00,930我是个天体物理学家Well, I am an astrophysicist,24100:12:01,000 --> 00:12:03,180很多工作都要在晚上进行And a lot of that takes place at night.24200:12:04,020 --> 00:12:06,170那时候也有吸血鬼呀When there are vampires24300:12:06,220 --> 00:12:09,060僵尸呀什么的到处乱跑And miscellaneous undead out and about.24400:12:13,340 --> 00:12:14,840听起来很酷啊That sounds really cool.24500:12:14,900 --> 00:12:18,780真的吗好吧要是你喜欢宇宙那类的Does it? Okay. If you like space stuff,24600:12:18,850 --> 00:12:20,870我设计国际太空站的部分呢I design components for the international space station,24700:12:20,950 --> 00:12:22,240在太空里Which is in space.24800:12:22,320 --> 00:12:24,850你肯定知道那里没人能听到你喊叫Where, as I'm sure you know, no one can hear you scream.24900:12:28,790 --> 00:12:29,880那么两位女士是做什么的So, what do you gals do?25000:12:29,910 --> 00:12:31,240我在盖普服装店I work at the gap.25100:12:31,330 --> 00:12:34,360真的可真有趣我曾经去过盖普啊Really? How about that? I've been to the gap.25200:12:34,420 --> 00:12:35,500我也去过I've been there, as well.25300:12:35,550 --> 00:12:38,530我喜欢你们那种有小口袋的T恤衫I like your t-shirts with the little pocket.25400:12:38,590 --> 00:12:43,090我也在那儿上班反正也没人关心I work the, too. Not that anyone cares.25500:12:44,340 --> 00:12:46,890这地方真无聊Y ou know, this place is boring.25600:12:46,980 --> 00:12:51,050可不咱们去别的地方开心开心吧Y eah why don't we go somewhere else and have some fun?25700:12:51,100 --> 00:12:52,150好啊Okay.25800:12:52,220 --> 00:12:53,600当然我们喜欢开心Sure we like fun.25900:12:53,680 --> 00:12:55,070我们是开心的人We are fun people.26000:12:55,150 --> 00:12:57,390又黑暗又开心Dark and fun.26100:12:57,440 --> 00:13:00,190来吧我知道一个地方你们肯定喜欢Come on. I know a place you'll really dig.26200:13:03,230 --> 00:13:04,390你带来黑色避孕套吗Did you bring the black condoms?26300:13:04,450 --> 00:13:05,560就在腰包包里啦In my fanny pack.26400:13:05,610 --> 00:13:06,610走吧Let's go.26500:13:13,620 --> 00:13:16,160现在高兴了Are you happy now?26600:13:18,040 --> 00:13:19,840没有特别高兴Not particularly26700:13:22,480 --> 00:13:26,800天啊她没有吧My god, she didn't!26800:13:26,870 --> 00:13:30,150她究竟在说什么要这么久What could she possibly be talking about for so long?26900:13:30,220 --> 00:13:33,270显然在芝士蛋糕厂做招待Obviously, waitressing at the cheesecake factory27000:13:33,360 --> 00:13:35,860是个复杂的社会经济性活动Is a complex socioeconomic activity27100:13:35,940 --> 00:13:39,680而且需要相当多的研究与计划That requires a great deal of analysis and planning.27200:13:40,850 --> 00:13:42,870才怪了"bazinga."27300:13:44,000 --> 00:13:46,840知道么采用Y ou know, using positive27400:13:46,900 --> 00:13:49,210正面鼓励式方法我能在一个星期之内Reinforcement techniques, I could train that behavior27500:13:49,270 --> 00:13:51,110让她改变这个恶习Out of her in a week.27600:13:51,180 --> 00:13:52,380不No.27700:13:52,440 --> 00:13:53,810要是你让我用负面鼓励法If you let me use negative reinforcement,27800:13:53,880 --> 00:13:56,110睡觉前我就能做到I can get it done before we go to bed.27900:13:56,180 --> 00:13:59,620你不能用水喷她的脸Y ou're not squirting her in the face with water.28000:13:59,670 --> 00:14:00,950当然不No, of course not.28100:14:01,000 --> 00:14:02,990我说的是十分轻微的电击法We're talking very mild electric shocks.28200:14:04,020 --> 00:14:06,370连组织损伤都不会有No tissue damage whatsoever.28300:14:06,440 --> 00:14:08,060别想了Forget it.28400:14:08,060 --> 00:14:10,340你不可能告诉我Oh, come on. Y ou can't tell me28500:14:10,410 --> 00:14:12,760给你打造一个更好的女朋友That you're not intrigued out the possibility28600:14:12,830 --> 00:14:14,660让你一点都不动心Of building a better girlfriend.28700:14:14,730 --> 00:14:16,070我没有I'm not.28800:14:16,130 --> 00:14:18,150佩妮的个性好的和坏的Well, and Penny's qualities, both good and bad,28900:14:18,240 --> 00:14:20,300合成了她这个人Are what make her who she is.29000:14:23,690 --> 00:14:26,860你是说比如那个让人无法忍受的尖笑声Y ou mean, like that high-pitched, irritating laugh?29100:14:29,250 --> 00:14:32,320你就不想希望一个低嗓门的笑声吗Y ou wouldn't prefer a throaty chuckle?29200:14:32,380 --> 00:14:35,050不许你改变佩妮的笑声Y ou're not changing how Penny laughs.29300:14:35,120 --> 00:14:37,090那才是荒诞呢No, that would be incongruous.29400:14:37,150 --> 00:14:38,590我打算把她的声音整体降低I was going to lower the whole voice29500:14:38,660 --> 00:14:40,970到一个令人愉快的音区To a more pleasing register.29600:14:41,040 --> 00:14:42,840对不起啦伙计Ugh. Sorry, guys.29700:14:42,930 --> 00:14:45,760那丫头是个怪物That girl is freaky.29800:14:45,830 --> 00:14:47,660再说一遍Come again?29900:14:47,710 --> 00:14:49,160怪物Freaky.30000:14:49,220 --> 00:14:50,250怪物Freaky?30100:14:50,320 --> 00:14:52,970怪物Ah, freaky.30200:14:58,580 --> 00:15:01,080吃块巧克力吧Have a chocolate.30300:15:02,860 --> 00:15:04,950谢谢Thank you.30400:15:12,360 --> 00:15:14,490你真打算破坏你的身体Are you seriously going to damage your body30500:15:14,540 --> 00:15:16,460就为了有可能吊上一个Just for the possibility you could have cheap sex30600:15:16,530 --> 00:15:18,340在酒吧里遇到的马子?With a strange girl you met in a bar?30700:15:19,910 --> 00:15:21,630当然Y eah!30800:15:21,700 --> 00:15:23,630你妈妈会怎么说What is your mother going to say?30900:15:23,700 --> 00:15:25,470她根本看不到那里She's not going to see it.31000:15:25,540 --> 00:15:28,220她现在量我体温都是放嘴里的She takes my temperature orally now.31100:15:31,440 --> 00:15:32,710霍华德你打算要什么样的What are you going to get, Howard?31200:15:32,760 --> 00:15:34,730我不知道该选Well, I can't really decide31300:15:34,810 --> 00:15:37,310尖叫魔鬼骇人小头骨Between a screaming devil, this mean little skull,31400:15:37,380 --> 00:15:39,720或是青蛙柯米特Or kermit the frog.31500:15:39,770 --> 00:15:42,130青蛙柯米特Kermit the frog? Y ou know.31600:15:42,200 --> 00:15:45,020你好我在霍华德的屁股上Hi-ho. I'm on Howard's butt.31700:15:46,160 --> 00:15:47,490刺个骇人小头骨Get the mean little skull,。

生活大爆炸 第三季 03

生活大爆炸第三季 剧本(英文版)S3E8

生活大爆炸第三季 剧本(英文版)S3E20