9到10人 英语剧本 ---孔雀东南飞现代搞笑版英文学习资料
英语搞笑短剧剧本
三打白骨精Three Times’ Beating Monster人物：T唐僧S：孙悟空E：猪八戒J：沙僧B：白骨精（何平）B1：B变成的村姑B2：B变成的太婆B3：B变化成的老头B3:Long long ago,in the acient age,there were three foolish man …..T S E一起看着B3：em?B3:eh,three brave person for the human’s peace went to the buddhist paradise.B2:now,they are acrossing the pleace named……（望着B1）B1:Don’t ask me ,I don’t know either 红色部分不要，换成英文的西游记片头曲B2:OK,let’s begine!（放好汉歌~）T: Emitofo,do you know where we are now?S: Bajie,map!E: (摸出，递给S)S: Look,boss (凑近T)………（T、S一齐转向E）T: Bajie!How Many times I have told you, don’t bring these pictures of beautiful girls!E: Oh, boss!Forgive me(伸手拿回)T: (缩手)I’ll keep it for you until w e reach the westE: But……T: Emitofo,nothing is lust,lust is nothing! Map?E: (递)Here.Em…… we have arrived in White Tiger Mountain!Ah I can’t walk on any more!(坐)My stomach doesn’t allow So.S: Fat Pig!E: Monkey,if you dare to say these two words once ag ain,I will ,I will………. S: You will what(凶相)?E: (软禁)I will help you catch fleas(跳蚤).S: Hm!T:（轻咳）Wukong,factually,I am a bit hungry Could you go to get me some food?E: You see , boss is hungry,too!T: Baijie!Don’t forget who ate my last meal!J: But bos s,if a monster comes while brother monkey is away…..T: Em…….It is a problem.Wukong,do you have any idea?S: No problem!(安装)（B已躲在一旁偷看）J: This is…..?S: Electric net!I have learnt the energy of electricity from boss’s books. So I made this. No monster can approach you if you stay in it!T: Em……Wukong, you are becoming more and more scientific! Emitofo, knowledge is power!S: Bye!(走)T: Let’s play cards!(三人开始打牌)音乐《斗地主》B: Hm!Hm!Electric net?You are too childish.(变成B1)B1: (接近三人，望着)Can I join you?J: I’m sorr y,lady. We are playing Fighting Against landowner and three people are enough.作抽泣状B1:Do you remember the girl who live in DaMing lake?My dear,xiaozangzang,it’s me 撕心肺裂T：Oh,I just meet lady xia,and get her phone number.Maybe you’re not beautiful enough.SHIFT,i was the failer again.B1:MY GOD.My heart is broken ,and you are so cruel！But i just like it.so men.T:heihei,猥琐的笑同时PPT放唐僧唱歌的样子“我伤害了你，我一笑而过。
孔雀东南飞英文版[修改版]
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第一篇：孔雀东南飞英文版Wander severy five miles焦仲卿Johnny(J for short)刘兰芝Lunch(L for short)焦母Johnny’smother(JM for short)刘母Lunch’smother(LM for short)太守之子Mayor’s son(MS for short)强盗Burglars(A BandC)Prologue(J作被打状跑上台,内砸出一卷纸筒,J被打中,狼狈不堪)J:Every body says that I’m henpecked,but in fact,I’m as strong as a tiger,(小声)while my wife is Wu Song.(指着上台处的门大声道)I’m not afraid of you!(内砸出一脸盆,Ｊ接住当成盾牌护着头)Then,I’m afraid of whom?My wife Lunch is the most famous woman in the neighbor-hood.She is braver than me, smarter than me and stronger than me. All this I do not care.I only want her to be tender than me.But she is not! Having a wife like this is just like living in the hell!(内又砸出一卷纸筒,击中J)My God!Who can help me?(下)Act1(序幕结束时,JM作窃听状)JM(拄拐棍上):I can!(对门内)Lunch! Lunch! Where are you?L(扎着围裙,拿着锅铲,从门内跳出来):I’m here! What’s up mum?JM:I’ve told you again and again that you should call me“my most beautiful graceful and dearest mother-in-law”.L:OK. My most beautiful graceful and dearest mother-in-law,what’s up?JM:Since you married my son you have behaved so badly. You have been so rude,so brusque, solazy……L:But……JM:Never interrupt me!L:Never interrupt me!Since I married your son, that terrible Johnny,I have been working hard allday long,cooking and washing. Ihave raised ten soft housands of pigs and ducks and chickenand……JM:But all those you have done are not as valuable as a grandson!L(生气地挥动着锅铲):Oh,you want a grandson,don’tyou?(开始解围裙)Go and ask your son. I’m leaving!(扯下围裙,扔在JM的脸上,下)Act2(LM坐在台上打毛线,L拿着锅铲上)L:Mum, I’m back!LM:You are back?Why?What happened?L:I was kicked out by my most beautiful graceful and dearest mother–in-law.LM(惊讶,但随即露出幸灾乐祸的神情):See! I have already told you!When you insisted on marrying that terrible Johnny, I told you that he is ugly stupid and poor, but you did not listento me. Look at yourself……L:But,mum……LM:Never interrupt me!L:Mum,I’m not interrupting you.I just want to tell you that you are always right, OK?And I’ll marry whomever you want me to.LM(大喜):Nice girl!Just now,I met the mayor’s son in the market. He said:“If your daughter Haven’t been married, I really really want to marry her!”Now you are free again, I’llgo and tell him.(下)L(惊愕):What?The mayor’s son?The most famous playboy in the neighbor-hood?(手中的锅铲掉在地上)What a silly thing I have done!(下)Act3(J睡眼惺忪上)J(边走边道):Lunch!Lunch!Where are my socks?(走了几步,在地上捡起袜子)Here they are!(闻一下) Er! Hows melly!They are still dirty! (突然想起)Lunch has gone!I have to wash them myself.(他的肚子似乎咕咕叫了起来)Oh,I’m so hungry!But there’s no breakfast!(捡起地上的围裙)This is what Lunch always wears!I miss her so much,and her excellent cooking skill!Nowshe has gone.I have to cook for my mother and myself.JM(上):Where’s my breakfast? Where’s Lunch?Hasn’t she got up yet?J:Mum,can’t you remember?Lunch has gone!JM(沉吟片刻):Well,to tell you the truth Johnny,a son without a wife is useless.Lunch is a nicegirl,go and take her back!J(立正敬礼):Yes madam!Act4(J开心地走着，忽然跳出来三个强盗)A:Hey you!Stop and listen to us!The road is built by me!(抬脚重重地踩在一块大石头上)B:And I planted one tree!(亦抬脚踩在同一块石头上)C:If you want to go by this street---(欲踩石头，但踩到了A的脚)AB&C:Give us all your money!J(搜遍了每一个口袋，掏出１角硬币):Is1mao enough?(三强盗晕倒状，接着三人聚在一边商量)A:What bad luck!This guy is broken!B:If we cannot rob any money today, we will have nothing to eat tonight!C:I heard that the mayor’s son is going to marry Miss Liu Lanzhi next month.WE can go androb the wedding!A&B:Good idea!J(惊讶):What?What?Lunch is going to get married? It’s impossible!AB&C:Why? A pretty girl and a rich man, what a good couple!J:But Lunch is my wife!We haven’t got divorced yet!(突然有了主意)I’ve got an idea!You are going to rob the wedding,don’t you?I’ll gowith you.You take the money and I take the bride.B:Have you got any experience?J:No.But I’ve got this!(J脱下鞋子从里面摸出一张支票，上书＄１，０００，０００) Act5(转眼已到了婚礼之期．MS意气风发用红绸牵着新娘上，J盖着红盖头极不情愿地被拉上台) (J和三强盗跃至台中)ABC&J:Hey you! Stop and listen to us!A:The road is built by me!B:And I planted one tree.C:If you want to go by this street---J:Give us all your money!(L听到J的声音，掀起了盖头)L(惊喜万分):Johnny!(不顾一切地飞奔到J的身边并躲到了的身后)(MS大怒，挥拳向J打来．J矮身一躲，MS打中了J身后的L，L晕倒)J(火冒三丈):How dare you beat my wife!（挥拳向MS冲去）(J与MS混战，JM上，以拐杖击晕MS)(J将MS胸前的新郎标志扯下戴在自己胸前)J(扶起L，关切地问):Honey,how are you?L(哭状):I hurt a lot!J:Don’t cry baby.I’ll go and fetch the medicine. (下)L(起身去追):Wait for me! (跑下)(音乐起Can You Celebrate)第二篇：孔雀东南飞《孔雀东南飞》我深信，广泛阅读的终极目的是为了成为更好的观点接受者，然后成为更优秀的思考者。
最新-《孔雀东南飞》英语剧本,搞笑版的孔雀东南飞故事 精品
《孔雀东南飞》英语剧本,搞笑版的孔雀东南飞故事。
篇一：孔雀东南飞搞笑剧本剧本《孔雀东南飞》剧本旁白：东汉末建安年间，庐江太守衙门里的小官吏焦仲卿的妻子刘兰芝被焦仲卿的母亲赶回娘家，她回娘家后发誓不再嫁人。
她的娘家逼迫她改嫁，她便投水死了。
焦仲卿听到兰芝投水而死这件事，也在自家庭院的树上吊死了。
当时的人哀悼他们写下这首诗记述这件事。
；【孔雀鸟向东南方向飞去，飞上五里便徘徊一阵】刘兰芝大家好!我就是传说中美貌与智慧并重、温柔与体贴的化身----刘兰芝我十三能织布,十四学裁衣,十五弹箜篌,十六诵诗书……焦母(拄拐上场,吼道)你死哪去了!还不赶紧去做饭!兰芝(低眉顺眼并给婆婆行礼)婆婆……我这就去给您做饭?今天咱们吃面条,行么?焦母(面朝天,生气状)面条……面条,太滑!兰芝(委曲求全)那……那……咱们吃包子?焦母(顿了顿拐)包子！！！包子,太腻!兰芝(声音哽咽)那……吃饼成不?焦母(白了兰芝一眼)不行!不行!烙饼太硬!兰芝(泪水溢满眼眶,强忍不流)那婆婆,你想吃什么,我去给您做。
焦母(怒斥)算了吧！你这个笨婆娘！我们焦家怎么娶了你？连饭都做不好！下去吧！算了，快下去……真烦死人了！（兰芝黯然转身，坐在椅子上哭，焦母下场，兰芝转身坐在椅子上哭，仲卿上）仲卿：（远行刚回家，看见兰芝在哭，急忙放下行李作揖到她面前安慰道）娘子，你这是怎么了？（急切）兰芝相公几日不见，你又消瘦了！仲卿：娘子更堪憔悴，母亲又说你来吧！娘子受苦了！兰芝(兰芝低头沉默接着说)只怕……只怕……母亲是不会留我了!仲卿：娘子莫担心,我不会让你离开我的!待我再向母亲求情!(焦下)(仲卿一边走一边犹豫,经过一番思考,他终于来到母亲的房门,焦母正襟危坐于前焦上前去一鞠躬)仲卿：母亲啊!你看兰芝她温柔体贴,对您恭敬孝顺,你为什么总是不满意呢?焦母乖儿子,听话?那种女人不要也罢!娘再给你找一个好媳妇。
喏……东家有个芙蓉姐姐，名叫秦罗敷娘看她是人见人爱，花见花开，车见车爆胎，她和你啊，真是龙配龙，凤配凤，老鼠配臭虫！仲卿：啊！焦母青蛙配恐龙！仲卿：啊！焦母奥……不对!美女配英雄!仲卿：不,孩儿已和兰芝立下山盟海誓、相伴终生,我是风儿,她是沙,我是叶儿她是花,我是……焦母够了,你放了肆了,大了胆了,有能耐了是不是,我的话也不听,说不行!就不行!你们俩立马断交,立刻!马上!(焦抱着头,仲卿被母亲赶了出来,满脸沮丧的来到兰芝屋里)仲卿：(深情的)娘子兰芝相公无须多言,小女子什么都明白了。
《孔雀东南飞》英语剧本,搞笑版的孔雀东南飞故事。
《孔雀东南飞》英语剧本,搞笑版的孔雀东南飞故事。
篇一：孔雀东南飞搞笑剧本剧本《孔雀东南飞》剧本旁白：东汉末建安年间，庐江太守衙门里的小官吏焦仲卿的妻子刘兰芝被焦仲卿的母亲赶回娘家，她回娘家后发誓不再嫁人。
她的娘家逼迫她改嫁，她便投水死了。
焦仲卿听到兰芝投水而死这件事，也在自家庭院的树上吊死了。
当时的人哀悼他们.写下这首记述这件事。
；【孔雀鸟向东南方向飞去，飞上五里便徘徊一阵】刘兰芝: 大家好!我就是传说中美貌与智慧并重、温柔与体贴的化身----刘兰芝我十三能织布,十四学裁衣,十五弹箜篌,十六诵诗书…… 焦母: (拄拐上场,吼道)你死哪去了!还不赶紧去做饭! 兰芝: (低眉顺眼并给婆婆行礼)婆婆……我这就去给您做饭?今天咱们吃面条,行么? 焦母: (面朝天,生气状)面条……面条,太滑! 兰芝: (委曲求全)那……那……咱们吃包子? 焦母: (顿了顿拐)包子！！！包子,太腻! 兰芝: (声音哽咽)那……吃饼成不? 焦母: (白了兰芝一眼)不行!不行!烙饼太硬! 兰芝: (泪水溢满眼眶,强忍不流)那婆婆,你想吃什么,我去给您做。
焦母: (怒斥)算了吧！你这个笨婆娘！我们焦家怎么娶了你？连饭都做不好！下去吧！算了，快下去……真烦死人了！（兰芝黯然转身，坐在椅子上哭，焦母下场，兰芝转身坐在椅子上哭，仲卿上）仲卿：（远行刚回家，看见兰芝在哭，急忙放下行李作揖到她面前安慰道）娘子，你这是怎么了？（急切）兰芝: 相公几日不见，你又消瘦了！仲卿：娘子更堪憔悴，母亲又说你来吧！娘子受苦了！兰芝: (兰芝低头沉默接着说)只怕……只怕……母亲是不会留我了! 仲卿：娘子莫担心,我不会让你离开我的!待我再向母亲求情!(焦下) (仲卿一边走一边犹豫,经过一番思考,他终于来到母亲的房门,焦母正襟危坐于前焦上前去一鞠躬) 仲卿：母亲啊!你看兰芝她温柔体贴,对您恭敬孝顺,你为什么总是不满意呢? 焦母: 乖儿子,听话?那种女人不要也罢!娘再给你找一个好媳妇。
最新-孔雀东南飞台词(搞笑版) 精品
孔雀东南飞台词(搞笑版)篇一：《孔雀东南飞》(英文搞笑话剧)《孔雀东南飞》（英文搞笑话剧）焦仲卿()刘兰芝()焦母’()刘母’()太守之子’()强盗()(作被打状跑上台,内砸出一卷纸筒,被打中,狼狈不堪)’,,’,(小声)(指着上台处的门大声道)’!(内砸出一脸盆,Ｊ接住当成盾牌护着头),’?-,!!(内又砸出一卷纸筒,击中)!?(下)1(序幕结束时,作窃听状)(拄拐棍上)!(对门内)!!?(扎着围裙,拿着锅铲,从门内跳出来)’!’?’“--”--,’?,,…………!!,,,……!(生气地挥动着锅铲),,’?(开始解围裙)’!(扯下围裙,扔在的脸上,下)2(坐在台上打毛线,拿着锅铲上),’!???–-(惊讶,但随即露出幸灾乐祸的神情)!!,,……,……!,’?’(大喜)!,’“’,!”,’(下)(惊愕)?’?-?(手中的锅铲掉在地上)!(下)3(睡眼惺忪上)(边走边道)!!?(走了几步,在地上捡起袜子)!(闻一下)!!!(突然想起)!(他的肚子似乎咕咕叫了起来),’!’!(捡起地上的围裙)!,!(上)’?’?’?,’?!(沉吟片刻),,,!(立正敬礼)!4(开心地走着，忽然跳出来三个强盗)!!!(抬脚重重地踩在一块大石头上)!(亦抬脚踩在同一块石头上)---(欲踩石头，但踩到了的脚)&!(搜遍了每一个口袋，掏出１角硬币)1?(三强盗晕倒状，接着三人聚在一边商量)!!,!’!&!(惊讶)???’!&?,!!’!(突然有了主意)’!,’?’?’!(脱下鞋子从里面摸出一张支票，上书＄１，０００，０００)5(转眼已到了婚礼之期．意气风发用红绸牵着新娘上，盖着红盖头极不情愿地被拉上台)(和三强盗跃至台中)&!!!---!(听到的声音，掀起了盖头)(惊喜万分)!(不顾一切地飞奔到的身边并躲到了的身后)(大怒，挥拳向打来．矮身一躲，打中了身后的，晕倒)(火冒三丈)!（挥拳向冲去）(与混战，上，以拐杖击晕)(将胸前的新郎标志扯下戴在自己胸前)(扶起，关切地问),?(哭状)!’’(下)(起身去追)!(跑下)(音乐起)篇二：孔雀东南飞完整话剧剧本剧中人物列表：刘兰芝(刘超)庐江小吏焦仲卿之妻，一个孝顺而又知书答礼的女子。
英语口语小短剧剧本
英语口语小短剧剧本英语口语小短剧剧本：Three Times’ Beating Monster人物：T唐僧 S：孙悟空 E：猪八戒 J：沙僧B：白骨精 B1：B变成的村姑 B2：B变成的太婆B3：B变化成的老头 N：哪吒唐僧: Emitofo,do you know where we are nowS: Bajie,map!E: (摸出，递给S)S: Look,master (凑近T) （T、S一齐转向E）T: Bajie!How Many times I have told you, not to bring these girls’s beatiful picture with you!E: Oh,master!Five me(伸手拿回)T: (缩手)I’ll keep it for you until we reach the westE: But……T: Emitofo,,lust is nothing! nothing is lust! MapE: (递)Here.Em we have arrived in White Tiger Mountain!Ah I can’t walk on any more!(坐)I am straving····S: Fat Pig!E: Monkey,if you dare to say these o words once again,I will ,I will……….S: You will what(凶相)E: (软下来示好)I will help you catch fleas(跳蚤).S: Hm!（点头摸摸猪八戒的头）T:（轻咳）Wukong, actually,I am a bit hungry Could you go to get me some foodE: You see ,master is hungry,too!T: Baijie!Don’t fet who ate my last meal several hours ago!J: But master,if a monster es while monkeg is away…..T: Em…….It is a problem.Wukong,do you have any ideaS: No problem!(安装)（B已躲在一旁偷看）E: This is…..S: Electric !I have learnt the energy of electricity from master’s books. So I made this. No monste r can approach you if you stay in it!T: Em……Wukong, you are being more and more scientific! Emitofo, knowledge is power!S: Bye!(走)T: Let’s play cards!(三人开始打牌)音乐《斗地主》B: Hm!Hm!Electric You are too childish.(变成B1)B1: (接近三人，望着)Can I join youT: I’m sorry,lady. We are playing Fighting Against Landlord and three people are enough.B1: (在一旁观看)Oh,Chance! Bomb!T: Bomb (打出)B1: Double King!T: Oh .I win! Em ,Lady,you are a master-hand. Come in and teach me!(准备开电网门)S: (回来，看见B1)Oh,monster!(上前就打)B1: （倒)AhT: (气愤)Wukong! Look what have done! She is my teacher!S: She is a monster!T: Nonsense!(深呼吸)S: Oh,please don’t……T:It’s too late!(唱)Once more you open the door (泰坦尼克主题曲，走音离谱)S: Please,Please,oh,no (痛苦抱头)T: (呛住，咳)Wukong,I’m disappointed with you!B: (真身出现)Hm!Sun Wukong, I’ll teach you a lesson!(变成太婆)B2:Hello,have you seen my daughterT: Daughter ...(连忙挡住地尸体)No,sorry!(陪笑，B2想看后面是什么，T挡)S: （咬牙切齿）You monster, I’ll beat you into hell!(S追打B2,B2躲至T身后，S打，不想打到T头，T晕，S再打死B2)E&J: Are you Ok, master (扶T)J: Look,(伸食指)how manyT:Two ..(晕乎乎地)Sun Wukong, game over!(变成B3)B3: (看到B1,B2尸体)Oh .,my daughter, my wife! Who did it !!(哭喊)S: I’ll kill you, monster!(打)T: （想阻止，未及）You,you.....(险些晕，E,J扶住)You have killed three lives!S: No,they are not human beings!They are created by monster!T: Monster You are a real monster!Never let me see you,go!!S: (悲，离去)（音乐，营造“假”悲伤气氛）《人鬼情未了》E: Master, brother Monkey is.......T: Scratch! Don't mention that guy any more!B: (出现) Ha,ha,ha!(三尸体B1,B2,B3在B招手后“飘”走)T: （惊）You are......B: How foolish you are ,Mr Tang!(E,J去阻斗，被击退)B: (抓住T)I'll enjoy your meat and blood,ha,ha......S: (悄悄走到B后，打B,B晕)A thousand years later.T: WukongE: Oh,Brother Monkey!J: Our hero is back!T: I,I can't understand......What happenedS: Master,your IQ needs increasing! This monster changed its appearance into three shapes in order to cheat you!T: How,how did you find outS: (沉默).......Monkey's intuition(直觉)N: Excuse me, where is the iminalS; Ah......you are too late ,Nezha!(对T)I've called the police.N: (摇醒B)You are under arrest .(出示证件)You have the right to remain silent If you give up the right, anything you will say can and will be against you in a court of law!(带走B)T: Wukong(S不理T)I admit my mistake this time(S仍不理)I'm sorry(小声)S: WhatT: I'm sorry.S: Em Louder,pleaseT: I......am......sorry.....(S 捂耳)（音乐响）《敢问路在何方》（这个放伴奏）T: Let's go guys!( 歌)S: You are carrying the luggage, I am leading the horse.E: Say goodbye to the sun, Wele evening glow.J: Sleeping on the ground, again we set out set out, again we set out.T.S.E.J: Ah......Ah...... Sleeping on the ground again we set out.T: One after the other the seasons go by,and ohe after the other, the year go on. You wonder where the road is. The road is under your feet.T.S.E.J: You uonder where the road is, the road is under your feet......整理：zhl201611。
英语搞笑话剧剧本(四人)
甲:Hello,every one, have you ever seen the movie<Avatar>? Yeah, you are right, I'm the director-- Cameron Diaz, applaud , thank you....Recently, I will direct a new movie called < Avatar 2 >, today, there will be a audition and I will select three actresses who can get the chance to perform in this film with famousactress---Anne Hathaway,OK, let's begin. At first , talent show, number one, let's welcome.乙:(风情万种,妖娆妩媚地走进来,给观众一个飞吻):oh,honey,dear,sweet,darling director, the most beautiful charming, sexy girl is coming , every body knows me, right? Yeah, I'm Nicole Kidman, open your eyes as big as you can and hold your breath, there will be a unique, fantastic dance show for you, I believe that all of you will be crazy about it ,(打个响指) come some music.(搞笑舞,自由发挥). (跳完,鞠躬,向观众谢幕), thank you,(面向导演), honey, is it a wonderful performance?甲:(作目瞪口呆状),乙:(在甲眼前晃手),oh, darling, are you Ok?甲:eh...my god, have you use some stimulant drugs this morning, you make my nerves nervous. Get out , next one.乙:oh no ...sweet ,you break my heart...(掩面离去)丙:oh it seems to be serious. God bless me(画个十字架,镇定地走到甲面前,伸出手), nice to meet you, director.甲:(与之握手),nice to meet you too,so, introduce yourself please. 丙:I'm Celine Dion, you know, I don't have too many achievements, I just won five Grammy awards, 12 World Music Awards, 7 American Music Awards , 21 Juno Awards and(做沉思状) oh, I forget it , a Oscar Award, (同学鼓掌,乙作安抚状),oh, calm down, calm down,it's just a piece of cake for me ,you know, I....甲:ok ,stop, time is limited, just begin丙:OK!!! I'll use my first signature song to conquer you --my heart will go on, just enjoy it.near, far, wherever you arei believe that the heart does go ononce more, you opened the door(甲stop stop,丙不理,继续作深情状) and you're here in my heart,and my heart will go on and on.甲:guard ,guard, help, drag this mad woman out.Oh, I'm dying, hope the next one will give me a surprise（丁上场）甲(做厌恶状):oh, it's really a big surprise. What an ugly woman! (Ofcourse, I won’t let you pass.) Why do you come here?丁: Distinguished director, please give me a chance. I walked 25000km for a year just to compete in this interview. Please give me a chance, please.甲( ):OK, so what’s your name?丁: my name is Gaga Su.甲(上下打量)：EN…ok ok, I’ll give you only 30s. OK?丁:OK, that’s enough. Thank you, thank you.I’ll just present a poem I love best. The Furthest Distance in The World.The furthest distance in the world世界上最遥远的距离Is not between life and death不是生与死But when I stand in front of you而是我就站在你面前Yet you don't know that I love you你却不知道我爱你The furthest distance in the world世界上最遥远的距离Is not when I stand in front of you不是我就站在你面前Sir, time is out.甲：Oh, no no no, just go on.Yet you can't see my love你却不知道我爱你But when undoubtedly knowing the love from both 而是明明知道彼此相爱Yet cannot be together却不能在一起The furthest distance in the world世界上最遥远的距离Is not being apart while being in love不是明明知道彼此相爱却不能在一起But when painly cannot resist the yearning而是明明无法抵挡这股思念Yet pretending you have never been in my heart 却还得故意装作丝毫没有把你放在心里That’s all, thank you.（另外两人跑进来,乙妩媚状）乙：Honey, you like my dance, right?丙镇静状: Director, you like my singing, right?丁深情状: Princess, do you like my poem?甲(沉迷状):。
英语话剧《孔雀东南飞》中文翻译翻译
孔雀东南飞英语话剧翻译--------------10级生物制药班角色：焦仲卿刘兰芝焦母刘母太守之子强盗(甲、乙和丙)第一幕仲卿：大家都说我怕老婆，但事实上，我像老虎一样强壮，（小声）我的妻子就是武松。
（指着上台处的门大声道）我不怕你！（内砸出一脸盆，仲卿接住，当成盾牌护着头）然后，我怕谁？我的妻子是最有名的女子在邻里间。
她比我勇敢，比我聪明，比我强。
这些我都不在乎。
我只想她能比我温柔点。
但她不是！有这样的妻子就像活在地狱中！（内又砸出一卷纸筒，击中仲卿）天哪！谁能帮帮我啊？（下）（焦母作窃听状）焦母（拄拐棍上）：我可以！（对门内）兰芝！兰芝！你在哪儿啊？兰芝（扎着围裙，拿着锅铲，从门内跳出来）：我在这里！婆婆怎么啦？焦母：我一再告诉你，你应该叫我“我最美丽优雅的婆婆”。
兰芝：好的。
我最美丽的优雅和亲爱的婆婆，怎么啦？焦母：自从你与我儿子结婚以来，你就很糟糕。
你太不礼貌了，那么粗暴，那么懒......兰芝：但......焦母：不要打断我！兰芝：不要打断我！自从我嫁给你的儿子，那可怕的仲卿，我整天努力的干活，洗衣做饭。
我养了数以万计的猪、鸡鸭和...... 焦母：但你所做的都不如一个宝贵的孙子！兰芝（生气地挥动着锅铲）：哦，你想有一个孙子，对不对？（开始解围裙）好，要你儿子吧。
我走！（扯下围裙，扔在焦母的脸上，下）第二幕（刘母坐在台上打毛线，兰芝拿着锅铲上）兰芝：母亲，我回来了！刘母：你回来了？为什么呢？出什么事了？兰芝：我被我最美丽的优雅和最亲爱的婆婆赶出来了。
刘母（惊讶，但随即露出幸灾乐祸的神情）：看！我早已告诉你！当初你坚持要嫁给那个可怕的家伙，我告诉你，他是丑陋的，愚蠢和贫穷，但你没有听我的。
看看你自己......兰芝：但是，母亲......刘母：不要打断我！兰芝：母亲，我没打断你了。
我只想告诉你，难道你永远是对的吗？那你想要我嫁给谁。
刘母（大喜）：好女儿！刚刚，我在集市遇见了太守的儿子。
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9到10人英语剧本---孔雀东南飞现代搞笑版英文9到10人英语剧本 ---孔雀东南飞现代搞笑版英文2011-05-03 17:47Performance @ College : Story of Johnny and Lunch (孔雀东南飞现代搞笑版)Characters:Prologue(J作被打状跑上台，内砸出一个纸筒，J被打中，狼狈不堪)J: Everybody says that I'm henpecked, but in fact, I'm as strong as a tiger. (Whisper)While my wife is Wu Song. (拍门大叫)I'm not afraid of you! （内砸出一脸盆，J接着当成盾牌护着）Then,I'm afraid of whom? Mywife lunch is the most famous woman in neighbourhood. She's braver than me,smarter than me and stronger than me.All of this I do not care. I just want her to be tender than me. But she isn't! Having a wife like this is just like living in the hell!Act One(序幕结束时，JM作窃听状)JM:(拄着拐棍上)I can! (对门内)Lunch! Lunch! Where are you?L：（揸住锅铲，扎着围裙，从门内跳出来）I'm here!I'm cutting chicken.What's up mum?JM: I've told you again and again that you should call me "my most beautiful, graceful and dearest mother-in-law".L: Ok. My most beautiful, graceful and dearest mother-in-law, what's up?JM:Since you married my son you have behaved so badly, been so rude, so brusque, so lazy...L: But...JM:Never interrupt me!L: Never interrupt me! Since I married your son, that terrible Johnny, I have been working hard all day, cooking and washing. I have raised tens of thousands of pigs and ducks and chickens and...JM: But all those you have done are not as valuable as a grandson!L:(生气挥动锅铲)Oh, you want a grandson, don't you?(开始脱围裙) Goand ask your son. I'm leaving!(扔下围裙，扔到JM脸上，下台)Act Two(LM坐在台上打毛线，L拿着锅铲上台)L: Mum, I'm back.LM: You're back? Why? What happened?L: I was kicked out by my most beautiful, graceful and dearestmother-in-law.LM(惊讶，但随即露出幸灾乐祸的神情):See! I have already told you! Whenyou insisted on marrying that terrible Johnny, I told you that he is ugly, stupid and poor. But you didn't listen to me. Look at yourself now!L: But, mum...LM: Never interrupt me!L: Mum, I'm not interrupting you. I just want to tell you that youare always right, OK? And I'll marry whomever you want me to.LM: (大喜)Nice girl! Just now, I met the Mayor's Son in the market.He said,"If your daughter haven't been married, I really really wantto marry her!" Now that you're free again, I'll go and tell him (下台).L: (惊愣)What? The Mayor's Son? The most famous play boy in neightbourhood? (手中锅铲掉地上)What a silly thing I have done!(下台)Act Three(J 睡眼惺忪上台)J: (边走边道)Lunch! Lunch! Where are my socks? (走几步，在地上捡起袜子) Here they are! (闻一下) ER...How smelly! They're still dirty! (突然想起) Lunch has gone! I have to wash them myself! （肚子似乎咕咕叫了起来）Oh, I'm so hungry, but there is no breakfast! (捡起地上的围裙)This is Lunch's apron(围裙)! I miss her...EXCELLENT cooking skill so much! Now that she has gone, I have to cook for my mother and myself. JM:(上台) Where's my breakfast? Where is Lunch? Hasn't she got up yet? J：Mum, can't you remember? Lunch has gone!JM: (沉吟片刻) Well, to tell you the truth, Johnny, a son without awife is useless. Lunch is a nice girl. Go and take her back.J: (立正敬礼)YES, MADAM!ACT FORE(J 开心地走着，忽然跳出三强盗)A: Hey you! Stop and listen to me. The road is built by me!(一脚踩在一石头上)B: And I planted one tree!(踩同一石头)C: If you want to go by this street...(欲踩石头，但踩到A的脚)B：Give us...A: AllC: your money!J: （搜遍每一口袋，掏出一1角硬币）Is 1 mao enough?(ABC晕倒状，接着三人聚在一边商量)A: What a bad luck! This guy is broken!B: If we can't rob any money today, we'll have nothing to eat tonight. C: I heard that the Mayor's Son is going to marry Miss Lunch next month, we can go and rob the wedding!AB: Good idea!J:(惊讶)What? What? Lunch is going to get married? Impossible!A:Why?B: A pretty girl and a rich man.C: What a good couple!J: But Lunch is my wife, we haven't got divorced yet.(突然有主意)I've got an idea! You are going to rob the wedding, aren't you? I'll go with you. you take the money, and I take the bride.B: Have you got any experience?J: No, but I've got this!(J 脱下鞋子，从里面抹出一张支票，上书：$1,000,000,ABC见状跟着J下台，目光跟着钱)Act Five(转眼已到婚礼之期，MS意气风发用红绸牵着新娘上台，L盖着红盖头极不情愿的被拉上台)（J A B C 跃至台中）A: Hey you!BCJ: Stop and listen to us!A: The road is built by me.B: And I planted one tree!C: If you want to go by this street...J: Give us all your money!(L 听到J 的声音，掀起了盖头)L: （惊喜万分）Johnny! (不顾一切地飞奔到J 的身后)（MS大怒，挥拳向J 打来，J 矮身一躲，MS 打中J 身后的L , L晕倒）J: (火冒三丈) How dare you beat my wife! (挥拳打向MS)(J与 MS混战，JM悄悄上在MS后)J: (指着MS后向MS讲)Hey, Pretty girl!(MS向后一望，JM用拐杖将其打倒)（J 将MS胸前的新郎标志撤下来，戴在自己的胸前）J: (扶起L,关切地问)Honey, How are you?L:(Crying...) Thurtalot!J: Don't cry baby, I'll fetch some medicine for you (下台)L:(起身去追)Wait for me!(跑下台) （音乐起：罗密欧与祝英台）END...。