英语幽默小故事合集7篇
英语幽默小故事合集7篇
若是你在学习英语的过程中感到很枯燥，不妨来读一些英语幽默小故事放松放松。英语幽默故事简短，内容诙谐幽默，情节生动有趣，相信在你在阅读的同时也可以一起学习英语哦。下面小编给大家介绍关于英语幽默小故事，方便大家学习。
英语幽默小故事1
My husband，Michael，a bus driver，was passing a
deserted bus stop when one of his passengers called out that a
woman wanted to get on. He pulled up to the curb and opened
the doors.
我丈夫，麦克是个开大巴士的。一次当他刚要开过一个无人上下车的车站时，一位乘客喊过有位老妇人要上车。麦克把车停靠在马路边，打开了车门。
After a minute，Michael saw an elderly woman with a cane
crossing the street slowly.
过了足有一分钟，麦克才见到一位老太太拄着拐杖，慢腾腾地过着马路朝车子走来。
He waited patiently as she made her way to the bus and
climbed the steps.
麦克衬心地等她来到汽车旁上着台阶。While she was looking in
her purse for her bus pass，he began to close the doors.”Wait a
minute!”she snapped."My mother's coming.”
趁老太太打开钱包找月票的工夫，麦克欲关门，老妇人阻止道:“等一会，我妈妈还在后面呢!”
英语幽默小故事2
Bernie was invited to his friend's home for dinner. Morris, the
host, preceded every request to his wife by endearing terms,
calling her Honey, My Love, Darling, Sweetheart, etc. Bernie
looked at Morris and remarked, "That is really nice, that after all these years that you have been married, and you keep calling
your wife those pet names." Morris hung his head and
whispered," To tell the truth, I forgot her name three years ago."
Bernie应邀来到他的朋友Morris家吃晚餐。在朋友家，Bernie发现，不管问他老婆什么问题，Morris总要在每句话的前面加上一些亲密的称呼，象蜜糖，我的爱人，亲爱的，甜心等等。Bernie对Morris说，“你们夫妻俩真够亲密的，结婚这么多年了，你还叫她叫得那么亲密。”Morris低下头，小声地对Bernie说，“老实跟你说吧，三年前我忘记老婆的真名是什么了。”
英语幽默小故事3
Two guys were walking through the jungle. All of a sudden,
a tiger appears from a distance, running towards them. One of
the guys takes out a pair of "Nikes" from his bag and starts to put
them on. The other guy with a surprised look and exclaims, "Do
you think you will run faster than the tiger with those?" His friend
replies: "I don't have to out run it, I just have to run faster than
you."
两个男人正在穿过丛林，突然，一只老虎出现在远处，向他们冲来。 其中的一个人从包里拿出一双“耐克”鞋，开始穿上。另一个人惊奇地看着他说，“你以为穿上这个就可以跑得过老虎吗?” 他的朋友回答道：“我不用跑得过它，我只要跑得比你快就行了。”
英语幽默小故事4
A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two
new dogs, and asked her what their names were.
一个女孩去拜访她的金发朋友，这个朋友最近养了两只“狗”，于是女孩问道：“它们叫什么名字呀?”
The blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex
and one was named Timex.
金发朋友说，一只叫Rolex，另一只叫Timex。
Her friend said, "Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?
女孩说：“哪有狗狗叫这个名字的。”
"HELLLOOOOOOO..." answered the blonde. "They're watch
dogs!"
“那个……”金发朋友说。“他们是监视器!”
英语幽默小故事5
Too Much Pressure
For a couple years I’ve been blaming it on lack of sleep and
too much pressure from my job，but now I found out the real
reason：I’m tired because I’m overworked.The population of
this country is 237 million.104 million are retired.That leaves 133
million to do the work.There are 85 million in school，which
leaves 48 million to do the work.Of this there are 29 million
employed by the federal government，leaving 19 million to do
the work.2.8 million are in the Armed Forces，which leaves 16.2
million to do the work.Take from the total the 14.8 million people
who work for State and City Governments and that leaves 1.4
million to do the work.At any given time there are 188，000
people in hospitals，leaving 1，212，000 to do the work.Now，there are 1，211，998 people in prisons.That leaves just two
people to do the work.You and me.And you’re sitting at the
table reading jokes.
压力太大
多年以来我一直感到很疲惫，我曾经把原因归咎为缺乏睡眠以及来自于工作上的巨大压力。但是，我现在找到了真正的原因：我感到疲倦是因为我超负荷工作。我们这个国家有2.37亿人口。其中1.04亿已经退休了。还剩下1.33亿在工作。有8，500万人还在上学，工作的就剩下4，800万。这其中还有2，900万联邦政府雇员，真正做事的就剩1，900万人，又有280万人在服兵役，就剩下1，620万人在工作。从中再去掉各州和市政府的雇员1，480万人，还剩下140万人工作。但又有18.8万人生病住院，现在只剩下121.2万人工作。其中1，211，998人在坐牢。这样仅剩下两个人在工作，就是你和我。而你却坐在桌边看笑话。
英语幽默小故事6
Top 9 Reasons to Study Economics
Economists are armed and dangerous: "Watch out for our
invisible hands."
Economists can supply it on demand .
You can talk about money without ever having to make any.
You get to say "trickle down" with a straight face .
Mick Jagger and Arnold Schwarzenegger both studied
economics and look how they turned out .
When you are in the unemployment line, at least you will
know why you are there.
If you rearrange the letters in "ECONOMICS", you get
"COMIC NOSE".
Although ethics teaches that virtue is its own reward , in
economics we get taught that reward is its own virtue.
When you get drunk, you can tell everyone that you are just
researching the law of diminishing marginal utility.
学习经济学的九大理由
经济学家们会武功：“小心我们的无影手。”
经济学家们能够做到有求必应。
你可以不必挣钱而对金钱夸夸其谈。
你可以开始拉着脸说“涓滴”这一术语了。
米克·贾格尔和阿诺德·施瓦辛格两人都学过经济学，看看他们后来都成为了什么样的人物。
站在失业队伍里的时候，至少你会知道自己为什么失业。
假如重新安排“经济学”这个词包含的字母，你得到的是“小丑的鼻子”。
英语幽默小故事10篇(带翻译)
英语幽默小故事10篇(带翻译)
线话英语|2016-03-14 17:03:05
英语幽默小故事10篇(带翻译)如下：
Midway Tactics
Three competing store owners rented adjoining shops in a mall.
Observers waited for mayhem to ensue.
The retailer on the right put up huge signs saying, "Gigantic Sale!"
and "Super Bargains!"
The store on the left raised bigger signs proclaiming, "Prices
Slashed!" and "Fantastic Discounts!" The owner in the middle then prepared a large sign that simply
stated, "ENTRANCE".
中间战术
三个互相争生意的商店老板在一条商业街上租用了毗邻的店铺。旁观者等着瞧好戏。
右边的零售商挂起了巨大的招牌，上书：“大减价!”“特便宜!”
左边的商店挂出了更大的招牌，声称：“大砍价!”“大折扣!”
中间的商人随后准备了一个大招牌，上面只简单地写着：“入口处”。
Very Pleased to Meet You
During World War II, a lot of young women in Britain were in the
army. Joan Phillips was one of them. She worked in a big camp, and of
course met a lot of men, officers and soldiers.
英语幽默小故事10篇
英语幽默小故事10篇
在繁忙的学习工作中，阅读一些幽默笑话是我们放松心情的好方式。下面店铺为大家带来英语幽默小故事共10篇，希望大家喜欢!
Three competing store owners rented adjoining shops in a
mall. Observers waited for mayhem to ensue.
The retailer on the right put up huge signs saying, "Gigantic
Sale!" and "Super Bargains!"
The store on the left raised bigger signs proclaiming, "Prices
Slashed!" and "Fantastic Discounts!"
The owner in the middle then prepared a large sign that
simply stated, "ENTRANCE".
幽默故事翻译：中间战术
三个互相争生意的商店老板在一条商业街上租用了毗邻的店铺。旁观者等着瞧好戏。
右边的零售商挂起了巨大的招牌，上书：“大减价!”“特便宜!”
左边的商店挂出了更大的招牌，声称：“大砍价!”“大折扣!”
中间的商人随后准备了一个大招牌，上面只简单地写着：“入口处”。
During World War II, a lot of young women in Britain were in
the army. Joan Phillips was one of them. She worked in a big
camp, and of course met a lot of men, officers and soldiers.
One evening she met Captain Humphreys at a dance. He said
一分钟英文幽默小故事(共8篇)
第 1 页 共 17 页 一分钟英文幽默小故事〔共8篇〕
篇1：一分钟英文幽默小故事 A hungry Fox found in
a hollow tree a quantity of bread and meat, which some
shepherds had placed there against their return.
Delighted with his find he slipped in through the
narrow aperture and greedily devoured it all.
But when he tried to get out again he found
himself so swollen after his big meal that he could
not squeeze through the hole, and fell to whining and
groaning over his misfortune.
一分钟英文幽默小故事2:The Beauty of a Shabby
Little Dandelion
Spring has e for the flowers and trees, in the
forest and fields. Spring has also e on the wild
flowers under the fence and on a small apple tree.
There were red bursting flower buds hanging on the
fresh apple tree branches.
The apple Tree Branch held up his head and looked
at many kinds of people who came in and out. They all 第 2 页 共 17 页 showed different reactions to the Apple Tree Branch.
幽默英语小故事
幽默英语小故事
幽默简单英语小故事搞笑阅读
幽默简单英语小故事搞笑阅读 幽默简单英语小故事篇1
“Gerald,“ asked the teacher, "what is the shape of the earth" “Gerald，”老师问道，“地球的形状是什么样的” "It"s round," answered Gerald. “是圆的”，Gerald答道。
"How do you know it"s round" continued the teacher. “你怎么知道它是圆的呢”老师继续追问。
"All right, it"s square then," he replied, "I really don"t feel like
getting into an argument about it!" “好吧，那就是方的，”他答道，“我真不想为此和您争论!” 幽默简单英语小故事篇2 There was a farmer
who fell and broke his hip while he was plowing, and his horse
immediately galloped five miles to the nearest town and returned,
carrying a doctor on his back. 有一个农夫在耕地的时候从马背上摔下来，摔坏了他的臀部，于是他 的马立刻疾奔了五里路，驼回了一名医生。
"That"s a pretty smart horse," the farmer"s friend later observed.
“真是一匹聪明的马，”后来农夫的朋友评论道。
"Well, he"s not really so smart," the farmer said. "The doctor he
brought back was a veterinarian!" “哦，他其实并没有这么聪明，”农夫说。“它带回来的医生是一名兽 医!” 幽默简单英语小故事篇3Alan
简单搞笑的英语小故事
第 1 页 共 9 页 简单搞笑的英语小故事
（经典版）
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妙趣幽默英语故事
妙趣幽默英语故事
在日常繁忙的生活中，也不要忘了放松自己的心情。下面是店铺为大家带来妙趣幽默英语故事，希望大家喜欢!
妙趣幽默英语故事：精明的家庭主妇
A smart housewife was told that there was a kind of stove
which would only consume half of the coal she was buming.
一位精明的家庭主妇听说有一种炉子用起来可以比她现在用的炉子省一半的煤。
She was very excited,and said: “That’"be terrific! Since one
stove can save half of the coal, if I buy two, no coal will be
needed."
她听了大为兴奋，说：“太好了!一个炉子可以省一半的煤，那么如果我买两个炉子的话，不就可以把煤全都省下来了吗?”
妙趣幽默英语故事：新员工
Several weeks after a young man had been hired, he was
called into the personnel director's office.
一个年轻人在被雇用几个星期后，被叫到人事经理的办公室。
"What is the meaning of this ? " the director asked. "When
you applied for the job, you told us you had five years'experience.
Now we discover this is the first job you ever held.
“这是什么意思?”经理问，“当你申请这份工作时，你告诉我们有五年工作经验，现在我们发现这其实是你的第一份工作。”
"Well, " the young man said, "in your advertisement you said
英语幽默小故事带翻译
1 英语幽默小故事带翻译
故事一：The Interview（面试）
John went for an interview at a big company. After the interview,
the HR manager said, “You are very suitable for the job. But
I'm afraid you won't be able to start until Monday.”
“No problem,” John said. “I'm just not the type to start a
new job on a Friday anyway!”
翻译：约翰去了一家大公司面试。面试后，人力资源经理说，“你非常适合这份工作。但我担心你直到星期一才能开始。”
“没问题，”约翰说。“反正我也不是星期五开始新工作的人！”
故事二：The English Lesson（英语课）
Tom: Do you love me just because my father left me a fortune?
Ann: Not at all honey, I would love you no matter who left you
the money. 2
翻译：汤姆：你爱我只是因为我父亲留给我一大笔财产吗？
安妮：亲爱的，一点也不，不管是谁留给你钱，我都会爱你。
故事三：The Blind Man（盲人）
A blind man walks into a store with his seeing-eye dog. All of
a sudden, he picks up the leash and begins swinging the dog over
his head.
The manager runs up to the man and asks, “What are you doing?!”
英语幽默小故事10篇 2
英语幽默小故事10篇(带翻译)如下：
Midway Tactics
Three competing store owners rented adjoining shops in a mall. Observers waited for
mayhem to ensue.
The retailer on the right put up huge signs saying, "Gigantic Sale!" and "Super Bargains!"
The store on the left raised bigger signs proclaiming, "Prices Slashed!" and "Fantastic
Discounts!"
The owner in the middle then prepared a large sign that simply stated, "ENTRANCE".
中间战术
三个互相争生意的商店老板在一条商业街上租用了毗邻的店铺。旁观者等着瞧好戏。
右边的零售商挂起了巨大的招牌，上书：“大减价!”“特便宜!”
左边的商店挂出了更大的招牌，声称：“大砍价!”“大折扣!”
中间的商人随后准备了一个大招牌，上面只简单地写着：“入口处”。
Very Pleased to Meet You
During World War II, a lot of young women in Britain were in the army. Joan Phillips was
one of them. She worked in a big camp, and of course met a lot of men, officers and soldiers.
One evening she met Captain Humphreys at a dance. He said to her, "I‘m going abroad
英语幽默小故事10篇 3
英语幽默小故事10篇
摘要：
1.英语幽默小故事概述
2.故事1：聪明的狗
3.故事2：迟到的理由
4.故事3：误解的笑话
5.故事4：幸运的数字
6.故事5：咖啡店的对决
7.故事6：调皮的孙子
8.故事7：语言障碍
9.故事8：购物趣事
10.故事9：意外的礼物
11.故事10：简单的幸福
12.总结：英语幽默小故事的启示
正文：
【英语幽默小故事概述】
在这个世界上，幽默无处不在，英语幽默小故事更是让人忍俊不禁。这里，我们为您精心准备了10篇英语幽默小故事，它们涵盖了日常生活、工作和人际交往等多个方面，不仅让您在轻松愉快的氛围中学习英语，还能领悟到人生哲理。接下来，让我们一一领略这些故事的魅力吧！
【故事1：聪明的狗】 一天，一位主人带着他的狗去散步。突然，狗发现了一个美味的骨头，于是它决定偷偷拿走。主人发现了狗的意图，于是对它说：“如果你能用英语告诉我这个骨头的价值，我就让你拿走。”狗想了想，用英语回答：“This bone is
worth a lot.”主人听后笑了笑，把骨头给了狗。这个故事告诉我们，学习英语是有好处的。
【故事2：迟到的理由】
一个人因为迟到被同事嘲笑，他解释说：“我今天起床后发现家里的钟停了，所以我以为是早上7点。结果，我以最快的速度赶到公司，结果还是迟到了。”这个故事告诉我们，有时候，迟到的理由也能带来幽默。
【故事3：误解的笑话】
一位外国游客在中国餐馆点了一份“狗不理包子”，结果服务员端上来一盘狗肉。游客大怒，喊道：“我点的不是狗肉，是狗不理包子！”这个故事告诉我们，语言误解会导致笑话。
【故事4：幸运的数字】
一位迷信的同事对公司里的每个人都说：“我的车牌号是168，意味着一路发，所以今天我一定会走运。”结果，当天他出了车祸。有人问他：“你的车牌号不是意味着一路发吗？怎么还会出车祸？”他回答：“是啊，可是我忘了，168还意味着一路傻瓜。”
【故事5：咖啡店的对决】
英语幽默小故事集锦
英语幽默小故事集锦
约会
When the young waitress in the café in Tom's
building started waving hello everyday. Tom was
flattered, for she was at least 15 years younger than
he. One day she waved and beckoned to Tom again.
When Tom strolled over, she asked, "Are you
single?"
"Why, yes," Tom replied, smiling at her broadly.
"So is my mom," she said. "Would you like to
meet her?"
约会
在汤姆工作的大楼里有一个咖啡屋，那儿总有一位小姐每天都和他打招呼。汤姆有些受宠若惊，因为这位小姐看上去至少比他年轻15岁。一天她又对汤姆招手并示意汤姆过去。于是汤姆走了过去。她问道，“您现在是单身吗？” “对，是单身，”汤姆满脸堆笑的说。 “我母亲也是，”她说，“您愿不愿意见见她？”
理所当然
Taken for Granted
THE SCHOOL HEALTH FORMS had been
distributed to the students with an error---the word 英语幽默小故事集锦
"Sex" had been spelled with an "o". One mother,
filling out the form for her son, wrote in the blank
next to "Sox": "Usually brown."
理所当然
某学校发给学生的健康调查表里有个错别字——把“性别”的“性”字写成了“袜”字。一位母亲在为她的儿子填写表格时，在“袜别”的那栏填上了：“棕色为主。”