初中英语课堂笑话
20XX年初一英语小笑话欣赏

20XX年初一英语小笑话欣赏笑话,是供人们消遣或交际的一种创造性的语言形式,其主要功能是调侃、娱乐或讽刺。
它是人们生活中不可或缺的组成部分,与社会密切相关。
小编精心收集了初一英语小笑话,供大家欣赏学习!初一英语小笑话篇1mr. johnson: are you using you mower this afternoon?约翰逊先生:今天下午你准备用割草机吗?mr.smith: yes.史密斯先生:是的。
mr.johnson: fine. then can i borrow your tennis racket, since you won't be needing it?约翰逊先生:太好了。
既然您不用网球拍,那我可以借用一下吗?初一英语小笑话篇2“father," said jim, running into the drawing-room, " there's a big black cat in the dining-room."吉米跑进客厅说:“爸爸,餐厅里有一只大黑猫!”"never mind, jimmy," said his father drowsily, "black cats are1/ 3lucky."他的父亲懒洋洋得说:“没关系,吉米,黑猫是幸运猫呢。
”"this one is, he's just had your dinner!"“它的确很幸运:(因为)它刚把你的晚饭给吃了。
”初一英语小笑话篇3proctor (exceedingly angry):"so you confess that this unfortunate freshman was carried to this frog pond and drenched? now what part did you take in this disgraceful affair?"学监(非常生气):“现在你承认这可怜的新生被扔进这蛙池里,浑身湿透?那么你在这不光彩的事情里扮演了什么角色呢?”sophomore (meekly):"the right leg, sir."二年级学生(恭顺地):“右腿,先生。
英语小笑话适合初一的

英语小笑话适合初一的笑话是一种用来逗笑取乐的文体。
笑话,不仅能让同学们在日常生活和学习中不时地会心一笑,还能从中学习到不少的英语知识。
小编精心收集了适合初一的英语小笑话,供大家欣赏学习!适合初一的英语小笑话篇1白痴老师If there are any idiots in the room,will they please stand up?" said the sarcastic teacher .喜爱挖苦人的老师说:“如果在这间教室里面有白痴,就请站起来好吗?”。
After a long silence,one rreshman rose to his feet,沉默了很久之后,有一名新生就站起来了。
"Now then mister ,why do you consider yourself an idiot? "enquired the teacher with a sneer.老师就以讥笑的口气问他:“喂,先生,你为什么认为你自己是个白痴呀?”"Well ,actually I don't,"said the student ,"but I hate to see you standing up there all by yourself."这名学生说:“ 唉呀,实际上我才不认为我是个白痴呢,而是我很讨厌看着你一个人站在那里啦。
”适合初一的英语小笑话篇2交换三明治Two attorneys went into a diner and ordered two drinks.有两位律师走进一家小餐厅。
点了两份饮料。
Then they produced sandwiches from their briefcases and started to eat.然后他们就从他们的公文包当中拿出三明治开始吃。
The waiter became quite concerned服务生感到相当不妥,and marched over and told them,"You can't eat your own sandeiches in here!"就走过去告诉他们:“你们不可以在这里吃你们自己的三明治!”The attorneys looked each other ,这两位律师彼此。
适合初中学生的英语笑话

适合初中学生的英语笑话从古到今,笑话是人们生活中不可缺少的调剂品,它使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松。
本文是适合初中学生的英语笑话,希望对大家有帮助!适合初中学生的英语笑话篇一WomenA Sikh, an Italian & a Frenchman were drinking in a pub when the subject ofWOMAN came up in their conversation.The Italian said, in Italy we treat the woman like a guitar. We press the top & tickle the bottom.The Frenchman said, in France, we treat the woman like cognac. We smell first & then lick slowly. What about the woman in your country,Mr Singh?The Italian asked.In our country, we treat the woman like a record. First we play the front &/when we finish, we flip it over & play the back.适合初中学生的英语笑话篇二Bill GatesBill Gates dies in a car accident. He finds himself in purgatory, being sized up by God"Well, Bill, I'm really confused on this call; I'm not sure whether to send you to Heaven or Hell. After all, you enormously helped society by putting a computer in almost every home in America, yet you also created that ghastly Windows '95. I'm going to do somethingI've never done before; in your case, I'm going to let you decide where you want to go."Bill replied, " Well, what's the difference between the two?"God said, "I'm willing to let you visit both places briefly, if it will help your decision.""Fine, but where should I go first?""I'll leave that up to you.""Okay then," said Bill, "Let's try Hell first."So Bill went to Hell.It was a beautiful, clean, sandy beach with clear waters and lots of beautiful women running around, playing in the water, laughing and frolicking about. The sun was shining, the temperature perfect. He was very pleased."This is great!" he told God. "If this is hell, I REALLY want to see heaven!""Fine," said God, and off they went. Heaven was a place high in the clouds, with angels drifting about, playing harps and singing. It was nice, but not as enticing as Hell.Bill thought for a quick minute, and rendered his decision."Hmmmm. I think I'd prefer Hell," he told God. "Fine," retorted God, "as you desire." So Bill Gates went to Hell. Two weeks later, God decided to check on the late billionaire to see how he was doing in Hell. When he got there, he found Bill, shackled to a wall, screaming amongst hot flames in dark caves, being burned and tortured by demons."How's everything going?" he asked Bill.Bill responded, with his voice filled with anguish and disappointment,"this is awful! This is nothing like the Hell I visited two weeks ago! I can't believe this is happening! What happened to that other place, with the beaches, the beautiful women playing in the water "That was the SCREENSAVER," replied God.适合初中学生的英语笑话篇三CoincidenceA man walks into a bar, sits down and orders a triple martini. The bartender says "What a coincidence, the only other person at the bar is that beautiful woman at the other end. She is also drinking triple martinis".After a few sips of his drink, the man walks up to the woman and says, "Isn't it a coincidence that we are both having the same drink".She replies "Yes! I am here because I am celebrating. After 20 years of trying I am finally pregnant!""What a coincidence" the man replied. "I am also celebrating.After years of experimenting, I have invented a multicolored chicken. At this, the woman asked "How did you ever accomplish that!?"."I had to try a lot of different cocks" he said. The woman replied"What a coincidence"适合初中学生的英语笑话篇四son-in-lawA 60 year old woman came home one day and heard strange noises in her bedroom. She opened the door and discovered her 40 year old daughter playing with a vibrator. "What are you doing?" asked the mother."Mom, I'm 40 years old, and look at me. I'm ugly. I'll never get married so this is pretty much my husband." The mother walked out of the room shaking her head.The next day, the father came home and heard noises in the bedroom. Upon entering the room, he found his daughter using the vibrator."What the hell are you doing he asked.His daughter replied, "I already told mom. I'm 40 years old now and I'm ugly. I will never get married so this is as close as I'll ever get to a husband." The father walked out of the room shaking his head.The next day, the mother came home and found her husband with a beer in one hand and the vibrator in the other watching the football game onTV. "What on Earth are you doing?" she cried.The husband replied, "What does it look like I'm doing? I'm having a beer and watching the football game with my son-in-law!!"。
关于初中的英语笑话带翻译

关于初中的英语笑话带翻译笑话是幽默的一个属概念,具有幽默的一切特征。
笑话是民族特有幽默的一种形式。
本文是关于初中的英语笑话带翻译,希望对大家有帮助!关于初中的英语笑话带翻译篇一How Did You Ever Get HereOne winter morning, an employee explained why he had shown up for work 45 minutes late. "It was so slippery out that for every step I took ahead, I slipped back two."The boss eyed him suspiciously. "Oh, yeah? Then how did you ever get here?""I finally gave up," he said, "and started for home."你是怎样来的?一个冬天的早晨,一名雇员解释他为什么迟到了四十五分钟才起来上班。
“外面太滑了,我每向前迈一步,就要向后退两步。
”老板狐疑地看着他。
“噢,是吗?那你是怎样到这里来的?”“后来我决定放弃,”他说,“然后我就往家里走。
”关于初中的英语笑话带翻译篇二Three SurgeonsThree famous surgeons were bragging about their skills. "A man came to me who had his hand cut off," said one. "Today that man is a concert violinist.""That's nothing," said another. "A guy came to me who had his legs cut off. I stitched them back on, and today that man is a marathon runner.""I can top both of you," said the third. "One day I came on the scene of a terrible accident. There was nothing left but a horse's posterior - and a pair of glasses. Today that man is seated in United States Senate."三个外科医生三个有名的外科医生正在吹嘘他们的技术。
初中英语笑话

1.Oncetwohunterswenthuntingintheforest.Oneofthem suddenlyfelldownbyaccident.Heshowedthewhitesofhiseyesandseemedtohavec easedbreathing.Theotherhuntersoontookouthis mobilephonetocalltheemergencycenterforhelp.Theoperatorsaidcalmly:"Fir st,youshouldmakesurethatheisalreadydead."Thentheoperatorheardagunshot fromtheotherendofthephoneandnextheheardthehunterasking:"WhatshouldIdo next?"两个猎人进森林里打猎,其中一个猎人不慎跌倒,两眼翻白,似已停止呼吸。
另一个猎人赶紧拿出手机拨通紧急求助电话。
接线员沉着地说:“第一步,要先确定你的朋友已经死亡。
”于是,接线员在电话里听到一声枪响,然后听到那猎人接着问:“第二步怎办?”2.Letmetakeitdown Anelephantsaidtoamouse,"nodoubtthatyouarethesmallestznd mostuselessthingthatIhaveeverseen.""Pless,sayitagain.Letmetakeitdown."themousesaid."Iwilltella fleawhatIknow."为我所用一头大象对一只小老鼠说:“你无疑是我见过的最小、最没用的东西。
”“请再说一遍,让我把它记下来。
”老鼠说。
“我要讲给我认识的一只跳蚤听。
3.WateringFlowerInRainTom:Whydoyouhavethatwateringcan?Dan:I'mgoingtowatertheflowers.Tom:Butit'draining.Dan:That'sOK.I'mwear-ingmyraincoat.雨天浇花汤姆:你拿喷壶做什么?丹:我要去浇花。
英语爆笑笑话6则带翻译双语阅读

英语爆笑笑话6则带翻译双语阅读笑话是指以一句短语或一个小故事让说话者和听者之间觉得好笑,或是产生幽默感,另外一个行动(动作)型的笑话是以动作影响人的视觉及观感,而感到好笑。
下面一起来看一下一些爆笑英语笑话吧。
In music class, the teacher asked Jack: “Please answer me what the oldest musical instrument is.”音乐课上,老师问杰克:“请回答,世界上最古老的乐器是什么?”Jack answered unhesitatingly: “It is the accordion.”杰克坚定地回答:“是手风琴。
”The teacher asked doubtfully: “Why do you say that it is the accordion, my dear boy?”老师疑惑地问:“为什么是手风琴呢,英语笑话我可爱的孩子?”Jack s aid: “Teacher, don’t you see that the accordion is completely covered by wrinkles.”杰克说:“老师,您没看见手风琴上全是皱纹吗?”最好的解释The Best ExplanationOnce in a physics class, Tom’s teacher asked the students: “When it thunders, why do we see the lightning first, then hear the thunders?”一次物理课上,汤姆的老师问同学们:“当打雷的时候,为什么我们先看到闪电,然后才听到雷声呢?”Tom answered the question very quickly, while his classmates were thinking it hard.当同学们都还在苦思冥想时,英语笑话汤姆很快就答了上来。
初中英语笑话

初中英语笑话————————————————————————————————作者:————————————————————————————————日期:1.Oncetwohunters wenthunting in the forest. One of them suddenlyfell downby accident.He showed thewhitesofhis eyes andseemedto have ceased breathing. The other huntersoon took out his mobilephone tocall the emergencycenter for help. Theoperator saidcalmly:"First, youshouldmake sure that he is already dead."Then theoperator heard a gunshot from the other end of the phone andnext he heardthe hunter asking:"Whatshould I donext?"两个猎人进森林里打猎,其中一个猎人不慎跌倒,两眼翻白,似已停止呼吸。
另一个猎人赶紧拿出手机拨通紧急求助电话。
接线员沉着地说:“第一步,要先确定你的朋友已经死亡。
”于是,接线员在电话里听到一声枪响,然后听到那猎人接着问:“第二步怎办?”2.Let me takeitdownAn elephantsaid to amouse,"no doubt thatyouare the smallestznd most uselessthing that Ihave e ver seen.""Pless ,say it again .Let metake it down ."the mouse said."I will tell a flea what I know."为我所用一头大象对一只小老鼠说:“你无疑是我见过的最小、最没用的东西。
八年级英文小笑话阅读

八年级英文小笑话阅读笑话是日常生活中人们消遣娱乐的一种常见语言现象,其目的在于在会话过程中传递和激发幽默感。
店铺整理了八年级英文小笑话,欢迎阅读!八年级英文小笑话篇一Younger Scout: How can I tell the difference between a mushroom and a toadstool?年少的童子军:我怎样才能把蘑菇和毒蕈区别开呢?Older Scout: Just eat one before you go to bed. If you wake up the next morning, it was a mushroom.年长的童子军:上床前吃一个。
如果你第二天早上醒来,那就是蘑菇。
八年级英文小笑话篇二Working at the post office, I'm used to dealing with a moody public. So when one irate customer stormed my desk, I responded in my calmest voice, "What's the trouble?" "I went out this morning," she began, "and when I came home I found a card saying the mailman tried to deliver a package but no one was home. My husband was in all morning. He never heard a thing!" After apologizing, I got her parcel. "Oh, good," she gushed. "We've been waiting for this for ages." "What is it?" I asked. "My husband's new hearing aid."我在邮局上班,对于顾客们的各种情绪早已习以为常了。
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初中英语课堂笑话
All In the family都在这一家
Eight-year-old Sally brought her report card home from school .
八十岁大的莎莉从学校把她的成绩报告卡带回家。
Her marks were good mostly .
她的成绩不错,
A's and a couple of B'S .
大部分都是A,还有几个B。
However ,her teacher had written across the bottom,可是,她韵老师在卡片下方写道:
"SALLY is a smart little girl,but she has one fault,“莎莉是个聪明的小女孩,但是她有一个毛病。
she talks too much in school.I have an idea I am going to try,她在学校太爱讲话。
我有一个想法我要来试试看,
which I think may break her of the bad habit."
我认为.这个想法可能会让她改掉这个坏习惯。
”
Sally's dad signed her report card,
莎莉的爸爸签了她的学习报告卡,
putting a note on the back ,
并在卡片背面注记:
"Please let me know if your idea work on SALLY
“如果你的想法对莎莉很有效,请你让我知道,
because I would like to try it out on her mother."
因为我想要把它试用在她妈妈身上。
Cooking Class烹饪课
One day during cooking class,
一天在上烹饪课的时候,
our teacher ,Mrs,Brown,was extolling her secrets for preparing perfect sauces .
我们的老师布朗太太正在颂扬她:准备完美酱料的秘诀。
When she ordered us to the stoves to the prepare our assignments,
当她把我们叫到炉子边作准备工作时,
she said, "Don't forget to use wooden spoons ."
她说:“别忘了要用木制的汤匙”。
As I stirred my sauce ,
当我在搅拌酱料时,
I contemplated the physica behind the mystery of the wooden spoon
我一直苦思木制汤匙奥秘的背后所隐含的物理原理,
and decided it must have something to do with heat conduction.
然后认定它一定与热传导有关系。
I approached Mrs.Brown to test my theory .
我走向布朗太太来测试我'韵理论。
"Why wooden spoons?"I asked .
我问:“为什么要用木制汤匙呢?”
"Because," she replied , "If I Have to sit here listening to all your metal spoons banging against metal pots ,I will go nuts!"
她回答:“因为,如果我必须坐在这里听你们全部的金属汤匙砰砰敲着金属的罐子,我会发疯喔”。
Faithful Cat忠实的猫
Once upon a time ,a woman had a faithful cat.
从前有个妇人有一只忠实的猫。
And one day,a guy ran over the cat with his horse drawn carriage.
有一天,有个人用他的马车将猫辗死。
So,the man went to the old woman and said,
因此,这个人就去找这位老妇人说:
"I am terribly sorry about your cat.I'd like to replace him."
“我对你的猫感到非常抱歉,我愿意代替它。
”
"That's so nice of you!" said the old woman,deeply touched.
这位老妇人深深地感动说:“你真好心呀!”“你抓老鼠的功夫很棒吗?”
"So how good are you at catching mice?"
Laboratory Tests实验室检查
Two children were sitting outside a clinic.
有两个小孩子坐在一间诊疗室外面。
One of them was crying very loudly.
其中一个小孩子哭得非常犬声。
2nd Child;Why are you crying?
第二位小孩子说:“你为什么哭呀?”
1st Child:I came here for blood test.
第一位小孩子说:“我来这里验血呀”
2nd Child:So?Are you afraid?
第二位小孩子说:“那又怎样?你害怕呀?”
1st Child :No .Not that.For the blood test,they cut my finger.
第一位小孩子说:“不怕呀,又不是那样啦。
因为验血的话,他们要割我的手指头啦。
”
At this,the second one started crying.
一听到这么说,第二位小孩子就开始哭了,
The first one was astonished.
第一位小孩子就非常惊讶。
1st Child :Why are you crying now?
第一位小孩子说:“你现在为什幺哭呀?”
2nd Child :I have come for my urine?test!
第二位小孩子说:“我来这里微尿液检验的啦.!”
感谢您的阅读,祝您生活愉快。