爆笑中式英语,专门用来搞笑的
中国式英语分为两种。一种是Chinese English，一种是China English。
其中Chinese English就是Chinglish，是用中式的语法和英式的词汇组合成的，属于语言不规范使用。而China English指的则是中国特有的东西，是允许存在的。比如“饺子、功夫、气功、阴阳”等词，都用音译进入了英文词典。
生活中的Chinglish(中式英语)既是小错误小尴尬，也会令人捧腹大笑。
1. How are you ? How old are you? 怎么是你，怎么老是你？
2. You have seed. I will give you some color to see see. Brothers！Together up! 你有种，我要给你点颜色瞧瞧，兄弟们，一起上！
3. Dragon born dragon, chicken born chicken, mouse"s son can make hole! 龙生龙，凤生凤，老鼠的儿子会打洞！
4. Chickens That Did Not Have Sexual Experience 童子鸡
5. Four Glad Meatballs 直译：四个开心的肉球被用为：四喜丸子
6. Wash after relief 用过请冲水解释：中国的厕所光冲（flush）不行，居然还要“洗”（wash）！
7. You ask me，me ask who？你问我，我问谁
8. Heart flower angry open. 心花怒放
9. One car come,one car go,two car pengpeng,one car died! 关于一场车祸的描述
10. Horse horse tiger tiger. 马马虎虎
11. Good good study, day day up. 好好学习，天天向上
12. No three no four. 不三不四
13. Know is know, noknow is noknow. 知之为知之，不知为不知
If you want money,I have no;if you want life,I have one! 要钱没有，要命一条
14. watch sister 表妹
15. fire big 火大
16. Go past, no mistake past. 走过路过，不要错过
17. As far as you go to die. 有多远，死多远
18. We two who and who? 咱俩谁跟谁？
19. people moumtain people sea 人山人海
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最新整理最搞笑的英语小笑话十则
最搞笑的英语小笑话十则 生活中怎么能少了笑话来调味一下我们乏味枯燥 的日常呢?一则搞笑的小笑话就能让我们原本苦恼的心情立刻变得像春天的鲜花一样灿烂，学习啦小编为你准备了非常搞笑的英语笑话及其翻译，希望你的生活像夏日的阳光一样! 搞笑的英语小笑话1：E x p e n s i v e P r i c e D e n t i s t:I m s o r r y,m a d a m,b u t I l l h a v e t o c h a r g e y o u t w e n t y-f i v e d o l l a r s f o r p u l l i n g y o u r s o n s t o o t h. M o t h e r: T w e n t y-f i v e d o l l a r s! B u t I t h o u g h t y o u o n l y c h a r g e d f i v e d o l l a r s f o r a n e x t r a c t i o n. D e n t i s t:I u s u a l l y d o.B u t y o u r s o n y e l l e d s o l o u d,h e s c a r e d f o u r o t h e r p a t i e n t s o u t o f t h e o f f i c e. 昂贵的代价 牙科医生：对不起，夫人，为给您的儿子拔牙，我得收二十五美元。 母亲：二十五美元!可是我知道您拔一颗牙只要五美元呀?
牙科医生：是的。但是您儿子这么大声地叫唤，他都吓跑四位病人了 搞笑的英语小笑话2：I W a s n t A s l e e p W h e n a g r o u p o f w o m e n g o t o n t h e c a r,e v e r y s e a t w a s a l r e a d y o c c u p i e d.T h e c o n d u c t o r n o t i c e d a m a n w h o s e e m e d t o b e a s l e e p, a n d f e a r i n g h e m i g h t m i s s h i s s t o p, h e n u d g e d h i m a n d s a i d:W a k e u p,s i r! I w a s n t a s l e e p,t h e m a n a n s w e r e d. N o t a s l e e p?B u t y o u h a d y o u r e y e s c l o s e d. I k n o w. I j u s t h a t e t o l o o k a t l a d i e s s t a n d i n g u p b e s i d e m e i n a c r o w d e d c a r. 我没有睡着 当一群妇女上车之后，车上的座位全都被占满了。售票员注意到一名男子好象是睡着了，他担心这个人会坐过站，就用肘轻轻地碰了碰他，说：先生，醒醒! 我没有睡着。那个男人回答。 没睡着?可是你眼睛都闭上了呀? 我知道，我只是不愿意看到在拥挤的车上有女士站在我身边而已。
关于英语小笑话简单爆笑
关于英语小笑话简单爆笑 篇一：爆笑的经典英语小笑话 爆笑的经典英语小笑话 英语笑话（一） 老师在黑板上写了一句： Time is money.并让同学们翻译。 有名学生答道： “汤姆是玛丽。 ” 小明上英文课时跟老师说：May I go to the toilet? 老师说：Go ahead. 小明就坐了下来。过了一会儿，小明又跟老师说：May I go to the toilet? 老师说：Go ahead. 小明又坐了下来。 他旁边的同学于是忍不住问： 你不是跟老师说要上厕所吗？怎么不去？ 小明说：你没听老师说「去你个头」啊！ 英语笑话（二） 某日刘洪涛遇到外宾，上前搭话曰：I am hongtao liu，外宾曰：我 TM 还是方片七呢！ 英语笑话（三） 江青会见外宾，要求翻译要严格按她的意思翻，不许走样。外宾一见到江青，立刻拍马 屁道："Miss Jiang, you are very beautiful." 翻译照翻，江青心花怒 放，嘴上还要谦虚一下：“哪 里，哪里”。 翻译不敢怠慢，把江青的话翻成英文："Where? Where?" 外宾一愣，还有这样的人，追 问哪里漂亮的，干脆马屁拍到底："Everywhere, everywhere." 翻译：“你到处都很漂亮。”江青更高兴了，但总是要客气一下：“不见得，不见得”。翻 译赶紧翻成英文："You are not allowed to see, you are not allowed to see." 英语笑话（四） 话说某年某月的某一天，叁个神箭手约在一起比箭，目标是十尺外仆人头上的苹果。 A 神箭手挽弓长射，咻一声，利箭正中苹果。A 高傲的昂起下巴，比出一根大 拇指道：「I AM 后羿！」 B 神箭手照本宣科，射中苹果，这回他自大的喊了一句：「I AM 丘比特！」 轮到 C 了，他也挽弓，利箭射出！ 结果正中仆人的心脏。就听他结结巴巴好久才吐出一 句：「I...I...I...AM...SORRY...」 英语笑话（五） 某人刻苦学习英语，终有小成。一日上街不慎与一老外相撞， 忙说：I am sorry. 老外应道：I am sorry too. 某人听后又道：I am sorry three. 老外不解，问：What are you sorry for? 某人无奈，道：I am sorry five. 英语笑话（六）
经典搞笑英语翻译
经典搞笑英语翻译 1．we two who and who？咱俩谁跟谁阿2．how are you ? how old are you? 怎么是你，怎么老是你？3．you don't bird me,I don't bird you 你不鸟我，我也不鸟你4．you have seed I will give you some color to see see, brothers！together up ！你有种，我要给你点颜色瞧瞧，兄弟们，一起上！5．hello everybody!if you have something to say,then say!if you have nothing to say,go home!! 有事起奏，无事退朝6．you me you me 彼此彼此7．You Give Me Stop!! 你给我站住！8．know is know noknow is noknow 知之为知之，不知为不知… 9．W ATCH SISTER 表妹10．dragon born dragon,chicken born chicken,mouse''son can make hole!! 龙生龙，凤生凤，老鼠的儿子会打洞！11．American Chinese not enough 美中不足12．one car come one car go ,two car pengpeng,people die 车祸现场描述13．heart flower angry open 心花怒放14．go past no mistake past 走过路过，不要错过15．小明：I am sorry! 老外：I am sorry too! 小明：I am sorry three! 老外：What are you sorry for? 小明：I am sorry five! 16．If you want money,I have no;if you want life,I have one! 要钱没有，要命一条17．I call Li old big. toyear 25. 我叫李老大，今年25。18．you have two down son。你有两下子。19．as far as you go to die 有多远，死多远！！！！20．I give you face you don''t wanna face,you lose you face , I turn my face 给你脸你不要脸，你丢脸，我翻脸
高中英语幽默笑话故事五篇
高中英语幽默笑话故事五篇 有时候阅读一些幽默搞笑的英语故事，除了能让人产生兴趣更能提高英语阅读水平。以下是小编给大家整理的关于高中英语幽默笑话故事，希望可以帮到大家 关于高中英语幽默笑话故事 the wolf and the fox wanted to eat the rabbit, but it wasn't easy to catch him. one day the wolf said to the fox, "you go home and lie in bed. i'll tell the rabbit that you are dead. when he comes to look at you, you can jump up and catch him." that's a good idea," said the fox. he went home at once. the wolf went to the rabbit's house and knocked at the door. "who is it?" asked the rabbit. "it's the wolf. i've come to tell you that the fox is dead." then the wolf went away. the rabbit went to the fox's house. he looked in through the window and saw the fox lying in bed with his eyes closed. he thought, "is the fox really dead or is he pretending to be dead? if he's not dead, he'll catch me when i go near him." so he said, "the wolf says that the fox is dead. but he doesn't look like a dead fox. the mouth of a dead fox is always open." when the fox heard this, he thought, "i'll show him that i'm dead." so he opened his mouth. the rabbit knew that the fox wasn't dead, and he ran as quickly as he could. 狼和狐狸想要吃掉兔子，但是这只兔子太难抓到了。 一天，狼对狐狸说：“你回家假装躺在床上。我去告诉兔子你已经死了。当他来看你的时候，你就可以跳起来抓住他了。”“真是个好主意!”狐狸说。 于是他立刻回到家。狼去兔子的房前敲了敲门，“是谁啊?”兔子问道。“狼，我是来告诉你狐狸已经死了。”说完狼就走开了。
超级爆笑的英语单词
超级爆笑的英语单词。English is a crazy language. 英语里有许多非常好玩的单词。它们的词意和表明上看起来的完全没有关系。 There is no egg in eggplant (1) nor ham in hamburger(2)，neither apple nor pine in pineapple(3)。 鸡蛋和茄子没什么血缘关系;苹果和凤梨的长相差距很大。 English muffins(4) weren't invented in England or French fries(5) in France。 英式松饼的家乡不是英国;炸土豆条的发源地也不是法国。 Sweetmeats(6) are candies while sweetbreads(7)，which aren't sweet, are meat。 蜜饯(sweetmeats)不是肉，是甜的;杂碎(sweetbreads)是肉，不是甜的。 We find that quicksand(8) can work slowly, boxing rings(9) are square and a guinea pig(10) is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig。 流沙其实流得很慢;拳击台是方形的;实验用的小豚鼠的老家不是几内亚，长相和猪属于两种型。 If a vegetarian(11) eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian(12) eat?
素食主义者吃蔬菜，人道主义者吃人(human)? How can a slim chance(13) and a fat chance(14) be the same, while a wise man(15) and wise guy(16) are opposites? 胖瘦截然相反，可后面跟着chance就都变成“机会渺茫”了;聪明人(wise man)改一个词，就沦落为自作聪明的人(wise guy)。 How can overlook(17) and oversee(18) be opposites, while quite a lot(19) and quite a few(20) are alike? Look和see是近义词，但oversee监视，overlook意思怎么就是忽视呢;A lot和a few是反义词，但与quite连用，怎么都表示很多的意思呢! When the stars are out(21)，they are visible, but when the lights are out(22)，they are invisible。 星星出来了，我们能看到它们;灯灭了，我们就什么也看不见了。 When you wind up your watch(23)，you start it, but when you wind up an essay(24)，you end it? 给表上发条，表就开始走了;wind up一篇文章，哈哈，文章到此结束啦。
笑死人的中式英语标牌
笑死人的中式英语标牌 中国式的英语标牌在中国随处可见，这在老外看来会觉得很“搞笑”，让人哭笑不得。尤其那些中文语法加上英文词汇的Chinese-Ordered English，有些简直雷死人，甚至成色情笑话。有老外拍下这些搞笑的中式英语图标上传网络供人娱乐。 笑死人的中式英语标牌（网络图片） 1、Disposable items 一次性用品，一个字一个字的直译，一次(A time)性(Sex)用品(thing）简直吓死人！
笑死人的中式英语标牌（网络图片） 2、Fire extinguisher 灭火器，翻译成了Hand Grenade 手榴弹。
笑死人的中式英语标牌（网络图片） 3、CARP 鲤鱼，错拼成CRAP 粪便，而且还是“新鲜”的。
笑死人的中式英语标牌（网络图片） 4、neonatal cardiac observation room 胎心监护室，翻成了Heart Custody：Heart 心灵； Custody 拘禁/拘留。
笑死人的中式英语标牌（网络图片） 5、Ethnic minority park 民族园，翻成Racist Park， Racist是种族主义的意思，难道要恢复种族歧视？ 笑死人的中式英语标牌（网络图片） 6、Be careful not to slip and fall 小心滑倒， Slip and fall down carefully 请慢慢地滑倒！
笑死人的中式英语标牌（网络图片） 7、Construction in progress施工中，翻成Execution in progress 死刑在执行中。简直吓死人了！