初中英语课前三分钟笑话演讲稿
英语演讲稿笑话（精选多篇）
-------------------------------------------------------精选财经经济类资料---------------------------------------------- -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 英语演讲稿笑话(精选多篇) two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. he doesn’t seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. the other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. he gasps, “my friend is dead! what can i do?”. th e operator says “calm down. i can help. first, let’s make sure he’s dead.” there is a silence, then a shot is heard. back on the phone, the guy says “ok, now what?”简单翻译: 两个猎人在森林里打猎,突然甲倒下了并且看上去不再呼吸了,眼睛也变得呆滞. 乙赶紧拿起电话打给救护中心,上气-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 不接下气的说:”我的朋友死了,怎么办?.”服务人员说:”淡定,我有办法.首先,我们嘚确保他是死了.” 安静了一会儿,电话里响起了一阵枪声,电话那头乙说道:”好了,那接下来怎么办.”下面是被评选世界第二搞笑的笑话：sherlock holmes and dr watson were going camping. they pitched their tent under the stars and went to sleep. sometime in the middle of the night holmes woke wat son up and said: “watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you see.”watson replied: “i see millions and millions of stars.”holmes said: “and what do you deduce from that?”watson replied: “well, if there are millions of stars, and if even a few of those have planets, it ’s quite likely there are some planets like earth out there. and if -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- there are a few planets like earth out there, there might also be life.”and holmes said: “watson, you idiot, it means that somebody stole our tent.”简单翻译:甲乙一起去野营.他俩在星光下搭好帐篷然后睡去. 半夜的某时,甲叫醒乙:”抬头看看那些星星,然后告诉我你发现了什么”乙:”我看见好多好多的星星.”甲:”如此你能推断出什么结论?”乙回答道:”嗯假如天上有无数的恒星,而且其中一些有自己的行星,那么很有可能就会有像地球一样的星球存在.假如有像地球一样的星球存在,那里还可能存在生物.”甲无语:”你个sb.这说明有人偷了我们的帐篷.”英语笑话笑话一：a woman gets on a bus with her b aby. the bus driver says: “that’s the ugliest baby that i’ve ever seen. ugh!” the woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- down, fuming. she says to a man next to her: “the driver just insulted me!” the man says: “you go right up there and tell him off – go ahead, i’ll hold your monkey for you.”笑话二：sherlock holmes and dr watson were going camping. they pitched their tent under the stars and went to sleep. sometime in the middle of the night holmes woke watson up and said: “watson, look up at the sky, and tell me what you see.” watson replied: “i see millions and millions of stars.” holmes said: “and what do you deduce from that?” watson replied: “well, if there are millions of stars, and if even a few of those have planets, it ’s quite likely there are some planets like earth out there. and if there are a few planets like earth out there, there might also be life.” and holmes said: “watson, you idiot, it means that somebody stole our tent.”1.a boy swore to a girl: ‘honey, do -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- please marry me, otherwise i’ll die’the girl refused. sixty years later, the boy died. 一男生向一女生发誓：亲爱的，请你一定要嫁给我，不然我会死掉的女孩拒绝了。
初中幽默英语演讲稿【精选3篇】
初中幽默英语演讲稿【精选3篇】初中幽默英语演讲稿【精选3篇】演讲稿是作为在特定的情境中供口语表达使用的文稿。
随着社会不断地进步，演讲稿对我们的作用越来越大，如何写一份恰当的演讲稿呢？以下是小编帮大家整理的初中幽默英语演讲稿【精选3篇】，希望能够帮助到大家。
初中幽默英语演讲稿【精选3篇】1Love Your Mother爱你的母亲Why are you crying, a young boy asked his Mom?你为什么哭?一个小男孩问他的妈妈."Because I'm a woman," she told him.因为我是女人,她告诉他."I don't understand," he said.我不明白.他回答His Mom just hugged him and said,"And you never will, but that's O.K.".......妈妈拥抱了他说,"你永远也不会明白,但没关系..."Later the little boy asked his father,"Why does Mom seem to cry for no reason?".后来小男孩问他的父亲"妈妈为什么似乎在无缘无故的哭泣?""All women cry for no reason," was all his Dad could say......"所有的女人都会常常没有原因地哭泣",这是他的父亲唯一可以解释的..The little boy grew up and became a man,still wondering why women cry.等到小男孩长大,成了男人的时候,他仍然奇怪妈妈为什么哭.Finally he put in a call to God and when God got back to him,he asked "God, why do women cry so easily?"最后他把这件事祷告给上帝,他问"上帝,为什么女人容易哭泣?"GOD answered......上帝回答:"When I made woman,I decided she had to be special.I made her shouldersstrong enough to carrythe weight of the world, yet,made her arms gentle enough to give comfort..."当我创造女人的时候,我决定把她造的很特别,我让她的双肩强壮的足以能够承担整个世界,但是,却让她的双臂温柔的足够去安慰他人...I gave her the inner strengthto endure childbirthand the rejectionthat many times will comeeven from her own children.我给她内在的力量去忍受生产的剧痛,也让她有勇气承受无数的伤害,甚至这些伤害有时会来自于自己的孩子...I gave her a hardnessthat allows herto keep going and take careof her family and friends,even when everyone else gives up, through sickneand fatigue withoutcomplaining....我给她顽强,让她能够不断地前进,并且照顾自己的家人和朋友,甚至当每个人都放弃的时候,她却能够坚强地在疾病和劳累之时毫无怨言...I gave her the sensitivity to love her children under any and all yanjianggao/ircumstances. Even when her child has hurt her badly....She has the very special power to make a child's boo-boo feel better and to quell a teenager's anxieties and fears....我给她内心的敏感,让她在任何环境下都深爱着自己的孩子.甚至在他们深深伤害她的'时候...她用那特别的力量，让年幼孩子的在受伤的时候感到安慰，也能够让年轻的子女消除紧张与恐惧...I gave her strength to care for her husband, despite faultsand I fashioned her from his rib to protect his heart....我给她力量关心她的丈夫，尽管他会犯错.我用男人的肋骨创造了女人，使女人可以保护男人的心脏...I gave her wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife, but sometimes tests her strengths and her resolve to stand beside him unfalteringly....我给她智慧，让她知道一个好丈夫永远不会伤害他的妻子，但有时候会试炼她坚定的永远跟随自己丈夫的能力与决心.For all of this hard work,I also gave her a tear to shed.It is hers to usewhenever needed andit is her only weakness....When you see her cry,tell her how much you love her, and all she does for everyone, and even thoughshe may still cry, you will have made her heart feel good.因为这些种种的困难，我也同样赐她流下眼泪，这是当她在需要时可以使用的，这是她唯一的软弱之处...当你看到她哭泣的时候，告诉她你有多么地爱她，告诉她她为所有人所做的一切，即使这样她可能还是会哭泣，但你会使她的心里得到安慰.She is special!Please send this to women you know, and those with mothers,sisters, and special women in their lives.她是独特的!请把这个信息传递给你认识的女人，有母亲，姐妹和特别的女性在他们生命里的人.But, also send this to men so they will understand about what a wonderful thing a woman is.Each day is a mountain that must be climbed; with courage each step gets easier.但是，也把这个信息传递给男人，因此他们会明白女人是多么奇妙的被造物.每一天，生活中都会有必须爬的山，但是勇气会使每一步都更轻松.Love your Mother Always永远爱你的母亲，and keep her Smiling并且使她微笑常在初中幽默英语演讲稿【精选3篇】2One of the most popular hobbies among people is readingbooks. More and more people spend their spare time in reading the books they are interested in.There are so many books in the world that it is impossible for any one to read all of them, even if he spends his whole life in reading. Before we start reading, we should find out whether it is valuable for us to read.Reading good books is one of the greatest pleasures in life. It can enrich our knowledge. It makes us learn lots of things we did not previously know. We can be aware of what had happened in the past as well as what is happening in the present time. The more books we read, the more knowledge we get. No matter how much education we receive or how much expensive we have, we can not become a full man unless we keep reading.Reading bad books will lead you to a wrong way and prevents you from progressing. It’s worse than reading nothing. So we know how important it is to read good books.book can be read at random time if you have leisure, and there never be a time limitation. Also, you can read a book to achieve a more really history. Through a book, you can communicate with its author without other’s transmission. All these rarely can be easily achieved by a television.Furthermore, book is a treasure that has developed centuries. As we know when written language appeared, human beings became use it to record their lives, and this action leaves us a lot of historic precious mineral. We can absorb intelligence and wisdom, and we can also be taught lessons. I love book from my heart, form book I know how to communicate with others, and I learn my homeland is the place I love best, and also I know my parents are the very inpiduals who I love through my life. What about the television? Television, sometimes, show violence, sex,drugs beyond our choice.初中幽默英语演讲稿【精选3篇】3Matt and his wife lived in the country. Matt was very stingy and hated spending money. One day a fair came to the nearby town."Let’s go to the fair, Matt," his wife said. "We haven’t been anywhere for a long time."Matt thought about this for a while. He knew he would have to spend money at the fair. At last he said, "All right, but I’m not going to spend much money. We’ll look at things, but we won’t buy anything. "They went to the fair and looked at all the things to buy. There were many things Matt’s wife wanted to buy, but he would not let her spend any money.Then, in a nearby field, they saw a small airplane."Fun flights!" the notice said, " $$ 10 for 10 minutes.Matt had never been in an airplane and he wanted to go on a fun flight. However, he di dn’t want to have to pay for his wife, as well."I’ve only got $$ 10, " he told the pilot. "Can my wife come with me for free?" The pilot wasn’t selling many tickets, so he said, "I’ll make a bargain with you. If your wife doesn’t scream or shout, she can have a free flight."Matt agreed, and got into the small airplane with his wife.The pilot took off and made his airplane do all kinds of things. At one moment it was flying upside down.When the plane landed, the pilot said, "0. K. your wife didn’t make a sound. She can have her ride free.""Thank you," Matt said. "It wasn’t easy for her, you know, especially when she fell out."。
初中英语演讲 有关于初中英语小笑话演讲
初中英语演讲有关于初中英语小笑话演讲笑话是民族文化不可或缺的一部分。
一位著名的心理学家说,最好的笑话是文字游戏。
小编精心收集了有关于初中英语小笑话，供大家欣赏学习!有关于初中英语小笑话篇1In the supermarket was a man pushing a cart which contained a screaming, bellowing gentleman kept repeating softly, “Don’t get excited, Albert; don’t scream, Albert; don’tyell, Albert; keep calm, Albert.”一个人在超市里推着购物车，一个小孩子在车里不停的大吵大叫。
推车的男人一直温柔地念叨着：”别激动，阿尔伯特，别嚷出来，阿尔伯特，别叫，阿尔伯特，冷静，阿尔伯特。
”A woman standing next to him said, “You certainly are to be commended for trying to sootheyour son, Albert.”站在他旁边的一位女士对他说道：“您能这样安慰您的儿子阿尔伯特真的让我们感到很不容易。
”The man looked at her and said, “Lady, I’m Albert.”男人看着那位女士说：“太太，我是阿尔伯特。
有关于初中英语小笑话篇2Chaucer was over seventy , but he was not convinced of his age. At a time he boasted: “Myphysical strength is as strong as that I was young.” The opposite person asked: “ What do yourely on? ” Chaucer said : “ There is a big stone roller in my compound. I couldn’t heave it whenwas young, neither can I now.”乔叟年过六旬，仍不服老。
英语演讲稿幽默3分钟9篇
英语演讲稿幽默3分钟9篇英语演讲稿幽默3分钟 (1) Someone said “we are reading the first verse of the first chapterof a book, whose pages are infinite”. I don’t know who wrote these words,but I’ve always liked them as a reminder that the future can be anythingwe want it to be. We are all in the position of the farmers. If we planta good seed ,we reap a good harvest. If we plant nothing at all, we harvestnothing at all.We are young. “How to spend the youth?” It is a meaningful question.To answer it, first I have to ask “what do you understand by the wordyouth?” Youth is not a time of life, it’s a state of mind. It’s nota matter of rosy cheeks, red lips or supple knees. It’s the matter ofthe will. It’s the freshness of the deep spring of life.A poet said “To see a world in a grain of sand, and a heaven in awild flower, hold infinity in the palm of your hand, and eternity in anhour. Several days ago, I had a chance to listen to a lecture. I learnta lot there. I’d like to share it with all of you. Let’s show our rightpalms. We can see threelines that show how our love.career and life is. I have a short lineof life. What about yours? I wondered whether we could see our future inthis way. Well, let’s make a fist. Where is our future? Where is our love,career, and life? Tell me.Yeah, it is in our hands. It is held in ourselves.We all want the future to be better than the past. But the future cango better itself. Don’t cry because it is over, smile because it happened.From the past, we’ve learnt that the life is tough, but we are tougher.We’ve learnt that we can’t choose how we feel, but we can choose whatabout it. Failure doesn’t mean you don’t have it, it does mean you shoulddo it in a different way. Failure doesn’t mean you should give up, it does mean you must try harder.As what I said at the beginning, “we are reading the first verse of the first chapter of a book, whose pages are infinite”. The past has gone. Nothing we do will change it. But the future is in frront of us. Believe that what we give to the world, the world will give to us. And from today on, let’s be the owners of ourselves, and speak out “We are the world, we are the future.”翻译：有人说“我们正在读一本书的第一章的第一节,页数无限的”。
英语演讲稿笑话(精选多篇)
英语演讲稿笑话(精选多篇)第一篇：英语笑话two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. he doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. the other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. he gasps, "my friend is dead! what can i do?". the operator says "calm down. i can help. first, let's make sure he's dead." there is a silence, then a shot is heard. back on the phone, the guy says "ok, now what?"简单翻译:两个猎人在森林里打猎,突然甲倒下了.并且看上去不再呼吸了,眼睛也变得呆滞.乙赶紧拿起电话打给救护中心,上气不接下气的说:"我的朋友死了,怎么办?."服务人员说:"淡定,我有办法.首先,我们嘚确保他是死了." 安静了一会儿,电话里响起了一阵枪声,电话那头乙说道:"好了,那接下来怎么办."下面是被评选世界第二搞笑的笑话：sherlock holmes and dr watson were going camping. they pitched their tent under the stars and went to sleep. sometime in the middle of the night holmes woke watson up and s aid: “watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you see.”watson replied: “i see millions and millions of stars.”holmes said: “and what do you deduce from that?”watson replied: “well, if there are millions of stars, and if even a few of those have planets, it’s quite likely there are some planets like earth out there. and if there are a few planets like earth out there, there might also be life.”and holmes said: “watson, you idiot, it means that somebody stole our tent.”简单翻译:甲乙一起去野营.他俩在星光下搭好帐篷然后睡去. 半夜的某时,甲叫醒乙:"抬头看看那些星星,然后告诉我你发现了什么?"乙:"我看见好多好多的星星."甲:"如此你能推断出什么结论?"乙回答道:"嗯...假如天上有无数的恒星,而且其中一些有自己的行星,那么很有可能就会有像地球一样的星球存在.假如有像地球一样的星球存在,那里还可能存在生物."甲无语:"你个sb.这说明有人偷了我们的帐篷."第二篇：英语笑话英语笑话笑话一：a woman gets on a bus with her baby. the bus driver says: "that's the ugliest baby that i've ever seen. ugh!" the woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. she says to a man next to her: "the driver just insulted me!" the man says: "you go right up there and tell him off – go ahead, i'll hold your monkey for you."(某女士带着宝宝坐公交车。
三分钟幽默搞笑英语演讲稿范文
三分钟幽默搞笑英语演讲稿范文在中国英语作为一门外语拥有最多的外语学习者，英语演讲已成为我们生活中必不可少的一部分,并且能有效地帮助我们发展语言应用及交际能力。
下面是店铺为你整理的几篇三分钟搞笑英语演讲稿范文，希望能帮到你哟。
三分钟搞笑英语演讲稿范文篇一once upon a time, a weenie ant was walking on his way. as he was walking, suddenly he felt the ground shaking terribly. he looked around with his paranoid eyes and saw an elephant walking right behind him. quickly, the little ant covered himself with dirt, but one leg was unfortunately left out. a sparrow saw everything, so she flew down with the purpose of teasing the ant: “hey, chicken! watch out your leg, it’s out!” the ant felt embarrassed at first but then calmly responded: “ shi…i am going to trip that elephant.”right now, i’m standing on this glamorous stage. but everything here reminds me of is a not so fun memory. around this time last year i was in nanjing competing in another speech contest. that was the first time for me to be in such a large event. of course the pressure i was under was immense too. after a sleepless and stressful night, i went onto that stage without the feeling in my legs. that speech turned out to be horrible. i don’t remember how i get down from there, but i do remember afterwards i just wanted to find a hole to hide in just like the ant in the story. back at my school, it took a long time for me to recover. thanks to all the help i got from my special friends. my confidence was restored. after rounds of giving speeches and answering tough questions, i am here today. from all tha t i’ve been through i’ve learned that a good future is based on aforgotten past, if i want my life to go on well i have to let go of my past failure. so today, with out fear, i am tripping my elephant again.三分钟搞笑英语演讲稿范文篇二good morning,dear teacher and my friends.it’s a very intresting topic today.i think my dad was a hero for me when i was a young child. we'd go fishing, walks, and other fun things for a kid.every child has a good and great father, and so do i. my dad played a very important role in my daily life`````exactly speaking, in my past 16 years.my father always stands in the center of my life， from past till now and possibly in the future.my family was rather poor when i was in my childhood. we didn't have our own house and had to live in a shabby， small room rented from my father's factory. the room was so small that there was little space for people to walk. i didn't have my own bed and had to sleep with my parents. this is terrible both for my parents and me.but father made this all different!he works very hard on his own business, now we have our own 2 housese,surly,i have my own room.and he take our family so much happiness, richer and richer.when i was little, i did everything with my dad. you could always find me sitting on his knee or walking and doing everything with him. every night he would read me a bed time story and make the voices of each character.i learnt a lot from my daddy. i learnt to never take things to seriously and to always smile.like many other fathers, my dad and i also has generationgap. he is not good at or even can’t work the computer. so when i sitting at the computer desk,he will say something like ‘you should pay more attention to your study’, ‘don’t waste time on the computer games’ , ‘it will be bad for your eyes’ and so on. how can i- a computer fan – reduce time on computer? so i continue studying and playing on ityears pasted, my father is over 45 now. it is time for me to look after him and i am sure i will do and we will live an even better life. and i will say,i really love you dad,cause you are the hero in my mind.thank you so much!三分钟搞笑英语演讲稿范文篇三the footsteps of the XX world expo is getting closer and closer to us, civilized and harmonious call is still ringing in my ears. shanghai, china obtained the right to host the world expo XX, expo XX shanghai china will be a world event, the development of shanghai's new round of golden opportunity, as it is an important embodiment of our national spirit.world expo is a great influence and a long history of international activities, is the largest gathering of human beings. people from around the world gathered in one place display their products and skills, boast of their hometown and motherland. expo set the culmination of human civilization, which has a unique appeal, make you feel surging.world expo is a platform, we are the masters. she put up a platform for us to let the world know us; she built a bridge for us, so we better communicate with the world. this platform may let us display self wantonly. we are the masters here, we have to landlord, let guest experience enthusiasm and happiness.everyone to contribute for the expo, we are no exception, asa living piece of fertile land in pudong's teachers, we are proud and pride. in the vision of a better tomorrow, we have to do for the world expo will own a wonderful ability, we have through our hands, warm heart and sincerity to practical action to achieve the commitment of shanghai to the world. we should educate the many students: do not throw garbage anywhere, no spitting, no jaywalking ... ..., hello, thank you frequently mention, let the material on this city with the new york comparable to the spiritual civilization. educate our students to exciting XX, willing to shanghai's future by copies of power, if only planted a small tree, participants in the shanghai world expo foreign guests feel: this is a forest city, pollution-free city, ancient and civilized city. better city, better life! until the time of the XX expo, then, we want to become a glorious volunteers, to changing our foreign friends in shanghai and china's long history, about our education for the world expo will contribute their efforts.we expect the majority of teachers will be great enthusiasm for the world expo into practical action to meet the world expo, the expo will be a total growth, and the city of development, the development of shanghai devote their efforts to advance hand in hand with shanghai.。
幽默搞笑的英语演讲稿范文（通用6篇）
幽默搞笑的英语演讲稿幽默搞笑的英语演讲稿范文（通用6篇）演讲稿是一种实用性比较强的文稿，是为演讲准备的书面材料。
在现在的社会生活中，演讲稿对我们的作用越来越大，那么你有了解过演讲稿吗？以下是小编收集整理的幽默搞笑的.英语演讲稿范文（通用6篇），希望能够帮助到大家。
幽默搞笑的英语演讲稿1Dear teachers and schoolmates:I’m very happy to give a lecture in English here today. The title of speech is I Love English. As everyone knows,English is very important today.It has been used everywhere in the world.It has become the most common language on Internet and for international trade. If we can speak English well,we will have more chance to succeed.Because more and more people have taken notice of it,the number of the people who go to learn English has increased at a high speed. But for myself,I learn English not only because of its importance and its usefulness,but also because of my love for it.When I learn English, I can feel a different way of thinking which gives me more room to touch the world.When I read English novels,I can feel the pleasure from the book which is different from reading the translation.When I speak English, I can feel the confident from my words.When I write English,I can see the beauty which is not the same as our Chinese… I love English,it gives me a colorful dream.I hope I can travel around the world one day. With my good English, I can make friends with many people from different contries.I can see many places of great intrests.I dream that I can go to London,because it is the birth place of English. I also want to use my good English to introduce our great places to the English spoken people,I hopethat they can love our country like us.I know, Rome was not built in a day. I believe that after continuous hard study, one day I can speak English very well. If you want to be loved, you should learn to love and be lovable. So I believe as I love English everyday , it will love me too. I am sure that I will realize my dream one day! Thank you!幽默搞笑的英语演讲稿2Good morning/afternoon!First thing first, I gotta say,wow,its funny thing to be given a chance like that.Trurh be told,I really got a little bit nervous before I stand right here ,so called stage fright.If you look specifically on me .You may find my hands shaking,pretty assembles the guy who suffered from Pakinsons disease,and legs wobbling ,like I caught so-called ball leg. Okay,lets stop going around the bush and get back to my topic today.I really like to talk a funny story I have just heard.A lady called Lucy emigrated to United States several years ago.Her spoken English is not that fluent .And one day,she is just sitting on the couch with his U.S friends Mandy watching Sit-Com.A noise of bump had the attention of Mandy,which led her to go out of the house trying to figure out what had happened.Can you imagine that Mandy go straight out with merely a sweater.So Lucy shouted at her,"Lucy ,turn your clothes on." What suprised her most,beyond her wildest imagination, is that almost all the male in this country took their head out of the window.Admittedly,Lucy made a mistake here .The word spitted means Mandy is totally naked to the reason that male looked out of the window.The right sentence shall be,"put your clothing on."The story inspires you to take a careful look on the vast difference between eastern and western culture.Thats full of it,thank you for your time!幽默搞笑的英语演讲稿3Good evening ,Ladies and Gentlemen:Thank you very much for choosing to come in such a cold night.Today my topic is about choice and process.A research shows that a man has to make 73 choices one day.With so many choices one day, people easily get so confused and afraid of making wrong choice that they hesitate and finally miss the true part of life. In my opinion, the following part is of much more importance than the choice. There is no absolute right or wrong choice but wonderful or boring life, which the process makes the difference.Life is a box of chocolate,you never know what you will get. Forrest Gump made no decision by and for himself but he accomplished great success with his strong will in the process. The process is not the road itself but the attitudes and feelings ,the caution, courage and persistance we have as we encounter new experience and unexpected obstacles. Take myself as an example, I changed my major when I became a postgraduate. After the choice,days have been harsh for me.I cannot understand the new lessons at all. For they are closely related to mathmatics which I learned nothing about before. However wuth the belief that this is the great chance for me to experience new ideas and challenge myself,I persisted. I asked for help from every channel and reorgonized my life. Gradually I could understand some parts and even found maths interesting.Moreover, I learned to act instead of complaining. In retrospect,the choice left no trace in my mind but the happiness and bitterness of the past four months becomes an unforgetable experience in my life.No matter what the choice is, enjoy the process. In the process, your potential will be inspired and new discoveries,improvement and progress will come to you. These are the most beautiful sceneries and only on the way can you see it.These make your life colorful.There is no need and I donnot want to judge whether it right or wrong for me to be here,but I congratulate to myself for I gain and enjoy this fantastic experience. So my dear friends,never worry about your choice and enjoy the process. I am sure you will get something new and intersting tonight after you chose to come here.Thank you!幽默搞笑的英语演讲稿4Mary was an English girl, but she lived in Rome. She was six years old. Last year her mother said to her, “You’re six years old now, Mary, and you’re going to begin going to a school here. You’re going to like it very much, because it’s a nice school.”“Is it an English school” Mary asked.” Yes, it is,” her mother said. Mary went to the school, and enjoyed her lessons. Her mother always took her to school in the morning and brought her home in the afternoon. Last Monday her mother went to the school at 4 o’clock, and Mary ran out of her class. “We’ve got a new girl in our class today, Mummy,” she said. “She’s six years old too, and she’s very nice, but she isn’t English. She’s German.” “Does she speak English” Mary’s mother asked.” No, but she laughs in English,” Mary said happily.幽默搞笑的英语演讲稿5Ladies and Gentlemen , Good afternoon! I68m very glad tostand here and give you a short speech. today my topic is “youth”. I hope you will like it , and found the importance in your youth so that more cherish it.First I want to ask you some questions: 1、Do you know what is youth? 2、 How do you master your youth?YouthYouth is not a time of life, it is a state of mind it is not rosy cheeks , red lips and supple knees, it is a matter of the emotions : it is the freshness it is the freshness of the deep springs of life .Youth means a temperamental predominance of courage over timidity of the appetite , for adventure over the love of ease. This often exists in a man of 60 more than a boy of 20 . Nobody grows old merely by a number of years . We grow old by deserting our ideals.Years wrinkle the skin , but to give up enthusiasm wrinkles the soul . Worry , fear , self –distrust bows the heart and turns the spirit back to dust .Whether 60 of 16 , there is in every human being 67s heart the lure of wonders, the unfailing childlike appetite of what68s next and the joy of the game of living . In the center of your heart and my heart there68s a wireless station : so long as it receives messages of beauty , hope ,cheer, courage and power from men and from the infinite, so long as you are young .When the aerials are down , and your spirit is covered with snows of cynicism and the ice of pessimism, then you are grown old ,even at 20 , but as long as your aerials are up ,to catch waves of optimism , there is hope you may die young at 80.That68s all ! Thank you!幽默搞笑的英语演讲稿6Earn english not only because of its importance and itsusefulness,but also because of my love for it.when i learn english, i can feel a different way of thinking which gives me more room to touch the world.when i read english novels,i can feel the pleasure from the book which is different from reading the translation.when i speak english, i can feel the confident from my words.when i write english,i can see the beauty which is not the same as our chinese...I love english,it gives me a colorful dream.i hope i can travel around the world one day. with my good english, i can make friends with many people from different contries.i can see many places of great intrests.i dream that i can go to london,because it is the birth place of english.I also want to use my good english to introduce our great places to the english spoken people,i hope that they can love our country like us.I know, rome was not built in a day. i believe that after continuous hard study, one day i can speak english very well. if you want to be loved, you should learn to love and be lovable. so i believe as i love english everyday , it will love me too.I am sure that i will realize my dream one day!Thank you!。
英语课前三分钟演讲稿幽默（精选15篇）
英语课前三分钟演讲稿幽默（精选15篇）英语课前三分钟幽默篇1Learn How to Say NoWe've all been taught that we should help people. It is the right thing to do and will make us popular with others. It may even win us favors in return. However, we must be realistic. We can't say yes to every request. If we did, we would fail or go crazy for sure. Sometimes we simply don't have the time to help. In this case, we must know how to say no politely.When we need to say no, here is one method we can try. First, we should tell the truth. If we really can't do something, we should just say so. Second, we should remember to refuse requests politely. We must communicate clearly, but must also be sincere and sympathetic. A true friend will understand. Finally, we must not feel guilty about saying no. Sometimes refusing others is the right thing to do. It can save ourselves, and them, a lot of trouble. In short, we cannot please everyone all the time. Refusing favors is a part of life.学习如何说不我们都被教导说，我们应该要帮助别人。
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初中英语课前三分钟笑话演讲稿
It's was little Harry's first visit to the country,
这是小哈利第一次停留在乡下，
and feeding the chickens fascinated him.
并且喂食吸引他目光的小鸡。
Late one evening he caught his first glimpse of peacock strutting in the yard,
有一天晚上，他第一次看到孔雀在院子里神气十足地昂首阔步，
feathers spread beautifully in all its glory.
得意地将羽毛很优美地向外展开,
Rushing indoors excitedly,Harry called out for his grandma.
小哈利很兴裔地，向屋内冲，大声叫他的奶奶来看……
"Oh,Granny,come see!Come see!" he exclaimed.
他高声地叫说：“喔，奶奶，快来看!快来看!”
"one of your chickens is in bloom!"
“你们家有一只鸡开花罗!”
A new business was opening and one of the owner's friends wanted to send him flowers for the occasion.
有一家公司开幕，老板的其中一位朋友为了这件太事要送他花。
They arrived at the new business site and the owner read the card,
他们到达了新的公司地点，老板读了卡片的内容：
"Rest in Place."
“安息吧”。
The owner was angry and called the florist to complain.
老板非常生气就打电话给花店抱怨。
After he had told the florist of the obvious mitake 就在他告诉花店这项明显的错误，
and how angry he was ,
以及他有多么生气之后，
the florist replied,
花庙却回答说：
"Sir,I am really sorry for the mistake,
“先生，我真的对于这项错误感到十分抱歉，
but rather than getting angry,
但是与其生气，
you should imagine this :
你还不如应当想象
somewhere there is a funeral taking place today,以下这个情况：今天有一个地方在举行葬礼，
and they have flowers with a note saying,
他们收到了花，还附上一张纸条说：
‘Congratulations on your new location' "
‘恭喜新居落成!”’
A man went to the doctor complaining of insomnia.
有一个男的去看医生，诉说着失眠的苦恼。
The doctor gave him a thorough examination,医生给他做了一次完整的检查，
found absolutely nothing physically wrong with him,完全找不到他身体有任何毛病，
and then told him,
然后告诉他;
"Listen,if you ever expect to cure your insomnia,you just have to stop taking your troubles to bed with you."
“你听好，如果你希望治疗好你的失眠，你就必须停止把你的烦恼跟着你带上床。
”
"I know" said the man, "but I can't.My wife refuses to sleep alone."
这个男的说：“我知道呀，但是我没办法呀，我老婆不肯一个人睡嘛!”
Johnny had been misbehaving and was sent to his room .
强尼因为不乖就被赶进他的房间。
After a while emerged and informed his mother that he had thought over and then said a prayer .
过了一会儿。
他就出来跟他的妈妈说他已缓!彻底反省，而且事后祷告了。
"Fine",said the pleased mother.
满心欢喜的妈妈说：“很好，
"If you ask God to help you not misbehave,He will help you."
如果你求上帝帮勘你不要不乖，她就会帮助你。
”
"Oh,I didn't ask Him to help me not misbehave,"said Johnny.
强尼说："哦，我没有求她帮助我不要不乖;
"I asked him to help you put up with me."
我求它帮助你来忍受我。
”
感谢您的阅读，祝您生活愉快。