爆笑英语翻译
爆笑英语笑话带翻译中英双语
爆笑英语笑话带翻译中英双语下面是店铺整理的爆笑英语笑话，以供大家学习参考。
爆笑英语笑话：Mental deficiency 智力缺陷"Would you mind telling me, Doctor," Bob asked ..."how you detect a mental deficiency in somebody who appears completely normal?" "Nothing is easier," he replied. "You ask him a simple question which everyone should answer with no trouble. If he hesitates, that puts you on the track." " Well, What sort of question?" "Well, you might ask him, 'Captain Cook made three trips around the world and died during one of them. Which one?' Bob thought for a moment, and then said with a nervous laugh, "You wouldn't happen to have another example would you? I must confess I don't know much about history."“医生，你能不能告诉我，”鲍勃问，“对于一个看上去很正常的人，你是怎样判断出他有智力缺陷的呢?”“再没有比这容易的了，”医生回答，“问他一个简单的问题，简单到所有人都知道答案，如果他回答得不干脆，那你就知道是怎么回事了。
爆笑英语笑话大全带翻译
爆笑英语笑话大全带翻译An old man of seventy-six went to a doctor to request a general check up as to the state of his health.The doctor looked him up thoroughly, and then told him: "Everything is fine." As the old man paid his fee, the doctor asked him: "Have you followed any regimen to help you keepphysically fit?""Well," replied the old man, "when I was married fifty years ago, I made an agreement with my wife that when I lost my temper and easily got angry, she would remain silent and when she lost her temper, I would leave the house. So for over fifty years I had enjoyed a fine outdoor life. That no doubt is the season why I can keep physically fit."一个76岁的老头去找医生给他做一次常规体检，以了解他的健康状况。
医生给他仔细检查后告诉他：“一切都很好。
”老人缴费的时候，医生问他：“你有什么养生之道帮助你保持健康呢?”老头回答道：“哦，50年前结婚时我就和妻子约定：当我生气了，容易发怒的时候，她要保持沉默;而当她生气时，我就出门去。
英语小笑话大全爆笑带翻译精选
英语小笑话大全爆笑带翻译精选好消息和坏消息"There's good news and bad news," the divorce lawyer told his client.“有好消息，也有坏消息，”离婚律师告诉他的当事人。
"I could sure use some good news," sighed the client. "What's it?"“我总能利用一些好消息吧，”当事人吧了口气说，“是什么好消息?”"Your wife isn't demanding that your future inheritances be included in the settlement."“你妻子没有要求将你未来的继承财产也划入裁决的范围。
”"And the bad news?"“那么坏消息呢?”"After the divorce, she's marrying your father."“离婚以后，她将与你父亲结婚。
”耐性Angler: You've been watching me for three hours now. Why don't you try yourself?垂钓者：你已经盯着看了三个小时了，你干嘛不自己亲自钓呢?Onlooker: I haven't got the patience.旁观者：我没那耐性。
Only Once只有一次A novice lion tamer was being interviewed. "I understand your father was also a lion tamer," the reporter queried.一位驯狮新手正在接受采访。
爆笑英语笑话带翻译长一点
爆笑英语笑话带翻译长一点爆笑英语笑话带翻译长一点YJBYS作者为大家整理了爆笑英语笑话带翻译长一点,希望大家能展颜一笑,更多内容尽在应届毕业生#笑话栏目。
爆笑英语笑话带翻译长一点(一)Teacher: This essay on your dog is, word for word, the same as your brother’s.老师:这篇有关狗的文章和你哥哥的一字不差。
Pupil: Yes, sir, it is the same dog.学生:是的，先生，这是同一只狗。
(二)Teacher: I want you to tell me the longest sentence you can think of.教师:我想要你们告诉我你们能想出的最长的.句子。
Pupil: Life imprisonment!学生:终身监禁。
长一点爆笑英语小笑话带翻译欣赏(一)Teacher: Why were the early days of history called the dark ages?教师:为什么早期的历史被称为黑暗时代?Pupil: Because there were so many knights!学生:因为那时有许多骑士!(二)Teacher: What is the Great Depression?教师:什么是大萧条?Pupil: When you get a bad report card.学生:当你拿到不好的成绩单时。
经典的长一点爆笑英语小笑话带翻译(一)Teacher: What great event happened in 1809?老师:1809年发生了什么重大事件?Pupil: Abraham Lincoln was born.学生:亚伯拉罕林肯出生了。
Teacher: Correct. And what great event happened in 1812?老师:正确。
英语笑话100篇带翻译爆笑的好笑的英语笑话带翻译
英语笑话100篇带翻译爆笑的好笑的英语笑话带翻译笑话是民族文化及社会生活中不可缺少的一环,从古至今都拥有广大的受众,深受人们喜爱。
WTT分享爆笑的好笑的英语笑话带翻译，希望可以帮助大家!爆笑的好笑的英语笑话带翻译：Unbearable 受不了了A traveler came to a small Middle Western town.He decided to stay for a few days.When he was about to write his name on the hotel register, he saw a bedbug crawling across the page.“It is really unbearable,” he said, flinging down the pen.“I've been bitten by fleas in Missouri, mosquitos in Jersey, horse flies in Kansas-but this is the first place I was ever in where abug looked over the hotel register to find out the number of my room.Why, where on earth I should go!”有个旅行家来到中西部的一个小市镇。
他决定留下待几天。
当他正要在旅店的登记薄上签名________________时，看到有个臭虫从单子上爬过去。
他就扔下手中的笔说：“真受不了了，我在密苏里被跳蚤咬过，在西泽被蚊子咬过，在堪萨斯被马蝇咬过-而在这里会有一个臭虫到登记台来找我的房间号码，我还是第一次遇到呢。
爆笑的好笑的英语笑话带翻译：A Car Thief 盗车贼A man has a long history of stealing cars.When he did it again, he was caught by the police.The prosecutor asked him, “Now tell the court how you came to take that car.” To defend himself, the man said, “The car was parked by a cemetery.I thought the owner was dead, and then I took it.”有个人有长期偷车的经历。
英语笑话爆笑短文带翻译
英语笑话爆笑短文带翻译要是有一则笑话解决不了的事，那就两则笑话，看笑话，能让我们变得开心，今天小编为大家准备了英语笑话爆笑短文带翻译，欢迎阅读!英语笑话爆笑短文带翻译【1】Navajo Message For The Moon纳瓦伙族人给月球的讯息When NASA was preparing for the Apollo Project, it took the astronauts to a Navajo reservation in Arizona for training. One day, a Navajo elder and his son came across the space crew, who were walking among the rocks.在美国国家航天局准备阿波罗航天计划时，他们让宇航员们去亚利桑那州纳瓦伙族保留区进行训练。
某天，一位纳瓦伙族老人和他儿子遇见正在岩石间穿行的航空工作人员。
The elder, who spoke only Navajo, asked a question. His son translated for the NASA people:老人问了航天局人员一个问题，但他只会说纳瓦伙族语，儿子帮他进行了翻译："What are these guys in the big suits doing?"“这些穿着厚重衣服的家伙在干嘛?”One of the astronauts said they were practicing for a trip to the moon. When his son relayed this comment, the Navajo elder got all excited and asked if it would be possible to give the astronauts a message to deliver to the moon.一个宇航员说他们正为去月球进行训练。
英语笑话带翻译爆笑
你怎么称运用了音近字的幽默效果，让人在语言的玩味中得到欢乐。
通过学习这些英语笑话，不仅可以轻松缓解学习压力，还能够提升我们对英语语言的敏感度、培养我们的幽默感。因此，学习英语笑话是非常有趣的一种学习方式。希望大家在学习英语的过程中可以多多尝试，感受不一样的英语魅力。
英语笑话带翻译爆笑
笑话是人们生活中不可或缺的一部分，它可以让人放松心情，快乐心情。而在学习英语的过程中，学习一些英语笑话不仅可以帮助我们更好地理解语言，还能增加学习的乐趣。下面就给大家介绍一些经典的英语笑话，以及它们的中文翻译，一起来感受一下英语幽默的魅力吧！
1. Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself?
4. Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
They don’t have the guts.
为什么骷髅不互相打架？
它们没有胆量。
这个笑话利用了“guts”（胆量）和“guts”（内脏）的双关语，十分巧妙地将内脏和勇气联系在了一起，给人一种突如其来的幽默感。
5. What do you call fake spaghetti?
Because it was two-tired!
为什么自行车站不起来？
因为它两个轮胎都平了！
这个笑话使用了双关语，将“tired”（疲倦的）和“tired”（轮胎瘪了）进行了巧妙的结合。这样的笑话不仅能够让人忍俊不禁，还能让学习者在欣赏笑话的同时加深对于英语语言的理解。
2. What did one wall say to the other wall?
“I’ll meet you at the corner.”
英语笑话带翻译爆笑大全
英语笑话带翻译爆笑大全A well dressed young man demanded as soon as he entered the restaurant:"Serve me, quick! Give me your best. I don't care the price."Notlike the way he talked, the waiter said to him: "HeyBuddy, it doesn't matter you have a lot of money. You are still son of somebody, and grandson of somebody else."The young man raged: "Dare you! Tell me, who wants me to be his grandson?"Thewaiter replied with ease: "Nobody. Just your grandfather."一位衣冠楚楚的年青人一进饭店就大声嚷嚷：“喂，有什么好菜尽管端上来，钱多少我不在乎。
”服务员听了很不是滋味：“哥儿们，钱多顶个屁，你不照样得做别人的儿子，就是有人要你做孙子你也不敢不做!”年青人勃然大怒：“谁敢占老子的便宜?你说，是谁不要命了，胆敢要老子做他的孙子?”服务员慢条斯理地答道：“你爷爷!”The patient is adamant. "Doc, I need a liver transplant, a kidney transplant, a heart transplant, a cornea transplant, a spleen transplant, a pancreas trans. . ." "What makes you think youneed all these?" Well, replied the patient, "My boss said if I wanted to keep my job I needed to get reorganized."这个病人显得很坚决。
关于英语小笑话大全爆笑带翻译
关于英语小笑话大全爆笑带翻译Prior to the World Championships in Rome, Ben Johnson was asked whether he would prefer a gold medal or a world record. He said that he would prefer agold medal because, "no one can evertake it away from me.”有人在本·詹姆士在罗马获得世界冠军之前问他，是愿意选择金牌还是世界纪录，他的回答是宁愿选择金牌，理由是:“不会有人把金牌再从我这里拿走。
”Q:Why did the blind man give up skydiving?问:为什么盲人会害怕跳伞?A:It was scaring the hell out of his dog.答:因为跳伞会把他们的狗吓得魂飞魄散。
A visitor to the zoo noticed one of the keepers sobbing quietly in acorner and on inquiry was told that the elephant had died.一名参观动物园的游客注意到一名饲养员正躲在角落里默默地哭泣。
他问是怎么回事，别人告诉他大象死了。
"Fond of him，was he?"the visitor asked.“他很喜欢那头大象，是吧?”游客问道。
"It's not that,"came the reply. "He's the chap who has to dig the grave."“并非如此，”那人回答说，“他负责给大象挖墓穴。
”Younger Scout: How can I tell the difference between a mushroom and a toadstool?年少的童子军:我怎样才能把蘑菇和毒覃区别开呢?Older eat one before you go to bed.年长的童子军:上床前吃一个。
关于爆笑英语笑话加翻译
关于爆笑英语笑话加翻译One day, Tim's mathematics teacher looked at his homework and saw that he had got all hissums right.一天，蒂姆的数学老师看了他的作业，发现他全做对了。
The teacher was very pleased and rather surprised.老师很高兴，同时也十分惊讶。
He called Tim to his desk and said to him, "You got all your homework right this time, Tim. Whathappened? Did your father help you?"他把蒂姆叫到桌前说："蒂姆，你这次的作业全都做对了，怎么回事?你爸爸帮你做了吗?""No, sir. He was too busy last night, so I had to do it all myself," said Tim.""不，先生，我爸爸昨天很忙，我不得不全由自己做。
"Little Robert asked his mother for two cents.小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。
"What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"“昨天给你的钱干什么了?”"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.“我给了一个可怜的老太婆，”他回答说。
"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly.“你真是个好孩子，”妈妈骄傲地说。
"Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"“再给你两分钱。
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「中国英文」Chinese EnglishChinglish “地道中文”的搞笑英语翻译1.we two who and who咱俩谁跟谁阿2.You give me stop你给我站住3Good good study,day day up好好学习天天向上4.Icall Liold bigtoyear25我叫李老大今年256.you have two down son你有两下子7.You ask me,I ask who你问我,我去问谁8.People mountain and people sea.人山人海 9.seven up eight down 七上八下10.no three no four不三不四 11. Moon under old man 月下老人12.Open the door see mountain开门见山 13. pen see you 鄙视你14.Five flowers eight doors五花八门15.I’ll give you some color to see see我要给你点颜色看看1.王八蛋：wang eight eggs2.白痴：White eat3.吃白食：eat white food4.红颜知己：red face know me5.老表：old watch6.表妹：watch sister7.别唬我：don’t tiger me 8.狗娘养的：dog mother born9.作早操：do early fuck 10.不三不四：no three no four11.马马虎虎：horse horse tiger tiger 12. 你给我站住：you give me stop13.你他妈的：you he mother’s 14.你问我我去问谁：you ask me,me ask who15.猪头三去死吧：pig head 3,go dead 16.朝三暮四：morning three night four17.怎么是你：how are you 18. how old are you怎么老是你19.要钱不给,要命有一条：want money no, want life one20.三人行,必有我师：three people go, one is my teacher1.各位知不知道“让广州充满爱”的官方翻译—Let’s make love everywhere in our Guangzhou2.你也许已走出我的视线,但从未走出我的思念You may be out of my sight,but never out of my mind 3怀才像怀孕时间长才能看到Having knowledge likes having pregnantit takes times to beawareness 4.妈妈说人最好不要错过两样东西,最后一班回家的车和一个深爱你的人. Mom said you’d better not miss two things , the last bus to home and the person who loves you deeply.5.萝卜青菜,各有所爱;误 Some prefer radish but others prefer cabbage.正 Tastes differ;No dish suits all tastes 或You can never make everyone happy6.他一向嘴硬,从不认错;误 He has always got a hard mouth and never admit a fault.正 He never says uncle.注：当一方想制服另一方时就用命令说：“Say uncle” “服输”,而not say uncle 就是“嘴硬”7.同学们都很讨厌他,因为他经常拍老师的马屁;误 The students all dislike him because he often pats the teacher's ass.正 The students all dislike him because he often licks the teacher's boots.注：以前在欧洲,臣民见到国王与王后往往要亲吻他们的靴子;后来,人们将lick the boots 引申汉语的“拍马屁”;在美国英语中,“拍马屁”还有另一种说法polish the apple,学生用擦亮的苹果来讨好老师;8.你听说了吗迈克把他的女朋友给甩了;误 Have you ever heard that Mike broke up with his girlfriend正 Have you ever heard that Mike dumped his girlfriend注：break up with sb. 虽然表示“与某人分手了”,并没说明是谁先提出来的;而dump 指“倾倒垃圾”,这里则表示像倒垃圾一样地甩掉;9.人都是这山望着那山高,对自己的现状没有满意的时候;误 Almost all people think that the other mountain is higher than the one he's standing on. They never feel satisfied with what they've already got.正 Almost all people think that the grass is greener on the other hill. They never feel satisfied with what they've already got.注：“这山望着那山高”是指人不满足于现状的心理,它在英语中已经有了现成的说法,即the grass is greener on the other hill他山的草更绿,因此我们借用即可,10. “big river goes to the east,all the star follows beidou”,这句英文大意就是：大河向东流,天上的星星参北斗;这首“洋气十足”的好汉歌的英文版挟着天雷滚滚而来.11. 人山人海：有人直译为：People mountain people sea. 这就是「中国英文」,老外很难理解;他们指「人多」时,通常只说：「There is a large crowd of people.」12. 天下无不散的宴席：有人直译为：There are no feasts in the world which do not break up at last. All good things come to an end. 意思是：所有好的事情,总有结束的一天;China：拆哪儿查哪儿圈哪儿切哪儿亲哪儿去哪儿吃哪儿钱儿呢English:应给利息,阴沟里洗,硬改历史,妈妈,我不想学英语了,因为老师不靠谱,还老教我们骂人：他说今天是Today,昨天也是yestoday; 他一会儿说Yes,一会儿说Nice, 一会儿说Bus,一会儿说Goose, 最后还说都guess中式英语按照拼音的顺序排了出来,如下表;1.What the fuck is going on到底他妈的怎么回事2.You son of bitch你个狗娘养的3."同学是某偏远地区的,英语发音一直不标准,老师英文也是发不准,所以学生更是一口地道的土腔英语;话说同学的妹妹刚上初一,学英语的积极性狂高,每天早晨天不亮就开始朗读单词,这天像往常一样,继续拼命的读,他爹就蹲在窗户底下抽烟袋;小妹妹念“hands音:汉子,hands”,“two hands偷汉子;他爹听完就止不住的皱眉,一大早就听见闺女要偷汉子,心想怪不得听说外国人开放,书上都这么写;小妹妹继续读“hands,hands,two hands偷汉子” I have two hands.;汉子,偷汉子,俺还偷汉子4.话说一个国内知名企业,一天来了一个重要的外宾,下面是前台的对话;前台小姐：“hello.”你好;美国人：“hi.”你好;前台小姐：“you have what thing”你有什么事情美国人：“can you speak English”你能和我说英语吗前台小姐：“if i not speak English,i am speaking what”如果我不是在说英语,那我在说什么呢美国人：“can anybody else speak English”这里有别的人能说英语吗前台小姐：“you yourself look,all people are playing ,no people have time,you can wait,you wait, you not wait,you go”.你自己看看,所有的人都在忙着,没有人有时间,你能等你就等,你不能等你说走美国人：“good heavens. anybody here can speak English”我的天啦,这里没有人能讲英语吗前台小姐：“shout what shout,quiet a little,you have what thing”嚷什么嚷,安静一点,你还有什么事情美国人：“i want to speak to your head.”我要找你们的头儿;前台小姐：“head notzai . you tomorrow come”头不在,你明天来5..小明上英文课时跟老师说：May I go to the toilet 老师说：Goa head.小明就坐了下来;过了一会儿,小明又跟老师说：May I go to the toilet 老师说：Goa head.小明又坐了下来;他旁边的同学于是忍不住问：你不是跟老师说要上厕所吗怎么不去小明说：你没听老师说「去你个头」啊6.某女领导会见外宾,要求翻译要严格按她的意思翻,不许走样;外宾一见到女士,立刻按照西方的习惯拍马屁道："Miss,you are very beautiful."翻译照翻,领导心花怒放,嘴上还要谦虚一下：“哪里,哪里”;翻译不敢怠慢,把她的话翻成英文："Where Where"外宾一愣,干脆马屁拍到底："Every where, every where;"翻译：“你到处都很漂亮;”领导更高兴了,但总是要客气一下：“不见得,不见得”;翻译赶紧翻成英文："You are not all owed to see , you are not all owed to see."7.某男,亦粗通英文,至使馆,有表要填,有一栏是：Sex,该男久思,毅然下笔：“Once a week”;签证官观后暴笑,曰：“This item should be filled in with male or female.”该男顿时赧颜,思之,填下“female”;官楞之,曰：“shouldn’t it be male”男急释曰：“I am a normal man , so I have sex with female.”8.小强去看电影,到了电影售票处,发现一个老外和售票小姐连说带比得好半天,就自告奋勇的上前做翻译,售票小姐说：麻烦你告诉她,现在坐票售完了只剩下站票,如果要看要站着看;小强转头就对老外说：no sit see, stand see. if see stand see.老外回答说：sorry I don’t understand your English.小强就对售票小姐说：哦,他说他不懂英文.......9.下面是一位朋友在各个银行之间为了一点存款的事,折腾了好半天,结果是一事无成;去了中国建设银行,CBCConstruction Bank of China,营业员问,“存不存”后面是中国银行的同志,BCBank of China,回答道“不存;”中国农业银行的同志说,ABCAgriculture Bank of China,“啊,不存”;中国工商银行的同志来火了,ICBCIndustry and Commercial Bank of China,“爱存不存”;民生银行听了,CMSBChina Min sheng Bank,接上话,“存吗傻比”招商银行,CMBC,也应答道,“存吗白痴”这位顾客火了,我的事关你啥事我去兴业银行,CIB,“存一百”;国家开发银行的同志听了,CDBChina Development Bank,在我们这里也,“存点吧”北京市商业银行的同志说了,BCCBBeijing City Commercial Bank,“白存存不”想了半天,还是汇丰银行,HSBC,答话了,“还是不存”结果务功而返;一、永远都不要停止微笑,即使是在你难过的时候,说不定有人会因为你的笑容而爱上你; Never stop smiling, not even when you're sad, someone might fall in love with your smile.二、一个真正的朋友会握着你的手,触动你的心; A true friend is the one who holds your hand and touches your heart.三、你可能只是这个世界上的一个人,但对于某人来说,你就是全世界; You may only be a person in this world, but for someone, you're the world.。