2018年6月浙江省高考英语读后续写试题分析上

2018年6月浙江省高考英语读后续写试题分析（上）

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2018年6月读后续写题型再次出现在浙江省高考英语科目写作第二节，该题型

提供一段350词以内的语言材料，要求考生根据该材料内容、所给段落开头语和所标示关键词语进行续写（150词左右），将其发展成一篇与给定材料有逻辑衔接、情节和结构完整的短文。

下面让我们一起来分析一下本次高考读后续写试题。

一给定材料和题目要求

It was summer，and my dad wanted to treat me to a vacation like never before. He decided to take me on a trip to the Wild West.

We took a plane to Albuquerque，a big city in the state of New Mexico. We reached Albuquerque in the late afternoon. Uncle Paul，my dad’s friend，picked us up from the airport and drove us up to his farm in Pecos.

His wife cooked us a delicious dinner and we got to know his sons Ryan and Kyle. My dad and I spent the night in the guestroom of the farm house listening to the frogs and water rolling down the river nearby. Very early in the morning，Uncle Paul woke us up to have bre akfast. “The day starts at dawn on my farm，” he said. After breakfast，I went to help

Aunt Tina feed the chickens，while my dad went with Uncle Paul to take the sheep out to graze （吃草）. I was impressed to see my dad and Uncle Paul riding horses. They looked really cool.

In the afternoon，I asked Uncle Paul if I could take a horse ride，and he said yes，as long as my dad went with me. I wasn’t going to take a horse ride by myself anyway. So，my dad and I put on our new cowboy hats，got on our horses，and headed slowly towards the mountains. “Don’t be late for supper，” Uncle Paul cried，“and keep to the track so that you don’t get lost！” “OK！” my dad cried back. After a while Uncle Paul and his farm house were out of sight. It was so peaceful and quiet and the colors of the brown rocks，the deep green pine trees，and the late afternoon sun mixed to create a magic scene. It looked like a beautiful woven （编织的）blanket spread out upon the ground just for us.

注意：

1.所续写短文的词数应为150左右；

2.至少使用5个短文中标有下划线的关键词语；

3.续写部分分为两段，每段的开头语已为你写好；

4.续写完成后，请用下划线标出你所使用的关键词语。

二试题分析

1. 短文梗概

本次试题中的短文仍然是一篇以旅行为话题的记叙文，全文共324词，讲述了作者与父亲来到美国西部荒野，体验农场生活过程中骑马历险的故事。

2. 故事?索与逻辑

所给短文共四段。其中，一、二两段介绍了故事发生的背景，包括：

When（旅行时间）：in summer 某年夏天

Where（旅行地点）：the Wild West，Uncle Paul’s farm in Pecos 西部荒野、位于佩科斯的保罗叔叔的农场

Who（主要人物）：I，my dad，Uncle Paul 我（作者）、父亲、保罗叔叔

Why（旅行目的）：my dad wanted to treat me to a vacation like never before父亲希望“我”度过一个前所未有的假期

第三段讲述了作者来到农场后当天晚上和第二天早上发生的故事，如：享受美味的晚餐、听着蛙声入睡、清晨起床、喂鸡牧羊。这些都给他带来了前所未

有的新奇感受，尤其是看到父亲与保罗叔叔骑马的潇洒模样，羡慕不已，为下文故事的展开埋下伏笔。第四段逐渐展开故事主干：第二天下午，作者征得保罗叔叔的同意后，在父亲的陪伴下开始了愉快的骑马体验之旅，沿途的美景令人神往…… 总的来说，在所给短文中作者所写的所有经历和体验都是为了突出此次旅行是前所未有的，即原文第一段提到的“a vacation like never before”。因此，考生在续写故事、构思情节时也应该顾及到这一点。

3. 关键词语

本次读后续写试题所给短文标出的10个关键词语中有7个名词、2个动词、1个形容词，具体可分为以下类别：

人物：Dad，Uncle Paul

事物：farm house，river，sheep，track，sight 动作行为：feed，get lost

描述性词语：late

考生在续写中用到5个关键词语并不难，需要注意的是：在使用关键词语时根据时态和语态的需要可以改变动词的形式，可以改变名词的单复数，但是不能改变关键词语在原文中的含义和词性。例如：“track”一词兼有名词和动词两种词性，它在所给短文中是名

词，意思是“小道、小径”，因此考生在使用该词时也应该用该词性和该词义。在“We couldn’t find the tracks of the rabbit”和“We tries to track the rabbit”这两个例句中使用的“track”就与原文不符，不能作为划线的关键词语标出。

4. 续写段落与开头语

续写分成两段，第一段的开头语是：“Suddenly a little rabbit jumped out in front of my horse.”第二段的开头语是：“We had no idea where we were and it was getting dark.”根据第二段的开头语我们知道作者与父亲迷路了，因此第一段中“兔子的突然出现”是故事发展的转折点，之后发生的一切使作者原本愉快的骑马之旅陷入危险，而第二段则应重点围绕迷路后如何脱险展开故事情节。

三答题建议

1. 文体结构

全文以记叙文体为主，可在第二段的结尾适当抒发感情、发表议论（对旅行或遇险经历的看法等）。试题说明中明确指出“续写部分分为两段”，因此考生应紧接每段的开头语答题，不要在开头语下方另起一行写，更不要在续写故事时另外分段，这样不符合试题的要求。词数要求在150词左右（词数没有上限，但

是不能少于130词），建议两段的词数最好基本保持平衡，避免一段过多一段过少的情况。

2. 情节内容

根据续写部分两段所给段落的开头语，第一段主要讲述兔子突然出现后发生的事，这是续写故事的开端（the beginning），考生在构思故事情节的发展（the rising action）时，要注意与下文的衔接，即作者和父亲迷路了。可以进行合理的情节设计，如：（1）马受到惊吓后一路狂奔，于是“我”与父亲迷路了；（2）“我”与父亲被兔子吸引，追逐兔子过程中迷路了；（3）“我”与父亲在与兔子玩耍或追逐兔子时，看到其他美景，不知不觉走入歧途了……

第二段主要围绕作者和父亲迷路后如何寻路返回、如何脱险展开，这是续写故事的高潮部分（climax），原文中的划线关键词语“river，track”可以作为展开故事情节的线索。当然，续写的故事要有结局（the ending）。可以进行合理的情节设计，如：（1）沿河而行返回农场；（2）成功找到来时的小径返回农场；（3）保罗叔叔见“我们”迟迟未归，前来寻找，“我们”最终获救；（4）生火、发信号或打电话求救，成功脱险……

在第二段的最后考生可适当对这次旅行或骑马遇

险的经历抒发感情或发表议论，从而升华诸如父爱、热爱自然、体验生存过程、勇敢解决问题等主题。当然，考生也可以撇开这些高大的主题，从文章开头的“a vacation like never before”的角度对旅行和遇险经历

作一总结，与开头首尾呼应，使整个故事浑然一体。

3. 语言表达

（1）时态

所给短文叙述的是发生在过去的事情，采用过去时态，因此，考生在续写故事时应沿用过去时态。结尾的抒情或议论部分若针对当时的情况，用过去时态；若针对普遍情况，则用现在时态。

（2）词汇

本次试题的续写内容与“骑马”有关，所以考生势必要用到相关的词汇。如：

下马dismount the horse；get （down）off the horse；climb （down）off the horse

摔下马fall off the horse

抓紧马hold the horse；grip the horse；cling onto the horse

策马加速spur the horse （例：I spurred the horse，trying to speed up.）

拉紧缰绳hold the reins sharply；grab the reins

sharply；pull on the reins sharply

马疾驰gallop

（因受惊吓）突然快跑bolt

马小跑trot

马后腿直立rear （例：The horse reared and threw me off. ）

马嘶neigh；whinny （例：With a terrified whinny the horse bolted.）

（3）语法结构

语法结构的丰富性和准确性是续写评分时的一个重要标准，所以考生应避免句型单一化，尽量使用不同的语法结构，如：定语从句、状语从句、非谓语结构、倒装结构、常用句型（so...that...，it作形式主语或形式宾语，调句型）等。

（4）细节描写

如果说情节是故事的骨架，那么细节就是故事的血肉。精彩生动的故事情节需要在细节描写中展现，使人受到感染并留下深刻印象，这就要求考生要善于在叙事中进行适当的描写，包括环境描写、景物描写，以及对人物的外貌、动作、语言、心理、神态等描写。例如，续写第一段中，面对突然出现的兔子，可通过心理、神态或语言等细节描写表现作者的兴奋和好奇。

若设计马受惊狂奔的情节，可通过心理、神态、动作等细节描写来表现作者的恐惧；若设计欣赏美景的情节，则可通过环境和景物描写来烘托作者的愉悦和陶醉之情。续写第二段中，发现迷路后，可通过环境描写以及心理、神态、语言、动作描写生动形象地展现作者情感的变化：害怕（frightened）、焦急（worried）、后悔（regretful）、冷静（calm）、如释重负（relieved）、愉快（delighted）。

（5）语句衔接

这是记叙文体的文章，情节的发展通常按照时间顺序展开，所以考生在续写故事时应该有效地使用表示时间的短语或从句，使语句更加连贯、结构更加紧凑。例如：on our arrival，after that，then，the moment I saw the rabbit，when we looked around，eventually等。不太建议使用first，second，last 这样机械的关联词。

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